He was having trouble breathing. His hands were locked to tightly, pushing his ribcage and blocking his lungs which caused Seokmin to gasp for air in shock. ‘Soonyoung-ah.’ He called gently, not really wanting to force the man to wake up, just enough for him to react and loosen his hug. With nothing happening in the next few second, Seokmin gritted his teeth and tried to use his own hands to pull the other’s grip apart. That only caused the man to squeeze him more. ‘Soonyoung-ah, I can’t breath.’

‘I’m dying here. Hoshi-yah.’ Still nothing. One thing left to do then, ‘uuUUUKKHH!!’

As he wanted, the omega finally let go of his hold…

…and proceeded to hug his neck instead, bringing them close to his own so he can hide his face in between. ‘Yah yah! Choking.’ Hitting Soonyoung’s hips a few times for a time out, Seokmin sat up and leaned against the headboard the moment he was free, taking in all the air he could to fill his lungs. It was still dark so he couldn’t really see anything but he noticed the mop of hair on the half body beside him, the owner’s face not quite visible. Smiling, not really sure why the man just randomly decided to play around in the middle of the night, Seokmin messed with his hair. It wasn’t his wave yet so this was a bit odd, since Soonyoung would usually sleep soundly after their little ‘exercise’.

‘Soon-’ The omega slithered towards him and hugged his waist. Climbing on the younger male, delightfully surprising him, Soonyoung hid his face on Seokmin’s chest. ‘Wae? What’s wrong?’

A shake.

‘It’s not your wave yet. Are you still ? Aak!’ He felt a weak and lazy slap on his mouth, the omega’s hand resting there, all comfortable as Soonyoung casually poke two fingers inside his mouth. And no, it was not the ‘ual, prepare me’ kind of thing. It was the ‘I love to poke my fingers everywhere’ kind of thing and it meant the omega will not move them around. He just parked them there because he could. Shaking his head to loose the fingers, Seokmin laughed as Soonyoung wiped his wet fingers on the alpha’s shoulder.

Everything was calm.

Everything felt right.

Humming some songs softly to fill the silence, Seokmin played with the black hair, caressing it once in a while, enjoying the rare moments of peace with the omega. Though they were already used to each other’s touch, the only times he gets to be intimate with Soonyoung were during his heat, and most of those times would be spent on the bed, getting it on. When not desperate for the alpha, Soonyoung would be playing games or stuff his face with food, sometimes when he gets emotional, he would cry and spill his heart out to Seokmin. Aside from sleep, there was never really peace. Which was not necessarily a bad thing.

Just… Seokmin loves to cuddle. He loves to touch the omega without any ual intention but to show his affection. He loves to have the omega rest in his arms for warmth and comfort rather than to satisfy his cravings. They never really do that, not after Daejeon. Not after they agreed to be nothing more than special friends. Because -friends don’t bear feelings for each other. That was the agreement. He was the one who suggested it so he had to accept it. That being said, it didn’t mean he gave up on what he wanted to do. He only had to do it without the other noticing so Seokmin would try to wake up early during the week of Soonyoung’s heat when they would share a bed, and enjoy the few minutes of snuggle before the omega wakes up and go on with his day.

It was pathetic, he knew, but he was happy. Soonyoung was starting to show some signs that he might be interested. Just a bit of hope was all he needed to keep holding on.

Wrapping his right hand over Soonyoung’s back to pull him closer, Seokmin frowned, puzzled as he felt something flowing down his chest. It was already wet from tears. Although curious, the alpha decided it was best to stay quiet, giving the man above him space to cry. Less than a minute later, Soonyoung finally spoke, ‘Dokyeom-ah… Am I annoying?’

‘The most annoying.’

‘I see…’

‘Yah… I’m just kidding. You’re the least annoying people I’ve ever met.’ How could someone find Soonyoung annoying in the first place? He would most of the time only mind his own business but gets along really well with others. He is sweet and helpful, don’t like gossips and is always mindful of others. He has a cute face with a warm expression most of the time. Nobody would have guess what he have to go through each time he goes back home just based on his cheeky personality. Why would anyone think he’s annoying? Of course, compared to his other crazy friends and parents, Soonyoung was anything but one. ‘You don’t stand out enough to be one.’

‘Is that good?’

‘Really good.’ The grip on his forearm tightened as the omega snuggled closer and Seokmin simpered to himself, loving the softness of the other’s hair rubbing on his chin as he moved around. Soonyoung laid still, breathing softly before he continued, ‘Am I clingy?’

‘Only when you’re .’ He answered without thinking which earned him another weak slap, this time the fingers entered his nostril. Laughing at the silly antic, he grab hold of the naughty hand and bit it, just enough for the older to pull it back towards himself. ‘Nah… you should be clingier.’

‘Don’t people hate that?’ Seokmin thought he heard the voice stuck in his throat but let it off as his tired voice.

