It was there again. That feeling of abandonment; that the person who was your whole world was turning their back on you. First it was her parents... now it was Yoongi.

She couldn't see anything else. All she could register was that he was going away.

"W-what?" she asked, hoping she had maybe misheard him. But of course she hadn't...

"I'm enlisting," he said again, softly.

Seung Hee thought it was a dream – no, she hoped it was. A bad one that would disappear when she woke up. And when she did wake up, she would find Yoongi beside her – a Yoongi who wasn't telling her things like this, rather, he would take her in his arms and never let go and whisper sweet nothings in her ear.

"But it's not forever," he was saying. "I swear, Seung Hee, it's only two years..."
She knew that it wasn't a dream – dreams couldn't hurt this bady, they couldn't enrage every drop of blood you possess or create the horrible feeling that you've been tossed away.

"Why?" she demanded, her eye stinging. Even though she kept asking, she knew the reason why.

His eyes dropped to the floor, unable to look at her.

"Yoongi, why?" she asked again. "No... listen, I know... I know it's because you want to make a comeback."
He finally looked at her. "You know?"

She nodded. "I guess I've known for a while that you would do something like this – it would clear up your image, in two years people will have forgotten right?"

But that still hadn't prepared her for the reality.
"That's what I hope." His tone was so soft... afraid to hurt yet trying to soothe at the same time.

Seung Hee knew that it was a practical decision – after all, when other idols had gotten into 'scandals,' a few had been able to come back after serving in the military. And wasn't Yoongi's entire life about music? About producing it, about pouring his soul into something he loved? She didn't want to be the one who stood in the way of something he loved – but she couldn't help the childish thought of, Not fair. She looked down, afraid to meet his eyes because she knew she wouldn't be able to conceal the hurt and confusion.

Yoongi was leaving. That was all her brain could register for the time being. He was going away from her.

But that wasn't the worst.

The worst came when he slid an envelope onto the table.

"What's this?" she asked, still avoiding his gaze.

"It wouldn't be fair to ask you to wait for me – you're still young and-"
"Are you divorcing me?" she cried.

"Seung Hee-"
"Are you serious now?" she demanded, angry tears falling. "Look, I know it's my fault you got into the scandal and all-"
"No it's not!" he yelled.

"Then why the divorce?"

Yoongi was about to reply when the doorbell rang and someone came in.

"It's me..." Mrs Lee stepped inside.

Seung Hee stared at her, the realization of what her appearance meant hitting her.

"Fine," she muttered, unable to meet his eyes. "I get it. I'm going."
She got up and stiffly pushed past her mother and went into the bedroom, getting all her things out of the cupboard she shared with Yoongi.

Yoongi just stoodd there, watching, his hands in his pockets, expressionless. If Seung Hee had looked at him once, she would have noticed the little signs that showed how much he hurt – he hurt more than she did.

Mrs Lee came in and helped pack her bags, trying to say reassuring things but Seung Hee couldn't hear a word, it felt like she was underwater. Distorted, and far away.

Still without looking at him, she walked stiffly across the room and out ino the hallway, followed by her mother. She heard Yoongi shut the door behind her, heard the click of the lock and that was like another stab.

She managed to keep her head up until she reached her mother's apartment. This messy place, cluttered with painting supplies, could never be her home. Home was Yoongi's apartment – no, home was wherever Yoongi was.

Mrs Lee showed her to her room. The bed was narrow and it seemed cold and empty. I want Yoongi.

The cupboards were all for her. I want Yoongi.

She had her own bathroom now. I want Yoongi.

I just want Yoongi...

Her mother put her arms around her and she couldn't keep it in anymore, she just cried and cried while her mother held her.

I want Yoongi.

"He did this for you, too," she whispered. "You know what he told me once? He told me you mean the world to him – that you are his world."

Seung Hee couldn't hear her – she could only hear the sound of her own sobbing.

****

Things fell back into place the very next day. Seung Hee was determined not to let this affect her, and after four days she had a new routine here. She went to college, hung out with her friends, and at home she studied to keep away the emptiness – and from thinking about Yoongi. She tried to pretend that she wasn't waiting for him to call her, always checking her phone just in case he left anything. Not like she would pick up even if he did call... but how could he not call her even once?

Yoongi wasn't mentioned until the fifth day, Mrs Lee saying that he was leaving in two days.

Seung Hee pretended not to hear. What was it to her? He threw her away anyway, and she wasn't sure she could stand seeing him again only to say goodbye.

