Chapter 40

Author’s POV

The psych evaluation test day came and for the whole morning the senior students of Whimoon were confined in their classrooms till they were done answering the test. As per usual, Yuri was the first one to finish his. He had familiarity with the questions due to the fact that Dohan gave him the same kind of tests before.

As he walks down the aisle of chairs, he glanced at Jessica who was still answering hers. He slipped a piece of paper on top of her desk then made his way out of the classroom.

Can I drop by your apartment later after school? If yes, then keep the note. If no then crumple this into a ball and aim for my head before I leave the room. (If you miss, I still get to go.)

Jessica reads it and sneakily keeps it in her pocket. She breaks into a small smile and continued to answer her test. As Yuri makes his exit out of the classroom, he stumbles upon his homeroom teacher and Dohan talking at the hallway.

Sunhee didn’t agree with Dohan’s decision to suddenly make an appearance at her workplace but when she heard Dohan’s reason as to why, she easily surrendered.

“I need to watch Yuri. He’s been showing…well out of the ordinary signs but there’s nothing to worry about.” Dohan reassures Sunhee with a smile

“Okay but won’t it be too uncomfortable for Yuri? He might feel like your locking him down.”

Dohan didn’t answer as his eyes have spotted Yuri coming outside of the classroom and heading towards their direction.

“We’ll talk about this later.” He gives yet another smile. Sunhee follows Dohan’s gaze and immediately recognizes Yuri.

Yuri attempts to walk past them but Dohan stops him

“Done already? Why don’t we go outside together then?”

Yuri doesn’t say anything and continued his walk. He is then followed by Dohan while Sunhee was stuck looking at their figures slowly disappearing.

--

Once the two were outside the building Dohan was quick to drop the act he has been pulling off. He opened the conversation as the two walked further away from the academic building.

“I was expecting you to come to the office last night but you didn’t. I’m quite impressed with how you’re handling yourself.” Dohan says with a sarcastic tone

At that moment, Yuri stopped walking and faced Dohan.

“You hold my life within your fingertips and I mean that quite literally. With one phone call you can destroy my everything by bringing up the past. The last time I was actually awake was last summer. Instead of doing your job and keeping me under control, you actually pushed me even further.”

Yuri looked at Dohan dead in his eyes and continued to talk

“I’m smart enough to piece together that you have some kind of ulterior motive but frankly I don’t care. Don’t worry, I know how to choose my battles. I may not know what else you’ve done but I’m sure that you’re no saint. We’re both screwed in the head but let’s be honest, you’re the real threat of evil here. I know who I am now so let me do whatever I want and I promise you a good show. Even better than the hell you brought me in.”

Yuri’s statement brought about the curiosity of Dohan.

“If by awake you mean you’re right where you were 6 years ago when you killed that boy then yes, I did mean to wake you up. I’ve done a lot of things Yuri so trust me when I say I know how to play games. I assume you’re planning to involve that innocent girl who sits in front, yes? Prove yourself and when you do, I’ll teach you more interesting things.”

Yuri smirked and shook his head. He went closer to Dohan and whispered directly in his ear

“I’ll make sure to make you proud of the monster you created.”

Even with the response he’s getting from Yuri, Dohan was still on the fence about believing him. Dohan’s vision for Yuri was much more horrifying. With Yuri he was more careful than before. He wanted to avoid a casualty and so he took so much more time to re-create Yuri in the way he wanted him to be.

Yuri was the first one to walk away while Dohan stayed behind.

“I’ll be sure to watch then.” Dohan says under his breath as he smiles.

--

Kim Dohan was born into this world with a vision that was far beyond human comprehension. At an early age, he began to develop signs of having a God complex. He believed that he was set to do greater things that anyone could have ever imagined. The family he was born into was an obstacle according to his vision. He was the only offspring of a two dysfunctional individuals who remained inhuman to his eyes even at the very last second of their lives.

Dohan’s father was drunkard who spent his days abusing him while his mother joins in once in a while if she’s not busy gambling and swindling other people. It wasn’t the rough circumstances he was in that made him the person he is today. Once in a while when Dohan is alone and is able to think about everything that he has done, he knows deep inside nothing would have change any of his decisions. His interest with the human mind has always been with him and therefore the path he wanted to take was a no-brainer. The complexities of the mind were beautiful and exciting to Dohan. He wanted to be able to have a full grasp on it or rather he wanted to be able to have full control of it.

