Hoya was almost reach the corner of the room while carrying the box on his hands, but before he arrived he hears footsteps along with the nagging voice of Myungsoo.

“Hyung, what do you think you’re doing? You shouldn’t do that…this box is heavy and I can’t let you carry it. Geez, doctor has told you not to overwork yourself yet, right?” Myungsoo frowned at him while seizing the box that he held. Hoya looks disappointed. He just sighed while watching Myungsoo moving the box to the corner of the room on his own.

“Come on…it’s not that heavy. I’m dead bored, Soo. I could use some exercise.”

“Bora-noona will kill me if she knows that I let you move a lot. The deal is that you accompanying me packing…not to help me. Clear?” He said while forcing Hoya to sit back on the couch. Hoya just pouted while sitting on the couch. Somehow it’s annoyed him how people around him treat him like he was made of glass since the accident. Myungsoo notices that look and just smile.

“Hey, ahjussi…don’t pout like that. It doesn’t suits you. You’ll get wrinkles soon.” He teased.

“Shut up you kid! Argh…I’m bored you know…I need something to do. Bora is busy at work, mom and dad back to Daegu and I only have you…but you’re moving to another country…I’m a lonely man. I’m married and I’m still so lonely. This is fascinating.” He said dramatically. Myungsoo laughs hard. He knows Hoya just joking. It’s nice to see that sassy remarks of him again.

“Make a baby then. You and Bora-noona.”

“Ha. Great idea. Bora already said that if we have a baby she will bring him to Glastonbury on the first birthday and including trip to The Beatles hometown, Liverpool. She wants to raise a baby rocker.” He said sarcastically. Somehow he doesn’t get the way his wife thinking. Sure he loves her…more than anything, but sometimes he can’t deny that she’s extremely odd. Myungsoo laughs harder, actually that couple amaze him…how odd they are. But those two people are significant person in his life. He loves them, and he loves how that couple loves each other.

“Ahh…I’m gonna miss you a lot, you know…” Hoya said with wondering eyes.

“Me too. But come on…Japan is not that far. Actually it doesn’t matter how far it is, right? I can always come home. To the family. Am I right?” The younger man smiles while joining Hoya sits on the couch.

“Sure. Sure you always can. Geez…how can you become much wiser in a few days?” He smiles while ruffling  Myungsoo’s hair playfully.

“Come on…I’m serious, hyung.”

“Oh, me too. You know… I’m so proud of you, Soo. I really do.” He said. Myungsoo smiles widen. He rest his back on the couch, and taking a deep breath while his head slowly leaning on Hoya’s shoulder like a kid earning for comfort.

“Thank you hyung…for everything. When it comes to you…I don’t know how much ‘thank yous’ that I should’ve said. It would never be enough.” He said. Hoya just chuckles. They just remain silent without saying anything. Those two brothers have through a lot. A lot of stuff until they don’t need words to describe it. From innocence, comfort, affection, despair, regrets, jealousy, pain, acceptance, desperation, honesty, warmness….and of course happiness. They’re ready for it now.

“Anyway…what about Soyu?” Hoya is the one that broke the silence. Suddenly the smile on the younger’s face fading. Myungsoo sighed.

“I don’t know what I should do.”

“How’s her reaction when you told her you’re leaving for music school in Japan?”

“She smiles. But I know it was a bitter one. Just it. She smiled and didn’t say anything. I was hoping for reaction but nothing…no words come from her. I don’t know what to do.”

“Really?”

“The first thing she said that time is… ‘It’s cold…let’s go home.’ Just like she didn’t react to the news. She’s mad hyung…I ruined it.”

“Go meet her then…tell her how you feel. You gotta make things right before leaves, Soo.”

“I know, but she’s been avoiding me for days…saying she’s busy with college application and refuse to meet. She doesn’t even pick my call.”

“Soo…”

“She’s mad, I knew it. I wouldn’t blame her though. It’s clearly my fault.How could I plan to leave without telling her? Of course it drives her crazy. Even she just texted me saying that she can’t send me off in the airport tomorrow. She said she’s busy.” Myungsoo said.

“What? Well…that’s serious. Are you guys breaking up?”

“No way. I don’t want to. I just…don’t know what to do.” At that moment Hoya saw frustrating look in the younger face.

“Myungsoo, let me ask you one thing…and please answer it truthfully…”

“What is it?”

“Do you love her?” Hoya asked seriously.

“I do…”

“Really?” He asked again.

“What do you mean? Of course…I…”

“Then why it seems like, Soyu doesn’t know that?”

Myungsoo can't answer that. He just frozen right on that spot.

