I walk along the corridors of the school. People started parting like I'm Moses who's about to pass thru the Red Sea.

I turned right to head to the cafeteria when a school nerd who was wearing some big horrendous glasses was blocking my way. He was looking at some of his notes in his notebook.

He noticed  that the students became silent and were all staring at him.

He looked at his body thinking maybe that he smells or he has some dirt.

When he found nothing wrong with him, he look at some students trying to know what the situation was.

Another boy look at him and signaled with his eyes that there's someone behind him.

Slowly, he turned around and was frightened to see me.

"A-amber.." He said looking really frightened.

"I'll count 1-10 and if you don't move I'll surely beat the crap out of you." I told him. "1!"

Without even saying two, he quickly made space for me in the spacious hallway.

I continued walking like nothing happened.

"That nerd is lucky, Amber didn't do anythin bad to him." I heard some student say.

"He should watch his back from now on. Amber might get back at him." Another one said.

 

I'm Amber Liu. Students are afraid of me because I'm the school bully. No one in school dares to talk or get close to me, I like it this way.

 

 

Let me tell you a little something about myself. I'm an illegitimate child of a business tycoon. I didn't knew him until my mother died because of her sickness. I was only nine years old back then.

At a young age I felt the need to work. Back then no one would hire me because of my age but apparently some baker hired me since he pitied me. The salary money of course was not enough but I I somehow managed to buy a few of my mother's medicine since the baker was kind enough to give breads for my mother and I after every work day.

It hurts so much having to watch your mother suffer everday from her illness and you can't do anything. I don't even have friends to talk to since I'd rather earn money than study.

Of course due to our situation my mother eventually died.

Apparently my mother prepared for her death. She was able to write a message to my biological father asking for some support since she's already dying.

So the day after my mother's burial some men knocked on my door saying they're sent to fetch me. I didn't know who the men were but I didn't care and just went with them. What am I to lose anyway?

I spent a few years in my father's home with his wife and my step brother.

I eventually started schooling again but no one would talk to me knowing I'm an illegitimate daughter.

As I finished elementary, students would always tease me and pick on me and every night I would cry myself to sleep blaming the world why my mother left me.

I wasn't only being hated on school because everyday my step family would always remind me that I'm no one to them. My step mother especially hates me.

When high shool came my world changed. My stepmom convinced my father to just let me live in an apartment since she said I was already old enough to be by myself and she said that she's reminded everyday that my dad made a mistake on her.

My dad agreed and I like the idea anyway. He sends me allowance every month so I can live on my own.

My school life drastically changed too, because when highschool came I started fighting back. There was an incident that a bully really got in to my nerve and I sent him to the hospital and that's when students became afraid of me.

Since then instead of students teasing and pickin on me. They were now afraid of me.

I like the feeling of being powerful over someone especilly when they cry and beg for you to stop. It makes me feel dominant and high.

When I'm not in school I usually get on to fights. I like the rush I get when somebody punches me and the next thing you know you want to punch the out that person until he begs for mercy.

 

 

 

I went to the cafeteria and bought some lunch. After buying food I sit in an empty table and started eating.

After eating I went to the back of the school to sleep. The back of the school was a forest so no one was aloud to go there but I like breaking rules. And no one hasn't caught me yet even I go here everyday.

 As usual I went to the tree I always go and sat on its roots and sleep.

I woke up feeling reenergized and started walking back to class.

 

I went in the classroom and the teacher who was discussing something stopped and acknowledged me.

"Well it's nice for you Ms. Liu to go to class." I heard her say to me as I go to my seat. Sarcasm in her voice.

"The pleasure is all my mine. Mr. Choi." I said to him.

"Detention for being thirty minutes late and for all the other times you were late. Saturday 8:00 sharp." He said sternly.

"Pfft. Whatever."

 

 

Saturday came and as what Mr. Choi said I came to school 8:00 sharp.

I went to the library since I've attended the previous detentions in the library.

