I Loved By Myself, And Left By Myself

Unspoken Words

He could see them giving him curious stares as he passed by. He could hear their hushed whispers behind him, while their accusing fingers were pointing at him.

And he also knew there was only one question that was playing on their minds; why did he come back?

They thought he had left; gone for good. They thought he wouldn’t want to be around to witness this day; the day he would lose the love of his life.

But they didn’t know, he’d do anything for her. If she called for him once, he would put everything on hold just to attend to her. Even if it means, he was to get hurt in the process.

Yes. That was how much she meant to him.

The girl who had chosen to marry someone else.

Who wouldn’t even give him the chance to prove his love for her.

 Even with his eyes closed, he knew which room was hers. His feet wouldn’t lead him in the wrong direction. Everything about her was locked in his memory.

As he began to approach her room slowly, he braced himself for their first meeting; after how many months had passed.

Would she still have the same radiant smile on her face? Would she still look at him in awe with those curious eyes of her? Would she jump out of her seat and rush forward to welcome him back with a big hug?

He stopped in front of her room, by her doorway. That familiar feeling was coming back to him, everything was rushing back to him.

He had almost bolted out of there before she could see him but it was too late.

“Jong Hun?”

He froze for a second, unsure if he should just run away; like how he had before this. But something inside him told him to hold back. He had come all this way for one very important thing.

To smile sincerely for her on her special day.

Even though he had to use every ounce of his energy to do so.

“Hara.”

Slowly and painfully, his lips curved up into a smile. There was no reason for him to smile but just standing there and looking at her beautiful face was more than enough.

He hadn’t realised how much he had missed her until they were standing just a few feet away from each other. Until he had finally seen her again with his own two eyes.

“Jong Hun!” she called out a little more excitedly this time as she rushed forward and threw her arms around him. “You came!”

He was caught off guard but he quickly regained back his composure and slowly brought up his hands to touch her back.

She didn’t seem to realise his awkwardness and just continued to hug him tightly, not wanting to let go.

“You came,” she repeated, her voice cracking slightly this time. “I thought you wouldn’t.”

“You better not cry. Or you’ll smear mascara all over my suit,” Jong Hun joked lightly.

Having her back in his arms lifted up his spirits instantly. He felt a thousand times better than what he had been feeling for the last few months. The effect Hara had on him was priceless.

She managed a chuckled through her tears as she pulled away from him.

“Fool. Why didn’t you come back sooner?”

Wae? Would you need me even if I came back sooner?”

He could see the expression on her face becoming dark immediately and he knew he had hit a nerve.

“I mean, you would just distract me from the things I have to do,” he quickly turned the tables around.

She seems to accept his explanation and reached up her hands to touch his face.

“You are okay aren’t you? Didn’t you eat well?” she asked as she caressed his cheeks tenderly.

She was almost taking his breath away with just a simple touch. He had to stop her before he couldn’t let her go for the second time.

He reached up his own hands and laced them through her fingers as he brought them back down.

“I’ve been good. Just trying out a new diet,” he lied not wanting her to worry. “Are you all prepared for your big day today?”

“Yes. And with your presence here, everything is complete. You would come along for the ceremony right? Min Ho would be happy to see you there too.”

Min Ho.

Why? Why did she have to bring up his name? Didn’t she know it was heartbreaking enough to see her wearing a wedding dress which is not meant for him?

“I...just dropped by to congratulate you. I’d better get going now,” he excused himself from the burden.

“Jong Hun, wait,” she grabbed hold of his wrist.

Just then one of her bridesmaid came rushing into her room.

“Hara. We have a problem. Your wedding car hasn’t arrived yet. The driver called to say there is a slight problem.”

“What? But we’re supposed to head over there now. We’re running out of time,” she panicked.

“I’ll take you there.”

She looked up at him questioningly. Was he being serious? Just a moment ago he was trying to get out of there as fast as possible.

“Come on,” he gave her a warm smile. “We don’t want to keep the groom waiting right?”

She beamed excitedly at him. To have him her personally was like a dream come true. It was heart warming to have Jong Hun there beside her.

“Let’s go.”

 

“Goo Hara, why must you pick today out of all days to get married? Wae?”

“Choi Jong Hun, how was I supposed to know it was going to rain heavily today?” she shot back at him.

“Ah jinjja. The roads are slippery and I can’t see clearly with the rain keep pouring down on my windshield.”

“Should we stop somewhere for awhile?” her bridesmaid asked from behind.

“No. We can’t. They have been waiting for a long time. We can’t stop now,” Hara insisted.

Jong Hun cast a glance at her from the corner of his eye.

In other words, she didn’t want to keep Min Ho waiting. She couldn’t wait to be married to him. He tightened his grip on the steering wheel.

“Jong Hun, are you okay?” Hara asked worriedly, sensing the sudden change in him.