The morning when he was supposed to leave, she took out the hated envelope. She took out the divorce papers; Yoongi had signed them already and they seemed to be in order. The only thing missing was her own signature – he had prepared this well.

But wait... there was another paper in there too. It was a note, written in Yoongi's familiar handwriting.

This is just in case. But... I would like it if you wait for me. I love you, always.

It came again: regret. She always seemed to misunderstand, she always got angry and hurt him because she didn't understand. To be fair, he hadn't explained. But if only he had said it properly, if only she hadn't gotten so angry, if only she had asked...

He wasn't throwing her away. He was giving her the option of throwing him away.

I want Yoongi.

Yoongi, I'm so sorry... please don't let it be too late...

She threw the envelope into the dustbin before running outside, yelling "I have to see him!" to a shocked Mrs Lee.

Yoongi wouldn't pick up his phone. Desperately, she called Namjoon and was so grateful when he picked up right away. "Seung Hee, you-"
"Where is Yoongi?" she cried. "I have to see him-"

"But-"

"He hasn't gone yet has he?"
"He's leaving very soon..."
He gave her the address and Seung Hee hopped in a taxi, begging the driver to go faster.

Please don't let me be too late...

The taxi stopped at the right place and she scrambled out, immediately spotting the group of six standing in front of the building.

It was Jimin who saw her first. The last time Seung Hee had spoken to her, he had made it very clear he held her responsible for everything that had happened. His expression had been tensed but when he saw her, he almost seemed relieved. He grabbed Yoongi's arm and pointed, saying, "See, I knew she would see sense in the end."

Yoongi just watched her run and stop in front of him, slightly out of breath.

"You're later than expected," said Hoseok. "Do you have any idea how much Yoongi hyung was waiting for you? But no calls, no texts – no nothing!"

Seokjin didn't look too happy either.

And Seung Hee couldn't blame any of them. To them, she wrecked BTS, chased Jungkook away, and had just hurt Yoongi. While she had been staring at her phone waiting for some sign of him, he had been doing the same – he held it close, praying and hoping that she would contact him and give him some sign of what she would decide. Her silence made him fear the worst: she had decided on divorce.

But right now, he tried not to look dazed; even just a second ago he had thought he wouldn't see her again and here she was, all messy as though she had dashed out without having the time to get ready.

He couldn't think of anything to say and tried to bring down his soaring heart: what if she was here just to say goodbye and nothing else after all?

"So..." he said slowly. "H-how have you been?"
That sounded so formal. Like they were suddenly strangers. He regretted saying that in such a formal tone...

She gave a shaky laugh. "I don't know... how have you been?"
"Bad," he said sincerely. "I really... missed you."
"I missed you too..."
"Why didn't you even text me?"
"Why didn't you?"
"I was waiting for you."
"And I was waiting for you."
Yoongi exhaled deeply in frustration. "Do you know... we're pretty stupid if that's what happened..."
"I know."

Namjoon suddenly ushered the staring Hoseok, Seokjin and Jimin a little away to give them a bit of privacy.

"We're stupid," he repeated.

"You're stupider than I am though," she pointed out. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"About what?"
"The divorce! That it was a choice for me."
"Well, wasn't it obvious?"
"No it wasn't!" she suddenly yelled. "I thought you wanted to!"

"How could you even think that?" he said, horrified.

"I don't know?" she shot back. "You never explained!"
"You didn't give me the chance to explain! Plus it's so obvious-"
"No it's not," she said. "And how could you think I would want it? Remember, I told you before that if you run away I'll find you and kill you."
"You're such a gangster-"
"And you have zero communication skills!"
"And so do you!"
They stood glaring at each other until Hoseok called out, "Yoongi hyung, the bus is coming to get you soon! Do you really want to spend this time fighting and blaming each other? Just kiss for heaven's sake!"
Jimin rolled his eyes. "He does have a point, you know. Even though he is the biggest fan of you guys, for once he isn't exaggerating."

Yoongi suddenly gave her a half-smile. "He wants us to kiss."

"We shouldn't displease our fan, right?" said Seung Hee.

He nodded. "That's rule number one, so-"
His words were cut off when Seung Hee grabbed the collar of his coat and pulled him down so she could give him a kiss. "I'llwait for you, Yoongi. Promise."

Hoseok gasped and squealed "So cuuuute!!!" and Jimin muttered, "I knew the lovebirds would get gross in front of us at some point – oh yuck..."
Seung Hee could feel Yoongi's lips stretch and knew he was smiling. That was good – if Yoongi was smiling, everything was ok now.

