“Why do you like frequenting the church?”

“Because we’re all sinners.” I told her. “We should learn to pray and ask forgiveness for our sins.”

“Do you think we’ll go to heaven when we die?”

“You would probably, but not me.”

“But you pray more often than I do.”

 

 

 

“Any last words?” I ask the man who’s now on his knees crying and begging me for his dear life.

“P-please, s-spare my life. I-I can give you m-money. Just p-please---”

*BANG*

His body fell on the floor as blood come out from his head where I shot him.

“You talk too much.” I quickly sent a message stating that I just finished my mission.

I went out of the dead man’s hotel room and out the building like nothing happened. Just another night of work. I check my watch and it’s almost 8:00.

“Gotta hurry.” I whispered to myself. I went to an alley nearby where I placed my bag earlier near a dumpster. Since the place is dark and deserted I quickly change into a casual suit and tie and wear my glasses and threw away the clothes I used awhile ago.

 

KRYSTAL’S POV

 

She’s already 23 minutes later, not that I’m counting. We’re celebrating Vic-unnie’s birthday in a grill house, her treat. Everyone already started eating but me. I want to wait for her.

“Don’t starve yourself, Krys. Eat now. The meeting she was in took longer than expected.” Luna said.

“I’m fine unnie. I’m gonna wait for Amber a little more. She’s already near she said in her text.” I said to her with a smile.

“Why don’t just the two of you admit your feelings to each other?!?!” Sulli exclaimed.

“I-I don’t have feeling for her, she’s just my b-bestfr—“

“Don’t give me that best friend bull , Krys..” Sulli teased. “We’re all best friends here but the two of you treats each other differently.” They all laughed and I just let my hair cover my face because I know I’m blushing.

“I-I don’t think she has f-feelings for me you know..” I said, sadly. “H-has she ever mentioned something maybe about me??” I ask the three of them.

“Well, not really. She’s never vocal about for feelings. And amongst all of us, she’s the most mysterious. You know what I mean?” Vic-unnie said and we all nodded. “But you know what they say.. Action speaks louder than words.”

 

“Hi, sorry I’m late!” Amber arrived and took her seat next to me.

“Yey! Hyung’s here!!” Sulli shouted.

“Caught up with work?” Vic-unnie ask her.

“Yeah. I was drowning from paper works and meetings.” She said.

“Eat now, Koala. You look tired.” Luna said.

I was just looking at her the whole time and saw her forehead is covered in sweat, she must’ve ran to get here. I took my handkerchief from my pocket and pressed it against her forehead.

“You’re all covered in sweat.” I told her as I continue to wipe away the sweat from her face. She faced me so I could wipe her easily. I know she’s now staring at me but I don’t care, I like it.

“I sprint from the train station to get here faster. I know you’d wait for me, I don’t want you to get too hungry.” She said as I wipe some sweat from her neck.

“You should bring a small towel and just not let the sweat dry off.” I said to her.

“I have you to do it, don’t I?” She said. I look at her and we’re just looking at one another.

 

“Wow! This beef is really good.” Sulli half shouted to get our attention. “We should all start eating now!” She said and we just all laugh.

 

After eating, we said our goodbyes. Luna and Sulli went home together since they both take the same route, vic-unnie went to her car and waved goodbye while me and Amber are left.

“Will you take the train?” She asks.

“Yes.”

“Cool, me too. Let’s go.”

We alight in the train and since it’s crowded both of us were pushed into a corner. I leaned my back to the wall while Amber is beside me. When we reach the next station more people are alighting the train and It’s making me feel uncomfortable with all the bodies of stranger colliding bumping with yours. I saw a erted looking man trying to stand on the space in front me. Oh no, I said to myself. Before he could even reach the spot I Amber stood in front of me. Thank God.

“It’s a little crowded in here.” She said and I just smiled at her, thankful. Since people are still pushing and squeezing into spaces Amber put her arms beside me as if securing my own personal space. She was pushed to me causing our bodies to draw nearer to each other and my initial reaction was to hold onto her coat collar.

“Sorry.” She said, our faces inches away.

“I-it’s okay. I don’t mind as long as it’s you.” I said. I’m such a flirt! I said to myself. “L-let me just hold onto you for support.” I said and she just nodded cutely.

 

She’s looking at me, I know. I can feel her eyes.

“Stop staring.” I said to her, finally meeting her stare.

