Summer 2012

Mangwondong, Seoul

       “YooKyung-a....we’re here...!!”, as soon as they arrived in front of YooKyung house, Bomi shouted. She always be the bubbly and cheery one, almost same with Eunji. They both is like a twin sister that have same personality, both cheerful, dork, mischievous, laugh a lot, but both have short temper, so they have a lot of sisterly fight, when they lived together. And between them is Chorong, she used to called ‘Solomon’ Chorong by both of her friend. Because although she is a bubbly and cheerful too, but she have that wiseful personality, even though that side of her is seldomly seen, rather than her clumsy one. And the thing that really brought them together is their eating habbit, they all love to eat too much.

          Bomi is same age with Eunji, and she work at assistant designer in one boutique at Hongdae, and worked as part time bartender in Shilla Club. There is where they known each other back then, befriend, and decided to stay together. After all their character is too fit for each other. In the other hand, Chorong, who is Bomi cousin, is a hapkido instructor. Her family run a hapkido center in her hometown, but she want to give it a try at Seoul, so she became a hapkido teacher in one of private school in Seoul.

          “YooKyung-a.....!”, she keep press the bell. “Yes....Bomi? Wait a minute...”, they heard someone said behind the door. “Bomi-a, Chorong eonnie, nice to meet you again, it’s been so long. And... Hyerim?”, YooKyung hugged Bomi and Chorong that in front of her, and when she looked at Eunji, she feel a little bit hesistant. Because all that she knew that Hyerim is in Tokyo now, and this girl in front of her, although has a similar face with Hyerim that she knew, she just a little bit different from then. A different vibe. She looked slimmer, her chubby face not all gone, but reduced a lot, she become a lot prettier.  Her clothes looked like a young lady from wealth family, ellegant. And she looked more mature, more calm than she remember.

          “Are you really Hyerim?”, she asked her, but Hyerim just hugged her, “Of course it’s me, but you can call me Eunji now... How are you? You looked exactly like before? Children made you never aged huh?”, she smiled at her. YooKyung is a preschool teacher. She is exactly like a girl should be, pretty, calm, nice, and very feminine.

          “No..no...no... actually children made you aged”, she laughed. “Come in...come in...”.

After a while they looked at her house, they all fall in love with that house, maybe the other reason is the neatness that never they found in their home. Bomi and Chorong didn’t have anything to refused, but they all aware of Eunji feeling toward this area. More over her old apartment is in the same building with YooKyung’s.

“So... what do you think?”, Chorong asked Eunji, when they all sat in living room, eating the pancake that YooKyung made for them. “It’s all yours to decide...”

“I’m all fine eonnie, if you worried of me. Beside I like this house, and I think it will be nice if we can stay together like this again.” I’m fine, I’m all fine, those memories is not mine anymore, it won’t affect me anymore... Hyerim said to her self. “But what about Yoseob oppa? He said that he want to stay in the same area with me. He never stayed in Seoul, so it will be convenient for him if he know someone.”

“Do you looked for another house”, YooKyung asked her. Hyerim just nodded, “Mmm... we need one other house for my friend, maybe in this area?”

“No... not in this area, but in this building.”, YooKyung smiled at them, my neighbor recently left to their hometown, I guess their house is still available. It’s exactly in front of my house...”

“What...? Wow... such a coincidence... Great”, Bomi claps her hands, “So...Eunji-a, how?”, she looked at her friend to saw them all smiled at her, and Eunji nodded to her, “Maybe it’s a fate, so...yes, it’s a big yes...”, and they four make a group hug, and trolling around the house.

...

“Howon-a...Are you sure you don’t want to stay here?”, Sunggyu asked Hoya when he get his car in front of their house. Tonight they have family dinner with Hoya, and his grandmother insist that he should stay there than in the hotel. This is where his family are. But as usual, his stubborness beats them all. Although he want to spent time with them, but he thinks that better if he had a little time alone, with his mind.

          “Soyou said she still miss you though, her brother in law who never come.”, he ruffled his hair. “Don’t you miss us? You seldom came to Seoul, yet you always stayed in hotel... I know...I know you searched her for so long”, he put his hands up when he looked at Hoya eyes. That eyes that lost his soul, so different with his eyes before. “So, what are you planned to do?”

          But Hoya just shrugged, “Truthfully, I don’t know hyung. I don’t even know how to approach her, she just so cold to me, even colder than before. I can feel that she hate me that much. But I don’t think I can lose her anymore, not this time. I searched her for so long, and now when I found her, I don’t know how to face her, pathetic huh?”

...

Mangwondong, Seoul

          After a while, Hoya arrived in front of his old apartment, that him self didn’t aware why he drived there. The house where he used to lived with Eunji. Just for four month, as long as his marriage, but for him, this is something that he treasured, something that tied him with her memories. He come in their house, it’s been 3  years, but it’s look exactly the same. Their maid come in a week to cleaned the house, but it’s still remains the same. He said he want that if she come one day, she wouldn’t feels too different.

Their wedding picture in the living room, a small couch in front of that. Couch that stained with caramel coffee. A little memory when she spilled her caramel coffee iced in that couch, and his nag when he knew about that. Their kitchen behind it, a bathroom, and two bedroom, her and his. It’s just a small house, with some memories within, but for him it’s everything he had.

How Hoya regreted it, in their four month marriage, and in half and year he knew her. He can’t acted nicer, gentler, better towards her. He just act all cold to her. That’s not he wanted though, but his ego restrained him.

He  entered her room, where all her are belongings still there. Her clothes, her books, her CDs, her mp3 player, her photos, her diary... Her secret that made him knew her heart, that she loved him. He took the diary, he read it again for the several times already, but still, he still feel that his heart is ripped. And for the several times too, his tears falling slowly...

The words I wanted to say in front of you, the words I couldn’t say. Without the chance to say them, you left me alone in this place. All I can do is watch, all I can do is hold on, and wait for you here. You’ve gotten farther away leaving only regret.

The words I couldn’t say to you....I love you. The words that I couldn’t bring myself to say. Without the chance to say them, you left me and going farther away. Didn’t I try to reach you? Didn’t I try to... but you just going farther from me.

I call out without sound, I call out remembering you, I try forgetting you. I try to empty myself of you, knowing your mind isn’t here. I say it with my mind, thinking that maybe you’ll come back to me. I yell out again today even though you won’t hear my voice, but I keep calling. In a house without you, there’s nothing to do. I know that you’ll already have forgotten about me. I try to erase traces of you in my room.

But still, I say it with my heart, that I love you. Thinking that you’ll come back to me. So I wait... I wait thinking that I may run into you...

...