Lee Jong Hyun’s POV

Present Day

(24hrs before Yoona’s accident)

I am playing with a blue pen in my right hand. With my left hand I am caressing my moon necklace, the one Im Yoona told me how much she liked.  I’m lost. This is the way I’ve been living since I asked Yoona to decide between Choi Seunghyn and me.  I gathered the courage to ask her directly although the answer seems pretty obvious for everyone else.  They have seen how pretty Yoona is getting these days, how lovely and open with her feelings she has become, and even I know it’s thanks to him, but I still have the hope of our memories.  The times we spent togheter, laughing and learning through the eyes of first love.  Yoona told me once I was her soulmate, and that’s mostly where all my hopes rely on.  Today is the day she is going to tell me her final decision.  I want her with me,I hate to think she spends time with Seunghyun, because I know she likes him.

I still remember the first time we met, a smile starts to draw in my face, is almost automatic, it happens very time I remember how pissed I was about going to a party instead of staying at home sleeping, and how that anger became relief when I saw Yoona smiling to the wind, completely beautiful, completely sincere. 

I must admit I was a lucky guy at the beginning.  My first remember of Choi Seunghyun is on his party.  I was so jealous to see how Yoona studied so hard the whole day to sing for him, I would have killed for a gift like that.  My jealousy only increased when I met “TOP”.  He was the perfect example of a cool guy.  He was handsome, tall and had a mysterious aura around him, even with all of that Yoona chose me.  I don’t know why, maybe because I haven’t been able to be with her in a while, but these days I remember a lot our first kiss.  I kissed a girl before, in the cheek when I was in high school and I can say this was completely different, almost surreal.  I got so used to the touch of her hands playing with my hair every time we kissed; those days seems so far now. 

(12 hrs before Yoona’s accident)

I didn’t sleep at all.  I was writing some songs for Juniel’s upcoming album, I am so inspired right now.  I tried to see the positive sides just in case Yoona picks him instead of me. If that’s the case, then Juniel’s album is going to be filled with heartbreaking songs. 

While I was playing the song on my guitar in the cafeteria of our company I see her walking.  She always smiles shyly and I always reply with an awkward bow. Park Cho Ah from AOA is walking towards me. Suddenly my phone starts to ring.

“Hello? Yoongie?” I answer, leaving everything I was doing, ignoring Choa, who silently passes me by, pretending to salute the woman sitting behind me.

“Jonghyun.  Are you free to talk today?”  And I know it right away.  You didn’t pick me. I close my eyes and try to answer.

“Sure, I am”

“See you tonight.  Please eat decently” That’s the end of our conversation. I cannot bear it. I take my guitar and go to an empty room.  I decided that, if I am going to cry I better do it now so Yoona can’t see how hurt I am.  I just want to see her happy; maybe this is my punishment for making her suffer. Would she still be with me if I hadn’t kiss Choa that night? Would you Yoona…?

(6 hours before Yoona’s accident)

I spent the last hours remembering, playing my guitar like crazy.  My hands hurt, but no more than my heart, my head and my spirit.  I wish i could go back in time, maybe that’s the reason why i don’t look for the future with a bright smile anymore.  All i want is to dissapear, to have a time machine and go back to her party, then i would do things different.  I tried to explain Yoona so many times that room filled with candles was for her. That night, after receiving her friends and family, some of artists from my company came too.  AOA was in the guest list, they were debuting and among the members, Choa was my favorite.  We used to be friends when we were traines, now, we are no more than strangers. I prepared everything carefully.  Hyoyeon saw me getting everything ready.  I was going to sing a song a wrote for Yoona in that room decorated with candles.  I was lightening the last candle when someone came in and covered my eyes with a handkerchief, I smiled thinking it was Yoona.  I started to doubt when the girl kissed me passionately, that was not the way Yoona used to kiss me, but as soon as she placed her hands around my neck and started top play with my hair I didn’t hesitate anymore, i kissed her back, until the handkerchief fell off and i saw Choa’s face, I looked at her surprised.  Then i tried to stop pushing her gently, but it was too late. When I saw Yoona standing in the door I ran to her, but Hyoyeon told me to stop, and i salowly saw her getting away from me, i think that was the first time she leaved me to go to Seunghyun, and after that time, a lot more came,I just can’t….

(3 hours before Yoona’s accident)

I keep turturing myself: i haven’t eaten anything; i haven’t talked to anyone. I wonder if this is what Seunghyun felt when Yoona chose me.  My thoughts go back to Choa, again and again.  I hated her so much after you broke up with me, now, its just useless.  If this world funtions in the right way, then i guess you should be with my Hyung, I know you loved him before you loved me, and i know you love him more than you love me, but this pain, this misery don’t stop, this loneliness and emptiness, everything i am experiencing, only she can make me feel this way, and if there’s a way she can go back to me, i would like to find it.  Yoona, I don’t know if he loves you more than i do, but i want you to know, nobody loves you like i do.

(2 hours before Yoona’s accident)

When i arrive to our probably last date, i am much more tranquilize than i thought.  You are still not here, maybe that’s the reason.  I am breathing slowly when the lights from a car light up the place.  It’s your car.

When you get off the car, and run torwards me the first thing you is to hold my hand and look down.  I can’t help but to think how cute you are, so a smile iinmediately builds in my lips. I try to smile the warmest I can, but I guess not even my best effot can hide my pain

“How are you?”  You are the first person to speak.