Nay. I’m okay. Don’t worry. I’ll get you there in time. Min Ho will be there waiting for you patiently,” he forced out a smile.

She leaned back against her seat at his assurance. A dreamy smile started to form on her face.

Jong Hun smirked in response. There was no doubt she was thinking of him.

Why was he still wasting his time here? Why didn’t he run away when he had the chance? Why did he...

“Jong Hun, look out!” Hara suddenly shouted from beside him.

He turned away from her just in time to see a sporty black car speeding straight towards them. The driver was going at full speed; there was no way he could stop in time.

In his attempt to try and swerve away, Jong Hun didn’t realise they were heading right towards a big tree.

He managed to step on the brakes, just before they crashed onto the tree.

“Hara!” he called out breathlessly. “Are you okay?”

He could see her shaking from the aftershock. He unfastened his seat belt and reached over to hold her close to him and give her warmness.

The moment she was safe in his embrace, the previous black car which was speeding; slammed hard onto their car resulting in them crashing into the same tree which they had managed to avoid.

The driver’s side was smashed up badly.

 

“Jong Hun...” Hara whimpered.

Yes. She was safe. She could feel blood trickling down her face but she was numb out from the pain.

Jong Hun. He was the one who mattered here.

She tried to sit up straight but it wasn’t easy with Jong Hun’s dead weight lying against her. She realised his arms was still wrapped tightly around her.

She had been safely protected in his arms. He had shielded her from the pain.

That was why she had escaped major injuries.

But what about him?

“Jong Hun...Wake up,” she called out desperately.

But there was still no response. Her heart rate was accelerating with every second.

“Jong Hun!”

Suddenly, she could feel his fingers moving slightly.

“Hara...” he breathed. “Are you...okay?”

“You’re alive! I’m okay. I’m okay Jong Hun. Hang in there. I’ll call for help okay?”

His thick red blood was already staining her white dress but she didn’t care. She had to get him help immediately.

But he rested his hand on top of hers to stop her from doing so.

“Hara...Listen to me...”

“Jong Hun, what are you doing? Let me go.”

“Nothing is going stop you from having your special day okay? You will...get married...You hear me?”

She nodded vigorously, desperate to do anything he asked of her now. That call, she has to make that call.

“Hara...” his voice was barely audible now.  “You know right...that I...”

She held him close to her as the tears streamed down her face incessantly. She wasn’t going to lose him. She wasn’t going to lose Jong Hun again when she had just gotten him back.

“I love you...”

His last three words for her; before he closed his eyes for the final time.

“Jong Hun!” she cried out. “Please, you can’t leave me. I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. Jong Hun, please forgive me. Wake up please. You have to wake up.”

But no matter how many times she screams out for him, he wasn’t going to come back.

Ever.

 

Note; this is the end for MinRaHun story :(

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Comments

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maknaejiren
#1
Jaejin T.T
chartreuse
#2
I read all the chapters in one night. Gosh it's 1AM now.
I really loved this fic. I loved how every story seemed connected to each other. And the endings... so sad T_____T
Wae Seunghyun had to die T_______T /obvious seunghyun-biased/
I enjoyed reading this fic. Like, you make me keep wanting for more that I cant stop reading.
Thumbs up! :D
chartreuse
#3
omgosh so I'm a new reader. :'D
I read a few chapters and I am in love with this fic T^T
I shall try to finish reading this 8D
And and I smiled like a dork when I found out you paired Key, Nicole & Jaejin. PERFECT CHOICE <3333
And seunghyun being heartless. I can imagine but I can't ;A;
Know what I mean? lol e____e
I don't make sense. But oh well.
I shall continue reading~~
LovelyHara #4
I searched this fic after reading at KH ~! This fic is the best~! I like it..Keep it up!
AyWany #5
I'm sooo late for this! <br />
Read this in a night, really love it!<br />
I almost cry reading this! Such a beautiful story,<br />
although i really hate that all my FTI boys dead....
KaiserKawaii #6
Whoo. at least my OnYeon got together. :( sad stories. poor Key.
daydreams_
#7
Love your story!<br />
It's absolutely one of the best fanfic I've ever read!
t0talkp0pgirl #8
I think you did well with the sad ending because u hav a sequel ^_^<br />
Update it here when u post it okay? :)<br />
I'll be waiting~! Thankyou for writing this story!
10apples
#9
T.T<br />
What a sad story. (except for OnYeon one)<br />
I'm waiting for the sequel. <br />
Be sure to update here when the sequel is ready!<br />
I love this story and I know I am going to love the sequel even more. (:
oxygenbubble
#10
I did indeed get pats the prologue, but I don't know much about FTIsland (accept SeungHyun - from maknae rebellion lol) which is why it took me a while to read. But I liked it! And I liked your sad endings! I'm glad there's a sequel. =)