Zico

“He’s an ” I said, looking out the window, at the night sky

“Excuse me?” Zhara asked, looking at me. I turned my focus back to the road

“He’s an ” I repeated

“How so?” She asked

“Who brings their girlfriend to a party where their ex-girlfriend is?” I asked, looking at her

“He may have his reasons” She answered, looking at the dashboard

“Well if you ask me, I would never do that to an ex-girlfriend. Only a low-life, of a jerk like Jay would” I said, voicing out my frustration. How could jay be so selfish? You dump a beautiful girl like Zhara only to go after a like Seo Young.

“Can we please stop talking about him? I’m getting sick just by hearing the name” She said, putting her head in her opened hands

“I’m sorry” I said, padding her on the back.

“Its okay” she said, looking up at me. She gave me a weary smile, almost reassuring me everything was going to be ok. I felt bad for her. She must be having a horrible night.

“You’re tired right?” I asked, already knowing the answer

“Yes” She said, nodding her head

“You want to come over my house or should I drop you at their house?” I asked. I was feeling kind of lonely and if noona came over, I would be a little happy.

“Yeah, Can I come over to yours?”She asked, sitting up straight.

“Yeah, Noona is welcome anytime!” I said, pointing my index finger in the air

“Thanks” She said, giving me a smile.

“Anytime” I said

I kept on driving until I came around to my apartment complex. I drove around, looking for an open space closer to the building. I found a parking space a little bit far from the complex. I turned off the car and took the key out of the ignition.

“Zha-“ I was about to say but I stopped. Zhara had fallen asleep while I was driving. Her head was lying on her shoulder. She looked very beautiful with her hair circling her face. I tried waking her up.

“Zhara” I said, gently shaking her. No response. She was really asleep. She gave me no choice but to piggy-back her up to my apartment

I got out of the car and walked over to the passenger seat. I opened the door, and leaned over her to unbuckle her seat belt. As I was doing that, I felt her stir. She still looked sleepy but she smiled at me. As soon as she did that, she went back to sleep again. I dragged her legs out of the car, and positioned her body towards me. I bent down with my back facing her, and put her arms around my neck. I then put my hands around her thigh and lifted her up close to my body. I   searched for her purse. I found it.  I closed the door and got up. As I was walking towards the building, I felt Zhara tighten her grip around my neck. She felt very warm, and her breathing was slow. I walked into the building and got into the elevator.

“You’re so warm” She whispered in my ear. I had never held anyone this close to me before but it felt good :)

I got out after the elevator stopped on the 4^th floor. I went towards my apartment and typed in the code to open the door. I opened the door and went in.

 I slowly took off my shoes because of Zhara at my back. I didn’t want to wake her up.

I walked to my bedroom and gently lay her down on my bed. I took off her shoes and set them by the bed. I then got the Afghan blanket that my sister-in-law had made for me. I gently layed it on top of her. After that I changed out of my clothes, took a warm shower, and got dressed to go to sleep.

When I went to the bedroom, I found Zhara already awake just sitting there.

“Hey” She said, getting up

“How did I get up here?” She asked, walking towards me

“I carried you” I answered, looking down

“What!!! You could have just waked me up” She said.

“It’s okay” I said. It really was okay. I didn’t mind that I had to carry noona.

“Thank you, Zico” She said, slightly bowing. It felt very awkward to see a grown woman bow to me.

“It’s ok. That’s what friends are for” I said. I wanted her to quit doing that.

“Umm, Can I take a shower now?” She asked.

“Yeah” I answered. I wonder why she kept on asking permission to do everything.

“I’ll go make some popcorn” I said, walking out. When I went into the kitchen I heard the water running.

I made some butter free popcorn and warmed some soy milk. I put the snack and drinks on a tray and walked into my room.

When I opened the door, I saw Zhara standing in the middle of the room with a towel wrapped around her body. Water was dripping down from her wet hair.

“Umm sorry” She said, looking down

“Its okay” I said, walking to my drawer. I grabbed a black t-shirt and some tight pj pants that had gotten too small.

“I hope these fit” I said, handing it to her. I turned to walk out so that she could change. I waited a few minutes before I heard my name being called.

I opened the door and stepped inside. There in front of me, stood Zhara all dressed up in the pj pants and t-shirt with her wet hair tied in a bun.

“You hungry?” I asked, walking towards the table where I had set the snack and drinks down. I sat down on the pillow, and grabbed one of the cups of soy milk.

Zhara came and sat across me and took the other cup. We clashed our cups together and took a drink.

“What’s in this?” She asked

“It tastes very good” She said

“I made it myself and I put some PandanusPandanus leaves in it” I said, grabbing a handful of popcorn.

“What’s Pandanus?” She asked, also taking a handful of popcorn.

“Ah I don’t really know how to explain it but it’s a type of tree leave that sort of tastes like vanilla” I said, taking another sip of my soy milk

“Oh okay” She said, combing her hair.

I desperately wanted to ask the question that had been bothering me the whole night. I decided that this would be my only chance to ask.

“Ah umm” I said, looking down at the table. I left my eyes to look at her.