I sit in my usual chair and tried to sleep expecting that I'm be the only one here, as usual.

Not long enough I heard the door open. I didn't bother to look at who it was since I know it will be Mr. Choi for sure.

Minutes passed and he hasn't still have spoken so I raised my head and look at the teacher in front. 

I saw no one in front. I look around and saw someone sitting accross from me.

It was a Krystal Jung. She's the teacher's pet type so I wonder what had she done.

A smirk formed on my lips thinking what could've she done.

 

The door opened again revealing Mr. Choi.

"Now that the two of you are here you can now think of the things you've done wrong and examine yourselves. Your time here will be from 8:00 to 4:00 doing only reflecting about your mistakes. So I expect you all to be a changed student after this. No going out." With that he went out of the library.

"So, what does a teacher's pet doing in detention?" I ask her. She was just sitting with her arms crossed and spacing out.

"Shut up, Liu." She said and it only intrigued me more.

"Ooh. Fiesty. I like fiesty." I said to her annoying her.

"If you don't want to say it then I would just keep on thinking that the teacher's pet is naughty after all." I said smirking.

"Don't you have anything better to do?" She said looking really annoyed.

"For the next eight hours? No. I don't have anything better to do." I said to her and it only annoyed her more.

She only gave me an 'are you kidding look?'

"So what did you do, ice princess?" I ask her.

"My locker was caught having liquor bottle inside. Are you happy now?" 

"Very. I didn't know you would have the guts to do that." I .

"Will you just shut up?!" She said.

"Is little princess looking for some danger?" I asked her smirking. She didn't answer so I just kept on teasing her.

"Little princess is naughty afer all." I said, now smiling.

"I bet little princess is sick and tired of being ms. goody two shoes, huh?"

"So what?! What if I am huh?! What are you gonna do about it?!" She suddenly burst out.

"Well, today is your lucky day princess 'cause the big bad wolf is  here." I said pointing at myself.

"What are you talking bout?" She asks me.

"I'll give you some danger." I said to her.

"How? We're stuck in here." She asks looking interested.

"We'll sneak out of course." I told her.

"But that's dangerous!" She said.

"Isn't that what you're looking for?" She oaused and nodded at me. "Then let's go."

"How are we gonna get out? Mr. Choi might see us.

"Just follow me."

 

I climbed a shelf and reach a ceiling tile, I easily removed it and climbed it.

"Come on." I said to Krystal.

"Is that even safe?"

"Totally, I do this every week."

"I should've known."

I reach out my hand to help her climb. She look straight to me like she's saying through her eyes 'you'll die if you let me fall'. Then my heart started to beat irregularly. Weird.

Seconds later, we're now heading the ceiling near the back of the school.

When I'm sure we're near the exit at the back of the school I took out one of the ceiling tile and jump.

"That's high,Liu. I don't think I can jump that."

"I'll catch you, come on." I said to her while spreading my arms for her.

"I don't think so.." She said hesitating.

"Come on, Jung. I thought you wanted this."

"I can't believe I'm doing this."She closed her eyes and jumped.

Luckily, I caught her.

"That wasn't so bad now was it?" I said to her making her blush.

 

 

I lead Krystal to the forest.

"What are we doing here? We're not allowed to be here." She said sounding worried.

"I know this, just trust me okay?"

We went thru the forest that leads to the park and we're now in the city.

"How did you know about this?" She asks, totally amazed. "I'm always here."

"That explains why your always missing during class hours."

"Genius right?"

 

We went to the weekend market, apparently the princess I am with hasn't been here before.

"Wow! I've always dreamt of going here!" She said to me.

"Wh? Can't you go here?"

"My parents always said that it's dangerous here. And they say never try street food in here, it's dirty."

"Well, thanks to me I brought you here."

 

I pulled a box of cigaretted from my pocket and offered her.

"Want some?" I ask her adn her eyes widen.

"Aren't a little too young to use that?" She asks.

"So?" I counterback as I put one in my mouth and search my pocket for a lighter.

