Jiyeon's POV

"Mianhe Jiyeonnie. But-- but you can't love me, you- you just can't, let’s get back, I'll drive you home."

With that she started walking back to the house, there were tears in my eyes but then I followed her. 

She drove me home right away, after a short reasoning out with her Uncle Suk Jin. We were silent in the ride home, awkwardly silent. I was blaming myself and scolding myself internally still with tears streaming down my face, I faced my side window and fell asleep. 

Jessica unnie dropped me off my condo, she still opened my door for me and kissed my cheek but then I knew something changed. Everything has changed all of a sudden, all because of my stupid mistake. 

I watched as she drove off and all I could think of was: 

Take me to the sunflower fields. Take me back and I won’t let you know how much I love you. I won't, I promise. Just take me back. 

____ ____ ____ ____ ____ _________//

I woke up and still feeling tired, the dull ache I felt in the ball of my stomach since she left me without looking back yesterday. My alarm goes off two hours after I was actually able to sleep so I haven't really had the chance to rest at all. 

My mind was filled with almost all the lovable images of her. The way her hair falls, the way she wet her lower lip which always end up with her biting them. The way she thinks about stuffs when we're engrossed with our conversations. The soft frown etched on her eyebrows while she digest news information and all my sarcastic and corny jokes and that's forever tainted to the whole being if even she's not and I could feel her. 

I dragged myself out of the bed almost crawling and stumbling to the shower, I can't feel my arms or legs, and I can't feel my heart beat at all. The touch of the cold water against my skin startled me realizing its Thursday. 

I haven't moved on from the roller coaster of emotions I had yesterday and my shameless declaration of love to someone who's not even thinking the same way about me.

Oh god! Where is all of this coming from? You've had a series of relationship before and you always know when to get out. You're always sure of yourself but what's happening to you right now?

What's with her?! 

The half of me who's keeping me sane scolded me, while the other side of me is really tearing me with the truths I can't fathom. 

Can you blame me? Can you tell me she's not worth it? When all this time we thought she's into me and we're contented?!

I let out another silent cry before I get out of the shower letting the cold water wash away my tears. Hoping it could wash away the seal she had in every part of me, so that the after taste of our ruined friendship would also go down the drain. 

Here I am getting ready for work even though I don't have any idea if she's coming later for her session. She hasn't called or texted me or even replied to my messages since yesterday. But what can I do, I have other classes and they paid for my service too. So with all the strength I have left, I drove to the dance studio. The funny thing is I am already expecting to see her in front of it, with her signature pose and winning smile. But the parking in front of the establishment was empty like stomach. 

After parking my car, I checked on my phone for many messages or missed calls from umma, two messages from appa and one message from Eunjung unnie, but there was none from her. I put my phone in my bag and got out of the car. Sohyun was already at the reception are when she saw me, she smiled at me as if asking 'how was the day out with Jessica unnie went?' but then I'm not in the mood as you can see so I just smiled back and went straight to my office. 

I spent the whole day teaching repetitive interpretative steps to youngsters with Boram unnie when she approached and told me to rest because I look pale. I did what she offered since I'm feeling out of beat. 

It was already 4pm, the magic hour wherein a Ducati, or an Aventador or a Rubicon car would roll in gallantly and park just in front of the studio and the mighty Jessica Jung would hop out all smiles, but it's now half past 4 pm and there's no Jessica. 

I was staring intently outside when Sohyun asked if I'm okay and If Jessica unnie is coming today. I just nodded in response not trusting my voice if I ever speak. 

4:45 I was checking the main studio for any litter left by the previous set of students. 

$:55 I was imperviously looking at my phone for any messages or call.

5:15 I was getting bored and impatient. 

5:30 I was already losing hope. 

6:00 I was really mad. 

I decided to go home. That's it! She’s not coming what's left here to do? I turned off the lights, locked the door and left. I was thinking of driving-thru for something to eat but I can't find the heart to do so. I then decided to just eat at our restaurant. 

The visit and dinner at the resto was uneventful thankfully, Myungsoo oppa just left an hour ago and Soyeon unnie was still at her parents. 

I went straight to bed when I got home with a heavy heart and all but I couldn’t sleep. I reached for my phone from the bed side table and opened my conversation with Jessica unnie. 

I can’t take this anymore; I am going to text her. 

To: Jessica Unnie

Hey, I missed you today. What happened?

Back***back****back****back

Hey unnie, sorry for yesterday. You missed your session...

Back***back****back****back

Unnie! You forgot your session today. I waited. 

Sent. 

Why is she ignoring me? So mature of her to not even tell me that she won't be able to come!

I waited for reply or a call from her explaining about what happened but I never received anything. 

I woke up the next day feeling equally agonized like the day before. I must admit Jessica unnie really is good at this silent treatment she's giving me, because instead of just texting or calling me, guess what? She called Sohyun that she won't be coming today too and to just inform me about it.