Thursday Evening, Week 16

Student Lounge Study Rooms

Chorong sat alone in the study room watching videos from the performance on the acting department website. She was supposed to be studying but she felt like she needed to see the videos again, just to reassure herself that she'd done her best that night.

All the scenes had gone really well except one. The kiss scene with Sungjae.

Chorong replayed the scene several times, watching her expressions carefully. Sungjae had done an impressive job making the stage kiss look incredibly convincing but anyone with a trained eye would be able to notice that she'd momentarily dropped character right before it happened.

"Damn…I didn't think it was so obvious…" 

Chorong put her head in her hands with a distressed sigh. How could she have let her anxiety get in the way like that during such an important performance?

The door of the study room suddenly burst open and Chorong looked up.

It was Changsub.

"Chorongie guess what!" He said excitedly.

He sat down next to her and pulled out his phone.

"We finally found an apartment! It's not too far from school and there's two bedrooms and a nice view of the city. See it's nice right? We're still looking for another roommate but we're planning on moving in next week and it's gonna be so much better than the dorms! You'll be able to sleep over with Bomi and we can watch movies together and…"

Changsub noticed Chorong's downcast expression and stopped his rambling.

"Wait…Chorongie what's wrong?"

Chorong opened to answer but she suddenly felt overwhelmed and couldn’t find words.

Changsub's eyes fell on her laptop screen. The video was still playing but it was now showing one of Eunji's scenes.

"Is that…is that from the play?" Changsub asked.

Chorong quickly shut the laptop. Eunji's face was the last one she wanted to see right now.

"I should've been more professional." Chorong mumbled bitterly.

"What are you talking about?" Changsub said, confused.

Chorong looked down at the lid of her laptop.

"Changsub-ah…I didn't tell you but there were recruiters from some well-known entertainment agencies watching in the audience that night."

"Recruiters?" He asked.

Chorong nodded.

"Yeah…I really thought I had a chance…but I found out Eunji was the only one who got called and I just feel so…disappointed in myself…"

Changsub looked slightly taken aback.

"Rong what are you even saying? You were so good…"

"But I wasn't…"

Chorong felt tears stinging at her eyes.

"What am I doing I can't cry over something like this…"

She hastily tried to wipe her eyes.

Changsub reached over and took her hands.

"Hey…it's okay, just tell me what you're feeling. You don't have to hide it from me." He said gently.

Chorong chewed her lip. She hadn't told Changsub about what had happened backstage with the director's last minute change or what happened during the scene with Sungjae.

She looked at Changsub. The softness of his gaze and the warmth of his hands comforted her and she breathed out slowly to steady herself before speaking.

"The director wanted us to switch the stage kisses to real ones, right before the performance was about to start." She said in a small voice.

"What! Why would she do that?" Changsub asked.

"She…she said it would be more impressive to show off for the recruiters."

"But that's too last minute to make such a big change!"

Chorong nodded.

"I know…I didn't want to do it because I knew you'd be watching and Sungjae and I hadn't done it in practice, but everyone else agreed to do it and I felt pressured…"

"That's so messed up…" Changsub shook his head.

Chorong looked down and continued the story.

"I thought I could just it up and do it but when the time came I got really anxious and Sungjae…he saw I wasn't comfortable so he used the thumb..."

She smiled sadly.

"He's really a good kid. I'm glad he did that but I should've done better and kept my composure." She finished.

"Wait really? I didn't even notice anything was wrong..." Changsub said in slight disbelief.

Chorong gave a hollow laugh.

"Well maybe most people in the audience didn't see it but I'm pretty sure a professional would've caught my character slip."

Changsub sighed and nodded slowly.

"So this is what you meant, when you said falling in love would get in the way of your acting."

Chorong didn't answer. She didn't blame him in the slightest but the statement wasn't wrong. She had after all allowed her emotional anxiety to slip through in that scene and it had probably cost her the casting opportunity.

"I'm sorry." Changsub said.

He hugged her tightly.

Chorong rested her head on his chest as he her hair. His hoodie was soft against her cheek and she relaxed a bit.

"Don't be sorry Changsub-ah." She whispered.

"Why didn't you tell me all of this sooner?" Changsub asked.

Chorong let out a soft sigh as she played with the string of Changsub's hoodie.

"A lot was happening that night and I was just glad to see you afterwards, and then things got busy with school and exams and I wasn't even thinking about the play anymore until Bomi told me about Eunji…"

She paused, feeling slightly guilty for her resentful thoughts.

"She's always so perfect…I don't think I'll ever be as good as her." She said. 

Changsub hugged her a bit tighter.

"Don't think like that. You're amazing as you are and the right chance will come for you someday." He said comfortingly.

Chorong twisted his hoodie string around her finger and nodded.

"Thanks…" She whispered.

She still felt a faint sense of self doubt inside her but she hoped his words were true.

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A/N  hmm the boys' new roommate who will it be ???