‘Not me. I like clingy Hoshi.’ he wrapped his hands around Soonyoung’s waist to pull the man closer. No matter how much their body was touching each other, it was still not enough. He needed more. He wanted them to be so tightly close he could drown. He wanted Soonyoung to hold onto him as hard as he do the other. He wanted Soonyoung to be jealous just like he do. He wanted Soonyoung to think about him everyday just like him. To want to be with him 24 hours a day, to want to listen to his voice every minute of the hour, to want to touch and hold him every second… He wanted Soonyoung to be clingy. He wanted Soonyoung to claim him. To tie him down and never let go.

Deep in thoughts, Seokmin twitched a bit as he felt a wet sensation on his chest. That was when he heard muffled stuffed breaths coming from the object of his affection. ‘Hey…What’s wrong?’

‘Why do people ignore me?’ His caressing hand stopped, caught off-guard by the question. Was he referring to the villagers? Because he didn’t know how to answer that question, and he didn’t know what he should say to make the man feel better about himself. Because no matter what he say tonight, the man would still feel like when he return to his hometown surrounded by those people. Was he expecting a real answer? Or was he just being emotional because their trip was coming to an end? ‘Am I not important?’

‘You-...’ Seokmin sighed. What triggered that ridiculous thought? What caused him to cry like this in the middle of the night? Switching on the side lamp to look at the other male, he laid back down to pull Soonyoung, who already had his back towards him to hide his face, back into his embrace. ‘You’re-’

‘He’s blocked me. We were fine a few weeks ago.’ Soonyoung was sobbing hard. It was him. ‘He just, he just suddenly stop replying.’ A hiccup, ‘And I tried to call him. He-he blocked me.’ he was shaking so badly right now, every breath he took caused his back to his Seokmin’s chest from the pressure. Looking down towards the floor, Seokmin saw the omega’s flip phone, the battery out of the device, as if it was thrown. No, Seokmin was sure it was thrown towards the wall or the floor. Frowning, the calmer of the two kissed the top of the other’s head, wanting to show he cared. To tell him that he was there for him. ‘What did I do? Dokyeom, what did I do? Why?’

He turned Soonyoung to face him and pulled his face to his neck, amplifying his pheromone to calm the distressed man. The beta was lucky Seokmin didn’t know who he was because he was at his limit right now. He might be a gentle nerd, but he swear he could kill the man right now and wouldn’t regret it.

*****

Seokmin looked at the overly happy omega who was half-hopping towards the exit of the airport. The very next morning after his breakdown, the man suddenly became very passionate in bed the rest of his heat, even seeking intimacy after it ended. Though that was what Seokmin had always wanted, it didn’t feel right. It was just like the feeling he felt when he first tricked Soonyoung to sleep with him back in Daejeon - guilt. Because he knew he was taking advantage of the other and yet, he couldn’t resist the temptation.

The bus ride saw Soonyoung staring at the scenery outside, face void of any emotion, tired of pretending the whole day. Seokmin faked sleep, peeking once in a while to monitor the man beside him. With his phone broken from the impact, Soonyoung decided to let it stay like that. At least, with no phone, he wouldn’t stress about the beta not contacting him anymore, pretending it was because the man simply couldn’t do so. It made him feel better. It was a solution.

‘I’ll meet you at the park at three?’ Seokmin confirmed their plan again, to make sure the other didn’t forget. He was supposed to send Soonyoung back, still pretending he lived in the neighbouring city. The journey takes at least two hours so they did not have any time to waste.

‘I’m thinking of taking the bus back...’

‘Owh. Are you sure? It’s better for me to send you right?’ He refused to let the man go back alone. A month without him, without being able to hear his voice since his phone is broken, he should take all the chance he have to be with the omega. Also, the man gets depress on the journey back so him being around might help him cheer up. However, Soonyoung only smiled weakly back at him which answered his question. ‘I see… Okay.’

‘My grandpa might go all crazy and chase you with his big fork. He’s crazy.’ Soonyoung whispered the last part, making the alpha laugh through his nose. Sighing in defeat, not wanting to force the man to do anything he was not comfortable to, Seokmin made the other promise to let him send him to the bus stop, the very least he could do.

*****

He leaned back against the headrest, watching the bus disappear from sight as it took the left turn. Taking a deep breath, Seokmin closed his eyes, relaxing his mind. He his lips, contemplating whether to consult his friend in Thailand. The man was right, he didn’t feel good being in this kind of relationship anymore. He thought he was missing the chance because Soonyoung was already taken but he realized that even if they break up, Soonyoung would still only see him as nothing more than a -friend.

