Alright. I should just do it today. I should just get it over with. There’s no point in waiting any longer...

Kris walked into the classroom and sat next to me. He gave me a cheerful smile. “Good morning.” he said pleasantly.

“Good morning...” I answered shyly. Great, I’m getting nervous! Come on Ji Eun, be brave. You can do this!

I opened my mouth, but just then the teacher rushed into the classroom. “Alright guys, today you have a pop quiz!” he said happily. The whole class groaned, me included.

Another chance at confessing: gone.

It‘s been like this for about a week now. I always think that I’ve worked up enough courage to confess how I feel, but whenever I see him, I just get too nervous and I freak out! I clenched my hands into fists. I had been so close today!

It hasn’t just been at school either. Ever since he asked me out, Kris has been walking me to school every morning. Whenever I leave the house, no matter how early or late I am, he’s always at the bottom of the stairs waiting for me. As much as it makes my heart flutter to see his smile every morning, I always feel so anxious around him!

But the weirdest thing is, he never mentions the confession. Ever.

He talks with me a lot when we’re together, but he never asks me to go out with him, or mentions his confession. I’m glad he’s not pressuring me, but at the same time, I’m wondering if he’s lost interest.

I really hope he hasn’t! Not after I’ve just started to accept the fact that I like him...

I’ve also gotten to know more about him. And I swear, the more I get to know him, the more I like him. There’s been times when I’ve completely forgotten why I used to hate him.

And then there’s his past relationships. We’ve both steered clear of this topic. I don’t think he wants to bring it up, and I’m too afraid to do it. Even though I know he’s played around with other girls before and he’s probably been in a lot of relationships, I can’t bring myself to hear him say it.

“15 more minutes!” the teacher called.

I snapped out of my reminiscing and focused on the quiz, pushing Kris out of my mind for a while.

~

“Alright, time’s up. Put your quizzes on my desk.”

I sighed in relief. I think I managed to pass this time. I stood up, about to hand my paper in.

Kris reached for my quiz. “I’ll hand it in for you.” His hand lightly brushed against mine when he took my paper.

“Thanks.” I murmured, blushing a bit. I watched him walk up to the desk and back to his seat. When he noticed me staring, he gave me a smile. I quickly directed my gaze to the opposite side of the room. Crap! He noticed me! So embarrasing!

As soon as the lunch bell rang, he asked, “Do you want to go for a walk?”

“A walk? Sure.”

As I walked out of class with him, I noticed Chanyeol and Xiumin staring at us.

Kris noticed it too. “Don’t your friends care that you’re hanging around me a lot?”

“I’m not sure.” I said. “Well they’re probably not thrilled with it, because....” I didn’t finish my sentence, not wanting him to hear the rest of it.

“Why? Is it because they think I’ll hurt you? Or because I’ve been with a lot of girls?” I grimaced. I couldn’t help but feel a bit jealous when he said that.

“Pretty much.” I muttered.

He sighed. “Well I don’t blame them I guess. I’m not too proud of what I did in the past.” We walked over to a shady area underneath a few trees near the soccer field and sat down.

There was a few moments of silence. I found myself wondering....

“Why do you do it?” I blurted out.

“What?”

“Why do you make girls your targets? Why do you want to hurt people so badly?”

He looked at the ground awkwardly. “Oh...”

“Ah, sorry. I didn’t mean to just randomly ask you that. I was just curious...” I shouldn’t just ask that kind of question randomly!

He shook his head. “No, it’s fine.” He took a deep breath.

“My best friend really liked a girl. She was popular, pretty, and everyone liked her. Regardless, he still had the courage to confess to her and she agreed to go out with him. But then I caught her talking to one of her friends. It turns out she was just using him to make her ex-boyfriend jealous. She kept going on about how she would never actually date him for real. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that, but in the end, it didn’t matter. She broke up with him. And she was totally honest with him too. He was really depressed after that. He just wasn’t the same anymore. I wanted him to become his old self again, and so...” he sighed. “I wanted to get revenge for him. I decided to make her fall for me and I actually managed to do it. It took a while, but I did it. And then I broke her heart, just like she broke his.”

“Afterwards, I just couldn’t stop. I wanted to see if I could do it again, so I tried again with a different girl. I didn’t care about her that much, so I rejected her afterwards. And before I knew it, I just naturally flirted with girls, and tried to get them to like me. That’s when I started creating ‘targets.’”

He paused and looked at me. “But when I tried to get to you, things were different. You didn’t fall for me like all of those other girls. You were different. I was wondering why you hated me so much, and then I just realized how stupid I’ve been acting. No wonder you didn’t like me.” He looked away. “I know that I’ve been a horrible guy in the past, but I really do want to try being in a real relationship now.” He smiled. “I usually wouldn’t tell this to anybody, but I feel like I can trust you.”

