Ch. [05]
Blue Tomorrow
Hyukjae breathed in and out deeply, biting his shaky lower lip and trembling in nervousness as he knocked Kyuhyun’s studio’s door. Some seconds passed and Hyukjae was really tempted to just run away. “I can do this…,” he whispered and sighed deeply, knocking once again.
“What?!” An annoyed voice could be heard and Hyukjae dared himself to open the door and peek inside the neat and clean room.
“K-Kyuhyun-shi?” Hyukjae called nervously.
“It’s obvious that it’s me,” Kyuhyun said frowning deeply without even looking at him. “What are you doing here? You want to also ruin my work?” he asked coldly and Hyukjae felt it again, the sharp pain that crossed his body whenever Kyuhyun talked to him like that.
“No…,” Hyukjae said, not wanting to fight again. “It’s just that…,” he bit his lower lip nervously. “I must attend the court tomorrow morning a-and… t-they wanted me to give you this…,” he said holding a paper in the air.
Kyuhyun frowned and reached his hand to Hyukjae.
Hyukjae walked forward, biting his lower lip and handing the document with both hands, looking down. Kyuhyun wanted to laugh at how alike was him and Chaerin. But Kyuhyun hated Hyukjae so much that he would never allow himself to laugh in front of the one who ruined his family. It was enough having him living under the same roof already.
Kyuhyun looked at the paper. It was an envelope sealed, which meant Hyukjae hadn’t read it before and it had Siwon’s handwritten on the back of it. A simple ‘To my dear brother, Kyuhyun’ adorning it. “Why do you have this?”
Hyukjae flinched lightly. “I-I don’t know…,” he said honestly. He thought the lawyer would give it to Kyuhyun directly, but instead he told Hyukjae to do so.
“Go away, I’m getting annoyed just seeing you here,” Kyuhyun said and Hyukjae pursed his lips in order for him not to let go a single tear because maybe Kyuhyun would never know how hurtful every word of his were for him.
Kyuhyun glanced as Hyukjae left his studio and he opened the envelope. There was a small letter inside and he wanted to scream because he had no idea of how many mysteries his dear brother had left for him after his death. “You had to do everything for that stupid Siwon, he was your ruin,” he mumbled as he unfolded the paper and started to read.
There was no second in which Kyuhyun didn’t frown while reading. It wasn’t long, but it was extremely ridiculous.
“Kyuhyun, if you’re reading this, it means I’m death. It also means my loving wife, Hyukjae, and my daughter, Chaerin, are living with you. I don’t expect you to treat them like your own family, I highly doubt you will ever accept them. But Kyuhyun; there is one thing I want to ask you, as a brother… and as a man.
Eventually, you will find out and realize how precious Hyukjae is, how perfect his eyes are, how his single smile can change your day for the better. He’s crying right now Kyuhyun, at night you will find him crying. He’s always like that.
What I ask you, is to take care of him. Not only to keep them safe. I mean to love them as much as I once did. I want you to give them everything I couldn’t.
If you have no one by your side Kyuhyun, please take care of my family. There’s no one else I trust the most for taking care and love them. I know you can do it, I know you can love them as your own family.
My last wish for you is to keep this treasure of mine, protected and loved.
Sincerely, Siwon.”
“This is ridiculous!” Kyuhyun exclaimed throwing the letter away. There was no way he was going to do that, not when the one ruining his brother and his whole family was Hyukjae.
Let’s ruin his life the same way he ruined ours! His mother had told him nights before when she called and asked how was Kyuhyun doing living with such a disgusting being. We can’t allow him to take away what is rightful ours. He took away Siwon from us and now he’s taking away what we own.
Kyuhyun frowned and clenched his fists, that’s right, he didn’t know what was Siwon thinking when he wrote that but he wasn’t going to allow Hyukjae to smile freely. Not in his own house.
And much less, Kyuhyun was going to love him.
•●•●•●•●•●•●•●•●•
Kyuhyun sighed deeply as he sat up in his bed, running his fingers through his hair and feeling his tired body asking for some more rest. But he couldn’t go back to sleep and he needed to arrange everything so he could go and visit his mother.
