P/s: After 2 years of not writing this story. Pls excuse any error because I dont do recheck. I;m too lazy to do so. xD

The procedure of life is simple. Either you have to wail or bawling on the floor, hoping for the miseries to end or keep moving forward without minding those sickening thoughts. It is you who have to decide what’s best for you. Either way, you have to face the hard times with the wobbling legs or if you can’t, people tend to commit a suicide. But giving up is not the good choice. It is likely the worst you’ve ever got in hands.

Sehun thought that his path to the main destination was blocked with too many things he could not breathe. The obstacles were making him wonder either he had to continue with living like a total jerk or changed into someone else who would lay low and be patient with all the tests God’s giving him.

Like today, he hardly breathed to see Kris standing on his door, flabbergasted by the scene Kai was sleeping next to him. He had dragged the older out of his room, away from Slytherin dungeon, just to explain everything. But he found none of the truth had been spilled from minutes ago. He just stood next to the older, facing the meadow ahead of him with guilt slowly developing. Easier said than done, that was the only thing that popped in his head when Kris’ eyes landed on him. He knew by the way the other stare at him, though without any expression shown; Kris was mad, deeply mad at him.

He watched as the leaves of the weeping willow danced in synchronicity, followed by the wind that lowly grumbled, blowing the green nature to move in leisure, creating good scenery as if to soothe anybody who’s watching. The place was spacious, enough for the whole Hogwart’s students to fit in but with the crowd in it, it could only kill the beauty of the space and Sehun hated it. He liked it this way. Without anyone paying him attention, well except for Kris who was waiting for his answer, and without those who could not keep their eyes off of him as if they were the predators ready to kill their victims.

“So, Sehun?” Kris voiced, breaking the silence and Sehun’s thoughts dispersed into the air a second after.

Sehun huffed and sighed as he glanced at Kris who was now having his brows furrowed. It seemed like he didn’t have any other choices but to explain. “Look, I didn’t mean to keep this away from you but,”

“But you keep it away from me anyway. It’s not like you want to tell me, right? And I am no longer an important person to you, is that what you mean?” Kris’ voice was stern. He did not sound like he was joking at all. The taller looked totally pissed off with the fact that Sehun was hiding something from him. He was not someone who liked to meddle in other’s business but it was Sehun that we were talking about and surely he did not want to miss any update from the latter.

“Kris please, I don’t have a choice,” Sehun tried to explain but he could not find the right words to elaborate what he had been containing under his chest. It was too complicated for him to voice everything out at this moment.

“Of course you have a choice. It’s not like you could keep it away from me forever. No matter how or no matter what, we are best friends if that’s what you think and I need to know. I’ve been here for you since forever Sehun, and I don’t want to be someone who’s left out of everything!” Kris raised his voice without any intention to hurt Sehun’s feeling but he was disappointed as he was always waiting for Sehun to look at his way and to find Sehun with Kai in the morning was totally breaking his heart into million pieces.

“Then don’t! Thank you for always being here for me, if you could not forgive me for my mistakes then don’t come to see me again. I’ve wanted to tell you but I don’t know how and of course I don’t want to hide it from you forever. I have my reason and you don’t understand!” Now it was Sehun’s turn to raise his voice, shouting in front of Kris but he regretted it a second after as Kris suddenly withdrew his step, eyes widened in surprise, slowly stepping back as he recalled Sehun’s words. Tears were already pooling in his eyes and Sehun’s words came out like a knife stabbing his heart.

All the sparks that were usually seen in Kris’ eyes gone within second; with the sadness as the substitute and Sehun felt like killing himself for being bold and stupid. The brown orbs that were usually bright dimmed with the presence of glum. The blonde was feeling terribly bad with it and he wished he could burry himself in the graveyard; never once in his life he wanted to hurt Kris’ feelings; the one who had taught him how to appreciate his life better. And now he was going to lose a good friend and he knew it.

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