Chapter 32: The Truth Is...

I got home with Yuna and headed straight to my room "let's talk Mina" she said walking behind me, I didn't feel like talking, I just wanted to be alone. "Tomorrow, let's talk about it tomorrow" I told her closing my bedroom door behind me. The noise the door made while it shut close was like a signal, I kneeled down next to my door and started crying. I really didn't know what came over me, I hugged my knees to my chest and sobbed into them. I didn't know why I was crying, maybe it was because I had heard his voice for the first time in a long time? Or maybe because I had expected something else from him? The tears weren't of sadness or of anger, strangely, it was odd but I felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders and I felt sort of... happy. Seeing you again made me happy. I sat there until my crying had died down and I made my way to the bathroom to get ready to go to bed. It was only 9 pm but I needed tomorrow to come quicker before I got lost in my thoughts, I wanted to sleep and forget it all of it even for a few hours. 

I got ready for bed and went out to get some water before going to sleeping, Yuna was sitting in front of the TV watching some drama, she looked at me and didn't say a word. I drank some water and went back to my room. I wanted to sleep quickly, but sleep didn't come so easily. I recall all the events that happened tonight, seeing them all felt surreal. But I wanted to escape it, I needed to escape my thoughts, because some days... I mean most days I would lie awake all night thinking of you if I didn't stop myself. I had told myself it was time to move and be happy, but why is the mere sight of you shaking me up like this. I feel like I've taken 3 step forward only to take 20 steps back. I forced myself to fall asleep, but that did not come easily as well. But at least while I'm asleep I only remember the good times we had, the sound of your laughter, your touch and your smile. In my dreams you're with me and I'm with you, everything is not so complicated and we're happy. But by the time I wake up I remember it was just a dream and I hate myself all over again.

Today I told you that I didn't want us to meet again, I hope you know that that was an attempt to hurt you. Even though I won't admit it to anyone, I wanted to see you and now that we've met again, I know I will be waiting for the day that I see you again. Because If I see you I feel like I could breathe again.

The week had past and it was already the weekend, which means the festival was here. The whole week included late night stays at school: preparing, checking things twice and three times over, decorating etc. It was hard but I'm not going to lie and say it wasn't fun, because it was. I had met new people and made new friends, Minhoon being one of them of course, he was kind and thoughtful I was glad to have met him on my first day.  He also didn't ask me how I knew Infinite again, I'm guessing he put two and two together and figured it out himself, he didn't bring them up and acted like that night never happened when I tried to apologise, we had just met but I was already grateful for him. Yuna had this weird idea in her head that him and I would make a cute couple and tried to spike an interest in me towards him, I told her it was too early and I wasn't ready for a new relationship. Speaking of him, I was currently waiting for him to pick us up from our house to go to school together and set up everything for the festival in the afternoon. It was only 7 am and he had promised to pick us up. 

There was a ring at the door "who is it?" I asked "your chauffeur" Minhoon's deep voice replied back causing me to laugh. 

"You're late!" I said joking.

"I'm sorry, there was traffic?" he said not really sure of himself.

"Traffic on a Saturday morning?" I crossed my arms knowing he was lying.

"I stopped by for gas" he laughed. I nodded believing him.

"Aw you two are cute" Yuna's annoying voice emerged from the hallway.

"Shut up" I said "thanks" Minhoon said, I looked at him confused and smiled.

"Let's go" Minhoon said and we tagged along behind him.

We worked the whole day preparing for this, and people are finally coming in. Minhoon and I were backstage making sure everyone was doing what they were suppose to be doing, Yuna was supervising the ticket line. We walked near the stage and saw half of the outdoor venue was already full.

"Wow, there's a lot of people. Which artists were coming again?" I asked looking around at the people wearing clothes that matched our school's official colour.

"There was loads I don't remember which ones and some were added on last minute. It doesn't matter just as long as there are loads of girl groups" Minhoon said chuckling, I side eyed him. 

"You're only doing this for girl groups? You're hopeless, they won't even look at you" I said snorting.

"It's fine I don't need them to look at me, I just need to look at them" I slapped him on the arm.

"You better behave yourself stupid" I hit him again.

"I will I will and I'm not just doing this for them" the noise was getting louder and louder telling me that the groups and singers were already here.

I ignored what Minhoon told me and grabbed him by the hand "let's go."

We walked around to look for his favourite girl group, but couldn't find them anywhere. We weren't allowed near the changing rooms, so we would just have to wait to watch them perform. "No luck" I said "maybe next time" Minhoon wrapped one arm around my shoulder and said "let's go back, it seems like the show is starting."