They shared everything lovers would, more than the omega ever shared with his beta boyfriend, but the man’s presence was still bigger than him. He destroyed Soonyoung’s trip just by neglecting him, even after all the effort Seokmin put into planning it. It took Soonyoung less than a week to break down from being ignored by the beta, while it took him about thrice of the time to even contact Seokmin after he did the same thing during orientation.

Where did he go wrong? Why wasn’t he enough? He did more for Soonyoung than his so-called boyfriend every did!

Clicking his tongue in annoyance, Seokomin started the engine and made his way to the nearest bar. He needed a drink.

He was really starting to hate the beta. The ing beta.

*****

Soonyoung rest his head on the floor, staring at his phone. Somehow he managed to only damage the battery so his phone was still usable, as long as he kept it charged. The moment he took the wire off, the screen went black. He should be able to get working per usual with a new battery.

… What was the point. Nobody would contact him anyway.

Pulling the wire out of the socket, he left the broken device on the floor and climbed onto his bed to get to his laptop instead. As always, he watched some videos from his favourite dancers but he was not in the mood to dance or choreograph anything right now. The dances were great, but nothing inspired him, nothing motivated him. Everything was just… meaningless moving pictures.

Closing the tab, he stared at his bookmarks, opening them one-by-one, trying to get himself excited for something. The manga he was following was too complicated to understand with his distracted mind so that was out. He didn’t want to learn Japanese right now, and he didn’t want to watch any anime either. Maybe read some horror story? Nope. His house is literally surrounded by an orchard, and ghosts live in trees. He might scare himself. Facebook…

Soonyoung gulped. He was nervous. What if he opened it and realized Wonwoo deleted him, or blocked him there too? It would be too much for him to handle. But still… he was curious. No, he was desperate to hear from the man. Anything would do. Any update would do. If Wonwoo deleted him, he would get the point. He will leave him alone.

Crossing his heart, he typed in the man’s name in the search window, biting his upper lip as he click on the name.

There was no update. The last one was two days after their last date which was three weeks ago. Wonwoo still replied to his messages, joking around with him up until last two weeks. No warning, no nothing. He just stopped.

Not satisfied with the situation, he searched for the man’s best friends’ pages. He knew Jun didn’t have one, Wonwoo always complained about people adding him just to stalk Jun, but his other friends all have their own page. Starting with the oldest, Soonyoung was disappointed to find the same lack of update on Seungcheol’s page. And Hansol’s. The young alpha stopped updating both his Facebook and Twitter two weeks ago. At least he knew the Wonwoo had fun in some bar near campus before he finally decided to cut contacts. He didn’t know what to feel about that though, it wasn’t frustration, it wasn’t disappointment either.

It was confusion, desperation.

He wanted to know what happened after. What made Wonwoo stop caring.

Minghao! The youngest beta love to update his social networks. He had all kinds of pages, there was no way that kind of guy would stop updating!

…The hell? What was wrong with them? All of them stopped updating! Was he being blocked by all four of them? Was that why he couldn’t see any updates anymore? Is that how blocking works?? Was this some kind of sick joke? Some kind of childish play? Bullying maybe? Why?

Wait. There was still Jeonghan. His senior loves to post some random stuffs and pictures on his page so he might find something there.

Clicking the ‘X’ button repeatedly out of frustration, irritated to see the date of the last update on the older omega’s page, Soonyoung slammed his laptop close and lied on the bed, taking deep breaths to calm himself down.

Bastard. Stupid bastard.

He tried to be positive about the situation like thinking that the group was travelling overseas to somewhere with no internet or phone service but that was not the case. Wonwoo said he was supposed to be back to his hometown right about now.

Could it be… that Wonwoo knew about him and Seokmin and got mad at him?

. That was not possible. They took great precautions! And they didn’t met anyone they knew in Jeju, they couldn’t have stumbled upon anyone there! Besides, since he and Wonwoo never made their ‘relationship’ official, the only ones who knew about them were Wonwoo’s pack and Jeonghan, and all of them were supposed to go back to their hometowns.

Unless…

Jeonghan…

*****

It had already been a few days and Seokmin still couldn’t reach the omega. Soonyoung didn’t log into his page, and he couldn’t be reached through his phone either.

It was worrisome. Really worrisome. Soonyoung said he didn’t like being back home because he had nothing to do and always had to avoid going to town unless he really needed to because he hated the villagers. After what just happened with the beta, Seokmin worry that the man might break. Soonyoung has a fragile heart after all, no matter how tough he always tried to appear to be.

Was he okay?

Feeling restless, he unlocked his phone and dialed the fox’s number, puffing his cheeks while waiting for the result. His phone was still unreachable, he had yet to fix it. Should he just buy Soonyoung a new phone? The omega really likes taking pictures and playing games on his phone so he would be really happy to get a smartphone. That might cheer him up.

But… He might think Seokmin was looking down on him for having a cheap phone. And that would be the end of him.

Gosh, he needed another drink. He really needed one.