So this was the reason why he was such a player? I always thought he was just doing it for fun, but there was a reason behind it. I guess if my friend was hurt like that, I’d be pretty angry as well.

And now he wants to change, because of me? I felt.....happy. But I was still confused.

“Why?” I asked him. “Why do you trust me? Why do you want to date me? You could probably have any girl in this school if you wanted to. Why me?”

“Because you’re....you.” he told me. “You’re feisty, fun, cute.” I blushed. “And you’re strong; you challenged me head on. You’re not one of those air headed girls who falls for any guy who looks their way. You’re really confident, but at the same time you can be shy as well. Overall, you’re really interesting. I don’t want another girl. I want you.”

He really thinks that about me? I looked at the ground, embarrassed. I didn’t even know he paid that much attention to me. The fact that he did, and that he’s saying all of these things about me, it just makes me feel completely ecstatic.

I looked up. He was gazing at me intently. As soon as our eyes met, he gave me a radiant smile. That beautiful smile that I’ve grown to love without realizing it.

I want to date him. I want to help him. I want to be there for him.

“I like you.”

His eyes widened. It took me a few seconds to realize why.

I just confessed.

I quickly raised my hand to cover my mouth. I can’t believe I just did that! I turned around so that he wouldn’t see how red my face was. Was it too soon? Maybe I should have waited a bit more. I just felt so happy and I couldn’t control my feelings and I’m not thinking straight right now!

“Ji Eun?”

Oh no, I can’t face him! Not after I just confessed! Please don’t make me turn around!

“Ji Eun, please look at me.”

I can’t you idiot! I’m too embarassed!

I felt his hand on my shoulder, gently turning me around. I was facing him, but I continued to cover my face with my hands. I heard him give a small chuckle.

Very gently, he pried my hands away from my face. As he did, I squeezed my eyes shut. I wish I could just disappear right now!

“Why are you scared?” he asked me quietly. “I like you too. I’ve told you that already.”

….That’s true. Why am I so scared? Now I feel like an idiot for being so embarrassed.

I slowly opened my eyes, and then I held back a gasp of surprise. Kris had gotten very close. He was staring directly at me.

And once again, he raised his hand to my face, cupping it gently.

This scene, it’s almost exactly like what happened after school, in the classroom...

He smiled. “I won’t run away this time.”

He got closer.

I gulped. I think he’s really going to do it this time!

He continued to get closer.

My heart was pounding furiously. I attempted to take a breath and failed.

His face was directly in front of mine.

My eyes fluttered shut.

Very slowly and smoothly, he pressed his lips to mine.

Even though I had been expecting it, I still felt shocked as he kissed me.

Oh no. What do I do? I’ve never kissed a guy before so I have no idea!

I tried my best not to freak out. When I finally relaxed I began to kiss back a bit, and I felt him smile when I did.

I was the one who broke the kiss first, because I ran out of air. I took a few deep breaths.

Wow. I just had my first kiss. With Kris.

Kris was grinning, his hand still on my face. “My girlfriend is so pretty.” he said to me.

My heart pounded again at his words. He called me his girlfriend. I’m his girlfriend now. We’re dating. I am dating Kris.

I repeated these words in my head, over and over again. I almost couldn’t believe it.

And then another thought popped up:

What is everyone else going to think of this?

…...

“Um...Kris?”

“Yeah?”

“I have a favour to ask...”

“What is it?”

I bit my lip, wondering if he would get angry at me for asking this. “Do you think...we could keep our relationship a secret for now? I’m not sure if my friends will approve of this...I just want them to start to like you first, and then we can announce it.”

He didn’t respond. “Please?” I asked in a small voice.

He smiled. “Alright. If that’s what you want, then we can keep it a secret for now.” I sighed in relief. I’m just not sure if I should spring the news on everyone just yet. I’ll just get Kris to hang around us more often, and then everyone can see that he’s a good person, and when we announce that we’re dating they won’t mind. Perfect!

Kris got up and brushed himself off. “Lunch is going to end soon, so we should get back.” He helped me get up. “Let’s go.” he said, about to start walking.

“Wait.” I said. He stopped and looked at me. I stood on the tips of my toes and gave him a small kiss on the lips. I beamed up at him. “Now we can go.”

He just stared at me, and then he laughed. We began to walk back to class.

“So cute.” I heard him mutter.

______________

sorry that it took a while for me to update -.- this week is not going well for me :(

but I have lots of free time now ^^ so I'm thinking of starting another fanfic (maybe...)

but for now this will be my focus! >:3

thanks for being patient and for the comments <3 you are all awesome :D