To him, to control was to be a God. To be a God was to be his true self according to Dohan. And according to him a real God, is someone who can alter realities just like how he did.

--

After his encounter with Yuri, Dohan walked back to his office. Upon entering, he closed his door and locked it. He also made sure to close of the windows and his blinds.

Dohan circled around his desk and took out a recorder out of his drawer. He pressed the red button and laid it back down on his table. He takes a sit on his chair and begins speaking

“Patient 0-1 is currently in a partially lucid state. This was brought about when the patient encountered the box that was prepared by yours truly. According to the video footage collected from the Patient’s house, the patient is successfully not able to recognize his mother’s face. At the moment, the patient shows no signs of recollecting anything about the box’s origin. To my surprise, Patient 0-1 did not do anything after reading the contents of the box. The patient did not contact the number specified however it is safe to assume that Patient 0-1 has a confidant. After a quick intervention, Patient 0-1 has discarded the contents of the box and instead believes the given reality. The box was set up to be a test and it seems to be, at least as of this moment, the experiment is still in the gold.”

Dohan grabs the folder that was on his desk and opens it.

“A new variable has made itself available. The mentioned confidant of Patient 0-1 is assumed to have knowledge of the box and much more. Patient 0-1 contacted this person right after reading one of the letters. This new variable may or may not break the experiment. As of the moment there are no plans to eliminate this variable. The reason for this is because this could serve as another test of the experiment’s success. This variable is in a form a girl named Jessica Jung. This individual seems to have a stable psychological background however due to the incident she faced last year, it seems to me that her actions are quite restricted. Nevertheless, she has captured the attention of Patient 0-1 who is now freely planning, according to him, a show for me.”

Dohan tosses Jessica’s folder back to his desk and stands up to face the mirror he brought in early this morning.

“Going back to Patient 0-1, he is starting to show psychopathic traits, one of which is recognizing others who are just like him.” Dohan finishes his recording as he smiles at himself in the mirror.

--

Jessica’s POV

The day went by so fast that at some point, I felt like I just woke up. When I did, I was already walking home from school with Kris. He says that the soccer team wouldn’t be having any training sessions till after the culture festival.

“Remember the party Taeyeon talked to us about before? Do you want to go?” Kris asks out of the blue

I’m pretty sure from the way he looked at me that he really wanted to go. He’s been doing really good in the friends department lately. I could tell that he was beginning to really settle in Whimoon. And to be honest, I have too. Sure, there are still those who look at me with sharp judging eyes but I’ve learnt to just brush it off. Everything’s been going so good lately and I feel like my luck has finally turned around. After what happened last year, I felt as though my willingness to trust would have never found its way back to me again.

“We already promised Taeyeon, remember? I’m sure it’ll be fun.”

“Taeyeon said outsiders are welcome so how about asking Tiffany to go? Daewon is Whimoon’s sister school anyway.”

Now that’s someone I haven’t talked to in long while. We still keep in touch through texts but we haven’t really spoken each other outside of that. She’s been really busy school-wise. Daewon has their own fair share of school activities and Tiffany has always been so active in those kinds of things so I’m not surprised at all. Inviting her sounds like a great idea. I hope she’s up for it.

“I’ll try to call her later and ask if she’s free. It’s happening next week right?”

It didn’t take long for me and Kris to reach our apartment which reminded me of Yuri’s note earlier this morning. We haven’t spoken all day because he’s been all over the campus running errands. Taeyeon said it was probably errands from their coach. He is the captain after all so it’s nothing out of the ordinary if he was indeed running errands for their coach.

I went straight to my room and took out my phone. I figured I should text Yuri about later.

To: KYR

Kwon Yuri-ssi. I just got home. Are you still at Whimoon?

For reasons that I will never admit to myself, at least for now, I took my sweet time sending it. My fingers literally hovered over the send tab for what seems like forever. I suddenly felt this rush from just attempting to send a text to Yuri. My mind started to replay everything. From the day I came to Whimoon up to now.

Let’s review shall we?

I came to Whimoon under certain circumstances that gave me no other choice. I knew the rumors from Daewon would definitely reach Whimoon but since I couldn’t do anything about it. I spent the whole summer trying to prepare my mind and my heart from all the hurtful words that I would hear.