"So, you can't do cigarrettes." She said a matter of factly.

"I can do whatever I want." I said lighting it. "Do you wanna try it?" I ask her.

I can see hesitation in her eyes.

"I don't know.."

"Come on, just one swig." I told her.

"You know, you're really a bad influence." She said. "Okay, I'll try it." I laughed at her.

"Here." I handed her a my cigarette. "Just inhale it."

She took it and places it between her lips and inhale the smoke. She swallowed the smoke and it made her cough.

"I don't like it." She said as she give me back my smoke, her face looked like she just ate something bad,

"There's always a first time."  I said.

 

We went around the weekend market and I can see that Krystal really enjoyed.

We played some games in some booths and bought a lot of street foods.

 

"Princess, sorry to break it to you but It's already 3.30. We have to go back to the school."

". You should've told me earlier."

"I was but you were so  immersed with the whole weekend market."

We ran back to the school like we're running for our lives.

At exactly 4.00 we arrived at the library. We're still panting hard when Mr. Choi came in.

"You may go now, kids." He said and left.

"That was close." Krystal said.

"Yeah, it was total rush." I said.

We went to the school gate to go home.

"You aren't as bad as what people say you were." She said.

It hit me, I don't know what has gotten in to me.. I've been someone else when I was with Krystal. Someone I don't know. It kinda felt good actually. But this is so new to me.

Suddenly, I remembered people picking on me and my personality turned 180 degrees.

"None of this ever happened. Forget all of these." I said coldly to her and walk away.

 

The whole weekend my thoughts were clouded with Krystal. There's an urge within me that wanted to see her but I know I can't.

I don't build any bond with someone.

I've been alone and always will be.

I don't need anyone to rely on.

I don't need someone.

I like solitude.

I don't need someone, I repeated to myself.

After all, no one likes me. People only know how to hate and judge.

I sit alone in my apartment and I know I'm happy with this.

I only care for myelf. No hurt.

 

 

Monday came and I just did my usual routine.

I head for the forest after I ate to sleep.

"There you are." Krystal came out of nowhere

"What are you doing here?!" I asked. I'm kinda annoyed.

"To see you." She said.

"I told you to forget what had happened!" I half shouted at her.

"I-I can't." She said shyly.

"What do you mean you can't?!"

"I don't know. I just can't forget what happened. It keeps on playing in my head." 

"Fine, don't forget it. But you don't know, I dont know you. Now go." I commanded her.

"You're not the boss of me! I can do whatever I please!" She said arrogantly.

I let out frustrated grunt and just sat under the tree to sleep.

I can't sleep knowing she's near me also seating under the tree.

"Tell me, Jung? What can I do to make you go away?" 

"Nothing."

"There must be a way."

"Nothing. I just want to be near you."

"Why?!" All of her words and action felt warm in my heart and it scares me. I've never felt this before and I don't think I want to feel this ever.

"You're something.. When we went to sneak out of detention I immediately liked your aura. You scream danger. The whole you. The feeling being with you feels so alive. You're like a drug, Amber. People said to stay away from you but now I keep coming back for more. You were right you know, I was looking for danger to feel alive. Maybe because I'm sick of being told what and what not to do. I don't want to be the goody goody little girl anymore. I want danger and I found it in you. I just can't stay away. I think it's too early to say but I think I like you."

"You don't know me. It's better for you to stay away from me. You don't want to be near me or be associated with me." I told her and it made my heart break.

"Then make me." She challenged me.

 

 

 

After school, when I was walking my home I can feel someone following me. I didn't have to look at her to know her. After all, she's the only one who wanted to go near me.

I didn't take my usual route home. I want to make her to stay away for me.

I walk to the dangerous part of town. I want to make her see that I'm not good. That I'm not good for her.

I turned to an alley knowing a gang I once fought with are here.

The gang saw me and I know they want to get back at me.

"Well, if it isn't Amber Liu." A man said.

