Hyuna’s POV

“Hyuna, let’s take a selca!” Dong Woon tapped my shoulder and made me smile in front of the camera. I smiled at him for the photo and went back to looking outside the window.

The airplane was landing soon and I did not catch any sleep even though I had a few hours before reaching the sunny island of Singapore. The BEAST members and I managed to catch the plane without being late to set off for MAMA 2011. It was held in Singapore this year and I was not looking forward to it.

Hyun Seung and I wrapped up the filming of the music video and managed to catch a few hours of sleep before boarding but we were still exhausted. Not to mention, I found out about Hyun Seung’s feelings for me and he actually did not listen to what I had to say before anything.

“But Hyun Seung… Listen to m-“

 “I understand. If I were to make a choice right now, I would rather we will not get together.”

 “You mean… you don’t want to get together with me?”

“Yes, I don’t.”

I remembered his words clearly. He did not want to get together with me even though I had found out about his feelings for me. I had wanted to answer him that it was possible if things turned out well but he rejected me straight away. Somehow, I felt hurt by his words. I did not know whether it was normal for me to feel this way. The way he rejected my feelings was like thousands of needles piercing through my heart.  

I turned my head to see Hyun Seung at the other row of the plane. He was soundly asleep with his sunglasses on and I sighed deeply, “Hyun Seung, you’re confusing my heart right now. Why is that so?”

In front of Hyun Seung’s seat, Jun Hyung was also sleeping. As usual, he looked mesmerising – even when he slept. I stared at him and dropped my head down to look at my feet, “Why is love so complicated?”

I searched for a paper and wrote down my feelings for my kangaroo from Hyun Seung.

My heart is confused and unhappy. Hyun Seung and Jun Hyung…

Who does my heart belongs to?

Most importantly, does it matter?

Hyun Seung’s POV

“Hyuna and BEAST, it’s your turn.” The staff called for us and we hurried to the stage for our rehearsals.

First, I had my rehearsal with the BEAST members. We would be singing Fiction in Orchestra version. It was easy as the first part, we only had to stand and sing. The dancing would come in after Hyuna’s and my mini performance as a teaser for our sub-unit ‘Troublemaker’.

Occasionally, I would turn and check on Hyuna who was sitting alone at a corner while she waited for us to finish rehearsing. She looked dejected. Maybe she was completely occupied in her own world. I could not tell whether she was feeling sad or happy. She was hard to read nowadays.

“Hyun Seung!”

“Yes?”

“Please call Hyuna over. We’re starting your rehearsal now.” The staff informed me.

I called Hyuna over and she seemed to be a little distracted.

“Now, Hyuna and Hyun Seung, you have rehearsed this before. The most important part is the ‘fake kiss’ scene. Hyun Seung, your lips would slide across her hand without contact and your lips have to go closely to hers to make it seem like you two almost kiss. Is that understood?” The staff reminded us again.

“Yes, sir.” Both of us nodded and got ready in our positions. It was exactly like the dance choreography for the song but it’s edited just for the short teaser for this performance.

We had rehearsed this before and it was nothing, I supposed. We were all grown-ups and professionals. Anyway, it was not a real kiss. However, every time my lips went closer to hers, I felt the need to back away to calm my nerves.

During the rehearsal, Hyuna was being more passionate that usual. I was feeling utterly confused by her actions. The most crucial part came and I moved my lips near to hers. Suddenly, Hyuna came closer than usual. I was surprised to see her face so near to mine that I had to back away immediately.

Hyuna just bit her lips and control her smile. What was she thinking?

The rehearsals ended. Hyuna pulled me aside to where no one could see us. “What is it, Hyuna? We can always talk in a more public place, you know. People will suspect…” I spoke but she covered my mouth.

“With the way you’re talking, people would suspect even more. Just calm down. I just needed to talk to you…” Hyuna folded her arms after shutting me up.

She stayed quiet for a minute before starting again, “Hyun Seung, about Jun Hyung…”

“Look, I promise not to intervene in your matters anymore so…”

“Listen to me!” Hyuna was frustrated and sighed, “I did not accept his confession.”

I nodded slightly, still unsure what she was trying to say, “I knew that. So?”

“So…” She tucked her hair behind her ear, “So I want you to know that sometimes life makes fun of me and I fail to recognise someone else’s presence. And sometimes, life just let me see the light and I truly feel it when people are genuinely nice to me.”

I was bewildered with her choice of words, “What are you trying to get across, Hyuna?”

She looked down and looked up again to make full eye contact with me, “What I am trying to say is… Girls don’t always fancy the bad boys. Nice guys get the girls too.”

Hyuna’s POV

I was done with speaking to Hyun Seung. I hoped he got the idea of what I was trying to say. However, he was known to be gullible and a little bit slow. I sighed after recalling what I had said. I might have confused him even more than before. “Aish, Hyuna. You were never this confused about boys before!” I knocked my forehead repeatedly while walking back to my waiting room.

Suddenly, I bumped into someone as I was not looking at where I was walking. I apologised without looking up from the floor in English since I assumed it was a Singaporean staff, “Ah, I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

I moved away and walked away hurriedly. “You know your English is really adorable right?” The person whom I had bumped into said in Korean to me.

It was very familiar. I turned back and noticed it was Jun Hyung whom I had bumped into. He smirked and walked towards me. I gulped as my heart started to hyperventilate again. He never failed to make my heart go wild every time he was in front of me.

“Hyuna. Tonight. After the show. Meet me at Riz Carlton Hotel at 12 midnight. Room 601.” Jun Hyung said to me in this deep low voice, hoping no one would hear.

“Hotel? Aren’t we staying at a different one?” I tried to recall the hotel we were supposed to stay in but to no avail.

He cupped my face with one hand and smiled at me, “I just need some alone time with you. I need to tell you something personally. Can you do me a favour by meeting me there?”

I was hesitant. I knew it was not right for me to do this but I did not want to reject him.

“Jun Hyung, you promised,” I stuttered after getting all my courage to mention it to him, “You promise that you will give me time.”

Jun Hyung seemed to know that was definitely coming from me soon or later. He was impatient. He kissed my hand after lifting it up to his lips. Again, my heart started racing. “I know that. I also know that if I give you more time, you would slowly slip out of my reach,” Jun Hyung lowered his head.

I had never seen this side of Jun Hyung. He was always cool and calm. Now, he was just afraid – afraid of losing me.

“I don’t want to lose you.” Jun Hyung whispered and held my hand firmly.

I bit my lips, not saying a word.

“I will be there until you come. I will wait for you, like always, Hyuna.” He left after my cheek twice.

I took in a deep breath and walk towards a different direction – I needed to wash up in the bathroom. Too many things were going on today. Before I entered the female bathroom, I heard someone else nearby. He grabbed my hand forcefully and pulled me into a hug. It seemed like a desperate hug but it felt strangely comforting.

“Yah!” I shouted and tried to break free.

“Hyuna, please don’t.”

Hyun Seung released me gently and looked into my eyes, “Please don’t go.”