Looking around outside the engineering building, Soonyoung finally spotted the tall, dark male he was searching for. Luckily for him, one of the dance team members was in the same class with Jun so he knew the man’s schedule hence his presence in front of the foreign building right now. Walking slowly, not trying to attract any attention, he made way towards the beta. ‘Jun?’

The man turned towards him, gave him a smile, and turned back to his friends, as if it was not weird enough for Soonyoung to be there in the first place, let alone calling his name. Waiting a few seconds for Jun to excuse himself from the group, he soon realize the beta had no intention of doing so. Instead, he walked alongside his other friends with no regard of the shorter male at all. Frowning, he tried calling the man again, and this time, he caught his attention. ‘Sup?’

‘Hey. I-’

‘Listen, can we talk later? We’re in the middle of something right now, I don’t really have the time. Is it important?’ He glanced back at his other two friends a few time, showing his palm to signal them to wait. Disappointed, Soonyoung breathed, ‘Owh. No. Not really…’

He watched as Jun smiled briefly and ran back to join his group. As if he didn’t know he was avoiding him. It was so obvious. What was so important about going to a movie later that he didn’t even have a second to spare? He knew it yet he couldn’t force the man to stay…

Turning around, Soonyoung wondered who else he should ask. Beside Jun who he met a few times when he and Wonwoo were still flirting with each other, he never met the other member of his clique. And he really didn’t want to ask Jeonghan because eversince he was caught while on the way back after one of his heats last year, he could feel the slight tension between them. It could be completely unrelated but the older changed rooms last semester so they never talked as much since. It goes without saying how distance both of them were.

…but he was the only one he could ask. Though he was sure it would be weird because he suspect that the man was the reason for what was happening, but the timing was just, a bit ‘late’, if he really DID tell Wonwoo about him and Seokmin. A year too late to be exact.

Gathering all his courage to knock on the door on the end of the corridor, the quieter part of the dorm, Soonyoung squeezed the hem of his shirt a few times while waiting for Jeonghan to answer. The latter did, even offering him to come in but Soonyoung didn’t want to extend his stay longer than needed because he was sure the other was secretly judging him. Getting straight to the point, he kept his stare at the longer haired male and noticed the slight irritated look, maybe, he couldn’t tell. It was unreadable but that only meant he wasn’t comfortable with the question which was equivalent to irritation. Right?

Correct. Because Jeonghan told him to just give up. Apparently Wonwoo was ‘not the same’, whatever that meant. ‘He changed? What do you mean?’

Jeonghan just looked back at him, still bearing that unreadable expression. ‘You should forget him.’

‘What happened? Hyung!’ The man exhaled. Could it be…?

So it was because he found out about both of them. That was the only explanation. Why else would he ignore Soonyoung and went as far as to avoid him? Why else would his friends do the same? Why else would Jeonghan ask him to forget him?

Because Wonwoo was mad at him that was why. Because he thought Soonyoung was just like all the other omegas who sleep around. Because he found Soonyoung disgusting.

There was only one way he could found out about it.

Lifting his head, he glared at the older omega standing in front of him. His eyes were already vibrating, tears obviously threatening to fall down. ‘It’s you, right? You told him?? You told him about me and Seokmin??’

Jeonghan sighed which only managed to stir him up more. ‘It’s none of your business! You were sleeping around like I do! Everyone knows that! You have no right!’ Like nobody knew about the infamous Yoon Jeonghan who frequent clubs way before he was old enough to be in one, and sleep with any alpha who showed even the slightest interest in him. It was an open secret. No, it wasn’t even a secret since he bragged about it in his book.

‘Hey. Watch it. I-’

‘Who do you think you are?? You’re not even his friend. You’re just his friend’s mate.’ Jeonghan looked pissed but he didn’t care anymore. The man deserved what was coming when he told on him. He didn’t have the right. He didn’t.

Holding his sharp glare, Soonyoung backed away before finally turn to return to his room. ing bastard. He should have minded his own business. What made he think he could-??

‘.’ He breathed onto his pillow. It was so hard to breath, his nose was stuffed, his eyes blurry. Was this what they call heartbreak? His chest tightened so bad it physically hurt. Was it supposed to hurt like this?

‘AARRRRGHHH!!!’ He muffled his scream and turned to his side, wiping his tears but more flowed out. Returning to bury his face into the pillow, he brought his knees inside, hugging the pillow tight.

He just lost Wonwoo.

