Promotions start today. My first live performance will be at Mnet along with all the other artists promoting their comebacks. But even with all the inevitable pressure as a rookie, I made a promise to myself: I will get out alive. It's always easiest at times like these to cave in and give up. I started planning out proper meals to give me energy for my schedule, and also made sure to find time during the day to be with Johnny. WIth Nahyun and Tayong's betrayal still like a fresh wound, I wasn't ready to trust anyone so soon. Although I made that clear to Johnny, he said he would wait for me.

"You have every right to be wary, to be cautious around me. For all you know, I could just be another Taeyong helping you for my own benefits. But I was serious when I told you that I'll gain your trust. That includes helping you, in any way possible, to reach your goal. I want you to live safely and happily, Kiara," Johnny smiled, reaching for my hand. I pulled away, instantly regretting it when the hurt was obvious on his face. Even so, Johnny put on a brave face for me.

"Taeyong said something like that too awhile ago..." I said, looking away.

"Then how about I show you? If anything's wrong, I'll be the first one to run to you. Even if nothing has happened at all and you just want to talk about how you had a nice day, I'll listen to you," Johnny grinned.

"What the..." I scoffed at his cheesiness, "are you professing your undying love for me or something? Why so dramatic, geez,"

"Do you want me to?"

"Psh whatever! I'll...think about calling you if something happens. But if you don't come, you're dead! Especially after giving that long sappy speech about proving yourself to me," I raised my hand, pretending to threaten him. Johnny feigned panic, holding both hands up in a surrender.

"Yes ma'am,"

*                                    *                                     *

The music show buildings were only a couple minutes drive away from SM, but idols were expected to get there as early as 4:00 pm to start preparing for the evening show. I was getting my hair dyed again, this time to a warm toned brown. It's quite sad actually. My hair used to be my favorite feature. I'd always get compliments on how my natural hair softly framed my face, silky to the touch. But with all the dye chemicals soaking in my scalp, visible split ends and crimpled pieces always stuck out nowadays. 

"Your hair looks lovely Kiara," Johnny said, pulling me out of my depressing thoughts. I held up a strand for him to see.

"Not really. Can't you see all the split ends? The stylist said my hair was so damaged they were cutting a lot of it off after it gets dyed," I sighed.

"Split ends? Where? I see a beautiful girl getting her hair dyed. That's it," he grinned.

"Psh, such a flatterer. Don't you have to be somewhere? Or did your manager not schedule anything for today?" I asked. Rookies are always busy. If they have any free time, it would be spent practicing a dance routine or working on vocals.

"I told Manager Kim that I was really sick, so he let me tag along with you tonight for your debut performance," he said casually, as if he told me what he had eaten for lunch, "plus, it's not like anyone else is here to support you. I just thought you'd like for me to be here,"

Of course, Johnny was right. Everyone else is busy doing their own schedules, living their own lives. I wonder if mom and dad are going to watch me on tv tonight. I wonder if they'll be proud of their daughter.

"Wow, I'm touched by how you're my most loyal fanboy," I said sarcastically. The stylist emerged to rinse out the dye and blowdry my very-much-dead hair, if it can still be called that.

"Since we're cutting your hair, I was thinking something really short and cute. You've had your hair long your entire life right? So how about a change for once?" the stylist gushed, a little too enthusiastic.

"Um, not too short please," I said, measuring below the chest, "about here?"

The stylist nodded. But of course, like all hair dressors, she chopped off much more than what we agree on.

"Just a little more okay? It still looks a bit uneven,"

"Oh, now the left side is longer than the right! Let me just fix that..."

"How about a little shorter? You still have a lot of split ends that you need to get rid of,"

By the time Johnny and I left the salon, I looked like your typical 4-year old asian with a bowl cut that framed my face in the most unflattering way possible: my hair was chopped was jaggedly cut around the edges, the bangs were cut far too short, and my self esteem fell to the floor the same time my hair did. 

"It looks awful Johnny. I'm too embarrased for you to look at me," I cried, avoiding his eyes.

"Yeah, I'm not going to lie on this one. I think the salon lady was out to get you or something...how did she do that badly? SM needs to find a new place for us to get styled at," Johnny laughed, trying to make light of the situation.

"What am I going to do? I can't on stage like this! Oh my gosh, the first rule to gaining popularity is to not be ugly, and that plan is already soiled-" 

"Shhhh shhhh," Johnny pressed a finger against my lips, "it'll be okay. I know someone who can fix this. And don't panic. You're hair doesn't look terrible, it just...needs some fixing. I'll take you to a really good salon, then we'll get back in time for the music show,"

As it turns out, Johnny's mom owns a salon on the far east side of Seoul. To my surprise, it was bustling with regulars who trusted Johnny's mom as though they were trusting someone with their lives. The salon wasn't nearly as large or as fancy as the one SM hired, but nonetheless it was cozy like a home.

"There's an emergency omma," Johnny called as we came rushing in. His mother stared at us wide-eyed, not expecting to see her son so soon. 

"Omo! What happened to her hair?!" she gasped, horrified.

"This lady completely trashed it, and we need to get her back to mnet two hours before the show. Can you help her?" Johnny asked, but his mother was already a step ahead. 

"The way I see it...whoever cut your hair was very skilled. She has years of experience under her belt, but cut your hair sloppily on purpose. Did you personally wrong her miss? Stylists usually won't tarnish their reputation unless they had some ulterior motive to do so,"

I shook my head. "I never met that unni in my life,"

Johnny's mom sighed, seating me in a nearby chair. "Well, what's done is done. Now, let's see how we can fix this mess,"