Mistake
ft. JSSH

boy x boy; slice of life (i guess ^^); reflection on mistakes; schoolbased; alternate age ( all the same age for this fic);

WARNING: BRIEF PROFANITIES & MENTION OF UAL ACTIVITY [NOT FULLY DESCRIBED]

--- (JONGSOO) --- (JSSH) --- (SEHAN) ---

"Jongsoo."

The dark-haried teen, Jongsoo, looked up to see his two good friends, Yitao and Baekyeol behind him.

"What?" He said harshly, turning around from where he was sitting at. Just minutes ago, all six, Sehan, Jongsoo, Yitao, Baekyeol, Joonxing, and Xiuchen, graduated from high school. Jongsoo deviated from his friends, to sit at the sidewalk where the senior parking lot was. It took only a few minutes for Yitao and Baekyeol to find him; it wasn't that hard.

"Jongsoo…come on…lets go to the after party."

"No…I-I'm good."

Baekyeol sighed and knelt down beside his friend. "Jongsoo…please. This is practically the last time that we get to see our classmates. Lets go."

"I said, I'm good." He turned to face the wavy-haired teen. "Just go with everyone…I'm not going."

Yitao clicked his tongue and ran his hand through his hair. "You know…you have to move on." He said with a little of tiredness in his voice. "Sehan did."

Jongsoo tighten his hands to form fists. "I know that."

"Well, just saying. You've been moping since the 2nd half of senior year and it is starting to get annoying. Everyone in our group…everyone in the school knows what happened Jongsoo. Well, we know much more, but everyone --"

"Well you didn't have to repeat it!" Jongsoo by then stood up and immediately grabbed a hold of Yitao's front, tightening his hold of his graduation gown that he was still wearing. Baekyeol jumped up right away, trying to pull Jongsoo away from his panda like boyfriend.

"S-stop it! Please!!" Both teens narrowed their eyes at each other like wolfs getting ready to attack. "Stop it!" Baekyeol said a little bit louder. He squeezed in-between them, standing in front of Yitao, and pushing Jongsoo back a bit. "Jongsoo please calm down --"

"Tell that son of a that he has no right to tell me that I should just stop feeling what I am feeling right now. You don't know what I am going through Yitao. You have no ing clue!"

Yitao tighten his lips; he grabbed Baekyeol's hand. "Whatever Jongsoo. Have a good night, see you later." With that, Yitao pulled Baekyeol away from the other, leaving him behind. Baekyeol looked over his shoulder, displaying watery eyes; he hated when his friends were like this. As they were out of Jongsoo's line of vision, he groaned and sat back on the sidewalk. He rested his head on his knees and tried his best to control his breathing.

"It just had to happen… huh…."

--- (JONGSOO) --- (JSSH) --- (SEHAN) ---

It was starting to get late, and Jongsoo was still sitting at the senior parking lot. His classmates, even teachers noticed that he was there, but he told all of them to leave him alone.

His parents, Jongin and Kyungsoo, even found him sitting by himself, but like the others he wished to be by himself. Kyungsoo, being worried, tried his best to bring Jongsoo home, but the other refused and just asked his parents to leave him be. Respecting their son's wish, they left him alone.

"I guess I had this coming." He sighed as he rested his chin on his arms, that were resting on top of his knees. He leaned over to the side to grab his cellphone. After he unlocked it, he went to his photo album, scrolling all the way back to his freshman year. Most pictures were of him and Sehan, and the rest were of random photos.

Jongsoo smiled at the very first picture of him and Sehan. Even back then, he was cute. He started to reflect back on their relationship together; remembering it as if it was yesterday.

He started to shake his head and close his phone. 'I'm probably the most stupidest person in the world right? If not…the worst person to ever live.' He stood up and dusted himself off. Jongsoo wanted to run away; anywhere  but here. He got out of the empty school parking lot, now onto the main road, he started to walk aimlessly around the stores that were open this late at night.

He came across a small diner that was open 24 hours. Not having a particular place to go, he went inside. There were a few people inside, having their late night dinner; Jongsoo stood there, looking left and right, anyone to tell him it would be okay to sit down.

"Good evening!" The happy waitress sang, irritating the graduate a bit. "Sit anywhere you like and I'll be there in a minute."

