When you are next to probably the most beautiful woman in all of Korea, you find yourself subconciously comparing. As we are sitting in Myungsoo's lounge, I stare at her longingly. Her hair is long and wavy, though it's naturally straight. I know from her old pictures. She has highlights and lowlights, and perfect layers. I have hair that is longer, naturally curly and tied into a bun at the top of my head. Where Yunji is thin, yet curvy, I am thin enough that it is unattractive, evidence of a poverty-stricken family.

As Myungsoo hands me a plate filled with strawberry cake, he flashes me a look. His face is as unreadable as it always is. Is it panic on his face? Or apology? I lift the fork up to my lips, letting the sweet taste of the strawberry cream rest on my lips. Yunji isn't eating, apparently she's on a strict diet. She sighs, looking around the room. L removed most of the pictures of her, but there are a few remaining. She picks up one, where she's laughing at absolutely nothing. At the time, her laugh lines look so natural, so right, like a young child. Now, her face is matured. The smile she wears is the one that she's practiced a hundred times in front of a camera.

Yunji looks up at Myungsoo, a sly smile on her face. "You kept this? My hair was so ugly back then."

If she's talking about her choppy cut, she must be blind. The hair suited her face perfectly, curved inwards just below her shoulders. I stare at the picture, looking over Yunji's shoulders, and words fly out of my mouth before I have a chance to stop them. "You looked beautiful."

Yunji looks over at me, a smile creeping up on her face. "You are very sweet. I understand why Myungsoo likes spending all his time with you."

I blush at that thought, but L's face remains cold. "What are you even doing here?" he growls.

The brown-headed beauty looks down, her hair covering part of her face. I remember doing that the first day when Myungsoo looked back at me. Only when Yunji does it, she looks like a princess. "I missed you," she whispers.

I feel like leaving the room, as if I've intruded on a lover's quarrel. But Yunji remains seated, and I try to sink into the couch fabric. Their conversations pick up like any old couple in a fight.

Yeah, well I missed you these past few years/I didn't want to leave you/But you did/I came back/It's not enough

I rise awkwardly, prepared to make my exit. "I think I'll leave now..." Before I have a chance to push the door open, I can hear L following after me. He slams the door shut, the echoes of Yunji's sobs still ringing crystal clear.

"Can we walk?" he says, running towards the nearest park. I nod silently.

The place where I met the little boy looks the same as before. The same pale sheet of white covers the grass, the swingset and the playground. Children run around, scampering, throwing snowballs and making snowmen. We walk slowly, as if time is endless. Finally, we reach the bench, where I met the boy. I wonder where he is.

Myungsoo's head is in his hands. He looks frustrated, more so than usual. Kicking the snow, I watch in silence as he releases his anger.

"Are you okay..?" I ask, timidly.

"Yes. No. I don't know." He groans. "Have you ever been in love?" he says, looking straight at me. My heart does flips and turns, banging into my rib cage. For a minute I'm stunned. Is he really that stupid?

"Yes," I mumble softly. "I have."

"And you know that person doesn't love you back, but you can't help it anyway?"

I nod.

"That's how I feel with Yunji. She'll make me feel special, happy, she'll entertain me for as long as she has time. And then, she'll leave again. She comes and goes as she pleases, not giving a second though to the people she toys with."

"I...I understand." The world seems black and white. I love a fool who loves another fool. Fate seems very alike to Yunji. Toying with people, playing with them for as long as they feel like it. Is fate that restless? Am I that fun to tease? Somewhere in the sky, the Gods treat me like a dog. A form of entertainment, my life is a joke. It hurts listening to the perfect boy complaining about the perfect girl. It hurts alot. Especially when you love that perfect boy.

I've only met Yunji for half an hour, I've only heard a few minor details about her. But instantly I know what kind of girl she is. If I am the strange one, the girl who is lonely and quiet and slow, she is the opposite. Instantly, I know that Yunji is that girl. The one who wakes up with perfect hair, who is naturally beautiful. That girl who you can't help but love, you can't help but be furiously jealous of her. 

And as I blink away the falling snow, as I stare into the eyes of that mysterious boy, my mind spins. Instantly, I know that I would give up the hair, body, personality, smile, eyes, clothes, everything, if only I had that one boy who's heart belongs to her. 

"We should be getting back now," I say, swallowing. "My grandfather will worry."

Myungsoo nods. "I know. But thanks for today."

"Can I ask you a question?"

We're walking back now, slowly. Two shadows that are barely touching. One yearning, one stepping away. "Go."

"Why do you only carry that one, specific picture of Yunji with you everywhere?"

A long silence passes between. We've reached the front of my house, and just when I'm sure he won't answer, he finally speaks. "Her smile."

short chapter, I'll update soon! dun dun daaaaa dunnnnnnn.

Am I the only one who missed the cats drastically? D: dnw, they'll be in the next chapters! this is a CAT's love story after all.