Chapter 11:  I’m a fool   

“Ji Hyo-ah... Ji Hyo-ah”

He woke up from his long and bad dream. The dream where she was hates him, in the dream where she had leaved him forever. Said her hatred word to him, said her cursed that broken his heart to pieces. And he was cried, without ashamed he pleading to her not to leaved him, he kept called her name but she just walked away. Walked and walked away until she disappeared to the darkness, leaved him crushed alone to the ground... leaved him for good.

How he wished that was all only a dream... his bad dream.

But he knew it doesn’t... in reality she really had hated him, she had leaved him.

The tear rolled again in his eyes, dropped to the hospital wardrobe that he wore.

Although that still he believed in her, he knew it’s all because she can’t accept his love to her.  Even if she asked him to forget his love he willing as long she return back to him. He won’t mind if his love only a sided, he won’t mind if he will crush to saw her with others but to loose her - he can’t bare it. He is willing if they just be a friend...forever.

So, with the last hope he picked his phone on the side table dialled her number again. Like since the things happen, his call was leaved unattended until it goes to her mailbox. He kept on call to umpteenth time till his thumb felt numb - but alas still the same. Frustrated, he threw his phone to the wall, unable to accept what had happen. His sob clearly heard inside the silent room.

Toss out the medical tube that attached to his vein, he dropped from his bed and walked outside. The liquid of blood flowed from his hand due to tube but received care less from him. It flowed down along his arm until dropped on the floor along his walk.

From one step to another he climbed and climbed in his blank mind. For each step of the stairs his tears can’t stop flowing, his mind and mouth can’t stop from remembering her. From one level to another he climb, his breath felt weighted and he was chocked by his own tears.

“Ji Hyo-ah... Ji Hyo-ah... mianhe”

And only her name that he kept chanted like it can gave him strength. But only the pain he received in his heart, bleed as been stabbed by a thousand knifes.  The voice of her curses recalled in his mind.

At the bench under the big tree he was waited there alone at the park as she had promised with Tae Hyun. It was almost an hour he waited there but the woman never appeared, and he kept on waited. Even the hot sun of the spring or Tae Hyun’s persuasion didn’t bounce him from his seat. He believed she will come - no matter how many hour he would waited.

The sun was extremely hot that day like mocked him. His head again started to felt heavy and pain, his body are hot but he was trembling cold. Even the black sweater that he wore can’t bare his coldness. His sight started to felt blurry but he strengthened himself. He was hoped and prayed she would come. And maybe the heaven still had pity on him, a slightly minute after she came with her working attire. He believed she was in her lunch hour and the park was nearest to her work place.

“What you want to talk about?” she said in her crossed arm, sneer can be read from her eyes.

 “Ji Hyo-ah, why are you like this, what wrong I had done?” he reached his hand tried to hold her, but it just hanged in the air as he looked her expression. She even didn’t look to him, like he was disgusting in her eyes.

“What you had done? Oh my god what a shame of you” her hand swap to her hair disbelieved what she had heard, as much she tried to control her anger. And he just looked to her behaviour in his innocent look – which much turn her to fume.

“So since you’re look innocently confuse let’s me told you. First, stop your ridiculous act... do you think it funny? Hey, I already knew all your secrets. Do that to gain my love? Hahahaha truly that was the cheapest, silliest ways that I ever heard...”

“But Ji Hyo-ah, only that solution I had... but I didn’t do that to gain your love. It’s coz I want to help you” he replied, misunderstood the situation... thought she was talking about his house that he lend to her. Added more oil to the fire.

“So what about your confession? It’s also a lie?” she asked turned him to devastated. Fastest he denied, which leaved him with her chuckle.  “I do love you, Ji Hyo