When Ms. Sun Hee asked me and Kris to come inside the room, my eyes immediately spotted that one boy at the back who had his head on his table. My first thought? He was probably one of those notorious and delinquent ones. After our introductions, me and Kris decided to settle ourselves at the back. The seat beside Yuri was empty and so was the rest of the rows here at the back except for us.

My first impression of him being a delinquent got shattered pretty quickly when Ms. Sun Hee called him out to be Whimoon’s top student. I remember looking at his face for the first time. I only got to see him for a bit since Kris was incredibly tall and so my view was a bit limited.

When I did get to have that 3 second solid look at him, well technically his eyes, I immediately thought of Tiffany. Yuri turned his head towards my direction but again because of Kris I only got to see a bit of his face but his eyes caught my attention right that second. They reminded me so much of Tiffany’s eyes. I think that’s why I unknowingly tried to approach him.  Tiffany is such a great friend and he reminded me so much of her and that’s why I guess I thought that if I befriended Yuri, I wouldn’t have such a hard time.

Before I talked to him, I had this another expectation of someone who had a bright personality like Tiffany and boy was I surprised when I talked to him. His looming mysterious aura filled my ears and eyes during our first talk.

I don’t know what really pulled me in but I just wanted to know him more after that. Even after promising myself I would keep a low profile at my school, Yuri just had to happen and make me break it. It has been several weeks since then and in each one of those days were really filled with a lot of happenings. Many of which were really something I would have never expected. A feeling of inevitably surrounds me.

Everything happens for a reason.

I believe every bit of this sentence. Reasons don’t have to make sense and that’s how coincidences happen. I may not know them now but I will eventually. Eventually.

My feelings for Yuri is 100% different from what I felt for Daniel. I’m not sure how to describe it but I guess the best word that I could ever think of is beyond.

What I feel for him goes beyond my reach

What I feel for him goes beyond what I’ve ever felt

What I feel for him goes beyond what I can even understand

I’m not sure if it should be like this but with Yuri everything happened so fast. I used to think that you can’t really say you love a person without knowing their everything but now with him, it doesn’t seem so impossible. With Daniel I spent the whole summer getting to know him but with Yuri, it hasn’t even that long since I’ve come to know him and now the word “love” rolls out of my tongue and mind so easily.

My thoughts scattered here and there but the vibration from my hand made me wake up from reminiscing.

From: KYR

I’m at home now. I left a bit earlier than everyone else. Anyways, I’ll drop by later tonight, if that’s okay.

To: KYR

You would’ve gone anyway even if I said you couldn’t~

From: KYR

What makes you think that? (but you’re right)

To: KYR

Just a feeling :)

From: KYR

Your feelings are on point.

To: KYR

Thank you. Your replies are too :)

From: KYR

I’ll be seeing you later tonight, yes? (jokes aside, if you can’t then it would be okay)

To: KYR

Yes, captain.

I hit send and I chase myself to the bathroom to the showers. I felt excited and yet worried at the same time. The last time he dropped by, I balled my eyes out. Hopefully this time it won’t be the same. Stepping out of the showers, I was faced with another challenge.

What to wear?

I stood in front of my closed for 10 solid seconds before regaining my sanity. Why should I even dress up? It’s my house he’s going to; I shouldn’t be this nervous. I put on my most decent and casual clothes. I’m not exactly sure what time Yuri would “drop by” but I’m fairly certain it wouldn’t do me any good if I just sit here and wait for him.

I pulled out my books and to do some advance readings but I literally couldn’t focus so I had to take down notes to really immerse myself into actually studying.

Time seemed to pass by a bit faster and before I knew it, I had already covered about 2 lessons per subject. I checked my phone and there was no update from Yuri. I stood up from my desk and practically threw myself to my bed. My eyes started to feel heavy and as I was about to close my eyes, my phone rang.

Perfect timing, as always.

I didn’t check who it was because I already had a feeling that it was gonna be Yuri. I say nothing but I accepted his call. I put my phone against my ear and waited for him to speak first.

“Are you sleeping?” he asks me

“Yes.” I say back, trying to fight a smile

A few seconds of silence ensued but then he speaks again.

“How about now?” he asks yet again but now with a brighter tone

I couldn’t fight my smile anymore. An unfamiliar Jessica takes over.

“What do you want, Mr. Kwon?”

“Your very much needed presence. Go outside.” 

