A/N:

I have thought about this for quite a while now and I came to the decision to end the story where it is right now.

One reason is that I want to end it before it turns bad or boring, but there's another reason why. To explain that I'll have to go a little back in time and talk about why I started this story in the first place.

I had the idea for this story, because I felt the need to deal with the feelings for my own personal 'Jimin'. Back then I was still in the middle of it and it was chaotic. I wanted to write this story to cope with my feelings for him and the things that happened between us.

So I wrote about 3 chapters and then I had to stop, because it was too hard. I just couldn't. And it took a while until I was ready again. I'm not even sure where it suddenly came from, but out of the blue I wanted to pick this story up again and I did. And never ever would I have expected it to turn out the way it did, nor how many loyal and caring readers I would gain. I'm so happy and thankful for all of you guys, that supported me, believed in me and identified themselves with what I wrote.

There are many more things that happened between my 'Jimin' and me that I didn't write into the story and frankly, I never expected the story to make the turns it did, but I'm happy about them.

But I'm gonna be honest with you. The thing between him and me did not lead to a happy end. At least not for me.

When I knew he was having something going on with 'Cara' I distanced myself and started to ruin the friendship we'd had. I didn't want to, I cherished our friendship, but it all hurt too much.

Some time after, our whole grade went on a school trip to Italy and for about a day we were tip-toeing around each other and I felt that he was trying to talk to me, so one evening when we both arrived for dinner we approached each other straightly. He said: “We should meet up and talk later.” and I agreed. We went to our separate tables and later on that evening, we met up at his bungalow. I knew there was no chance for anything more than a friendship anymore, because I knew what was going on between him and 'Cara'. They both talked to me about their feelings and I knew I was out, but I thought maybe it could save our friendship if we had an honest talk.

I think we sat on his bed for about 5 minutes until any one of us finally spoke up. We talked a lot, about us, our friendship, about how things had changed and why, but I wasn't as honest as I should have been.

He asked me if I had feelings for him and I said no. It had been my chance to confess, but I couldn't. I didn't want to ruin us any further and I didn't see a reason for it, because I had no chance anyway. I returned the question and asked him if he ever had any feelings for me and he said no.

We both thought our friendship could turn back to normal after that, that we could be close again, but it didn't work out the way we hoped and we just gradually distanced ourselves from each other.

I had no happy end. He and 'Cara' made it official after a while and they were a couple for almost 2 years before they broke up and went their separate ways. He's living god knows where now, going to college. He doesn't know I loved him and I am pretty sure I'm never gonna see him again, but it's fine, because I think I am finally over it. Writing this story and creating a happy end, helped me cope.

When I think back, I feel bittersweet, but looking back now, I'm glad I had that friendship with him. That kind of friendship where we were there for each other, where we were close enough that we would hug and cuddle and secretly hold hands during class when we were sitting next to each other.

It was short, but intense and I'll never forget it.

When I think back now, I am glad that he was my first kiss and I'm glad it happened the way it did. He told me I was beautiful the way I was and that there's nothing wrong with my body and you can believe me when I say that meant a whole lot to me and I know he meant it.

I will always think about him when I hear a certain song and he'll forever be my first kiss, but I think I finally found some closure, because I turned it into something good.

So I think this is the point where I should stop, because that chapter of my life is over now.

I hope I didn't ruin the story for you with this, but I wanted to be honest and open up about the story.

I really really loved all of you readers so much and every single comment made me so happy.

You are the one and only reason I carried on and kept writing.

So all that's left for me to say now is a big fat “Thank you!”

<3