The Reason by SHINee

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Recap: Seunghyun and Ji Eun got into an arguement about him punching Zico, and now she has left the room in anger.

 

   The ground floor’s cafe was chic and relaxing. Business had definitely improved with the arrival of the students for camp. Jazz music floated in the background of giggles and hushed conversations. At the corner of the shop was a very displeased young man.

 

 

 

 

 

  “Noona, tell me again why you are here?” Jonghyun said, trying his best not to let the frustration creep into his voice, although not very successfully.

 

 

 

 

 

   “The cheek of you to ask me that,” the slightly older woman with hip-length hair and over-the-top nails said, before sipping on her cup of latte. “Kim Jonghyun, with that voicemail that you gave me, how could I not be worried? And when I call you back, you have the audacity to not pick up? Of course I’d have to rush all the way here. ”

 

 

 

 

 

  “I already told you-” But the woman put a hand up to silence him, and continued on,

 

 

 

 

 

  “How can you be so weak? Look at you, so skinny! It’s no wonder that that Ji Eun keeps on bullying you! What happened in the past is enough, I’m not going to let her trample over our heads again!”

 

 

 

 

 

  “-but, I didn’t say that-”

 

 

 

 

 

  “Speaking of her, where is she? I must deal with her myself. Jonghyun ah, we need to get our revenge, do you hear me? Our parents did not go bankrupt for nothing. People like her are just scums. You,” she lifted her pale finger to point at him, “are too kind-hearted. And weak. And pathetic. You won’t be able to deal with her. I’m telling you, she’s just making use of our family. She appears innocent and everything, but she isn’t! Ji Eun is very cunning!”

 

 

 

 

  With a shake of her head, she took another sip of her coffee.

 

 

 

 

  Jonghyun exhaled, shoulders slumped. “Yes Noona…” he muttered.

 

 

 

 

  

  At the corner of his eye, he spotted Ji Eun herself waltzing into the cafe. Speaking of the devil, Jonghyun thought to himself with a scowl. He was relieved that his noona’s back was facing the entrance, or else pandemonium would unfold once his noona saw her. Ji Eun’s hair flowed behind her as she turned her head left and right. She shouldn’t be walking around now.. Hadn’t she just fainted? And suddenly, Ji Eun caught Jonghyun’s eye on her. She stiffened before looking away, resuming her search for somebody.

 

 

 

 

   Jonghyun scowled. Could it be? That she was feigning just now? Maybe she really didn’t faint, but only did so to gain the attention of the other two guys… He sighed…

 

 

 

 

 

  “Right? Don’t you think so Jonghyun?” His noona’s question detached him from his thoughts. Had she been talking all along?

 

 

 

 

  He surveyed her serious expression. If he said that he wasn’t listening, he would be dead for sure.

“I’m not so sure…” He said with a shrug.

 

 

 

 

  “That’s why I say that you’re too kind hearted. Seriously.” She narrowed her eyes at him, and went back to surfing the net on her iPhone.

 

 

 

 

 

   Close one, Jonghyun thought.

 

 

 

 

 

   “Omona! Jong, you wouldn’t believe this! Why didn’t you tell me anything!” his noona exclaimed at something on her phone.

 

 

 

 

   “What is it..” Jonghyun muttered, slouched against the chair.

 

 

 

 

 

   “This! I knew she was a witch, but how did she get close to the T.O.P.?” she said, shoving the screen into his face.

 

 

 

 

 

 

   Jonghyun frowned in confusion and warily reached out for the phone.

 

 

 

 

 

 

   “TOP OF BIGBANG AND A HIGH SCHOOL STUDENT?” the words screamed. In the background was a picture of T.O.P. kissing Ji Eun from the afternoon’s events.

 

 

 

 

   Jonghyun stared at the picture on facebook, dumbfounded. Rising mutters were heard in the cafe and Jonghyun looked up from the phone in alarm. Ji Eun was surrounded by the students, many of them throwing out blunt questions at her.