--

Myungsoo’s hand gripping on his luggage holder. Carefully he look at the figures in front of him. People that he loves the most in the world. His family. His aunt and uncle, Hoya and Bora. They’re all smiling..even though clearly his aunt look sad a little bit to send ‘her little Myungsoo’ away.

“Let’s take a photograph. The nice one.”  His uncle said, while taking out Myungsoo’s old camera from his bag. They all smiling…especially Myungsoo. The camera that he used to take a lot of monochrome pictures…he decides to leave it at home. Not because he want to forget it…but because…he want to keep it safe. All the memories…bad or good…it all precious and he’s going leave it that way.

“One…two…three…” Click! The sound of the shutter echoes as the airport officer that they asked for help taking the picture. It was nicely taken. Even though, Myungsoo still see it as monochrome…but in his heart…it always more than that. It always a story that more than words.

He headed towards the boarding gate after hug them one by one…saying farewell and such a things. He sighed as he walks towards the gate. Hands reaching for phone on his pocket…

So she is really not coming…

That’s when he stops walking…press 1 on his speed dial. Only to hear the voice mail…but that voice is the thing that’s he wants to hear right now.

“Hi…this is Kang Soyu. I’m busy saving the world right now, so I can’t pick up your random call. So just leave a message.”

“Geez…seriously, just change your voice mail, kiddo. It’s weird.” He laughs.

“But you know…now I’m wondering, maybe you are really busy saving the world…so busy. Until you can even send your boyfriend off from airport. I feel a little bit hurt, you know…I mean everyone’s there, everyone that I love is there…except you…But I guess I can’t blame you. You’re mad at me, right? I let you down…for not telling you. It was one of the biggest decisions in my life…leaving photography school and starting music college abroad…and I don’t even tell you. Sure, you have the right to be mad." He clears his throat before starts talking again.

"But Soyou-ah…don’t you realize that I’m able to do that because of you? If I didn’t met you that day on the hospital, if we didn’t become friends, and finally lovers…maybe I won’t have courage to take this step. You once told me that, for someone who has lost everything, finding another dream is important. Sure it’s hard like hell. But it’s worth trying, and I’m lucky, because I did it. But do you know what’s harder that that? It’s finding love…the one that you love with all your heart. What’s the right word? Umm…soul mate? Yeah...it’s hard to find. I don’t know anything about that…and I don’t care, but when I met you…it feels odd, but right. Even it feels right when we did ‘wrong things’ like smoking or drinking.” He laughs...remembering of the time they spent in the hospita's balcony.

“Everything about you is always feels right to me…just like everything you said. So it’s hard for me too, Soyu-ah…leaving. It’s hard. I mean look at you. You’re young, smart, bright…and cute. And I’m 6 years older than you. I shouldn’t be selfish, right? You can find a lot of good guy that much younger, more handsome and wasn’t suicidal. You can find better.” Myungsoo feels his voice trembled, so he takes a deep breath to calm himself down.

“But I don’t want you to. If there’s one thing that I want right now, I want to be selfish. I want you to wait for me. I want you to only look at me. Only me…because…I love you. I love you, Soyu. I’m sorry that I didn’t show it properly. But you should know that now…I love you."

"I’m freaking love you.”

“Damn, it’s frustrating because…I really missed you right now. I know it’s crazy…but I really wish you’re here with me now. Sending me off, waving at me…or at least kissing me goodbye. But you're not here. And...oh, crap…this voice mail is too long. And they said I should board soon. My welcoming ceremony at college will be held in 3 hours. So I’ll hang up. Don’t be mad at me for long please…and…call me if you get this.”

Myungsoo ended the call. He sighed while wiping a few drops of tears on the corner of his eyes. He turned off his phone, standing up…take another deep breathe and walk towards the gate.

--

Myungsoo looks up at the sky above him. The overriding sense of Tokyo...is that it is a city devoted to the something new, sped up in a subtle but profound way. Busy and homie. Like a postmodern science-fiction story. The busy road, street light, people walking and street performance. Myungsoo smiles seeing all those thing through the window of the cab that he’s riding on. Myungsoo take a look at his phone the moment the cab arrived at the school building. Still no calls, no message. He sighed. But he’s determined…as he walks entering the building with his guitar case on his back. A helper from college show him to his room at the dorm when he meet a skinny but cheerful guy who also happen to be his roommate. He looks a little bit younger than him..maybe one or two years.

“Hi…you must be Kim…”

“Kim Myungsoo…nice to meet you.” Myungsoo shakes his hand and smiling.

“I’m Jinyoung. Jung Jinyoung.” That guy greets him with smile. 

“What? You’re Korean?”

