Daydream

"Okay class dismissed." Mr Jung collects his paperwork and places them in his bag before he leaves the class. 

All of my classmates already leave the class as soon as class dismissed  escaped from Mr Jung's mouth. They run out of the classroom as if their life depend on it. I shook my head at my classmate's behavior while my eyes trail at the last person that leave the class. I get up and throw my hand in the air as I stretch both of my arm. I try hard to stay awake for the whole class since I didn't get enough sleep yesterday.

After Jimin drove me home yesterday night, somehow, deep in my heart I keep thinking about him. I can't sleep well that night since my mind is full with Jimin. I'm worried about his wound, his sudden changing attitude and he, himself. All I could think is Jimin. 

The classroom is almost soundless since I can't hear anything except for my own breathing. I gather all my belonging that cluttered on the table and keep it in my bag. I barely see Jimin at class today. He skips a few class and I don't have any idea where he is right now. Perhaps at nursery room. I do noticed Jimin's face still not being treated properly when I saw him this morning and I do realized that both of us tried to avoid each other. 

I don't know why we avoid each other though. Is it because of yesterday night? I sigh as I stand up from my seat and leave the already noiseless class. The hallway is also quiet as I make my way to the locker to keep my things there. Once again, my mind is full of Jimin. I wonder where is he right now. Did he already went home. 

As I pass by the dance club room, I heard a loud song coming from there. Perhaps, there is still student here, practice dancing probably. My feet suddenly stop from taking another step as soon as I stand right in front of the dance room. I don't know why but my body just react by its own. I turn my sight inside the dance room and I see a guy dance his heart out. Somehow his back looks so familiar.

I shake my head as I'm about to leave and continue my way to the locker since I don't want to waste my time, but something make me halted on my pace and my heart stop for a while. 

The voice in the dance room belong to somebody that I know. This voice belong to Jimin. I turn back my sight to the dance room but this time with more cautious. The sight make me trembling not only from the cold, but also from the pain and heartache that no one could repair.

"You should be more careful." The girl in the dance room approach the sweaty Jimin as he stops dancing. I never saw the girl before. Maybe she is in other class. Jimin chest move up and down as he tries to cool down after dance his whole hearted.

"Let me treat your wound. You should take care of yourself or find someone to treat those ugly wound on your face. It will left some scar if you don't treat it properly." The girl gently hit Jimin's head as she start to clean up his wound.

Jimin just smiles at that girl without saying much. So, this is the reason why he skip some class today. He wants to spend his times with that girl. I know I shouldn't feel this way but my heart just rebel.

The girl had a voice that was like music under a summer breeze, almost lost against the noise of the radio. She had a nose like a cartoon character, or one drawn by an artist at least. The bridge was so low profile as to be barely there at all, so that on a face of skin all the same honeyed hue, her nose was a bump just above her dusky pink lips. She is cute.

I don't want to admit it but she makes a cute couple with Jimin. She is so bright, almost as bright as Jimin's personality.

"Let me treat you an ice cream after this." The girl chirps happily as she put an ointment on the cotton and gently rub on Jimin's cut.

"No, let me treat you as a repay." Jimin insists to buy her the ice cream.

I know that I shouldn't eavesdrop their conversation but the curiosity got over me. I know that I will get hurt in the end but still, my leg won't move from its spot. I feel like I've been standing on the wet concrete that almost dry and make me stuck here. Why does it hurt so much, the view in front of me.

After feel like forever, I take a few step back from the dance room and run to the locker. My heart feel heavy as I clutch onto my school uniform. This is wrong. Why do I feel this way when I clearly know that Jimin is nobody to me. He's just my classmates. I can't control my heart. Even I make my brain agree with me, my heart just deny everything I said.

I try to forget about him for a while as I reach my locker. Unlock the key on it, I put all of my belonging in it except for my bag. I close back the locker and make my way to the school gate. I try to ignore the sad feeling in my heart but I failed miserably.

The nausea swirl unrestrained in my empty stomach. My head swam with half formed regrets. My heart feel as if my blood has become tar as it struggle to keep a steady beat. My melancholy mood hung over me like a black cloud, raining my personal sorrow down on me wherever I go. Even the colors of the spring day are drab to me now and the birdsong like so much noise on a child's glockenspiel, grating my nerves.

A morose mood of deep melancholy has descended upon me this afternoon. I try to cheer up while thinking about something else but weirdly, those happy thought is drown in my own sadness. I tend to imagine the worst, suffer agonies of mind today.

"Let's stay positive, Kim Dahee." I let out a little chuckle but why do I sound so pathetic.

I try to make up my mind as I decide to stroll around the park. Who know I could forget about it. I drag my lifeless leg to the nearby bench and plop down on it. Its weird when a gust of wind couldn't make me feel better. Since its still early in evening, there is no one in the park since everyone tries to avoid the evening sunlight. I take out my phone and decide to watch something funny to liven up my mood. As I scroll down the videos in my phone, I click on one of the videos. It was the video that never failed to make me laugh. 

I click the start button and the video is playing but why even I watch a fun, comedy movie, why do I have a tears instead of laughter. The tears just won't stop as I fake a laugh. The more I fake a laugh, the more the tears fall down on my cheek. Why did I cry so hard while watching the fun movie.

The tears soon turn into a sobs and the sobs mix well together with the laughter from the videos. Its such a worst combination. Why am I crying right now. The tears just won't stop from pouring down.

I brush my wet cheek as I shook my head repeatedly. 

"I shouldn't cry." The moment I said those words, I see Jimin and that cute girl walk side by side to the ice cream stall. Once again, my heart stop at the sight of their smiles.

The funny videos keep repeating even though there is no audience. I stare back at my phone and touch the back screen so the videos will be off. Its such a waste to let my phone running out its battery. I keep the phone on my pocket as I stare blankly at the park. They went to the ice cream stall, the same ice cream stall where Jimin and I had that day.

The memories of me and him eating ice cream there start to refresh when I see both of them sit at the same bench I used to sit before. I wonder if I'm just overacting with this feeling. I feel hurt when I shouldn't. Its not like Jimin committed a crime. He just enjoy the ice cream with someone. 

I never know that looking at Jimin with other girl make me tear up. They look so happy as I can hear a fainted laughter over here. What did they talked about. Is it something funny. Why Jimin looks so cool with a plaster on his face. He looks so attractive from far away, maybe from near as well. Does he looks like that everyday. Why with this sudden feeling in me.

The nice weather really suit them. They look so beautiful under the nice weather. I have to admit it, it was a pretty appealing daydream. I would say its a pretty and sad dream.