"I didnt know you would even dare to come here again." Another one said.

"Look I was just trying to pass here." I said lying. I really planned this so Krystal would see that I do no good.

I can see the others stretching their knuckles preparing to fight. I took a glimpse at my back and didn't see, Krystal but I know she's hiding.

And with a blink they started throwing kicks and pinches at me. I managed to dodge some but I still received a lot. My lips are busted and I can feel blood coming out fro my nose. My head feels heavy as they continue to fight me. Somehow I still managed to keep my body upright and fight back.

After a few more punches we heard sirens, sounds like police sirens.

The gang immediately ran away and I'm left with bruises and wounds all over my body. This surely will hurt later.

After seeing their figures disappear I lie on the ground to rest my sore body.

I close my eyes for a second and when I open them I see Krystal staring right down at me.

"What?" I said to her.

She didn't answer but she kneeled beside me examining my wounds.

"Do they hurt?" She asks as she look straight in to my eyes. I got hypnotized by her eyes, her beautiful sparkling her eyes. I shake  my head slowly telling it doesn't hurt.

"You know you didn't need to get yourself in trouble to show me who you are." She said. "And for the record, I still want to be near you."

Her words were really touching and it formed tears in my eyes but I held it in.

"Let's get you cleaned up." She said and she help me get up from the ground.

We head to my house as I walk limping. She noticed it and she grab my arm and put it around hr shoulders.

At first I want to take my arm off her but when our bodies came in contact I decided to just be this close to her when her scent filled my senses.

She smell of strawberries, sweet red strawberries. All the way to my house I was just staring at her thinking I did something right to meet her. Then there it goes again, the pounding of my heart.

 

When we reach my house we settled ourselves on my couch.

"Where's your medicine kit." She asked me and I point to the drawer on the left. She got it and started to clean my wounds.

She leaned closer to me as she applies alcohol on my wounds. I flinch when the cotton made in contact with my wounds.

"Don't move." She said softly nd I tried to stay still.

Staring at her and losing my thought on her made me bare with the pain as she clean my wounds.

"There all done." She said and it brought me back to reality.

 

She gathered all her things to prepare to leave but seeing that it's already late I tried to stop her. I kind of feel responsible for her.

"W-wait." I stop her from walking and she turn around to face me.

"D-do you want to stay the night? I m-mean it's a-already late. I-it might not be safe for you to go home at this hour.." Why am I stuttering, I never stutter!

She smiled and nodded. I think she felt the sincerity of my words.

"You just take the bed, I'll just sleep here." I told her.

"No. I'm only a guest here. You take the bed, I'll take the couch. Plus, your wounded."

"N-no. Let's just say it's my way of showing my gratitude." I said.

"Why don't we  just share the bed instead?" She asks, I think her cheeks turned pink bit I'm not sure, she quickly covered her face with her hair. "I m-mean your bed can fit two so why not, right?" She said and I just nodded.

 

We ate dinner and geet ready for bed. I lend her some of my small clothes so she could change.

We're both lying down on my bed and I can't sleep knowing she's beside me on my bed.

"Good night, Amber." She said.

"Good night, Krystal."

After a few minutes I feel her body shift to my direction. My body became stiff knowing she's staring at me.

"Why are you staring at me?" I ask her.

"Nothing." She said

"It's r-really uncomfortable. You shouldn't do that." I said coldly.

"The Amber Liu, being uncomfortable around me? Well, that's big news." she said teasing me.

"I-I'm not!" I told her.

"You just said it yourself." 

"Well, I was just fooling you!" I told her and faced her to show her I'm not uncomfortable. I regretted it because now, we're just inches apart and my heart started to pound uncontrollably.

Slowly she closed the gap between our bodies and rest her head on my chest while her hand s arounf my waist. I was frozen not knowing what to do.

"Relax." She said and my hand found its way to her back, haugging her.

"That wasn't so hard was it?" She said and I can feel her smiling.