“Half…my dad is coming from Gwangju. You just come, right? But I think you should unpack later, we have to gathered in the hall for welcoming ceremony now.”

“Oh…okay.”

Both of get along as they walk towards the hall. Myungsoo meet a good friend, a good roommate. Jinyoung seems like a nice guy. He thinks it is a good start to live in a new city. They’re entering the hall where all the students gathered and seated.

“How long the ceremony will take?” Myungsoo asked as they both sitting in the middle row seat.

“I don’t know. Maybe an hour. But I heard there will be an opening performance…”Jinyoung said.

“Performance? From who?”

“The freshman with highest entrance grade score. I hear the demo application from that person blow the headmaster away.”

“Really?” Myungsoo asked curiously.

“Oh…she’s there…I think it’s her.” Jinyoung points at the figure far on the stage near the front row.

Myungsoo eyes look at the direction. At that moment he’s stunned and freeze. His eyes and mouth wide open seeing the figure who appears at the stage. Myungsoo thinks it is a dream.

“You gotta be kidding me!” He said, making Jinyoung wonders what's wrong with him.

“Ohayou gozaimasu. My name is Kang Soyu. Yoroshiku onegaishimasu. I’m so glad to be offered the opportunity to perform in this ceremony. I’m gonna sing the song that I wrote myself. The song that I performed in the application demo. It's silly actually, I don't mean to show off...but I really don't understand how the counselor give me high score in that song. This is the song about a person that have a lot in common with me. He’s the most inspiring figure I ever met. Like a paradox. Contradiction of many things. He’s imperfect and beautiful. He’s the one that I adore…and I love.” She smiles...and the sweet melody begins.

Entwined moment,

I was chasing pavement

We lived in infinite wonder

Are we alone or just broken?

We don’t care is it pain or just a shame

Because you’re both my umbrella and my rain

Too young to realize

That I’ll always get lost in you eyes

You’re the colorful story

Erasing all the misery

Is it love or just a puzzle of life?

All I know. is that I always lost in your eyes.

Myungsoo chuckles. He can’t describe what he’s feeling right now. Dumbfounded, happy, touched, stunned…but mostly happy. She wrote a song for him. Yeah, a freaking cheesy love song. And she’s there…singing that song in front a lot of people.

--

The ceremony’s over after an hour. Myungsoo finds himself in the sea of people. The students heading back to the dorm, but Myungsoo is heading to the front row. He has to find her. Even though it’s too crowded and people just blocking his way…Myungsoo almost get frustrated when finally he saw a figure walk out from the hall’s door. He’s running towards that figure with all his might. Eager to reach out for her.

And when he’s close enough, Myungsoo quickly grab her and hug her from behind.

“I found you.” He said while panting out of breathe. She giggles.

“Ahh…you found me.”

“You’re such a prankster, kid…” Myungsoo closes his eyes, tighting the hug and ignoring other students that look at them wierdly.

“I got your voicemail.” She said.

“I thought you’re mad at me. You’re cruel. You drive me crazy.”

“I was really busy. Preparing to move here. That’s why I couldn’t send you off at the airport.”

“And you’re not telling me that you're apply here? It’s silly…If I know that you’ll be here…I would…” His words got cut when he find her finger on his lips.

“Ssshh… Is it matter anymore, ahjussi? It doesn’t. We’re here now. You and I.”

“Yeah…we’re here.” Myungsoo smiles while facing her face now. Caressing her cheeks and look closely at her eyes.

“I love you”

“I love you too…”

And he leans to kiss her.

Dear Mom…

A year ago, I wouldn’t sure that I can say such a thing like I’m about to say right now. It’s amazing how a little time can change people…and how change can be so good. Mom, do you remember the story book that you used to bought for me when I was a kid? I always love how that book was so prettily colorful and how the stories in those books always end up happily. You see it yourself, that later in my life I decide to think the world as black and white picture. That I was just a grey and monochrome figure like a dust.

 

But hey…as for now I know that’s not true. People change. And when we believe in people…people come through. And they did…for me. When I let them in, slowly black and white turns into colors. Like the drawing that I did with crayon that you used to bought me. Messy…but subtle and honest. And it’s make you smile. I can’t see it…but I can feel it. That I’m changing too. Now I’m no longer the grey figure. I’m a story. Not the perfect one. But I’m colorful. And happy…

 

And I’m just so glad that I can finally tell you that

 

 

Love you always,

Myungsoo.

END

PS: I''m sorry that this is quite long (or maybe boring), but hey...this is the last. And I'd like to thank you for take your time to read this cheesy story. I don't what do you think about it...I just hope at least it can entertain you. Bye and thank you, guys! :D