After a few minutes of Kyuhyun stretching his arms tiredly, he heard his cell phone ringing and he sighed when he saw his mother’s number displaying in the small screen. “Hello?” he answered standing up and going to see himself in the mirror, messing his hair.
“Kyuhyunnie, are you coming today?” Jihyun asked and Kyuhyun knew she was all alone, maybe sad and depressed.
“Of course mom, I’ll be there for lunch,” Kyuhyun answered and went to his closet to get some clean clothes.
“I’ll wait for you then, don’t be late Kyuhyunnie, you know I don’t like to wait…,” Jihyun said and Kyuhyun chuckled.
“I won’t mom, I’ll be there on time,” Kyuhyun said taking out one brand new black suit and leaving it over his bed.
“Okay then, see you later my son,” Jihyun said lovingly and Kyuhyun hung up after a few seconds.
Kyuhyun looked at his watch, he had barely time to arrive there to lunch and he closed his eyes, sighing loudly, realizing how tired he was and how drained his body felt. He stretched his limbs one more time before stepping into the bathroom.
When Kyuhyun finally went out of his room, he looked around his house and raised an eyebrow, it was neat clean, everything seemed to be arranged in its own place and the furniture was shiny and clean.
He walked to his studio and frowned, it was cleaned as well and he would make sure to yell at Hyukjae the next day because the smaller wasn’t allowed to touch his stuff and the simple thought made Kyuhyun purse his lips in annoyance. But Kyuhyun realized, everything was left exactly as he had left it. It was as if Hyukjae cleaned meticulously, making sure to put everything in its own place again, the exact same angle.
Kyuhyun frowned and just grabbed what he needed and went out, taking the extra suit with him and going to his car. It was then that Kyuhyun realized Hyukjae’s car wasn’t parked and it was Saturday, Chaerin had no school.
Kyuhyun knew Hyukjae and his daughter would spend the weekends enclosed in their rooms, they would never make noise or go out.
But that weekend they weren’t there and Kyuhyun chuckled. “Maybe he finally ed away,” he said and left his spare suit in the back seat before fixing himself in the driver’s seat and starting the engine.
It took Kyuhyun a little bit longer for him to reach his mother’s house and he sighed because at least he was still on time. “Kyuhyun! My precious son!” Jihyun received him with a bright smile, running towards him and hugging him tightly.
Kyuhyun hugged his mother back and smiled. “I’m home,” he announced and his mother quickly grinned and dragged him inside the house.
Lunch was tiring, Kyuhyun decided. Because if it was not a deathly silence, it was a really fierce talk about how much they hated Hyukjae and the girl. Though Kyuhyun didn’t really hated the girl, she had no blame for what Hyukjae did.
“Will you come for dinner?” Jihyun asked when Kyuhyun told her that he would be going out for a while.
“I don’t think so,” Kyuhyun said fixing his suit. “But I’ll come back to sleep and we can have breakfast tomorrow morning,” he said smiling and his mother smiled back at him.
“Okay then, let’s go visit Siwon’s grave tomorrow after breakfast,” Jihyun said and Kyuhyun could notice how her voice became shaky.
Kyuhyun simply hummed, turning around and going into his car because he didn’t feel like watching his mother cry again. It was too much for both of them and Kyuhyun felt every second guiltier. Because Kyuhyun didn’t spend quality time with his brother, not even when the other always insisted in them to do so.
Kyuhyun wasn’t supposed to go to that place a day before the one month anniversary of Siwon’s death. He wasn’t supposed to walk through the green place towards his brother’s grave, not when he had to go a day after.
He stopped when he saw two figures kneeling down in front of Siwon’s grave and his expression softened when he realized it was Hyukjae and Chaerin.
Kyuhyun didn’t realize, he didn’t noticed when a bitter smile crawled up his lips. He watched how Hyukjae was kneeling down and Chaerin was hugging him gently, as if protecting her own mother. He could hear the soft sobs coming from both of them and he remembered the day Siwon was buried.
Hyukjae wasn’t allowed to be there, but Kyuhyun knew he was hidden behind a tree, watching carefully and swallowing his own tears because he could do nothing when his husband’s body was thrown into the darkness and cold ground.
Kyuhyun had noticed that day and he didn’t tell anyone, somehow, he could only watch carefully how Hyukjae was crying, letting out his tears and Kyuhyun remembered thinking how human and vulnerable Hyukjae looked like that.
