Jaejoong sat by himself on a somewhat isolated table. People around him laughed and danced while he sat rather stoically drinking what was left in his glass. Hyorin hesitated when she finally spotted him, suddenly regretting her choice of coming to him. Deciding that she shouldn't waste anymore time she walked up to him.

"I came to get you" She said loudly making her voice heard over the loud music when he looked up at her in confusion.

"I didn't call you" Jaejoong said as he finished his drink and placed the cup down forcefully.

"Siwon was tired so he made me come" Hyorin explained.

"Go back, I'll find my own way back" Jaejoong snapped, trying to keep his voice calm.

"I already came here, let's just go" She said to him, wondering why he was acting this way to her.

"I'm fine on my own" He muttered as he took some money and slapped it onto the table. He stood up suddenly, wanting to walk away from her when his head swam and he found himself stumbling forward. He might have fallen had it not been for Hyorin rushing to his side and grabbing his arm.

"Can we please just go? You're drunk" She said as she held his arm firmly.

Jaejoong looked down at her, getting worked up over the fact that she wouldn't meet his eyes. He was impatient he realized as he pulled his arm back roughly and placed it around her shoulders.

"Help me walk" He murmured into her ear.

Hyorin stood still for a few seconds before she began to move, being forced to placed her own arm around him to support his weight. He said nothing, in fact he looked half asleep with his eyes closed and she was content that way. Then maybe he couldn't see the way she bit her lip in nervousness or hear how loud her heart beat just from being close to him. She was surprised at the sense of disappointed that came over her when they got close to the car. She pushed Jaejoong up against the car and held him there as she pulled the passenger seat open and pushed him inside.

"Put on your seatbelt" She ordered waiting as he made no sign that he heard her.

"Can you hear me? Hello?" She asked as she cautiously bent down and stuck her head in the car.

Since he made no sign that he was even aware she was there she sighed and leaned into the car. Once again uncomfortable with how close she was, she reached for the seatbelt and pulled it around him. Resting her knee on the edge of his seat so she could reach around and secure the seat belt. As she moved to get out of the car she suddenly stopped when she moved by Jaejoong's face. Without being aware of what was doing she instinctively reached up and carefully moved a strand of hair his face her eyes admiring all his facial features. She looked at his lips and she wondered jealously how many times Chae Rim had kissed him.

With one swift movement she suddenly moved away from him and shut the car door firmly, as if to remind herself that she was only here to drive him back. And that's what she did. She hummed to herself as she drove, mostly to distract herself and prevent herself from looking over at him. When they finally got there, once again he made no noise and even though she tried to wake him up he stayed passed out inside the car. So with a more exasperated sigh she pulled him out of the car and once again placed his arm around her and placed hers around his as she used her strength to drag him inside the building.

The guards only needed to take one look at Jaejoong to let her pass and she was glad that she didn't have to dig around for her ID card. She pulled him over towards his room when she suddenly stopped, would Chae Rim be there? Ready to take Jaejoong off her hands and into hers? The thought sickened Hyorin.

"Your room is too far" She said to Jaejoong, fully aware that she was talking to herself and that he couldn't hear her as she turned and dragged him over to hers.

"Besides your psycho girlfriend might be there" She said, speaking only because she needed to do something to distract from the fact that she was taking him into her own room, "I don't like her you know. She's vicious. Bet you're embarrassed you slept with her now right? Yeah I noticed when the next morning I came to find you and she was there"

"You know, when I went to find you I had a big speech of how much I hated her and when I saw you it all disappeared from my mind. You can't hear me but at least I can tell myself I said something right? Ha, that was a pretty crappy move though... making her train me" Hyorin continued as she finally reached her room and carefully unlocked the door, "I think she wanted to kill me"

"Which isn't fair because she made it very clear that you two were together you know and I'm not about to meddle in that, why would she even think that?" Hyorin asked as she pushed him onto her bed, letting out a relieved breath.

"But I'm not bringing you here because I don't like her. No it's not that" She murmured as she took off his shoes and straightened him out, throwing her large blanket over him, "Your room was just too far away"

She looked down at Jaejoong, the soft light in her room doing nothing, but making him look all the more attractive. Very aware he was there she changed into old oversized pajamas in the bathroom and paced in her room. She couldn't bring herself to lay down beside him she realized. Cautiously, she took a seat on the edge of her rather large bed, her back to him as she thought about what she was doing.

Hyorin knew she was being silly and yet her mind wouldn't stop replaying images of Jaejoong. She turned him down, she was aware of that much at least and he was over her. Not even a week after he had already gone and slept with another woman and that... bothered Hyorin. But she was being selfish why would she expect Jaejoong to wait around for her when she told him clearly there would never be anything more between them.

"I didn't mean to kill Yu Jin. It was all a horrible accident" Jaejoong's voice suddenly rang out behind her.

Hyorin froze and she refused to turn around. He was awake? Had he been awake even while she complained about Chae Rim to him? While she had brushed that stupid hair strand off his face. Then, none of that mattered because she finally realized what he was saying.

"Yu Jin was my first love. She was the first person to ever show love to me. When I began working for your father I was 14 and lived on the streets. I had no way to make a living, this was all I could do to survive. My parents had abandoned me years ago and I didn't see a reason to decline" Jaejoong said as he sat up and watched Hyorin's back, forcing himself to keep talking about things he had never allowed himself to speak of out loud to anyone.