“What can I do? I’m facing you, you’re beautiful, what’s not to stare?” She said. Oh my God! My heart is beating so loud I’m afraid she might hear it.

“Are you flirting with me, Liu??” I . Please say yes!!

“Your eyes are beautiful did you know that? And your lips. Oh God, those lips.” She said while biting hers.

“Are you drunk? I think you had quite a lot of soju awhile ago.” I and laugh. God, I wish she’s always drunk.

“Thank God for the alcohol I guess.” She said and we both giggled. As more people alight the train the more closer our bodies get.

“I’ve always wonder how those lips of yours taste like. I bet they taste like strawberries since I always see you putting some lip gloss..” She’s a talker with some alcohol in her system. “Or maybe they taste like pure sweetness like sugar, maybe honey.”

“You talk too much when you’ve got alcohol in your body.” I told her. “Why don’t you just taste them yourself?” I said quite boldly.

“You know what, Maybe I will..” She said. She slowly leans in closer. “I bet they taste so sweet like my favorite chocolates..” She whispered. I pulled her coat closer.

“Just kiss me, Liu.” And without any second to waste she kissed my lips and it’s everything I’ve ever hoped for. Her lips are so soft with a taste of alcohol. I don’t care if we’re on a freaking train or if anyone is watching us, let them watch for all I care. I just want to live on this very moment.

She pulled away a little, smiling. “I’ve never had anything like the taste of your lips. You’re lips taste like the clouds and the sweetest dream I can only imagine.” She said. “I don’t think I can ever get enough.” Her words are melting my heart, I almost want to cry.

“What a sweet talker.” I said to her and attempt to playfully punch her chest but she caught my hand and brought it to her lips and kissed the back of it. She got my other hand that’s still on her coat, she circled both my hands around her neck and kissed me again. She put her hands on my waste and this time we’re moving our lips in sync with each other. She bit my lower lip a little and I opened my mouth to let her in. We’re in our own little world when I heard the PA system that we reach out station.

“Here’s our stop.” I told her in between kisses. She smiled against my lips and took my hand as we get off the train.

 

 

AMBER’S POV

 

I felt happy, for once. I was finally able to express my feelings for her. I went home with a smile on my face. I walk her to her apartment and may have possibly made out with her outside her door. For once, I felt genuinely happy.

I enter my own apartment, hanging my coat on a rack and saw a piece of paper on my table. I don’t remember leaving any paper when I left. I walk closer, got the paper and read it. .

“I GOT EYES EVERYWHERE.YOU AINT GOING ANYWHERE. END YOUR MINI ROMANACE. MAYBE, HER LIFE WILL BE SPARED.       –The Boss”

My knees weakened after reading the paper and I fell to the ground. Why am I so stupid!??!?! I put her life in danger because of my own stupidity, because of my selfishness, because of what I feel. When will I be happy? If my fate is to live alone just so she can be safe then so be it. For a brief moment, I forgot the most important rule my work required; NEVER DEVELOP FEELINGS WITH ANYONE. When I was younger I believed that no one was capable of loving me. I wasn’t the most likeable person nor the most interesting to be with. People always hated me for I how I look and how I act. I came from a broken family and because of all that I joined the organization I am working for now. Somehow, I felt significant when I joined. The adrenaline and the actions excites me. In here, I was one of the best. When I was training to be an assassin, I quickly got all the forms, stance, routines and techniques. It made me happy, or so I thought that was happiness. As I grow older I felt emptier by the day until I was numb and wasn’t able to feel emotions, it was part of the process I guess, for us to be emotionless.

I started being an assassin when I was 18 and now I’m 24. A year ago, I was assigned here in Seoul by the organization. I’m responsible in most assassination that happens here. I have a ‘day-job’ for a cover up. There, I met Luna and through Luna I met the rest of the gang. At first, I was just using them as a part of the cover up for having a normal life. Slowly, I felt attached to each and everyone of them, especially her. I guess I let my guard down and thought I was just really normal as long as I accomplish missions and live a double life. I was very wrong.

 

Weeks pass and I ignore everyone including her. I know she’s hurt that I’m constantly ignoring her calls and invitations. Who wouldn’t be hurt right? After I kiss and flirt with her now I’m ignoring her. I just stare at all the notifications of her in my phone. 57 missed calls and 83 messages. I want to talk to her and hear her voice even for just a second. I want to tell her all the feelings I have for her, confess to her that I’m madly in love with her. I want to hold her close and kiss her all day long. I smiled bitterly at myself. “Dream on, kid.” I told myself.

