.:15:. Move : Voice
Have You Ever
♫ Yoon Hari ♫
"It's all good," I smile with satisfaction, looking at the letters in front of me. Previously, there are only three different colors of envelopes now I have four different colors.
Red for me, green for Gikwang, violet for Sunhyun, and blue for Yoseob.
I write a little note and leave it on the table, telling whoever that will read the note to take their own letters. I grab the red and blue envelopes and leave the room.
It's been three weeks since we announced about the new group, Renaitre, which consists of four members instead of only three members.
This is the term I asked Gikwang if he wanted to form the group again. I would join if Yoseob was included in our group.
Knowing that he has a beautiful voice we never knew before and he is the one who knows my secret, my feeling towards Gikwang, I think he will be the only pillar to make me stand still.
At first, Yoseob refused my request, telling me that he was not qualified enough to be a a member of music group. But after a few tries of assuring attempts, he finally accepted it.
He even landed a kiss on my forehead, saying that he did this to show me his support. With blushing cheeks, I thanked him and told him that I would do my best for everything.
But it's easier said than done, isn't it?
Now I'm at the basement, Yoseob's secret spot. I am staring at the guitar Yoseob put in the corner of the room, the one he used the day I realized that he's really talented.
Somehow I blame myself who never recognized Yoseob more because my mind was too attached to Gikwang. I met Gikwang and Yoseob around same time but I never put my focus on him. Not even once.
One thing for sure that I know now. It's really hard to forget the one you love when you stay close to him.
Accepting to stay as a group with them means I will meet Gikwang often. And I can't avoid him for random reasons; that's why I hide myself in this place. The place where he and Sunhyun don't know.
"Hari," Yoseob steps closer to me. He flashes a smile to me and takes a seat next to me. "How long have you been here?"
"Ten minutes?" I answer with uncertainty. I hand him the blue envelopes, "You have more fans than I thought."
"Is that a compliment?" he raises his eyebrow as he takes the envelopes from me. "It sounds like I shouldn't have many fans."
"Maybe," I shrug playfully, making him to shake his head with a smile. He opens the first envelope and reads the letter in silence.
After our first performance together last week, right after the last day of exam week, Renaitre gained really wide popularity. Some of my classmates asked me about Yoseob and he has many fans due to his beautiful voice.
I admit that Gikwang has a really beutiful voice but Yoseob is indeed a talented vocalist that we never recognized. His down to earth personality made us couldn't see his charisma when he's singing.
I realize he frowns when he reads the third letter. He quickly folds the letter and puts it back inside the envelope.
"Is something wrong?" I tilt my head.
"Nothing," he pats my head with assuring smile. "Have you read your letters?"
I shake my head slowly, "Not yet. I'll read them at home. I want to write new song. With the sentence you wrote on my paper that day. Do you remember?"
He stares at me with surprise but then he nods, "Yes, I remember. Are you going to write new title then?"
"Yes, and I will need your help for the music," I make a peace sign with my fingers. "We will sing this song on the musician camp next week!"
Yes, Renaitre received an invitation from Jo Kwon for musician camp, an event where young musicians gather for five days and four nights at mountain area to enhance ourselves.
Four of us will attend the musician camp, knowing that it will be a chance for us to be better in music.
"You know," I touch my lips with finger, "I think it will be good to do a small performance this afternoon."
"Eh?" he blinks with wide eyes. "What do you mean?"
"Come on," I stand up and smile at him. "Let's go to the university yard. I want to hear your voice."
"You can hear me here," he tries to find an alibi, sitting still.
"Aigoo, come on. Gikwang used to-"
I quickly cover my mouth with my right hand. Why did I mention his name with so much excitement again? I must stop bringing up his name in the middle of my conversation.
Yoseob looks at me and then sighs. He stands up and pats my head, walking to grab his guitar, "Let's go then."
A smile blossoms on my lips since he agrees to my request. Again.
Yoseob has been really nice and sweet towards me. I'm glad that he joined the group. I want to know him better than I used to do.
And... this is the only secret I can't share to someone else. Not even Yoseob.
Maybe, just maybe, I will fall for Yoseob. After all I need to move on from my feeling towards Gikwang, right?
A smile blossoms on my lips since he agrees to my request. Again.
Yoseob has been really nice and sweet towards me. I'm glad that he joined the group. I want to know him better than I used to do.
And... this is the only secret I can't share to someone else. Not even Yoseob.
Maybe, just maybe, I will fall for Yoseob. After all I need to move on from my feeling towards Gikwang, right?
♫ Yang Yoseob ♫
I sit down on the bench with my guitar, singing a song with Hari. It makes me happy to see her sweet smile after these times.
The night she met me to ask me to join a new music group, she waited for me for around two hours. I refused her offer, not wanting to be placed between her and Gikwang.
But I couldn't lie that I wanted to be closer with Hari. Gikwang had a bigger chance than me since he could stay with Hari often and I needed that chance if I wanted Hari to realize my heart.