“You look beautiful today” is my stupid answer.  I ignore your question cause I don’t want to tell you I have been doing bad since this morning.  In another attempt to change the subject I look at my watch. “It s exactly twelve o’clock, your favorite time.  You told me you like it because it’s the start of a new day” I still remember the day you said that.

“Maybe this day it’s not going to start well” you say quietly.

“It doesn’t matter.  I have my genie next to me.  I will ask her to make a good day today” I say smiling

“What?” You are surprised, I don’t know why.

“How come I do remember everything you say but you don’t remember what you told me? The first time you and I went out, you told me you were my genie” I wish we could go back to that time, our first date.

“I’m sorry. I…I guess I’ll have to break that promise”

“Is that so… well I refuse”

“What?” You are again surprised, so I crossed my arms and with my thumb I hold my chin, trying to see through your eyes, but this is the night when I can’t decipher the thoughts of my soulmate.

“I’m not willing to lose your friendship.  I made you a promise that I am not going to break, and the fact that my genie can’t make one wish come true, doesn’t mean she has lost her magic.  You will always be my genie Im Yoona” is the only think I can say.

“Ugh, so cheesy”  you reply with a disgusting face that makes me laugh.  A real laugh, this is probably the only time I have laughed in the whole day.

“Now we’re talking.  Right there, that’s the Yoona I know.  Come on, we are still friends”  I start to think everthing is going to be fine, the world will contine rotate and I will continue living.

“Really?” you ask with sparkle in your eyes. 

“Of course.  We are friends” I really mean it.

“Sorry, I just feel like crying.  You don’t deserve this”

“No please, don’t cry or I am going to cry too. What, I am smiling but the pain is here” “Not all days you get rejected for the Nation’s goddess. I guess I am getting used to it”

“What are you talking about?”

“Come on, I confessed my feelings to you before”

“When?”
 

“Are you for real? Im Yoona, you never listen to me”  You really don’t, you didn’t take me serious that time, when I told you how much I liked you for the first time.

“I do Oppa, I do…” you say while looking at my shoes.  And then things become weird again.

“Listen Yoong, I know you have to go, he might be waiting for you.  I just wanted to give you something.  This is a kind of present” I look for the white silver moon necklace in my pocket. When I found it I hold it against the light too see it for the last time, before I give to you.

“But…this is your good luck amulet” you protest, but I place it in your hands.

“No buts, this is a kind of present.  I know this symbol does not belong to you and me, but for some reason, when I asked you to choose between him and me, I regret it, cause deep inside I already knew the answer. I would like to be angry, but I am not, I know there was a time when you loved me and that’s enough”  My voice wrecks in the last word.  I can’t be mad, to anyone cause I love you both, you and Seunghyun are my friends, and I know you always talk about moons so I decided to give you this, to show you I support you, to show you I will be fine, and I will love you no matter what. 

Maybe the hardest part is to see you going; that means this time everything is over, for real.  I cover my mouth with my hand but a sob scapes.  I open my car and raise the volume.  One of my favorite bands is playing.  I sing along with all that I have:

I knew right then that I'd been abducted

I knew right then that she would be taking my heart

I knew right then no one was above her

I knew right then that she would be breaking my heart

She tore me apart because I really loved her

She took my heart away and left me to bleed out, bleed out

She broke my heart because I really loved her

She took it all away and left me to bleed out, bleed out

The song hasn’t finished but i am already drving.  Driving and remembering. I would like to be a genious, and invent a drug to forget people.  I wouldn’t take that drug tough, cause you gave me the happiest moments, you gave me my first love.  The first time i spend a Valentine with someone, confused and scared that you might not like my gifts; the first time i became a fool for someone, thinking how to dress before a date.  The first time i really felt jealous. 

Withouth knowing, i arrive to the sea. I am not crying anymore, i guess i am dry now. I seat down, take out my phone and start to listen more music.  Suddenly a recording you took starts, you are singing “Asleep” by The Smiths .  It’s like if you knew this moment was coming when you recorded the song.  I really get the meaning of the lyrics.  Listen Yoona, don’t feel bad for me, i want you to know, deep in the cell of my heart i’m glad i really want to go. 

When i am finally done with the music and the sea, i drive to a near store. I feel hungry now. As i am getting away my phone starts to beep a lot.  I have thousands of messages from Yonghwa, Jungshin and Minhyuk.  I call Yonghwa first.  I figure he was already waiting my call, cause he answers immediately.

“Where the hell were you?”  He asks furious.

“I was in the sea, i guess my phone didn’t have enough signal.  What’s wrong?”

“Come to hospital now”

“What’s wrong?  Is it you or the maknaes?”

“It’s Yoona.  We don’t know what happen, but she had an accident. A car run over her. Listen, i won’t lie to you, she is pretty bad.  The only thing Tiffany told us is when the ambulance came, she was holding your moon necklace in one hand and a swarovsky necklace in the other.  Seunghyun is here, he says the swarovsky necklace is his, and i recognized the other, its yours, but you have to come and tell us what happened….Jonghyun?  Jonghyun are you there?”

Authors note:

Ok, so this is the begginig of the second part of the story.  In the first part present day was told through Yoona's point of vieew.  Second part continue with Jonghyun's POV for the present Day.  I hope you all understand the story, and have fun reading as i have fun writing it.