 

I still do every mission I was tasked to do. I even accept more to keep myself busy and avoid thinking about her. It’s now 8.30 and I just finished a mission. It’s still early so I went to the church, a thing I always do after finishing a mission early. There aren’t many people at this time so I took seat near the altar. I really just sit when I’m in a church, it made me think that maybe my sins will be washed away if I come here. As I sit her face came to my mind again, and this time I prayed. I fall to my knees and clenched my hands together. I closed my eyes and prayed. “God, I know you’re real. I’m a sinner and have no rights to ask a favor from you. But please, just please keep her safe always. Keep her away from harm even from me and always protect her. I love her, oh God, I love her. B-but if safety means me being away from her promise me, God, that You will keep her safe and happy. I promise to be away from her so she can have a normal life just keep her safe. Amen.” I said as my prayer not noticing that I was already crying. I took a seat back and wiped my tears away.

“I knew you would be here.” I heard a voice. It was her standing in the isle.

“W-what are you doing here??” I ask her as she took a seat beside me.

“Y-you’re not answering my calls or replying to my messages. I went to your work place but Luna said you’ve been absent for weeks. So I tried my luck and hoped that you’d be here. Guess I’m right.” She said looking at the altar.

“I-I should go.” I said and was about to get up.

“Stay please, don’t leave me.” She said as she held my hand and look into my eyes. Slowly I went back to where I was seating.

“What did you talk about with God?” she asks as she looks at me, still holding my hand.

“I talked to God about you.” I answered honestly.

“Really?” She smiled. ”What did you tell Him?”

“I told Him to keep you safe..”

“That’s nice.” She said with a sincere smile.

“.. even from me.” I finished.

“What do you mean?” She asks, confusion all over her face.

“Nothing. Forget about what I said.”

“But---“

*RING* both our phones ring and I got up and answered it in a corner noticing it was form the organization. I have another mission tonight.

“Hey, Krys. I gotta go. I uh, have an emergency from work.” I told her.

“Yeah, me too. I have a late dinner meeting with a client.” She said. “W-we’ll still meet, right??” she asks with hopeful eyes.

“If God permits.” I told her and left.

 

 

 

I’m in an alley near a restaurant where my target is. I’m waiting for a message signaling me to proceed inside the restaurant. After a few minutes, the message came and I fixed the silencer for my gun. This one’s supposed to be easy. Wearing all black, I walk into the back door of the restaurant and went straight to the toilet where my target is supposed to be. I enter the wash room and wash my hands on the sink. A few seconds later a middle-aged woman came out a cubicle. After drying my hands, I just simply pointed the gun on her head and shoot. Unknown to me a certain girl entered the wash room and was able to see the whole thing. Krystal. She stood there in shock and I was just as shocked as her. I don’t know what to do so I just drag her out of the wash room pass the back door and back at the alley. She’s still in shock when we reach the alley. For me? I’m slowly accepting the fate that she’s going hate and despise me for the rest of our lives.

 

“Y-you, you just killed a human.. A freaking human being..” She said

“I guess you’re bound to know anyway.” I said.

“A-are you, will you.. me…” She stuttered.

“What, no! I-I’m not going to kill you or harm you. O-okay?” I assured her.

“I-is this the reason w-why you don’t return my calls??” She asks and I just nodded.

“Y-you’ll be in grave danger if you continue feeling for me. I-I’m just gonna say it for closure, I guess, that y-you and m-me can never be together no matter how much we want each other. I’m sorry for kissing you and making you believe that I can give you the love you deserve. B-because I can’t. I’m not capable of loving someone freely and I grew up to believe that nobody is capable of loving me. A-and I think I’m just going to live with that..” I told her as I try to keep myself from crying. “You..” I look at her with all the love I have. “You can do so much more. You will continue to succeed in your life. And you will do greater things without me. I’m a nuisance and I will just weigh you down. You will soon meet a man who can give you everything and before that time comes you have to forget about me. It won’t be that hard to f-forget someone like me, I assure you. And for the record, this is the reason why I always go to church, to ask God for forgiveness and ask Him to keep you safe.” I said to her. She’s crying, I want to wipe her tears away but I can’t.

“This is goodbye. Take care, Krystal Jung.”

