Lee Jong Suk’s POV

After trying so very hard to hide it from my manager, in the end I simply could not.  He is threating to quit.  I can’t believe he would say that. 

I tell myself it was one time thing.

My back hurts.  My leg muscles hurt.  My hurts.

When I think about why that is, I have to stop because the blood gushes to an organ that I should not think of during the day. 

But I can’t help it.

I think I am walking with a semi hard on the whole day.

I keep seeking him and when he smiles at me I am again reminded of where his lips were last night.  What those hands did.  What his fingers did.  What I did to him.  In how many different ways. 

He comes near me with that smile and my manager joins me magically and Woo Bin turns away.

“We are supposed to be friends.  You don’t have to baby sit me like this.  I told you it is one time thing” I tell him extremely irritated.

“The fact that you are this irritated tells me I am doing the right thing” he tells me.

I randomly wonder if I really need a manager.

…..

“If you smile like that to yourself, everyone will wonder why.  You are supposed to be killing someone today” my manager reminds me at one time.

I was just thinking about how Woo Bin’s breath tickled my ears last night and how he had startled me on my .  I did not realize I was smiling.

“I am wishing that you are my victim and that is putting a smile on my face” I tell him.

“Pffft!” he says.

…..

It is almost like as if Woo Bin is watching my manager.  When he goes away to answer a phone call, Woo Bin practically rushes towards me.

He deliberately brushes my knee with his knee.  Makes a pretense of reaching for my script in my hand and uses it to touch my hand.

“I heard you were not feeling all that well.  Did I work you too hard my Sukkie?”

It has been a very long time since he called me that.

I can feel my ears burn.  “Don’t call me that and off!” I tell him.  Just then my manager comes back, he retreats as if he is afraid.  But, he is definitely chuckling as he walks away.

…..

Another time, he stands very close, shoulder to shoulder.

“I feel hot” he says.

Despite all my misgivings at his very obvious advances, despite telling myself I need to stop reacting and just ignore him, I blow air on his neck.

“!” he says.

…..

“Are you guys flirting openly now?” my manager asks me.

“Hyung, you are really annoying me.  I will call the agency and complain”

“Pffft!” he says.

…..

Another time, my phone chimes.

Woo Bin “I had forgotten how you looked when you turn all red”

I am sure he is watching me, just for my reaction.  I try very hard to keep a bland expression.  I make a show of deliberately ignoring the message.  I refuse to play his game. 

I also ignore how much I like all this again and how much I have missed this.

Another chime.  Another Woo Bin “When can I have my one night stand?”

I am saved by PD calling me for my shoot.

I am supposed to be killing someone.  Right now, my manager and Woo Bin work as my inspiration.

…..

The shoot ends at 3 in the morning.

I thankfully don’t have time to think or feel.  I am so tired that I go to sleep the moment I hit the bed. 

I just have five hours of sleep. 

I could not help but check my messages periodically.  He did not message me at all except for a good night.

I know why.  He does not want to distract me during the shoot.  I appreciate it even if I feel the disappointment.

Why am I looking for his messages?  This was one time thing.  This is my last thought before sleep takes over.

…..

My next shoot involves me and him in the same room as I am introduced to the special task force as the consultant.

He does not tease me today.

Then I recall why we were so good together in our drama.

He is a professional.  He is very serious about his work.  We fed off each other in our previous drama and made each other better.  That is why it had worked so much.

He is being a professional now.  He knows we cannot ruin first scenes together on the screen because of off-screen activities.  So, he keeps away, staying in his character.

In this drama we are not friends.  We are in a way, enemies.  So, there is not much chemistry to show, not yet.

But the fact that they put us together, I know there will be a connection between us.  They are not telling me what that is yet.  My character acts like a bumbling scientist during the day as a mask to hide my true self.   When I am killing people off, I am athletic and cold. 

I am supposed to be weary of everyone in that room when they introduce me to the group.  Today, we don’t have too many lines with each other.  It is mostly me being my bumbling self and just watching everyone keenly to find out how much they know.

I am supposed show some surprise when he starts his briefing.

We stay in our characters the whole day.

…..

Next four days involve us interacting multiple times. 

Our night of passion is almost forgotten except for the brief moment before I fall asleep and when I get ready in the morning.

I am proud of him and myself.

I get why we worked so well together.

Random thought occurs to me during a brief break.  Am I falling in love with him all over again?

My manager is being his invisible self.  It is uncanny how he can read both of us.   It is as if he has magic vision and knows just when to show up and when to shut up.

…..

We get two days break from shooting.

“Did you miss me?” is his first question as everyone is saying their byes.

I shake off the goose bumps that immediately I feel.

I don’t understand my own resistance to his flirting.  I know deep down I enjoy every bit of it.  I almost long for it.  I miss it when it does not happen.  But for some reason, I feel the need to resist.  It is almost as if by showing him I am not affected by it, I can convince myself about not being affected by it.  I keep telling myself this relationship is not what I should want.  

So, I automatically ignore him.

“I missed you” he continues. 

His infinite patience with me is probably another thing I love about him

This insistence about not getting back together again feels like a lie each time we interact.  Each time I look at him.  Each time I see him smile.  Each time I look at his back or his face or catch his eye.  Each time I hear his voice, his laughter, and his chuckles. 

It is ridiculous.  This feeling.  The warmth that his presence brings me.  It is not comparable with anything else that I have ever felt. 

It is like he sees me, with all the lying that I am doing with myself and him.

I sigh.  I resign to what I feel.  “Yes.  I missed you.”

…..