 

 

 

 

 

   She backed away uncertainly, and scanned the area, looking for someone. When she met Jonghyun’s eyes, her gaze intensified, and even though there was a distance separating them, Jonghyun could see the tears well up in her eyes.

 

 

 

 

 

   She broke the eye contact out of a sudden and rushed out of the cafe, with a crowd following  behind her.

 

 

 

 

 

   Jonghyun stared at her retreating figure, his mouth hanging open.

 

 

 

 

 

  “Well, at least there’s a good outcome in that.” he heard his sister laugh.

 

 

 

 

 

  “Noona!” he shouted exasperatedly, halting her in surprise.

 

 

 

 

 

  He shot her a glare and gathered his belongings, bounding after the crowd.

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

   The resounding knocks on the door grew louder.

 

 

 

 

 

   Choi Seunghyun glared at it wearily, willing it to stop. “Ji Eun’s not here! Go away!”, he almost shouted.

 

 

 

 

 

   “TOP, TOP! I know you’re in there!”

 

 

 

 

 

 

   Seunghyun felt the hair on the back of his neck stand. But then he relaxed. It must be either Zico or that Jonghyun guy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

   er, he thought, i’ll just let you tire yourself out.

 

 

 

 

 

 

   “It’s about Ji Eun! She’s in trouble! People found out about you and her!” the voice continued to shout, never backing down.

 

 

 

 

 

   At this, Seunghyun flung the door open. He came face to face, surprisingly, with who he recognized to be Yoseob. “How did you know about…” he started.

 

 

 

 

 

 

   “Everyone knows. Someone posted a picture of you and her on facebook, and it’s been spreading around. She needs your help, downstairs, there are people…”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

   Before listening to what he had to say, Seunghyun had already dashed downstairs.

 

 

   The crowd of excited girls and a few boys was hard to miss. Seunghyun strained his eyes to see the small figure standing in the midst of them all with her head bowed down, her hair shielding her face.

 

 

  Anger surged in his chest as he dived into the crowd, shoving everyone away, until he reached her. When he finally did, he wrapped a protective arm around her. He used his other hand to pat her soothingly, and shouted at the crowd, "Quiet! You're scaring her!"

 

 

 

   The crowd's squabbling dissolved at once.

 

 

 

   "Hey, is that TOP himself?"

   "Ohmygosh, TOP Oppa! TOP Oppa!'

   "It's TOP Oppa!"

 

 

 

   The murmurs rekindled into the noise from earlier. Even with a mask on TOP was recognizable now. Girls clawed at him, and cameras flashed. Ji Eun hid her face further into his embrace, whimpering.

 

 

   "TOP! Can I have your autograph!"

 

 

   "TOP TOP! What are you doing with such a plain girl like her?"

 

 

  Seunghyun thought he would just punch all those people right there and then. Realizing that a crowd was gathering, he felt a wave of nausea hit him. Muttering a string of curses under his breath, he made a run for it, tugging Ji Eun along.

 

 

   "Oppa! Oppa! TOP Oppa!" the choruses escalated.

 

 

   They ran down hallways after hallways, with shrill screaming trailing behind them. Why were they so persistant? He wasn't their TOP Oppa! He looked down at Ji Eun, feeling even angrier when he saw her tear-strained and panicked face.

 

   "Ji Eun, don't worry. We'll get out of this." He said.

 

 

  She stared at him wearily, but then lifted the corners of her lips. She wasn't alone in this, so she didn't need to fear.

 

 

  "Oh no," she said, her smile falling at something she saw ahead.

 

 

  They had reached a dead end.

 

 

   Seunghyun instinctively led her back from where they had just came from. The voices were getting louder by the second. He looked around desperately for a way out. It was no use.

 

   "Ji Eun, over here!" a voice called out.

