It was weird. Before I had reportedly fainted, it didn't feel like I was going to. But at this moment, as I sat at the back seat of the car, the nervousness I felt, wrenched my stomach and made me feel like I was going to faint soon.  I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Which only made me realize how shaky my breaths were. I was still lightheaded, just as how I felt when I woke up at the clinic. But it was worse.

Please don't be something bad. I prayed in my head.

My body quaked stronger as the car turned to pull up by the front door. The maid opened the door for me and guided me to where the said agents were. I was brought to my father's office, but I didn't enter at once. I took more breaths and clenched my fists, as I nodded at the maid to open the door. Two agents, seated at the sofa near my father's desk, greeted my sight as soon as I entered. They stood up to greet me and bowed. I bowed back to them, then gestured to the sofa to signal for them to sit. I took the seat my father would occupy and waited for them to speak.

"We're sorry for coming at such  short notice. You must have been busy at school when we called for you."

"It's fine. It is  an emergency, as what I've been told" I managed to reply.

"So what is it? What exactly happened?" I felt my heart pound hard after asking the question.

I saw them exchange glances, looking hesitant. The other guy who hasn't spoken yet, cleared his throat before speaking.

"We have to apologize. We didn't expect for something so unfortunate to happen"

I felt as if my lungs were closing on me and I couldn't breathe.

"Can you please get to the point?" I impatiently asked. I didn't mean to appear bratty but the suspense was getting to me and was making me feel frustrated.

"Your parents' plane crashed and couldn't be tracked down. We're afraid that they didn't survive the impact of the crash"

That was all I heard. Though they kept explaining, I couldn't understand what they were saying anymore. How do you wake up one day, and suddenly have everything fall apart? Things were happening all at once, making my head start to ache. Was my heart still even beating? Or was I already dead?

"Miss Kang? Are you listening?" their voice snapped me out of my trance.

"I--" I tried to speak, but the words got caught in my throat.

The guy sighed. "We understand. You are in no condition to have such a conversation yet. You must be so shocked. However, we would still try our best to search for them, so please don't lose hope yet"

Despite the catastrophic event he just announced, he offered a small sympathizing smile.

"We shall head out now. Let us discuss these important matters when you're-- uhm, ready to" the other guy spoke as they stood up from where they sat. I tried to make a move to stand up, but my legs felt too shaky for it to support my body.

They bowed again, before they headed out the door. I sat there, still, trying to process everything that was relayed to me. Am I supposed to just suddenly accept that my parents were gone?
 

The door closing was like a switch, as I finally broke after it clicked close. I fisted my hair, and pulled it as I cried.

No, it’s not true. My parents aren’t gone. No.

“No, no, no, no, no" I uttered to my self, letting out a wrenched cry.

“Mom, Dad" I fell to my knees and sat on the floor, using my hands to support my body. I cried louder, to the point that I knew the maids could hear my cries.

Plane crash

They didn’t survive

The agent’s voice resonated in my head, worsening the feeling of pain I could feel squeezing my heart.

I screamed loudly, putting my head above my forehands, bowed.

I screamed and screamed, but I didn’t care the least bit if I could be heard by everyone.

“Miss?” a maid meekly called.

“Go away" I told her, raising my head to look at her.

“I said go away!” I screamed at her as she didn’t move from her spot the first time.

She scrambled away and left me alone. I screamed in agony, gathering my face with my palms.

What am I going to do? How am I going to live?

I didn’t know how long I stayed there, on the floor, weeping. But I must’ve been crying for so long, the next thing I knew, Yoojung was already with me. She put a soothing hand on my back, pulling me to lean on her, as my cries slowly died down.

“Shh… it’s okay. I’m here" she whispered, before I let the last of my tears fall and went off to slumber.

The next time I woke up, I was in bed and it was already dark. There was a tray of food laid on the night stand left for me, and a note that said:

Eat your dinner, I’ll come back soon

-Yoojung

I had no appetite but I had to eat, unless I wanted to kill myself with hunger.

I blankly ate the food, spoonful after spoonful, until I finally finished.

I pressed a button to summon a maid, and laid down to stare at the ceiling.

They’re gone.

The pain was back again, but my eyes already felt like it had nothing left to cry. Now I felt as if someone put a hole inside my soul, and made me feel weightless. I was empty.

“You called, miss?” a maid said, as she entered after knocking a few times.

“I’m done eating" I rasped.

She bowed in acknowledgement.

“And prepare a hot bath for me too" I added.

“Will that be all miss?” she asked.

I hummed in response, waving a hand to dismiss her.

She bowed again and left me in the room alone, returning a few moments later to notify me that the bath was ready.

I dragged my body from the bed, and continued doing so till I reached the bathroom. I silently locked the door behind me, sighing. I looked over to the bathtub filled to the rim with warm water, and a brief thought, or rather an idea, passed my mind. I immediately shook my head in refusal. I knew better than to do that.

Why did I even ask for a bath? I sighed.