Author’s POV:

Jessica’s Pregnancy Calendar – Week 17 ½

Going to sleep that night, Jessica was more than glad that her pillow separated them. She wouldn’t know how to deal with Kris if she saw him so close. She didn’t want to talk to him. She didn’t want anything to do with him. Even though she felt that way, she couldn’t help but secretly feel heartbroken to know that he doesn’t want to try and fix things with her, to avoid the situation. To avoid her. All Kris did was ignore her and slip into bed that night.

At this point, Jessica didn’t want to back down. She wasn’t doing anything wrong. All she was doing was standing her ground and fighting for what was right. At her standing point, she was receiving the short end of the stick and she was being mistreated. It wasn’t fair to her. It really wasn’t. Jessica was pregnant. What did she do to deserve this? She feels trapped and most of all, used.

Jessica woke up when she felt the bed move. Kris was up. She peeked up over her pillow and saw her husband tread his way into the in-suite bathroom. At this time, Jessica would get up and make him breakfast like she did any normal day. It was something she liked to do actually. She never dreaded it.

Regardless to whatever happened last night, Jessica pulled herself up and was about to get out of bed to prepare him the most important meal of the day. That is, until she heard his voice in the closed bathroom.

“Hey, what happened? I got your text.” Kris was on the phone. There was a short pause. “Whoa, okay, Hana, calm down. Hey…hey~ it’s okay, don’t freak out. I’ll be right there.” his calming voice was the one he used to comfort Jessica all the time with. “Yes, don’t panic, I’ll be right there. It’s okay, I was already preparing to go over.”

Jessica was done listening. She felt her heart constrict and felt like it was going to explode. Her hands gripped onto the white duvet and she threw it over herself before she huddled herself underneath, curling up. She wasn’t going to get up. She wasn’t going to make breakfast for Kris. She wasn’t going to do any of that. Not when he wasn’t going to work, but to go see some other woman.

The stinging tears involuntarily started to sneak it’s way out of her eyes and Jessica only let them fall, feeling numb. Her hands caressed her bump – baby blip. She felt her baby kick gently, as if nudging her and telling her not to cry. Sorry, blip… Jessica was apologetic, knowing that her crazy emotions are affecting the baby.

When she heard the bathroom door open, she stilled. Jessica didn’t want to be seen by Kris at all. She doesn’t want to see the person who caused her to feel torn and broken. She silently hoped that Kris doesn’t flip the covers away from her face. Jessica only listened to his approaching footsteps.

Kris’s hand lightly touched the white duvet and moved it a mere inch, exposing more of Jessica’s already shown hair from underneath the blanket. “Guess there’s no breakfast today…” he sighed to himself.

Jessica immediately started to cry hard at his words. Her teeth latched onto her bottom lip, not wanting to make a sound and letting Kris hear. Her hands curled around the fabric of her shirt, gripping it immensely as the tears gushed out non-stop. She swore she felt her heart being deeply stabbed.

“I should call Hana to get food…” Kris mumbled to himself as he walked away from the bed.

The wife shut her eyes, trying her best not to move or make a sound. Her body started to shake involuntarily, all the emotions she was feeling was erupting and all she could do was stay silent and bite her lip. If Kris saw or heard her, he would probably think she was even more pathetic than she already is. Kris already makes her feel like a servant – a dog. Someone he could just use and toss away.

Kris was heard jostling around for a while before he went out of the bedroom and soon, the house. As soon as Jessica heard the front door slam shut, she flipped the duvet off her face and took in a large breath of air. Her breathing was choppy and hitched from her relentless crying. The tears slid down her cheeks like waterfalls. Jessica felt useless and unimportant. She was happily married to Kris, but she feels like she’s trapped all of the sudden. She’s carrying their baby, yet it feels like that was the reason why Kris is giving her this sort of treatment. Jessica doesn’t feel appreciated. Most of all, she feels cheated on. If Kris was already meeting up with Park Hana on a daily basis, there’s no more room for Jessica. The only reason why Jessica is around is because she’s the one Kris married and the one he impregnated.

This didn’t feel like a marriage anymore. It felt like a lie.