Wonwoo was the first guy who ever wanted to get to know him better. He was the first person who cared for him. He was the first person he ever felt comfortable with. The person who made his heart beat fast, butterflies in his stomach. He was everything Soonyoung ever wanted since the day he learned about mates. He wasn’t the perfect alpha he had hoped, but no one was perfect in the first place. What’s important was that he wasn’t someone who was interested in him just because he was an omega like any other alphas. That he wasn’t someone who pitied him because of his family like the kids in his hometown. Wonwoo wanted to know him because he was Soonyoung. He never cared about anything else.

And he just lost him.

Clenching his fist, Soonyoung search around for his phone to no avail. Where was it? It was supposed to be nearby. He got up from the bed and started to spill the content of his bag, shoving his pillows and blanket to the floor. ‘Where is it??’

He needed to hear it from the man himself. It wasn’t over yet. He was just testing Soonyoung. He was not the kind to leave someone hanging. He needed to call him. He needed to call Wonwoo.

Ah. He forgot he changed his phone. It was on the desk all along. Quickly grabbing the bigger phone, he looked at his call history and dialed Wonwoo’s number for the umpteenth time. ‘Pick up… pick-’

Out-of-reach again. He was still blocked…

Wonwoo really hated him.

He hated him. Not because of his family. Not because of his past.

Wonwoo hated Kwon Soonyoung.

Unable to hold his cry anymore, Soonyoung started to wail. This was too much for him.

Why?? Nobody left Yura even when she slept around. Seungcheol stuck with Jeonghan eventhough he slept with countless people. Nobody said anything about Bam Bam and Jun who would change partner almost every night. He only slept with Seokmin! He only slept with one person!! Why would Wonwoo do this to him??

Why??

*****

Seokmin played with the menu, flipping it over and over again, waiting for Soonyoung to came. He was actually quite excited, seeing that this was the first time Soonyoung agreed to meet, or eat together, like a date, in campus. He knew things were bad between the man and his rival, and it seemed to really affect his fox so he wanted to cheer him up. And, if there was any good timing, maybe confess his feelings again. He never expected Soonyoung to suggest the cafe at the medic department though.

This felt really weird. They were used to meeting in secret unless in groups so he was still cautious of his surrounding. his dry lips, he took a sip of his water and turned up to look at the entrance. There was still no sign of the omega… Maybe he was too early? He looked at his watch and back in front of him. Soonyoung was late. Just as he was about to take his phone out, he saw someone closing up towards the table on the corner of his eyes. ‘Sorry. I got lost.’

Smiling as bright as he could, he shook his head and handed the menu over to the sullen man. Soonyoung didn’t look good. His eyes were puffy but not too much that it altered his look, just enough for the alpha to know things were bad. Scratching his head as he tried to ignore the gloomy aura, he cut down on his excitement and gently recommended a few things on the menu, his voice low. He saw the small smile on omega and did the same.

They didn’t say anything while waiting. Just a few catching up, on studies. He didn’t know how bad things were so he didn’t dare to touch on the subject. Other subjects were not that interesting for the other, and it was not an appropriate atmosphere to make random jokes so Seokmin was out of wit. He never felt this awkward in a while. It was not as if he was the only one trying, Soonyoung tried to start the conversation too, but he didn’t react the way he usually do so needless to say, the conversation quickly died down. Not wanting to eat in silence, Seokmin turned to commenting on the dish, how good it taste, and Soonyoung did the same, but there was only so many words they could use before both were out.

Seokmin finished his dish and was about to open the menu to order something else to fill his time before he saw the omega putting down his utensils and rubbed his face, looking upset. ‘Are you okay-?’

‘You wanna know? Why I didn’t have any friends?’ He frowned at the sudden question. Lifting his head up to see the omega looking empty, he felt a bit disturbed. ‘It’s cus my mom left my dad for my uncle.’

‘That’s…’ He didn’t know what to say right now. He couldn’t read Soonyoung, which side he was standing. Did he hate his mom more? Or did he hate the villagers more? Or both? ‘People make mistakes….’

‘You wanna know why the villagers hate me so much? Cus both my mom and uncle’s are omegas. And they took me with them and raised me for a few years.’ Seokmin realized he went pale at that because his head felt really light right now. He wasn’t expecting something like this to be said in a cafe, during one of their ‘date’. Not that he was upset, the revelation was just too much for his to process when it was just thrown at him so suddenly. ‘And I have a delta sister. You know delta? Of course you don’t. They’re not allowed to live.’