The feeling I'm feeling right now is so overwhelming. Everything is so new. I never knew I could feel somebody's warmth again. Ever since my mother died I just protected myself. Now, it feels nice someone protecting you. Krystal is protecting me from myself.

And for the first time, I feel loved.

 

 

The next day I woke up with an empty space beside me. I walked to the kitchen and found a note on my ref that she left early to prepare for school. She even cooked some breakfast for me.

I just can't help but smile.

 

 

Weeks passed with Krystal trying to follow me around the school. At first I just let her be but I didn't acknowledge her presence. But as time goes by I found myself talking to her  and missing her when she's not around. We then started to eat lunch together and went to the back of the school to sleep or sometimes just talk. We would go to classes together and it really made me happy.

Alot of people are surprised seeing me with Krystal. I can't blame them though.

Unfortunately, I starteed to hear some students talk bad about her. I can take it if it was me they're talking about but if I can't take it if they talk bad about Krystal.

 

On a lunch time, we're sitting under the tree at the back of the school. I inhaled deeply, I have to tell her to get away from me.

"You should stop being around me." I told her.

"Why? You became okay with it. Why all of a sudden?" She asks, surprised.

"I just don't think it's alright for you to be around me. Student are talking bad about you." I told her.

"I don't care about what they say." She said getting angry.

"Just don't be around me anymore." I said and get up to leave.

"And what if I don't want?" She asks and it made me stop.

"Then I will make sure you stay away from me." I said and walked away as tears fall from my eyes.

 

 

The following days, Krystal still follows me around. I would just ignore nad act as if  she's just an air around me. I would purposely bump to her when I see her and I know my actions towards her are making her sad.

Everyday I just force myself to go to school because it means that I would have to make Krystal stay away from me.

So I've decided to not attend school for a week. The whole time I was just at home smoking my lungs out. It made me feel less tense and it made me somehow forget Krystal.

Saturday came and I decided to go out. I just walked and walked with no particular direction. I stopped when I realized my feet brought me to the weekend market. I stayed there the whole day remembering about Krystal and I's time here together.

When night came, I sat myself I went to the park near the weekend market and found a bench in the secluded part of the park. I sat on it away from people and smoke.

I watch the smoke comes out of my mouth until it disappear in to nothingness.

Why can't I just be a smoke so I can just disappear and be nothing.

 I got another stick and just place it in my mouth and closed my eyes as I lean my head back.

 

I felt a weight on me. I opened my eyes and see Krystal sitting on my lap. She has an unlighted cigarrete in . Her hands went at the back of my head pulling me closer to her. She let her cigarette's touch my lighted cigarette to ignite her's.

My hands automatically went to her waist securing her position.

She placed the cigarette in between her forefinger and middle finger to take it out of . She then leaned in more, connecting her forehead with mine.

"Why do you keep on running away from me?" She asks, I can see tears flowing from her eyes.

"To keep you safe." I told her.

"But I don't want to be safe if it means I don't get to be with you." She said.

"You're just saying it now, Krystal. But after you hear waht other people has to say-"

"How many times do I have to tell you that I don't care about other people?" She said. "Can't you see, Amber? I love you! I love you because of who you are. I'm not asking you to be someone else. I'm just asking you to be always near me and love me back and we'll figure out the rest."

She didn't let me talk as she kissed my lips. Our cigarettes disregarded when her hands messed with my hair and my hands explored her back.

"Is this what it feels to be loved?" I ask her when we separeted for air.

"I guess so." She said.

"I love you, Krystal." I told her and she smiled.

"After knowing that you love me back, you can't ever leave my side. You're stuck with me." She said as she connected our lips once again.

"There's no place I'd rather be." I told her.

"We'll figure out the rest okay? Just love me and everything will be alright." She said to me.

 

Krystal and I got together and for the first time I let myself open up to anyone. Whenever I hear people talking about Krystal she would just hold my hand to calm me down and tell me words of love.

I don't know what I did for me to deserve her but all I know is that I would do anything to keep her near to me.