"I was the worst assassin, I couldn't kill a person. Can you even imagine that? I threw up the first time someone was killed in my presence. Yu Jin knew how to kill but she didn't like it. She was a year older than me, but she was an expert. I was assigned to work with her shortly after my arrival, mostly because no one had the patience to deal with me" He said, his voice softening with affection as he recalled the first time they had met.

"I was mesmerized by her. She was the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen. She was kind too she didn't let this place wear her down. Every time... after she killed she would mutter a short prayer in forgiveness. I never knew why she had chosen to work here, but the way she carried herself gave me hope that maybe I wouldn't be like some of the men here. That I maybe wouldn't end up as  heartless as I had feared" He spoke, the irony in his voice plain for Hyorin to hear and she could picture it too. A younger version of Jaejoong, more innocent, less beaten down and it brought tears to her eyes.

"There was a day where our relationship changed. I had stepped out of line with one of my seniors and he beat the lesson into me so hard I was left bleeding on the training mat. Sometimes when we're there I can picture the stains my blood left behind. She came to find me then, I was sixteen and we had been working together for about a year and a half. She was livid about the way he had left me. She nursed me back to health" Jaejoong said, his voice suddenly becoming dry with emotion, words beginning to just pour out of his mouth, "That was the first time we kissed. I don't know why she would feel that way towards me, maybe she was just lonely, maybe she was just bored or maybe she felt sorry for me, but it changed everything for me. I sincerely loved her from that moment. I treasured her..."

Hyorin sat still listening to the words that came from Jaejoong's mouth. Her heart was gripped by the emotion behind his words. This was the type of person he was she realized. His love had been so innocent. How had things ended up that way?

"And so we began to date I guess. It was little things. A stolen glance, a kiss in between missions, a hug in the dark. We worked hard to keep things secret and it worked. But we got greedy. 2 years later she said she wanted to leave, that she wanted to escape with me. I didn't think things through I was a dumb teenager so I agreed so happily. I pictured a different life for us, a life I didn't know would never be given to me" He whispered his hands forming into fists, taking a breath he continued.

"But I didn't know that in a place like this being in love is never quite that simple. She had her own secrets. She wanted to leave, not only to make a life with me, but because she was betraying this whole organization. That's where Seung Hyun comes in. He was a rookie I think, but he managed to convince Yu Jin to sell out extremely sensitive information and she agreed. On the night when we were supposed to meet I got pulled away by your father and he knew everything. He placed a gun in my hands and told me to kill her. He told me that she was just using me. That I was just a pawn in her quest to be free"

"It didn't matter to me though I had decided as I drove over to find her. I would let her use me if that was all it was. I loved her that much that I was willing to let myself be killed so that she could live. And then... everything went wrong. I got there and I saw Seung Hyun there and suddenly I was so angry, I felt so betrayed. I pulled my gun out and started screaming at her. I'll never forget her face. Her eyes went wide with shock and she stuttered as she tried to get me to calm down as she tried to explain that it wasn't like that. During that moment, all I could focus on was that man's presence and the way his hand rested on her shoulder I hated him so much I decided to kill him" Jaejoong confessed as he stared at his hands, he could almost feel the way the gun had felt in his then clumsy hands.

"At the last minute, I think she saw it in my eyes. When I pulled the trigger she stepped in the way. She should've pushed him out of the way but instead she... punished me by taking the bullet. Seung Hyun and I both screamed and I could see that he cared for her, but that was the last thought in my head. Suddenly you father's men stormed in and Seung Hyun had to leave so that he could live. I was in shock. I fought against arms as they took her body away, screaming for her to wake up. Nightmares haunted me wherever I went, it didn't matter that I was awake or asleep and then something in me just died and I changed" Jaejoong finished, his body tense a he flickered back to reality.

"I'm... so sorry" Hyorin whispered, looking down and sensing the pain he was in behind her. Why was he telling her this?

"I lived with that guilt for years, each day reminding me that I was alone. I hated you the first time I met you. I thought you were weak and you reminded me of her so I hated you. But just like I loved her I began to love you. It was out of my control, my heart that I had thought I controlled so well worried for you, it got excited because of you, it raced only because of you" Jaejoong confessed, deciding that this was it. This was his last try for her heart if she still turned him down then there really would be nothing else he could do.

"And so I thought, well it's because you're like her, but one day I realized something. I realized that every time I thought of you I would forget everything else, including Yu Jin. I began to notice the differences between you and her and for that I began to love you even more than I had loved her. I never slept with Chae Rim, I wanted to make you jealous. She's crazy if she said anything more. I just wanted you to want me like I needed you, if only for a few seconds. I'm a monster like you said, but I could change I think. For you, there's nothing I wouldn't do" Jaejoong whispered.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Edit: Next chapter has a little so skip over it if you're not comfortable with it =)

I really enjoyed writing this chapter wayyy too much. It made me feel all warm and fuzzy and I hope you guys felt it too? Hahaha hopefully! I felt bad for Jae when I wrote out his Yu Jin story... T-T I'm working out the next chapter in my head so hopefully it'll be up soon ^_^

Thanks for reading/subscribing/commenting! =D