--

Author’s POV

Yuri patiently waited in front of Jessica’s apartment complex. A few minutes passed and finally, Jessica showed herself. She was clad in a simple hoodie and comfortable leggings.

“What can I do for you, captain?” Jessica asks in a pseudo skipper voice.

The old Yuri would’ve thought it’d be childish to play along but he wasn’t that Yuri anymore.

“Captain would like to know if you’re okay walking around the neighborhood with him? Specifically, to this park not that far from here?” Yuri says in an animated voice he never knew he could even attempt to do.

Jessica squeezes in a laugh and shakes her head.

“Aye, captain!” Jessica gives a firm salute to Yuri and from there the two started walking towards the neighborhood park.

It was an ordinary chilly night in Seoul. The neighborhood was at its normal pace. With street food vendors here and there and a handful of people walking through. The night was definitely young and the atmosphere brought about a very serene and natural feeling.

Yuri and Jessica quietly walked all the way to the park nearby. In silence, they both found comfort. Upon reaching the park, they were greeted by night joggers and various people walking through the park to get to the main street.

Looking around the park, Yuri chose to settle themselves at a lone bench near the children’s playground. Jessica followed Yuri without asking questions at all, at least until they both sat on the bench.

“Is there anything you want to talk about?” Jessica dropped the slightly playful atmosphere to focus on something rather serious. As happy as she was, she was also worried.

“I do, actually. I’m sure you’ve noticed but by now you know at least a handful things about me, most of which are not quite good but they’re still something. In my case, though, I can count with my fingers the things that I know about you.”

Jessica nodded her head slowly but deep inside she was a bit relieved that it wasn’t as serious as she though it was. That relief was slowly replaced with nervousness as she didn’t exactly know what to say or what to share to Yuri.

“Why don’t you ask me questions then we’ll start from there.” Jessica smiles sincerely and turns to Yuri who was already starting to think of questions.

“You told me about your sister before. I want to know more about your family.” Yuri says as he remembered the time Jessica mentioned to him a sister she apparently has.

“Hmm there’s really not much to say. My dad was born here in Korea and so was my mom but they actually met in the States. They went to the same school during their college days. When my sister was born, my father had already thought about going back here in Korea but because of his job we kept putting it off then finally he had an opportunity to start working here. The only problem was my sister…”

Yuri felt the mood go down. He started to think that maybe he asked for something hard early on.

“Krystal, my sister, she’s really talented in drawing. During one of her school’s exhibit’s, an art director saw her work and was really impressed. Coincidentally, this person was also Korean. Long story-short, this director guy, entered her into this arts program in the States that would eventually prepare her to enter a great Arts High School here in Korea.”

Jessica and Krystal have always been close. When Krystal was born, Jessica would count that as one of the happiest days of her life. She has always wanted a sister and so when Krystal appeared, she couldn’t be anymore happier.

“Right now she’s living with Kris’ parents who are set to come back here with her, probably a year from now.”

Yuri listened intently to Jessica’s story. It was safe to say that he was fascinated at how easily Jessica was able to share things.

“You can say pass to any question I ask. You can also choose not to tell me anything. I’d be okay anyhow.” Yuri put himself in Jessica’s place. If he was her right now, he imagines that he’d have a hard time answering questions but then again they have different circumstances.

“It’s fine. Just ask away.” There was no need for Jessica to feel anxious about sharing anything with Yuri. It was just comfortable. It felt great. And most importantly, it felt right.

Yuri started to play down the basics. He started with prodding a bit more about Jessica’s childhood back in California. The precious stories of Jessica’s innocence were laid down one by one. Surrounded by fading lights and strangers, the two couldn’t have picked a more perfect place to lose themselves in each other’s words and to completely forget the world that continued to move without them.

Jessica was able to share at least half of her life in one sitting. The stories, the laughter and the smiles kept coming and it showed no signs of ending at all.

“…I screamed so loud I woke my parents up. I ended up sleeping in their bed for a couple of months. I got over the whole cucumber nightmare pretty late.”

Yuri was able to laugh carelessly and this sight sent a different kind of happiness to Jessica. It was almost euphoric. It was another side of Yuri that she discovered. It was another memory to keep in mind. The night started to grow deeper. Seoul started to show its colors to everyone in the city. Buildings were lit and streets started to get busy.

“You know… smiling suits you better. It looks great on you.” Jessica offered her opinion on a matter she thought was very important.