 

 

   Ji Eun curiously followed it, and was dragged abruptly into a room, with TOP falling behind her.

~~~~~~~~~~

   The door of the janitor's closet creaked to a close as darkness enveloped Ji Eun and TOP. With a grunt, TOP picked himself up, shaking his hands and knees of the dust.

 

 

   "Ji Eun?" he called, reaching out to her in the dark.

 

 

   "Hyunnie Oppa, I'm here. Are you oka-"

 

 

   "Shhh!" a voice that wasn't Seunghyun's interrupted her.

 

 

   The voices of the girls who were chasing after them were heard. They came dangerously close, Ji Eun could tell.

 

 

  "Huh? Where are they?" the voices mingled in confusion.

 

 

  The shuffling of their footsteps and murmurs of their voices soon faded, signaling that they had left.

 

 

   Ji Eun sighed in relief, slumping against the wall behind her. But she tensed up when she remembered there was someone else in the closet that had pulled her in in the first place.

 

 

   She fumbled around, instantly locating someone's knee. "Who are you?" she said harshly.

  

 

   The person didn't answer, and Ji Eun hit her knee.

  

   

   "Who are you?" she said, louder this time.

 

 

 

   "Shhh... You don't want them to hear you." came a hushed reply.

 

 

   "Jonghyun?!" she whispered, retracting her hand, as if she had touched something scalding hot.

 

 

   He chose to remain silent, which made Ji Eun's heart beat faster. She scooted away from him, to the other side of the closet, expecting to use Seunghyun as her shield. But all she found was a plushie. Her heart sank. No Seunghyun, you can't leave me now. Not with Jonghyun, in a room alone! She couldn't go out now, right after the girls had left. Her fingers wrapped around his plushie form, and squeezed him tightly.

 

 

   The seconds of silence that trudged by felt like hours. Ji Eun felt as if she was drowning in an ocean with a shark circling her.

 

 

   "Jonghyun, what do you want? Why did you help me get away from those girls?" she asked slowly, clutching Seunghyun for strength.

 

 

   "You can drop the act now. Stop acting like such an innocent and scared little girl. Although I must say, your acting is really good." He said, with venom evident in his voice.

 

 

  "I'm not.. I'm not acting. Why do you even say that? And how could you post those photos online? Do you really hate me that much?" Ji Eun said, getting angry herself.

 

 

  "I didn't upload those photos, even though.. even though... I hate... I hate you." he said, his voice getting softer and softer. Ji Eun always knew that Jonghyun resented her, but to hear him say it himself... She felt as if he had just stabbed her straight in the heart.

 

   Unbeknownst to her, Jonghyun was trembling. Maybe he really was as weak as what his sister said.

 

   No, I'm not, I hate Ji Eun. He thought firmly, but deep down inside him, he knew it wasn't true. After all these years, he couldn't bring himself to hate her, even after what she'd done to his family.

 

 

   "Why... why do you hate me?" Ji Eun's tentative voice broke his resolve. He didn't want to hate her, but his sister was right. Not hating Ji Eun would mean that he was disloyal to his family, no matter what Dad and Mom said.

 

 

  "Stop playing dumb, Ji Eun. After all that you've done? You're asking me why I hate you?"  He said, intending for it to strike Ji Eun, but the pain was evident in his voice.

 

 

   "What do you mean? How could you say that?" Ji Eun said "You were the one who treated me coldly when I came back home. You were the one who bullied me all these years. Living in the other city, I was all alone. But I always told myself, 'It's okay because I'm going back soon.' I thought you were my best friend, Jonghyun." Her voice cracked a little, and so she paused, gathering her emotions.

 

 

  "But you-"

 

 

 

  "But no. Things were so, so much worse than when I was away from home. Even my friends were gone. Even you were gone. I should have just stayed there forever and not come back. I always told myself when I was there, 'It's okay, even if I don't have mom or dad there, I'll have Jonghyun'. Guess what? NO. I was wrong." Ji Eun had already broken down into a blundering and crying mess, despite her efforts not to.

 

 