‘Soonyoung-ah.’ he gulped. This was really too much for him. What was with the omega right now? Why? Was he kidding? Was he really telling the truth? If so, what triggered him to spill everything right now? They were not drinking, they were in public place. It was so out of character.

He read about the fourth kind once. It is rare for the inseminated egg to stick to the uterus, even if it did, most delta pregnancy produce stillborn or defected babies. It is almost impossible for a perfect delta to be born without any physical retardation. Even if there is one… ‘She’s a psycho. She killed the neighbourhood pets. I basically raised her because my mom was mentally sick!! I raised a psycho!!’

‘Soonyoung!’ Seokmin growled at the now agitated man.

‘What? Too much to handle? Why don’t you just leave me then? Like all of them.’ Soonyoung suddenly raised his voice, catching the eyes of the few people around them. ‘I don’t need you people! I’m fine being alone. Don’t pretend to like me and-, and leave…’

Getting up, Seokmin walked beside the omega and pulled his head towards his body, hiding his crying face from display. ‘I’m crazy. That’s why they hate me.’

Caressing his hair and hugging him tight, Seokmin placed some money on the table and pulled Soonyoung out of the cafe with him, towards the nearby park. They just stood there, the crying man silently sobbing in the embrace of the alpha. ‘Why do they hate me so much? What did I do?’

Silence. He really needed time to think about the answer because he had none. The answer to the question that had been bothering him since Soonyoung asked him back in Jeju. What did his fox ever did to deserve this kind of treatment? What he heard a few minutes earlier was not enough to justify his isolation. Not even one bit.. ‘Why me? Everyone did the same thing I did. Why me??’

‘I don’t hate you.’

‘You don’t know me.’

‘I know you have a mental mom and a psycho sister.’ Yes. He now know and he didn’t hate the man in front of him. He didn’t think his feeling lessen. In fact, he think he liked him more since he had been through a lot and survived.

Soonyoung pushed himself out of the embrace and wiped away his tears. ‘We should stop seeing each other.’

‘What?’ Did he just heard right? Why? Did he say something wrong? . 'I was just joking. I didn’t mean to call them crazy!’

He held on to the omega who was leaving, ‘I only wanted to lift the mood.’

‘Soonyoung wait!’

It was useless. The man left without even looking back.

*****

Seokmin pushed the door open and jumped on the bed, joining the other alpha who was studying for tomorrow’s class. Mingyu was taking notes on the technical terms in Korean, writing the meaning in a foreign language. The larger alpha, who happened to be his childhood friend, returned to Korea after years abroad and was roomed right next to him, replacing Bam Bam. After half a year alone, he finally had someone to share his problems with, his ‘love’ problems. The only thing was, Mingyu was not someone who cares about these kinds of stuff, despite him being a alpha like Bam Bam; except Mingyu had a kink for betas, while Bam Bam was just a for omegas.

‘Mingyu-ahhhh!!!’ he flailed around, annoying his friend who finally threw his notepad and pencil away, glaring at him while sighing. Seokmin proceeded to tell him about what happened, not minding the bored expression on the other who only replied out of duty. ‘What should I do?? I think he’s really mad…’

‘Who? Performance art guy?’ Mingyu replied unenthusiastically while balancing a pen on his mouth. Not hearing a word of reply, he finally looked over to see Seokmin staring sharply back at him, making his heart stop for a moment. ‘Jesus!’ He sighed, ‘Aren’t you guys good?’  

Didn’t he just tell him everything for the last ten minutes? Seriously, this guy. Not even bothered to pretend he cared. He was lucky Seokmin needed a friend or he would have left the man alone. Though he was sure it wouldn’t affect the taller alpha since he seemed like a lone wolf in the first place. Giving up, he got straight to the point. ‘I said something I shouldn’t. He’s mad.’

‘Just wait till his heat. He’ll find you.’ Mingyu stared at Seokmin, the latter too baffled by the answer to keep his mouth shut. How the hell could the man say something like that with a straight face? Not even a dirty, teasing smile? He was expecting an awkward laugh any moment now...

Nope. He was serious.

That confident. Wow. Just wow. As expected from a noble who’s always surrounded by omegas. Wait for his heat? Wait for Soonyoung to be desperate enough for him?? He would have to wait for an eternity!! ‘He’s not like that! He won’t come just because.’

‘Then why don’t you just call him or something to apologize.’

‘I couldn’t reach him.’