The show was starting, the people who worked with us rushed to the side of the stage to enjoy the concert. Minhoon and I made our way there and as we were walking, screaming girls wearing an "I LOVE ___" t-shirts rushed behind us knocking me to the ground.

"Are you ok?" Minhoon sounded worried and helped me up.

"I'm fine" I said looking up at him "this isn't the first time I've been knocked to the ground by fangirls" I laughed.

"What does that mean?" Minhoon frowned looking confused.

"I'll explain later" Minhoon held out his hand, I hesitated before taking it anyway.

"Your jeans are ripped" he said stopping me. My knees had hit the ground hard and ripped my jeans near my knees.

"It's okay I look fashion forward now" I said causing him to laugh. Minhoon bent down to the ground and examined my knee, he then tied my shoelace that had come undone. I stood there staring down at him, not really wanting to stop him but also not knowing what do. He looked at me, his eyes were beautiful, he was very handsome. He got up and towered over me with his tall height. "Thankfully you're not hurt" he tucked my hair behind my ear and I stood there like an idiot gawking at him.

"Minhoon!" some guy shouted causing us to snap out of whatever the hell just happened. "Come on the show already started, your favourite group is about to perform."

"I'm coming" Minhoon said sounding really annoyed. He held my hand again without thinking, we walked together. We saw Yuna standing there watching the show at the side of the stage. We made our way towards her and her eyes landed on our hands together, Minhoon realised and let go of me embarrassed. She giggled and gave me a weird look, I looked away not really wanting to get in to her foolishness. I was enjoying the concert and one by one groups went on stage and performed, they walked by me as they went up the stairs to the stage, no groups I liked were performing today unfortunately. 

Suddenly, I hear laughter behind me and I turn around intrigued, and guess what? It was them. How can this possibly happen, they weren't even on the list of the people that was suppose to perform- ah that's right, Minhoon did mention artists that were added on last minute, out of people why did it have to be them. Their backs were to me and it seemed someone was missing, it was him. Was he not here? Did he have somewhere else to be? Was he sick? Did something happen? Ah... please get a hold of yourself, why do you even care. I turned back around and focused on the people that were performing, the cheers were loud and I couldn't make out what they were saying anyway. The group performing finished and it was time for them to perform, they walked towards the stage and I titled my head just a bit so I could see them and he was there, dressed in his stage outfit, his microphone in his hand, he was fixing his earpiece and laughing about something with Dongwoo, he looked absolutely gorgeous. I missed that smile. Shut up. They were about 7 feet away from me, but thankfully they didn't see me. They finally made their way to the stage and started performing, they had so many fans in the crowd and he seemed to be the crowds favourite. He was so cool on stage, it made me realise all over again why I fell for him in the first place. Seeing him so close again made me miss him even more, your so close but yet so far away, how am I suppose to ever get over you?

"Are you ok?" Minhoon said. I looked up at him and realised I was tearing up.

"I'm fine" I said.

"I'm sorry I didn't know they were performing" Yuna said apologetically. 

"It's fine" I smiled. Minhoon ruffled my hair and told me to cheer up. I smiled at him and he pinched my cheek.

The music got louder as the cheers go louder, I decided not pay attention to their stage, it only made me think about nonsensical things.

"Do you wanna go sit down backstage?" Minhoon asked.

"Hmm let's go" I turned around and as I was I locked eyes with him, he was looking directly at me and I had not realised, he stood staring at me while s talked to the audience. I looked back at him in shock.

MYUNGSOO'S POV:

My members and I were getting ready to get on stage, Dongwoo was being his usual self and making stupid jokes that always make me laugh. He was trying to lighten up the tension in the room, ever since he had met Mina again they were all feeling awkward and upset, we didn't know what to do nor did any of us want to address this. We made our way to the stage and started performing our songs, we performed three song before having to interact with our fans. I stood there analysing the crowd and I saw Minhoon, he was standing there with his arm around someone, her head was turned the other so I didn't know who it was. She lifted her head, and it revealed a tired and sad looking Mina, I took a step back. What were they doing here? Why were they together? Did they go to school here? My thoughts were cut off as he bent down to her level and whispered something in her ear, she nodded and caught my eyes whilst around. Right there, she saw me. She saw me looking at her and looked at me in shock. I had no intention in turning away, I was annoyed, the sight of her with another guy annoyed me, but I knew I had no right to. I wanted to run to her right there and then, but I couldn't. I turned away realising I had people and fans watching me. I turned back around and she was gone, so was he, where did they go? Sungyeol signaled to me that we had to continue performing. We performed a few more songs before saying goodbye to the audience and headed backstage. I took off my mic and ear piece "I'll be right back" I told the members before heading... Actually I didn't know where I was heading. I went to look for them I guess, I looked around and couldn't find them anywhere, did they leave together? After awhile I gave and decided to head back, I really don't know what I was doing. I walked passed a small cafe inside the school and spotted her sitting there, alone. I stood there for a couple seconds before taking up on the courage to talk to her. 