Namjoon turned away slightly. He wasn't sure why, though. He wasn't jealous – no way was he jealous of Yoongi and Seung Hee... but wait, maybe he was. He wasn't strong enough to stay with the girl he loved, he didn't have the courage to face the media's fury and would never in a million years be able to leave her to protect them both, even if it was only two years. But maybe he hadn't met the right person ... Ha Na had been nice and everything, but he could never protect her like Yoongi. Maybe one day he would meet someone he'd have the courage to protect.

He sighed. There was just one thing missing right now. Yoongi and Seung Hee were happily clutching each other while the other three watched, laughed and poked fun at them. He only wished Jungkook was here...

Namjoon had sent Jungkook text after text, telling him about the dorm, the new arrangments with the members, Yoongi's enlistment and that morning he had told him that Yoongi would be leaving.

But Jungkook never replied. He never answered his phone either, who knew if he still had the same one anyway...

Without much hope, he called his little maknae once more, not expeecting anyone to answer. He nearly dropped his phone when a voice said quietly, "Hyung?"
"K-Kookie," he spluttered. No one else heard him, they were a group of the loudest idiots he had ever met.

"Why weren't you picking up?"
"I don't know..."
Jungkook sounded tired. But different... lighter, somehow.

"How have you been doing?" asked Namjoon.

"It's ok. I'm working, and... hyung, it's just easier."
"What is?"
"Living away from all this. I do miss us as a group and being BTS but... I'm happier right now. And also... I met someone."
"You did?" Namjoon could see Jungkook's shy grin.

"She's amazing, hyung. Like... she knows about it, everything I did and she understands me."

"That's good," said Namjoon. "Really."
"Where is everyone?"
"They're right here. Yoongi is leaving soon, do you want to say goodbye?"
"Not now," said Jungkook. "I'll call him later. There's a lot I need to talk to him about."
"Seung Hee misses you."
"I'll call her too."
"And Seokjin and Hoseok and Jimin."
Jungkook laughed. "Aww, did you all really miss me?"
"Nah, we just missed bossing you around."
"Hyung!"
"Ok no, we did." Namjoon smiled; though they weren't all in one place, he felt that his family was back together at last.

"That's the bus!" shrieked Seokjin, pointing.

Yoongi pulled Seung Hee to him one last time. Despite leaving, he was ok. She would still be here when he got back.

"Don't worry," said Jiimin, as though reading his mind. "We'll look after her for you when you're gone."
"J-Jimin-"
"What? She's part of our family."
"You little rascal," said Namjoon affectionately and Jimin ducked his head with embarrassment.

The boys closed in for a group hug and Seung Hee was right there, in between Yoongi and Jimin.

The bus came to a stop and they broke apart, calling out last minute advice.

"Listen to the seniors and don't act like an arrogant brat."
"Don't get caught napping!"
"You have your stash of food in your bag right?"
"Call me when you get there."
"Ha, imagine doing push-ups at five in the moring, I feel bad for you!"
Yoongi climbed up the steps of the bus and headed to the back and sat down, his head lowered. Seung Hee went to the side and said, "Yah, Min Yoongi!"
He just looked at her, and she smiled. "You'll be fine. And when you get back, I'll be here."
"Are you sure?" he asked quietly.

She nodded.

"Then... please wait for me," he said softly. He leaned out of the window to caress the top of her head one last time, to cup her face in his hands one last time.
"I love you," he said.
"I love you too."

The bus doors closed and Yoongi withdrew his arms and his head back inside.

Seung Hee waved frantically and she could see him give a small laugh. The bus began to move; she went along with it, still waving but it went faster and Yoongi was in the back, waving too, until it got swallowed up by the traffic.

Then she realized: they hadn't said goodbye, technically. And it was done purposefully; they didn't need to because it was not goodbye. He would be back and she would still be here. Though she had felt empty just that very morning, she felt satisfied and contented now – happy, in fact. Everything would be ok. She and Yoongi were still together, and when he came back he would be able to go back to the stage and live the life he loved. She knew she was going to miss him terribly, but she could survive that, right?

Namjoon placed a gentle hand on her shoulder and smiled. Seokjin, Hoseok, and even Jimin were all looking at her and smiling so warmly, silently cheering her on.

She smiled back.

Yes, she could definitely survive two years. This was far from the end of everything, it was simply the end of a chapter. There was still so much...

Her phone buzzed with a text from Yoongi. Yah you dumb kid. Don't go getting all teary or whatever and just because I'm not there doesn't mean I won't be keeping an eye on you anyway.

She grinned. Yup, Yoongi was definitely not gone.

---