After I accepted her offer, I didn't regret my decision because I could see her bright smile, her happy smile because I wanted to become her groupmate.
After two weeks of exam week, I performed in front of public for the first time with Hari, Gikwang, and Sunhyun.
I was really nervous but Gikwang gave me a brotherly hug, telling me that I would do fine. Sunhyun patted my back twice, giving me a cheerful smile.
And I suddeny had power from nowhere. I sang three songs with Hari, making the crowd to give us big applause. After the performance, as if nothing happened, we hugged each other.
Somehow I hope this situation will last forever.
Even though I still feel the heartache whenever I see Hari glances at Gikwang secretly, I still maintain a good relationship with each of them.
The difference between them is Gikwang and Hari are not as close as before. If I used to see Gikwang , he doesn't even dare to touch Hari now.
And when I asked Gikwang about what happened between him and Hari, he only gave me a weak smile, telling me that both of us must make Hari happy.
"Yoseob, is this your song?" Hari hands me a paper. The crowds are gathering around us, waiting for the next song by us.
I know that Musique used to perform anytime they wanted to, sitting around university area, gaining the attention from the students to watch their performance. They usually spreaded the news of sudden performance via Twitter, whenever they felt want to perform somewhere.
This was one trait why they gained popularity easily because they didn't care where they performed; they showed their best states whenever they performed and people loved them for that.
"Ah!" I grab the paper quickly from her. It's a song I wrote after I met her crying alone at the park. I went back to my apartment and wrote the song at night.
"Yah!" she protests when Gikwang and Sunhyun walk through the crowd and approach us. Gikwang takes the paper from me and looks at it.
"Who Made You Cry," Gikwang reads the title and smirks. "A ballad?"
"Give it back," I sigh and try to grab the paper from him but he hands it to Sunhyun quickly.
"Sing it," Sunhyun smiles as she returns the paper to me. "I'm sure it is a beautiful song. We want to hear it. Right, Hari?"
I take a glance at Hari and she nods with excitement. Her eyes are not at Gikwang; she is looking at me with a cute smile.
"Fine," I let a smile forms on my lips. I can't refuse her request. Never. I look at the crowd and bow slightly at them, making some girls to squeal. "It's a simple song."
I take a deep breathe and concentrate on my guitar. I try to remember the emotion I felt when I wrote this song. The words I couldn't say to Hari.
I sing the song along with the melodies from my guitar. I notice that Hari is looking at me, making my heart to skip a beat but I try to give my best performance.
"The memory of the rainy day fills my mind again
I really want to ask your heart
Who are you thinking about right now?
Who are you waiting for all night?
I am right here next to you
In this perfect world, changing in time
You still don't see me"
I sing the verse perfectly and finally I reach the refrain part. These are the words I hold on inside my heart, Hari.
"Tell me baby who made you cry
Tell me baby who broke your heart
I am willing to wait for you
Please look at me
Tell me baby who made you cry
Tell me baby who made you sad
I will always be there for you
Come to me
Let me ease your pain
Let me wipe your tears"
After the refrain, I stop and bow to the crowd, "It's an unfinished song. I'm sorry for the short ballad."
For my surprise, the crowd applause, cheering for me. I turn to see Gikwang as he gives me his thumbs up while Sunhyun claps her hand together, giving me a happy smile.
When I turn to Hari, I don't care if I'm exaggerating things now, but I swear she looks extremely beautiful with the smile on her lips.
Gikwang tells the crowd that that was the last song and we are going back to our activities now. Some of the students come to us, talking for a moment. Some of them even leave food, drink, or other things on the bench as their supports for us, thanking us for the performance.
After there are only four of us, Hari mutters with a smile to me, "It's beautiful, Yoseob. You sounded like you're singing the song for someone."
Yes, it's for you, Hari.
"Really?" I clear my throat awkwardly. I try to grab a bottle of drink which is given by the fans from the crowd to hide my blushed cheeks. "Ah, I'm thirsty. Anyone?"
I hand each of them a bottle of drink randomly and finally I give Hari a bottle of tea. There is my name on the bottle but I ignore it.
When we drink in silence, suddenly Hari coughs really hard, making us to turn in surprise. She loosens her grip on her bottle, making the liquid to spill on the grass.
Hari covers with her hand, trying to stop the cough but she doesn't stop.
"Hari!" Sunhyun holds her shoulders firmly. "Are you alright? Hari!"
After around ten seconds, Hari stops coughing. Her breathe is unstable and she is sweating. She looks up at us and opens to say something.
But there is no voice coming from .
"Hari," Gikwang squats down to hold her shoulder with serious expression, "say something."
She opens again but after that she shakes her head with frustrated expression. She clenches her fists as she bites her bottom lip.
"You can't...," Sunhyun gasps with shock on her face, "...talk?"
__________
Author's Note:
The lyrics are inspired from "Who Made You Cry", a song by Vanness Wu
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