Jessica could barely catch her breath, the emotions hitting her hard. The pregnancy hormones only made it even worse. She feels like she couldn’t even function anymore. Baby blip started to kick and move, inadvertently telling her there’s not enough oxygen. Jessica whimpered, the tears feeling endless. Blip…I’m sorry. I’m really sorry you’re in between this…

Jessica only stared at the television in complete dullness. She only rubbed her belly when she felt blip move yet again. Blip was moving a lot today. Too bad Kris never felt our baby move…

The tears rimmed her waterline when she thought about Kris again. It feels so bittersweet. She loves Kris, but at this point, she knows Kris doesn’t love her back. Kris has Park Hana.

Jessica’s heart wrenched. She never liked that feeling. Her hands balled up at the reminder of Kris. She didn’t want to cry again, not after crying the whole morning. The tears just seemed automatic now. Jessica just couldn’t stop the flowing tears from coming out. Her life just seemed too hard.

Before she could start to cry again, the doorbell rang to distract her thoughts. Jessica stood up from the couch and went to answer the door, knowing that she was expecting someone. She didn’t bother looking through the peephole and just swung the door open.

The guest only had their usual smile on. At the sight of the person, Jessica’s lip quivered and she couldn’t help but jump into their arms. Her eyes started to well up again and shed tears.

“I take it that you’re having a bad day.” Donghae didn’t mind the sudden hug and only wrapped his arms around her to comfort her.

Jessica’s sobs only grew louder and harsher. She overwhelming emotions and feelings came again and she was much more glad that she was in someone’s caring and comforting arms this time. She really needed someone but she didn’t want to call a busy Tiffany who had so much going on in her life with her engagement and all. Donghae was the only person she could think of at the moment.

“Hey,” Donghae made her look at him as he gently held her chin. “Try to relax a little. You’re getting out of breath too easily. I don’t want you fainting. That’d be bad for little peanut.” He was concerned, seeing how little air was getting into her lungs.

Jessica only sniffled before nodding her head. “Sorry…” she realized that she had jumped into his arms a little too comfortably and backed up. “You should…come in.” she tried to stop the tears.

Donghae saw her puffy reddened eyes and gave her another well-needed hug. “Just cry it out first and then we can talk about it if you want to.” He held her warmly and openly.

Jessica only let it go and made herself comfortable in Donghae’s arms. The hot tears streamed out and she felt better having someone there for her. She felt much better. With Donghae, she already felt a part of her heart lift. Jessica didn’t feel alone anymore. In a way, Donghae is starting to mend Kris’s damage in her heart.

Jessica just wasn’t ready to talk about her and Kris’s situation. She still couldn’t figure it out for herself. She didn’t understand what was in between them, the reason why they’re butting heads and acting differently. Jessica was also unwilling to accept the fact that Kris might be cheating on her. Things were so jumbled and she needed time to figure everything out.

Because of these puzzling factors, Jessica didn’t reveal anything to Donghae. At least not yet. Donghae was a person she knew she could trust, but it just wasn’t time for her to speak about her possibly crumbling marriage. The entire time Donghae was over was spent with comforting words and hugs. To heal a saddened and heartbroken Jessica, Donghae had made her laugh and feel more carefree and happy the entire time. Donghae knew she was feeling terribly upset, but he knew he wasn’t in place to force the real reasons out of her. All he could do was be there for her because she needed someone.

By the time Donghae had to leave because of an emergency call from the hospital, one of his patients were going into early labor, Jessica was pretty much back to where she started, except the tears had stopped and that she felt better. Of course, the pain in her heart was still there, but Donghae’s company had provided a temporary band-aid for it.

Jessica had fallen asleep on the couch. The loud sound of the front door slamming shut forced her awake. Jessica squinted her eyes and tightened her hold on the couch pillow. She squirmed in her seat, seeing that she had fallen asleep in a balled up manner whilst sitting up. Blinking a couple times, she then took notice that Kris had walked into the room.

The two looked at each other in silence and the tension seemed to surface back again. Jessica noticed the soft look in his eyes, but they seemed so unreadable to her, almost foreign. Blinking her eyes away, she then pulled herself off the couch and dragged her still tired body into the kitchen. Jessica stretched her arms while realizing that she slept a very long time and it was already way past dinner. She hadn’t eaten anything the whole day. Blip must be really hungry.

Reaching for a ceramic bowl, Jessica was about to start on dinner. Her fingers touched the white bowl, but she froze in place when she felt a pair of arms encircle her from behind. The familiar touch of Kris’s head nuzzling into the nape of her neck sent a wave of nostalgia through Jessica.

