When the taxicab pulled up to a cozy little cafe next to the Boston common, Chansung quickly paid for the taxi and ran to my side of the cab to open the door for me. What a gentleman. He took me by the hand and led me into the shop. I had no idea that coffee shops like this actually existed in America. You know... those coffee shops that are meant for couples, the ones that serve coffee that have foam hearts on top and have little pieces of paper that you can write couple wishes on. 

A waitress greeted us as we entered. She led us to a little table next to the window and handed us the drink list. After scanning the list, I chuckled.

"What? Is this a little too cheesy for you?" He asked self-consciously.

"A little. But strangely, I like it too."

The waitress came back and asked us if we were ready to order.

"Do you mind if I order for you?" He asked.

I shook my head.

"Two banana caramel coffees, please."

I smiled. He would. I looked out the window watching cars drive by. Across the road I could clearly see the Boston Common's lush green grass, unchanged since that time Taecyeon and I first had a fake date. I started to daydream and reminisce. The flowers that surrounded us as we sat on the bridge talking about family, school and relationships, still remained fresh in my memory. I was so deep in my daydream that when Chansung called my name, I thought for a second that it was Taecyeon.

"Hmm?" I looked at him.

"Do you want to go to the park after this?"

"Mmmhmm." I hummed back at him. 

When our coffees arrived, the aroma of the caramel and banana was so strong that my mouth began to water. I took a lady-like sip from the dainty pink mug, while Chansung watched me, warming his hands with the blue mug.

The waitress came back soon with a little slip of paper and two pens: one blue, the other pink. I guess we were to write something about our relationship on the paper? But what were we supposed to write? He and I weren't in that sort of relationship.

"What do you want to put on it?" I asked.

"Let's be different. Let's draw something," he suggested.

I began to doodle a girl with my pink pen. Once I finished, he drew a boy in blue, standing next to the girl-- holding her hand. The drawing looked extremely elementary. They were a little bit upgraded from the primary stick-figure, but it still looked quite childish. 

He laughed, "It's cute." He looked up at me, staring at me. My face grew hot again, knowing that he was staring at my face so intensely.

I looked up at him, and when our eyes met, he still didn’t look away. He continued to scan my face.

“You’re cuter, though.” He added.

My heart rate sped up and I looked away.

After writing “Tiffany & Chansung” under the little people and pinning the slip of paper on a chandelier type structure, he asked for the check and paid for it, though I insisted that we split it.

We walked around the common to look for a place to sit down. While we strolled along the pathways, Chansung and I talked about school, family and sports. Who am I kidding? I spoke most of the time, and he listened. He was a great listener. I told him about how my family put so much pressure on me to succeed and how I wasn’t sure why I was accepted to our school. I just felt like an idiot in all my classes. He kept comforting me and occasionally, he’d share an anecdote or story about his own personal experiences. It felt like we truly understood one another.

It was then, in the midst of the perfect atmosphere that I suddenly saw the white tent that Taecyeon and I hung out together in last night. My heart pounded, but this time it wasn’t because Chansung complimented me on something, or held my hand. Suddenly, I felt like I was somehow betraying Taecyeon. I know that Taecyeon doesn’t like me and that he doesn’t expect me to blindly crush on him, but after seeing the tent and remembering everything from last night, I felt a sudden rush of confusion and hatred for myself.

“What’s wrong?” He asked as he sensed my body tense up.

I tried to smile, but I guess it didn’t quite work the way I had wanted it to. He stepped in front of me, stopping me in my tracks. I looked up at his perfect face as he looked down at me.

What was I supposed to say? I didn’t want to hurt him by saying something insensitive like “Taecyeon and I were here together last night which is why I feel uncomfortable being here with you.” But the more I thought about it, the angrier I grew with myself and Taecyeon.

“Hey,” Chansung said calmly while running his fingers through my hair. “You know you don’t have to say it for me to know that this is about Taecyeon.”

Surprised at his comment, I couldn’t help but to let out a peep, “Hmm?”

His finger got caught in my hair pin. He pulled it out of my hair and fixed my hair for me so that it returned to its former state.

“Let’s just forget about him for today,” Chansung tried to suggest, but there was a tone of insecurity in his voice.

I nodded, still fuming, but calmed by his comfort that he understood the situation.

We spent the rest of the day walking around Boston, visiting little boutique shops and occasionally stopping at little vendors for snacks.

When we returned to campus, he walked me to my dorm and hugged me goodbye.  There were still sparks in his touch, but truthfully, it didn't have the same effect as Taecyeon’s. Right as Chansung was leaving, I saw Jay running towards the porch calling my name.

“Tiffany! Wait for me!”

Chansung stopped to see what this was all about, but Jay pulled me into the dorm before Chansung could ask what was going on.

“We really need to talk,” Jay whispered as we walked up to the faculty apartment for Jay to ask for permission to be in my room.

Jay sat me down on the comfy little couch in Nicole’s and my room.

“Did you just go on a date with Chansung?” Jay asked with a very strong tone.

“Umm… Yes?” I knew that Jay was mad, so I tried to act cute.

“What about Taecyeon??”

“He clearly doesn’t like me. He clearly never will. I clearly need to move on.” I grew more frustrated as I spoke.

“Tiffany, nothing is that clean cut. People’s feelings can change. You need to be more confident and stop giving up.”

“But, what am I supposed to do about Chansung? He likes me!”

“That doesn’t mean that you’re obliged to like him back.”

“I know, but I just feel really bad that I’m putting him through what Taecyeon is putting me through…”

“Did you tell Taecyeon about this?”

I squirmed in my seat.

“Well?”

“Yeah…” Oh God. He’s going to rip my head off.

Jay face-palmed and glared at me as soon as he removed his face from his hand. ‘

“I’m sorry! But he and I tell each other everything!”

He thought about it for a second then replied, “You know… we might be able to use this to our advantage.”

“How so?”

“You can use Chansung—“

“Use Chansung?? I’m sorry. I’m not that heartless, thanks. I’m a little confused too, Jay. Why are you so dedicated to making this work?”

“Because Taecyeon and I are really close friends, and you and I are also really close friends. I just really think you’d be the missing piece that Taecyeon’s always talking about.”

“He talks about a ‘missing piece’?”

“Yeah. I know it sounds cheesy, but he’s always talking about how everything in his life is great, except it still feels like something is missing.”

Maybe I was his missing piece, but maybe I’m giving myself too much credit.

“What about other girls? Can’t they also fill that empty space?”

“I don’t think so, Tiffany. There’s a difference between being with someone who you share a superficial relationship with versus someone who you really do have a special connection with.”

I was silent.

“Taecyeon said it himself. He’s never been so close with a girl and had the same chemistry with a girl as he’s had with you. I think he’s just too scared of losing you if something bad were to happen in a relationship, but that’s just my theory.”

“It makes sense,” I murmured. I ran my hands through my hair. Though it took me a while at first, I eventually realized that my special hairpin was missing. . I must’ve lost it somewhere in the park. That .

“I’ve got to go and practice basketball before try-outs next week. You should probably go and swim or something.”

“Mmm…” I nodded. I had almost forgotten about swimming.

“I’ll see you later. Don’t give up, okay?”

I nodded. Jay patted my head and showed himself the way out. I guess I should go and swim or something. It’ll take my mind off of this drama.

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yellowbee