"Hello" I said walking up behind her.

She snapped her head around, and got up so fast she stumbled backwards, I reached out to grab her out of instinct but she pushed my hands away.

"What do you want?" She said with the same shocked expression she had earlier.

"I walked by and saw you, I just wanted to... Actually I don't know myself" I said leaning against a small table.

"Well enjoy yourself because I'm leaving" she said walking away, before she could even take two steps I held her by the hand.

"Don't go, don't leave me behind again" I whispered my voice cracking.

"What?'' she said looking back at me.

"Stay, just talk to me" I tightened my grip on her hand "I missed you" I don't know why I just said that.

She removed my hand from hers and looked at me in the eyes "I have no reason to talk to you, didn't I ask for you to leave me alone and to ignore me the next time you see me?"

I pulled her in for a hug out before she could say anymore, I don't know why I did that maybe because I had longed for her body to be pressed against mine for so long "I miss you."

I felt her body tense up against mine and she pushed me away, hard.

"Why are doing this to me?" she looked at me "did you not hear me before? I don't want to meet you again, I don't want to see nor hear about you again. You miss me? Really? I almost feel bad because I haven't missed you for a very long time now" her words cut me like knife, but I know I deserved it.

"I'm sorry..." is all I could say.

"You're too late, you're way too late. I'm over you, I'm done with you. I don't feel anything for you anymore, you're standing here in front of me but I feel nothing. All the tears, the pain and the time I wasted on you seem so meaningless now. So please just please do yourself and I a favour don't look for me again. The mere sight of your disgusts me" she said with her eyes filled with anger. I couldn't believe those words came out from , I couldn't believe that I turned her into this person. The person I once loved and cherished was not the person standing in front of me right now, she was a whole new person and that was all my fault. It hurt, a lot.

MINA'S POV:

I said all those words I didn't mean and every single one of them was sharp lie that cut my tongue every time I uttered them, but I was angry and every time I saw him different emotions would come over me. The words 'I miss you' hurt me like sharp glass and made my chest feel tight, I wanted to shout those words back to him knowing that was all I ever wanted to tell him, but I couldn't I guess my wound was still so deep and so fresh that I couldn't find it in me to forgive you. I'm sorry, I guess the selfish side of me wanted to feel everything I felt for you.

His lonely and sad back turned to face me as he walked away with heavy steps and there was only one thing on my mind, only one thing I wanted to ask him, I need to ask him.

"Why didn't you call me? Or text me or anything? Why didn't you reach out to me if you missed me?" I asked loudly enough so he would hear.

His head turned to face and I could see the tears in his eyes "I did, everyday, I called, texted, visited you, your neighbour told me you had moved and I figured you chanced your number to avoid me. I even told Yuna to tell you that I did months ago" he said and walked away.

"Liar! Come back and tell me the truth, tell me you were a corward that couldn't face the girl you threw away! COME BACK!" I shouted behind him but he was long gone.

He was a liar, I didn't get anything. Yes my phone broke a few days after I moved out from infinite's house but Yuna had sorted it out for me... he is lying there was no way Yuna wouldn't tell me.

Right?

I went home after the festival ended and Yuna was no where to be found, I paced back and forth waiting for her to come home. I waited an hour before the front door opened.

"Yuna!" I headed towards her "why are you so late?"

"Where were you? I looked for you everywhere!" Yuna exclaimed.

"I met Myungsoo" I said and she froze in place.

"I met him and he said some weird things Yuna..." she didn't look at me and made her way to the kitchen to get some water.

"What did he say?" she said still not looking at me.

"He said he called me everyday, he texted everyday and he even came to our old house but didn't see me. He also said he met you a few months ago and told you to tell me all of this... How could he lie so bodly? Does he not know I could just ask him? Wow how could I like someone so shameless-"

"I have something to tell you" Yuna said trailing off and finally looking at me.

"The truth is..."