But the feeling only lasted for a mere second.

Jessica’s sharpened sense of smell from her pregnancy picked up the cherry scented perfume that Kris was covered in. Unknowing tears pricked her eyes, as she wavered in his hold.

“How are you feeling?” Kris’s voice was soft as he acted like nothing ever happened between them.

Jessica only scoffed in disbelief. “Like you care.” She tried to nudge him off, but Kris barely moved.

“Stop acting like that.” Kris tried to snake his arms around her again, but Jessica interfered and smacked his arms off.

Turning around, Jessica was about to confront him, but she stopped short and anger slowly bubbled up. “Start caring about me when you don’t have a lipstick stain on your shirt.” She hissed, shoving him away so she could walk off.

Kris glanced down to see the smeared stain of lipstick on the collar of his shirt and cursed to himself before trying to rub it off. “It’s not what it looks like, Jess.” He chased after her. “Come on.” He tried getting her to face him.

Jessica only paused in the midst of cleaning up the coffee table in the living room. “Right, I’m sure it is. The cherry perfume must be an accident as well. An accident for the past several weeks. Of course.” She spoke in a sharp sarcastic voice before grabbing the two cups off the table.

Kris’s eyes spotted the two cups and his attention changed. “Why are there two cups? Did someone come over?”

“Why? Am I not allowed to have guests over?” Jessica retorted, walking past him.

He only followed her. “I just wanted to know. I don’t get why you’re acting so upset over everything.” Kris was getting frustrated. “You’re getting really bipolar and mad lately.”

Jessica only turned around with widened eyes. “I’m getting bipolar?” she pointed to herself, making Kris sigh out in agitation. “You’re the one getting bipolar. Yesterday, you were getting mad at me and even yelled at me. Now you’re telling me that I’m acting crazy? Now you’re acting like nothing ever happened?”

“I just wanted to know how our baby–”

“Don’t you dare bring my baby into this.” Jessica cut him off. “My baby has nothing to do with this.” She was going to protect her baby, no matter what.

“Your baby?” Kris reiterated in shock. “It’s my baby too! I’m the father of our baby!”

“Well you’re not acting like its father.” Jessica’s words were like daggers and they hit Kris right in the heart. “The father I knew was caring, loving and was more than capable of making me feel like the most important person in the world.” Her voice cracked, signaling the tears that were to come. “You’re not doing any of that right now.”

Kris only took a stand. “The world doesn’t revolve around you, Jessica.” He took her words differently.

“Right, I know it doesn’t.” Jessica held her head down. “I’m sure you’re glad that you don’t want to be a part of my world then.” She figured that’s what he meant.

“Do you even hear what you’re saying?!” Kris’s sudden outburst made Jessica looked up in surprise. “Why do you always take my words and twist them? I never said that I didn’t want to be out of your life! Yes, you’re getting really emotional and I know that the pregnancy hormones aren’t helping, but it’s really getting on my nerves!”

“I’m sorry I’m emotionally insecure then.” Jessica fought back, knowing that every time they have a fight she always has insecurities.

“Why do you have to be insecure?! We’re married for a reason!” Kris really couldn’t wrap his head around her anymore.

“Maybe this marriage doesn’t seem like one! Maybe this marriage feels more like a ball and chain than it does a happy relationship!” Jessica couldn’t help but finally raise her voice at him for the first time. “Maybe you’d be much more happier with Park Hana!!” she screamed, shoving the few plates and bowls off the kitchen counter, shattering on the floor.

Jessica stormed out of the room, as Kris was still at a shock with her actions. Surprised by herself, Jessica felt extremely tired and done. She rushed herself upstairs and into the bedroom. Donghae had let her know that stress and anger isn’t good for her pregnancy. She had just come to the conclusion that if she keeps fighting with Kris any longer, the more she’ll hurt baby blip. She just had to step away and take a breather.

Once she settled herself on the bed, Jessica heard Kris shuffle around downstairs and the sound of keys jingled. Her heart started to pummel and beat against her ribcage hard. Jessica hoped and hoped that he wasn’t about to do what she thinks he’ll do.

But the front door opened and shut.

Kris had left.

{Author's Note}: I know what you're all thinking: "Who is Park Hana?!"

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