 

 

 

 

KRYSTAL’S POV

 

She disappeared into our lives like bubbles. She left no trace of herself. She resigned from her company, moved out of her apartment and disabled any contacts. I ‘m having my morning coffee as I read the daily newspaper. ‘Another body found dead by the river’ the headline stated. “It must be her.” I told myself. After work, I always go to the church hoping maybe I can see her there but she never came.

It’s a Friday night and I’m in a church just sitting and reflecting. My phone ringed and the number was unknown.

“Hello.” I answered.

“Is this Krystal Jung?”

“Did is she. Who is this?”

“I’m Kim Taeyeon. I’m a co-worker of Amber. If you know what I mean.”

“Y-yes. I understand what you’re saying.” I told her.

“Look, Amber is my friend I think she deserve a life better than this. Now answer me, do you love her?”

“Of course, yes. I love her.” I answered her right away.

“I have a plan to get her life out of its hole.”

 

 

 

 

AMBER’S POV

 

Tonight will be the last night I will ever kill a person. After this mission is finished, I too will be finished. I suit up for my mission tonight. The location is a manor in the middle of nowhere where a rich gambler lives and owes my boss a big some of money. This should be easy. I load my car with tanks I will be needing for tonight. I don’t a gun for this last mission.

I reach the location and park my car from a distance. I carried with me tanks of gas. This is going to be lit.

 

I stealthily got inside the manor and search the house for my target.  I went to room which I believe is his office and saw him there.

“Good evening Mr. Choi. The boss sends his regards.” And with that, I threw a lighter out his window where I poured gas around the house awhile ago. Lights and brightness was the last thing I saw. Goodbye cruel word.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ouch. I tried moving my body but it hurts and stings. I felt a hand holding my hand. I tried opening my eyes but the brightness stings my eyes. I wriggled my fingers and I think the hand holding mine felt it.

“Amber? Amber! I’m calling the nurse.”  The voice said.

Slowly my eyes adjusted to the brightness and her face is the first thing I saw.

“K-krystal??”

“Yes, It’s me.” She said and grab my hand.

The nurse came checking up on me and explained to me that I got burns and some bone dislocation. I’m still going to be just fine she said and left.

Krystal help me adjust my back so I could see her clearly.

“H-how did I get here??” I ask her.

“Taeyeon..” She said.

“That midget..” I hissed.

“Apparently, she knows you so well that she figured out what you were supposed to do.” She said.

“I should’ve burned in that house.” I told her.

“Shut up.  You’re not dying and you’re not going anywhere unless I say so.” She told me authoritatively.

“You know you can’t do that, Krystal..” I told her. I hate this reality.

“Oh yes I can.” She said.

“What??” I ask her confusedly. “They will look for me. You will be in danger. They will only stop if I’m dead.” I told her.

“Well, you are dead.” She said.

“What?? Is this heaven?? Are you St. Peter??” I joked.

“No, silly. You’re dead to them. Taeyeon called me and said she has a plan. She followed you to the manor and rescued you. She replaced your body with a corpse from a morgue and made it look like it was you who got burned and died but in fact it was the corpse. While I waited for you in this hospital. Thanks God her plan worked.” She explained.

“D-does that mean. They won’t be looking for me anymore?” I ask, I’m in shock.

“Yes.” She said happily.

“Does that mean I can love you now?” I ask her.

“Of course!”  She said and gently embraced me.

“We’re going to start a new life together. We’ll forget this place and move to the states to start fresh. Taeyeon gave me all the things we need. Your new ID and all the papers needed. Me, my company will transfer me to the states since we have a new office there. And I want you with me, never leaving my side and my sight.” She told me.

“You can do music in the states. Taeyeon told me that you’ve always loved music.”

“Am I dreaming?” I ask her. “This is all too good to be true.”  I said.

“It’s true and it’s happening.” She assured me.

“Have I ever told you that your eyes are beautiful?” I aid to her.

“Yes.” She said our faces inches away.

“Have I ever told you I love you?” I said to her with all my heart. “Because Krystal Jung, all of my heart belongs to you. Thank you for loving me and accepting me. I want to leave all the past behind and start a new life where your love is my assurance and my lifeline. Where home is wherever you are and where happiness is spending all the struggles and good fortunes with you. I love you, Krystal Jung.” I said to her.

“I love you too, Amber Liu.” She said and kissed my lips.