‘Geez. Korean omegas are so dramatic. Who acts like that these days?’ Seokmin was about to defend the omega before realizing something. Sighing, he turned his body to look at the ceiling. He was talking to Mingyu, not Bam Bam. The alpha has a thing against omegas, he wouldn’t care about the reason. He wouldn’t try to plan something crazy like the Thai alpha. But… maybe that was what he needed right now. Because he was doing the crazy thinking all by himself, any weird suggestions like those from Bam Bam, and he would’ve agreed without any second thoughts. At least, with Mingyu, he was calm enough to think straight. ‘He didn’t have a good past.’

Mingyu looked at him and shrugged. He was obviously not interested in the topic anymore. Already getting up to move to the desk, he patted Seokmin’s shoulder gently. ‘Why don’t you try other omegas then? You’re only stuck with him cus he’s the only one you tasted. Loosen up a bit. Have fun. He’ll just be another omega.’

That was an advice he never heard in a long time. But somehow, coming from Mingyu, it didn’t seem as annoying. Maybe it was the lack of giddiness in his voice, or the mischievous grin which made what he said seem normal. He knew Mingyu had lots of experience, and that it was normal for them overseas where people are more open about it, but it was still a taboo to talk about it out loud here in Korea, or in Asia in general, which was why there was people like Bam Bam who gets overly excited everytime the subject came up. That being said, coming from the noble, that didn’t seem like a bad idea at all.

‘You’re a future doctor with a nice scent. Any omega would want you. Don’t limit your choices man.’ With that, Mingyu grabbed his coat and went out to get himself a soda, leaving Seokmin alone to stare at the closet.

There was truth in that. There were many omegas who tried to get his number without success because he was a shy and picky alpha who only had his eyes on Soonyoung. Though he really love the fox’s small and sharp features, he had to admit Soonyoung was not the best-looking omega out there. Adorable, but not the best. He was also a very complex person with a very complicated past in comparison to his other suitors. At least, they seemed less difficult.

Frankly speaking, anyone could easily top him. Anytime.

But it had to be his fox. Because Seokmin love seeing how hard the omega work to get recognition he knew he deserve. And he loves that face he makes when he finally feel belonged.

Was he really too desperate? Should he give himself a chance with other omegas? Soonyoung obviously didn’t want anything to do with him right now. The man was too preoccupied with his ‘lover’ who was treating him like . But if that was what he wanted, Seokmin had no say. Because he tried. And Soonyoung made his choice.

…he should just try one more time. Just one more time.

*****

‘It’s okay. Let’s just talk.’ Seokmin announced to himself on the railing, trying to convince himself about his plan. Mingyu was right. He had been doing a lot for Soonyoung but it was never enough. There was nothing more he could do when Soonyoung just kept pushing him away. It was fine at the beginning but it was too much for him right now. His feelings got deeper but the man never even bothered to consider him as someone more than a friend, and that hurt. He thought they were making progress but apparently he was wrong.

It didn’t just feel bad, he felt awful. To the point where he even doubted his self-worth, whether he was no better than an ignorant jerk who treat people like trash. Why was he lower than that bastard?

Mingyu was right. He was a future doctor. He was not bad-looking, he has a good scent. He was definitely better than whoever the beta was. At least, in terms of satisfying omegas, alphas do it better than betas, so there was that. And not to mention, Soonyoung never slept with the guy so he also have that.

That’s right. He should just say what he needed, and if the omega still think he was not worth leaving his boyfriend for, he should just leave. He should give himself a chance with other omegas. Another omega who wants him as much as he wants them.

Pushing himself on his two feet, Seokmin walked inside the building, waiting for the class to end to catch Soonyoung. He gave the man about a few days to cool himself so he should be able to think straight. Although, he still couldn’t reach Soonyoung on the phone, and the latter deactivated his Facebook account so there was no other way than to come to him like this.

It was very uncomfortable, hearing the instructor’s voice echoing from outside the studio like this. He peeked inside a few times but the class was still ongoing. He could see the students, including his omega all sweaty, breathing heavily as they heard the closing speech. Everything was so different from his own lecturea which consist of the lecturers teaching in front, and them taking notes.

After more than ten minutes, the door finally opened and the students got out one by one. Seokmin waited for Soonyoung to greet him but the man was nowhere to be seen. Looking inside again, he saw him just sitting there, staring into space with his head leaning against the mirror, other students already left. Deciding it was okay for him to enter, he called out the man’s name.

‘What are you doing here?’

‘To talk. We need to talk.’

‘About what?’