“Ah what” Zhara asked, looking at me straight in the eyes.

“Can I ask you a question?” I asked

“Yeah sure” She replied, smiling

“What happened in the bathroom?” I asked, looking out the window. This felt so wrong. I was invading her personal life. I looked at her and the smile had seeped from her face. She looked gloomy.

“You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to” I said. I had made her uncomfortable.

“No it’s ok. You deserve to know” She said, taking a deep breath.

I sat there, all quiet, waiting for an answer. She finally opened and spoke.

“Jay and Seo Young are getting married. When I went to the bathroom it was an unfortunate event that I bumped into her while in there. She told me, and quickly left. I couldn’t take it and had a meltdown” She said, taking in another breath of air. That was quite a mouthful.

“Oh” I said. I didn’t really have anything to say. After her words had sunk in, I remembered something.

“Wait, Jay never talked about marrying Seo Young” I said. I knew for a fact because it had been 4 years and in the 4 years that Zhara wasn’t here, they could have gotten married but didn’t.

“What!” She asked, her face confused

“She must have been lying” I said. I knew how Seo Young was. She was a lair and manipulative person.

“Talk to him” I suggested

“No, it’s okay. Let’s just forget this ever happened” She said, drinking the last of her soy milk.

“Okay” I said, getting up. I took the empty cups and the half full bowl of popcorn and left. I washed the dishes and went back to the room.

“I’ll sleep on the couch for tonight” I said, grabbing one of the pillows off the bed.

“No, it’s okay. We can share” She said, pulling back the covers.

“Ah ah” I said, scratching the back of my head. This is going to be one awkward night.

“Ok” I said, putting back the pillow.

“Which side do you want?” She asked, sitting on the bed.

“Either side is fine” I said

“Okay, you sleep on the left and I’ll sleep on the right” She said. I moved to the left side of the bed, while Zhara scooted across to the right.

I got under the covers and turned to face the right so that my back would be facing her. It was uncomfortable sleeping like this, so I turned again to my left to see Zhara lying there with her eyes closed. Her breathing wasn’t heavy which meant that she really wasn’t asleep.

“Seo Young’s a and Jay’s a prick” I whispered, still frustrated.

“Please just drop it, ok” She said, opening her eyes

“Ok” I said. I closed my eyes, hoping to fall asleep. I fell asleep but was awoken by a soft cry. I slowly opened my eyes to see Zhara curled up in a fetal position with tears flowing down her face.

“Zhara, are you ok?” I asked, sitting up.

“Jay, why?” She asked, reaching out for my hand. I gave her my hand. Ok, why would she be calling Jay’s name in the middle of the night?

“Umm, I don’t know what you’re talking about” I said, trying to play it cool. She abruptly got up and sat facing me.

“I love you” She said, looking at me. I leaned in closer to take a look. I think she was sleep talking.

“I love you too, Zhara” I said, trying to play along. As soon as I said that, she hugged me. I put my arms around her and held her in my embrace. When we parted, she leaned in close to me. I had to obviously play along, so I too leaned in towards her. I saw her eyes closing. CRAP! She’s going to kiss me, I thought. I was freaking out. This wasn’t supposed to happen.  Her soft plum lips crushed onto mine.  I gently parted opened her lips with my tongue. I slipped in my tongue and met her’s. We played with each other. I kept on on her lower lip. This felt wrong, but it felt so good. I wrapped my arms around her waist and gently layed her down on the bed. I couldn’t take it. I wanted her. I wanted her body. Her everything. She wrapped her arms around, and pulled me in closer. I went in for her neck. Kissing it, it. This new feeling felt so good. I didn’t know how to stop nor didn’t want to stop. She gripped my neck tighter and letting out a slow moan.

“Jay…ah…” she said. This felt wrong. I took off my shirt and layed on top of her. I slipped my hands under her shirt, about to go deeper. I stopped, realizing what I was doing. I was doing this to her without her consent. What if we both got up the next morning and she accuses me of . I pushed myself off her, and put on my shirt. I needed to stop and think about other people’s feelings.

“Jay, why did you stop” Zhara asked, supporting her weight on her elbows.

“This is wrong, let’s just sleep” I said, throwing the covers over me. I turned so that I wouldn’t be facing her.

“Jay, baby why are you being so cold?” She asked, rubbing my back.

“Leave me alone. I’m not Jay” I answered, covering my ears. I needed to ignore her or else she’ll keep on going on. She stopped and turned back. I slowly drifted off to sleep wonderland. What the hell was I thinking? I thought. I finally fell asleep but my cell phone alarm woke me up at 5:30am. I needed to go pick up Eun ji. I quickly took and a shower and got dressed. I left a note for Zhara:

Zhara,

Sorry about last night. I didn’t mean to do what I did to you. You don’t deserve that. I have gone to pick up a co-worker. You can stay as long as you want or leave if you wish. I’m so sorry again about yesterday. If you don’t wish to ever see me again, I’m fine with that and I’ll respect your decision.

 -Zico.

I left the note by the bed side and left the room.