   Jonghyun stared at her incredulously. "You left me out of a sudden without saying anything, and not only that, you left me with your parents' debts. I trusted you so much! After that incident I hardly trusted anyone, because I always told myself 'If even Ji Eun could betray me, then other people would too'."

 

 

   "What are you talking about? My mom forced me to leave. I didn't have a choice!" Ji Eun said between whimpers. "And what do you mean by debt?"

 

 

   Jonghyun felt a sinking feeling in his stomach. It couldn't be.

 

 

  "Don't play dumb with me Ji Eun. Ha, wow you're a really good actress." He forced a laugh, scoffing.

 

 

   "Why do you keep saying that? I'm not acting! Just what debts are you talking about?! " Ji Eun said, crying.

 

 

   "Your.. your parents debts...." Jonghyun said slowly, his head spinning, "Your father borrowed money from loan sharks. And that's why your mom brought you away wasn't it? To escape from the loan sharks. And all you did was make use of my family to pay the debts...?"

 

 

   It was only then that he realized he had never confronted Ji Eun about the whole incident. He had assumed all along that his sister was right about her landing his family in trouble. Fear hammered in his chest.

 

 

 

   "We were harassed everyday. It was all because of you... " he said to the darkness in front of him, but more so to reassure himself. "You landed my parents in bankruptcy. You got close to me just so that our parents could be close as well..."

 

 

 

   He wanted to sound confident, but doubt was swelling in his mind now. "Didn't you?" he asked in a small voice.

 

 

 

   The question hung in the air. Jonghyun searched for Ji Eun's face, but it was blurred by the darkness. All he could make out was her silhouette.

 

 

 

  A million of questions were racing through his mind. Why did it sound like this was the first time Ji Eun heard about her parents' debts?

 

 

  No, she had to be acting again. That had to be it.

 

 

 

   All those years in middle school, he poured his food on her, he laughed at her, he made sure she had no friends. It was all for revenge for his parents, even if they didn't know about it. He had always condemned her, always felt righteous in doing so. Or did he?

 

 

   He actually felt painful to do so, for every time he would remember how Ji Eun betrayed him. The pain far exceeded his hatred, even if his sister had instigated him to bully her. Because, he loved her dearly as her friend and as her cousin. And he almost couldn't believe at times that under that innocent and sweet face would be someone so cruel and cunning.

 

 

 

   But why should she, if she had no idea of what her parents' did all along? He felt a wave of panic wash over him.

 

 

 

   He recalled memories spanning from middle school up to now. That lonesome figure always with her head down, no food on her plate, since it was drenching her clothes. People always laughing at "how ugly she looked", no one inviting her to parties. Guilt stabbed him everywhere.

 

 

 

   Whenever Jonghyun saw her in the past, he would feel sad and sorry, but he had always hardened his heart, telling himself that all of this was for his parents. He recalled memories of himself crying over their lost friendship, crying for himself. All the self-pity he had would be unleashed on Ji Eun in the form of vicious acts.

 

 

 

   It continued that way until Clara came along. Clara didn't mind the rumours, and even stood up for Ji Eun. Soon the teasing ceased, and Jonghyun released his grip on her as well. His sister was still incessant on revenge, and he still picked on her from time to time.

 

 

 

   The vivid scenes ran through his head, as his heart palpitated wildly.

 

 

   The question was still hanging in the air. "Didn't you?"

 

 

 

   I would tell myself, 'It's okay, even if I don't have mom or dad there, I'll have Jonghyun"

 

 

 

   She didn't have her parents. She trusted him.

 

 

 

   All the information was crashing down on him.

 

 

 