Forget it. He needed something healthier. He was going to go for a drink with his friend later tonight anyway.

Grabbing his duffle bag, Seokmin threw it into the car and started the engine. Distracting himself with exercise was the better choice. He needed to build muscles because, Soonyoung.

*****

‘Is that still not working?’ Soonyoung looked up from his laptop towards his grandfather who had his stiff face, as always. The man was looking at his phone which he kept close to him for whatever reason, before turning back towards his newspaper. Smiling at the old man’s effort to look like he didn’t care, Soonyoung replied monotonously, ‘I’ll get it fixed later.’

‘Just use smartphones like everyone else.’ The elder cleared his throat awkwardly and got up. ‘I’m going to now. Don’t just sit there being lazy all the time.’ Pouting to himself, Soonyoung ignored the comment and continued to play with his laptop until he heard the door closed. Then, he made an annoyed face to his grandmother who was still eating at the dining table.

‘He’s not planning to buy me one right? You need to stop him.’ The wrinkled woman just laughed at both her men’s continuous pretense of hatred. Not getting any reply, Soonyoung muttered complaints to himself while searching for the types of smartphones on the internet. ‘I’m going to buy one anyway. Don’t let him do it. He’s going to choose a lame one.’

He heard his grandmother laughed, the gentle laughter, before clicking on the page to compare prices. His jaw dropped.

Damn. This thing costs a lot! Where the hell was he going to get the money? Everything already went to the Jeju trip! But he already said he was going to buy one! There was no way he was going to ask his old folks for money. No way.

Unless… No. He was not going to touch that money. He was planning to return everything to his dad without touching a penny. But… he can just return the money he used later and the man wouldn’t notice a thing. Urgh, just the thought of that really hurt his pride.

‘You have money to buy one?’

‘Yes.’ He heard the lady hummed, laughing at his ego as she went to grab something from a drawer and placed it on the table. It was a box. ‘I told you… Harabeoji. Arghh.’

‘It’s not harabeoji.’ Soonyoung was about to ask about it before it clicked. Exhaling a disappointed sigh, he turn his face away from the box without even looking at the content. As a respond to his reaction, his grandmother did the same thing. ‘He bought it last year. It’s an old model.’

Saddened by the usual lack of respond, she continued, ‘He’s been calling to ask about you.’

‘I know.’

‘You didn’t answer his calls?’

‘I don’t have anything to talk about.’ He could sense that she was about to lecture him again and quickly continued, ‘I know. I’ll talk when I’m ready.’

‘Just accept it. You need it anyway. Why waste money.’ Tightening his jaws from defeat, he opened the box and looked at the black phone and the small card congratulating him for entering university. Somehow that pissed him off. He didn’t know why but he was irritated just looking at the handwritten note. Such useless attempt to make it up to him after all these years.

‘He came here last month to visit your mom.’ Soonyoung stopped his steps towards the stairs. The man was here again. He never understood the man. She betrayed him, he moved on to marry another omega in her absence, and now he was back visiting her in the hospital. Why? To laugh at her face? What was the point? Just be happy with his new family and stop trying so hard already. It was getting so annoying. No wonder she left him.

‘And he left you something. In your drawer.’ Must be another addition to add into his collection of unopened letters. Entering his room, he jumped on the bed to stare at the new phone. What great timing. He didn’t want to use it but he needed a phone and he had no money. It wouldn’t hurt him to accept the gift this one time. Just this once. He’ll just pay the man back later, along with all his money in the bank.

Agreeing with the idea, Soonyoung looked around for the pocket to put the SIM card in. The size was very different which meant he would have to buy a new one, but it wouldn’t cost as much as a new phone so it was still affordable. Smiling to himself, Soonyoung pulled his old phone to text someone about it but it was wiped away as soon as he noticed the black screen. He forgot about it.

Suddenly curious to see if Wonwoo tried to contact him all this time he switched off his phone, Soonyoung connected his flip phone to the charger and switched it on. There were a few missed calls.

Getting excited from the notification, Soonyoung pushed the OK button as quick as lightning, his heart beating quickly as he waited for the phone to load completely.

Owh.

It was Seokmin.

To be continued…

Drama!!! DK didn’t want to be just another friend anymore and things are already starting to mess with him! And Hoshi… things were just too sudden it caught him off-guard. He already had social anxiety to begin with so it really affected him T_T

Sorry there wasn’t any naughty scene this chapter :3 I’m bad at lemons… Ohohohooo!! I’ll write it again when the time is right! *cough*whenseokminismuscularenough*cough*

And can I just say, Jeonghan and DK is just too cute together! (In a hyung/dongsaeng kinda relationship. I don’t ship them any other way)

Anyway, enough rambling! Thank you for reading an supporting the fic guys!!! And commenting too! As always!!! I LOVE YOU GUYSSS!!! <3<3