Seokmin took a seat beside him and did a good 180 around the studio, commenting on some little stuff to ease the tension. Soonyoung was still staring at nothing, taking his towel to wipe off his sweat once in a while, not minding about the other’s presence. ‘So are we over?’

Soonyoung didn’t say a word, only opening his water bottle to hydrate himself. Seeing the man trying to avoid the question, he continued bitterly, ‘You guys made up? Is that why?’ The tired man looked at him, eyes a bit wide. Figuring it was because his cover was blown, Seokmin snorted, ‘I’m not that stupid. You’re not gonna say that just because of my stupid comment on your family.’ He glanced back at the man who had his head down in shame. ‘So? Did he finally agreed to touch you?’

The omega didn’t seem to like the comment but he still refused to say anything. He did, choke a bit while drinking, trying hard to control his cough. Seokmin took that as a yes, that he was just to embarrassed to say it. ‘Congrats then. So you have no use for me. No wonder.’

‘No-’

‘No, it’s okay. Totally fine. I mean we’re just ‘special friends’, right?’ He did the quotation mark with his fingers, ‘Bam Bam’s right. Shouldn’t have had my hopes up. You could have said it up front though. Why did you have to get all emotional with all the ‘everybody hates me’ . Not cool.’

He was about to leave the place before Soonyoung finally turned to face him. However, it was too much for him to look at the omega right now so he continued his steps towards the door. ‘Dokyeom, no. It’s not. We broke- He- Dokyeom!’

‘We broke up!’ Stopping his legs, the alpha turned to look at the other who still sat on the floor, facing him. ‘He made it clear he didn’t want anything to do with me.’

Wait. This was confusing. So they broke up, then Soonyoung wanted to cut off all contacts with him. Why? Because the thrill of cheating was gone? Damnit Dokyeom. Soonyoung was not that kind of person! All these talks with Bam Bam was really messing up his mind. ‘So what are we? Still friends? Cus you said-’

‘I meant it. Let’s stop seeing each other.’ Closing his eyes, trying to make sense of the situation, Seokmin tilted his head a bit, as if he could hear things better by doing so. Because it really didn’t make any sense. ‘Why?’

‘He found out about us.’

Owh. That, he understood. He admit what they were doing was not acceptable for someone in a serious relationship with another. Had it been under a different circumstances that is. It was not as if he was saying he did the right thing by introducing Soonyoung to their messed up friendship, because the omega could survive his heats alone, but he did something right because Soonyoung seemed a lot happier with him. The man himself should know that. ‘So you… you’re expecting him to come back?’

‘It was a mistake. I deserve it. But I can fix things.’

‘How the hell are you gonna fix things when he’s blocking you? Did you guys meet? Did you even talk to him after the break??’

‘No…’

‘Heol…’ Breathing a disbelieved sigh, Seokmin looked up to the ceiling. Was he still hoping for the childish jerk to make up with him in this situation? In his dreams. ‘He’s obviously done with you, don’t you think?’

‘No! He just need time to cool down… He’s not irrational.’

this. ‘Why does it have to be him?’ Soonyoung furrowed his eyebrows at the question, unsure of the answer. ‘I’m here. I like you. Why does it have to be him?’

‘We’re not over yet!’ Clenching his teeth, Seokmin stared at the omega who was doing the same to him. He was never in the picture. It had always just been the omega and his lover…

‘Was I not enough? I did more than he ever did for you.’

‘You don’t know that.’

‘You told me that.’ Seokmin sneered, finally fed up with the whole situation. A year was enough. He shouldn’t do this to himself anymore, it was not healthy. This was obviously going nowhere. He should cut the hook off before he got addicted to the point of hurting himself. ‘Maybe you should try to remember what I did for you all this time. What you said to me. Cus I'm here. And I was there for you. You were happy.’

‘I could still be happy. With him.’

‘Good luck with that.’ Giving the man one last sarcastic smile, Seokmin turned away and left.

This was it. He should find his own happiness then.

To be continued…

DRAMA!! Hoshi’s really messed up there ^^;; But he was raised in a bit of a messed up situation so he was just holding on to the first person who treat him good. Mistakes are made…

AND!!! DK finally had it!! God he finally exploded O_O

Gaaa!!! I dunno what to say bout this chapter!! I’m just gonna leave this here to be judged. *hides in the corner*

As always, thank you for always commenting and supporting this fic!!! It’s already a lot of chapters already, it’s amazing how you guys still read it ^^;; Really appreciate it! Love you guys so much!!!