   All this time, she hadn't known anything.

 

 

 

   It was all her parents' doing.

 

 

 

   She was just a little girl.

 

 

 

   She genuinely wanted to get close to him.

 

 

 

   And she was the one who was bullied and picked on for no reason, all these years....

 

 

   All these years...

 

 

   Ji Eun still hadn't answered his question, but she didn't need to. Jonghyun already knew the answer.

 

 

 

   He was the one who was the villain in this whole story, not Ji Eun. How could he face her from now onwards? After all that he'd done? And she didn't even do anything to him to retaliate!

 

 

 

   In desperation, he cried. Tears poured out unceasingly, as he clasped his mouth to prevent his sobs from escaping. What should he do now? He had to be the worst person alive.

 

 

 

  "I'm sorry," Ji Eun broke the silence. The two words made Jonghyun's heart wrench in pain even more. She didn't even do anything wrong. He was the one who was supposed to say them, not her!

 

 

 

  "I... I didn't even know my parents did that. No wonder you hate me. I.. I'm so sorry Jonghyun," she said, quivering.

 

 

 

   "Why are you apologizing?!" he shouted, surrendering to his tears. "I've never really hated you Ji Eun... I... I..."

 

 

 

   He reached out to her in the darkness, and enveloped her into a hug. He felt her shoulders tense against him, but he hugged her even tighter. "I'm so sorry Ji Eun. I'm so so so sorry. You don't know how sorry I am." he wept.

 

 

 

  "I thought... you were making use of me and I..."

 

 

 

   Ji Eun didn't respond, but he could feel her loosening up. He felt her pat his back slowly, rubbing it in small circles like she did when they were children.

 

 

   Time passed by with them in each others' arms, one weeping away all his guilt while the other patted him calmly .

 

 

 

   "Jonghyun", Ji Eun said gently once she was confident enough to speak, "it was all a misunderstanding. I'm just glad you didn't, and don't hate me."

 

 

 

   "I'm so sorry Ji Eun... Can't you just scold me?" he said, sobs rekindling into wails once again.

 

 

 

   "It's alright Dinohead." Ji Eun said, patting his head.

 

 

   "I'm really really sorry Ji Eun. I'm so sorry." He said, voice cracking.

 

 

 

   "I said it was alright..." Ji Eun said again. "Come on, let's go." As she said this, she stood up, pulling Jonghyun with her.

 

 

 

   "Wait.. Wait.." He sobbed. "Let me clear up my face first. I don't want anyone to see me like this."

 

 

 

   "Aigoo, you're still so mindful about appearances. What a vain guy." She said, making both of them laugh. When he finally calmed down, they stepped out of the closet, white light blinding them.

 

 

 

   "It feels like years since we've stepped out!" Jonghyun said, rubbing his slightly swollen eyes.

  

   "Wait, where's T.O.P.? I remember him being in there too." Jonghyun frowned, and turned around to look at Ji Eun.

  

  

    Why is his memory so good? Ji Eun thought sourly. "No he wasn't!" she said, looking away.

 

 

 

    She was a horrible liar, but Jonghyun really didn't see Seunghyun around, so maybe he really wasn't there.  But he did remember hearing his voice...

 

 

   Jonghyun looked at Ji Eun once more, and she gave him an angelic smile. After all that had happened, he  couldn't not trust her again.

 

 

 

   He was about to leave it at that when he saw the plushie in Ji Eun's hand.

 

 

 

   "What is that?" he said, pointing at it. Ji Eun frantically hid it behind her back. "What? What are you talking about?" she asked, but he knew something wasn't right.

 

 

 

   With a swift motion, he grabbed the TOP plushie, and peered at it.

 

 

   "Don't tell me..." His eyes widened as he turned to look at Ji Eun. She stared at him, hoping that he wouldn't say what she thought he would..

 

 

 

   "Did... did he turn into a plushie?"

 

 

 

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[Author's Note]

Hey thanks so much for reading! :)

Sorry for uploading so slowlyyyyy.

See you in the next chapter! :) Do comment if you want to ! And subscribe too~ Hehehe~

-Notelights :)