Yuri in the midst of his laughter stopped and smiled again.

“Then that means I’m better when I’m with you which isn’t far from the truth.”

Jessica didn’t know how to react but her heart sure did. A loud and distinct thumping filled Jessica’s ears and hers alone. She tried to say something but she was left speechless yet again. She didn’t know exactly what words to say. Reciprocation wasn’t the problem. She has feelings but she didn’t know how to put them into words just like how Yuri does.

“There’s one more thing I want to know. You told me before that you had a chance to be in a relationship but it was complicated. Would it be okay if I asked about that?” Yuri pulls Jessica back to reality and out of her mind.

This question was bound to come sooner or later, Jessica thought. She remembers mentioning it to Yuri. It was one of those rare moments she got the chance to see the side of Yuri no one really knows about.

“Uhh well… It was complicated because it was just a one-sided thing. So technically, I wasn’t really in a relationship but it kinda felt like I was. Well, it sure did hurt me like I was with him but I wasn’t and I think that hurt me more. I don’t know. It was a really complex mix of feelings and all that.” Jessica ran without exactly getting the context of where Yuri’s next questions would lead to.

Yuri nodded his head silently and tried to think of a way to phrase his next question.

“Is this why you said you’re not ready for anything serious?” Yuri observes Jessica’s expression. It was unreadable, at least to him. Jessica, unlike any other person he’s met, is all over his charts. Sometimes he’d be able to see right through her while most of the times he can’t figure her out. It was both frustrating and thrilling for Yuri.

“Sort of?”  Jessica’s voice cracks a bit.

Seeing Yuri’s confused look. Jessica tried to explain in a more understandable way….

“There’s a lot of reasons why but... I mean there’s….” however she fails miserably. The boy beside Jessica starts to laugh again. The way he adores every little she does would be something unknown to her, at least for now.

“Let me make it easier for you then. If I ask you right now, if you’re ready to be in a serious relationship, would you say yes or no?”

--

Author's POV (Still)

She ended up not answering his question. Jessica knows she should’ve but she couldn’t bring myself to say the words. Yuri seemed to be okay about it. When he saw Jessica's speechlessness, he was mannered enough to change the topic. He started to ask her new questions like what her hobbies were, her favorite books and so on and

“I want to ask you to sing just so I could hear it but I know you would say no, at least not in a place like this so I’ll keep this request for another time. It’s getting pretty late. We should probably head back.” Yuri says as he stands up from the bench.

Jessica follows him and the two started their walk back to their part of the neighborhood. Yuri wasn’t lying when he said it was getting late. The streets were now busier than ever. If New York never sleeps, Seoul doesn’t even wink. The lights were bigger and brighter. Along with these lights were more or less intoxicated individuals trying their best to find their way home.

Just as they were about to enter their part of the neighborhood, a group of drunken men were heading towards their direction. The two of them were walking side by side and the hostile-looking group were unfortunately walking parallel to Jessica.

Yuri was quick to act. She switched sides with Jessica and instinctively put his arm around her. He pulled her close and made it as if their clothes were the only thing that were preventing their bodies from actually touching.

Jessica was understandably startled and so he looked up to Yuri, only to discover his face was few breaths away from hers.

“Keep your eyes on me.” Yuri whispers to her ear in a sublte yet dangerous-like voice.

Jessica didn’t have to hear those words from Yuri because at that moment her eyes didn’t want to leave Yuri’s gaze. She was stuck inside the jet black orbs that Yuri had as eyes. For a moment or two, she lost hold of that one string of rationality that she had.

When they passed the possible danger, Yuri slowly let go of Jessica but he didn’t let go of her hand. The two walked all the way to Jessica’s apartment in that heart-warming fashion.

Reaching the front of her apartment complex, Yuri slowly turned to Jessica and smiled at her.

“Thank you for gracing me with your amazing and borderline insane stories.” Yuri let go of Jessica’s hand and said “You should go inside. It’s late. Good night.” Yuri gives a 90 degree bow and keeps his smile upon his lips.

“Goodnight…” Jessica smiled and was about to turn in but then something inside her told her not to go back up to her apartment just yet. Whether it’d be her bursting feelings taking over or just a result of her actually realizing and completely understanding how she feels, something in her clicked and that something wanted to answer a question.

“My answer’s yes.” 

-- 

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