The scene was repeating because Kyuhyun never left the graveyard a month before and looked how Hyukjae cried in front of his husband’s grave, just like right then. He walked ahead and stood not far from the two figures. “What are you doing here?” he asked and Hyukjae jumped in surprise, turning towards him with shocked eyes.
“I-I’m sorry,” Hyukjae apologized standing up and pulling Chaerin up with him. “I’m leaving already,” he said and nudged his little girl to follow him.
“I didn’t ask you to leave, I asked you what are you doing here?” Kyuhyun asked and he felt slightly bad because Hyukjae’s eyes were red and swollen, he had obviously cried the entire day.
“I-I…,” Hyukjae bit his lip and looked down, his daughter hugging his leg while sobbing softly. “I just wanted to greet him…,” he whispered looking at Siwon’s grave. “I miss him…”
“You’re not allowed to be here,” Kyuhyun said and Hyukjae looked up with big, pleading eyes.
“Please don’t tell anybody…,” Hyukjae said nervously, terrified eyes looking at Kyuhyun as if he were a monster.
In that very moment, Kyuhyun thought he actually was.
“It’s hard to believe trash can miss someone,” Kyuhyun said without actually thinking his words and regretting them when he saw Chaerin looking up at him, big, teary eyes.
“Go to the car baby,” Hyukjae commanded to his daughter who looked at Kyuhyun with sad eyes before nodding and running to Hyukjae’s white car. “Do you really need to insult me in front of her?” Hyukjae then asked biting his lower lip. “In front of my husband’s grave as well?”
Kyuhyun frowned. “I would yell at the world how filthy you are if I had the chance,” he said and Hyukjae pursed his lips, tears sliding down his cheeks.
“I don’t know why you hate me so much Kyuhyun,” Hyukjae said firmly. “I wish you would tell me so I can fix it because it’s tiring when you treat me this way all the time…”
“There’s nothing you can fix anyways,” Kyuhyun said looking at Hyukjae from head to toe. “You will always be the same that got my brother under your spell to take away his money.”
Hyukjae gasped and looked up at Kyuhyun. “How can you say something like that?!” he asked almost yelling. “I loved him! I loved Siwon with all my soul! How can you dare to say I didn’t?! How can you know my feelings?!” and Kyuhyun could see the tears streaming down endlessly. “You have no idea how much I loved him! You have no idea how much I miss him now!”
“You miss his money! Not him! You came to destroy my family! Do you know how much time I couldn’t spend with my own brother because he had to go out on a date with you?!” Kyuhyun asked loudly. “You just ruined my family! Just when we were already getting used to it!”
Hyukjae pursed his lips. “If you didn’t spend time with him, it was because you are so blind as to even want to see me, you were welcomed anytime at our home, we invited you to have dinner with us so many times and you rejected them all. I’m not the guilty one here.”
“No, you’re the that ruined everything!” Kyuhyun frowned deeper. “And now you also want to take away our money! Not only my brother was enough for you right? Are you disappointed he died before giving you a bigger fortune?”
And Kyuhyun knew he half deserved the slap that landed in his cheek. “Don’t say that,” Hyukjae warned firmly. “I love my husband, don’t you dare say otherwise.”
Kyuhyun turned towards Hyukjae, glaring at him with eyes full of hate. “Don’t touch me ,” he said grabbing Hyukjae’s wrist and pushing him back, making the smaller fall down to the grass. “You’re not allowed to lay a finger on me, not when you’re so low.”
Hyukjae looked down the grass, tears storming out from his eyes. “Mommy!” Chaerin called worried from the car, already running towards him.
“Stay there Chaerin!” Hyukjae yelled firmly and the girl stopped, looking at her mother and then at Kyuhyun.
It was then, that Kyuhyun could see the fear in the girl’s eyes, the fear she had for him. Kyuhyun became a monster and it was all because of Hyukjae. He could see how Chaerin was horrified just looking at him and he looked at Hyukjae standing up from the grass with his eyes still down.
“There will be a moment Kyuhyun, and you will realize that money isn’t all,” Hyukjae said mumbling and turning around, walking away without letting Kyuhyun even answer at him.
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