Jongsoo nodded; he made his way to a booth near the window. He ped his graduate gown, now into his much more casual clothing. Unlike the rest of the males in his graduating class, he didn't wear any formal clothing. Instead, he went casual, t-shirt and a pair of red skinnies with black converse. He placed his graduation cap on the table and placed his gown on the other side of him, tossing it with no care.

He situated himself, glancing at the window. The more that he looked, the more he started to reminisce about Sehan.

"You mean a lot to me Jongsoo! A whole lot!!"

"Jongsoo, lets see a movie together?"

"Jongsoo! You didn't have to visit me at work!"

"I love you Jongsoo!"

The graduate bit his lip, trying to prevent himself from crying.

'Sehan --'

"What would you like?" The voice broke his thoughts; he looked up to see the waitress holding onto a pad and pen. "We have coffee if you like…variety of tea…soft drinks…we have warm food and desserts." She pointed at the menu that was under the glass table. Jongsoo nodded, but ordered a cup of black coffee and a slice of cake. "You got it!" With that, the waitress left, leaving Jongsoo to his thoughts again.

--- (JONGSOO) --- (JSSH) --- (SEHAN) ---

As Jongsoo got his ordered items, he constantly stared at the outside, watching cars pass by and people walking.

He started to think of memories past.

He remembered how he and Sehan came to be an item. It was all thanks to Joonxing; their little cupid.

'Freshman year…right?'

Jongsoo then wasn't much interested in having a male and male relationship. He always thought that he was straight, despite his parents being both male, however, that didn't mean Jongsoo was a close minded person. He started to experiment, having Sehan as his guinea pig.

Over the months, Sehan started to grow on him. He liked the way Sehan would greet him in the morning with a big smile on his face, he liked the way Sehan would make lunch for him and himself, he even liked how Sehan was helpful not only to him, but to others as well.

To him, at that time, he was lucky to have Sehan by his side, even though the two were complete opposite.

Jongsoo was more of a social type of guy. Talking to people here and there, not to mention have fun once in a while. Sure, he was an open flirt, but he assured Sehan that his heart belonged to Sehan, and to Sehan only, while Sehan was such a model student.

Sophomore year approached and still Sehan and Jongsoo's relationship still stood strong, even though the two had arguments here and there, but what relationship didn't have those? However, Jongsoo started to make new friends; friends that was partly not in the same circle. Being a troublemaker, he started to make friends in the same category. Friends that were enjoying consuming alcohol, smoking, and partaking in ual activities for their amusement. Jongsoo was mostly in for the alcohol and smoking, thinking that it was fine, but on a certain night with his new found friends, indulging much alcohol that night, he ended up have ual with someone from the party; not just with one, but with another.

As he woke up, he realized what he has done. He decided to hide it from Sehan. After all, he felt pretty confident that Sehan would never find out.

Jongsoo took a sip of his black coffee before setting it back down on the table. He was now one of the few that were still in the diner. The laugher of the other group filled his ears; how he wished that he could hear Sehan's cute and perfect laugh once again, but he knew that it would never come.

"Sir, would you like a refill?"

The graduate looked up and gave a simple nod. "That would be great…thanks." He said softly.

The waitress nodded and poured the coffee in his cup. She left afterwards to cater the other people in the diner.

As Jongsoo looked back at the outside, the memories of Junior year started to roll like old film in his mind. He started to shake his head, placing his hands on either side.

Junior year wasn't particularly bad, but arguments started to become more frequent. He remembered how Sehan would try and help him to stop his partying ways, but he would always argue saying he could do whatever he wanted.

'Sehan was looking out for you…you idiot.'

Jongsoo tightly closed his eyes as he recalled an event he wished he could take back. An argument happened once again, during the his and Sehan's lunch hour. All he wanted to do is smoke a little before the bell rings, but the smaller just had to ruin it for him. One thing led to another and Jongsoo couldn't take it any more; he slapped Sehan hard across the face, earning gasp from their friends.

'I hate myself…I hate myself…I hate myself…' Jongsoo chanted to himself as he remembered how back then he was unfazed at what he has done. The tears b at the corners of Sehan's eyes, how the smaller ran from the scene, and all he did then was stand there, placing the cigarette between his lips and striking it with the lit fire from his lighter.

"Jongsoo!! Why did you do that?!" Echoed Xiuchen's voice.

"What the is your problem man?" Jongsoo heard Yitao yell at him. "Are you listening to me?! Jongsoo!!"

Jongsoo tightly closed his eyes before opening them quickly. He looked around to see that he was now the only one in the diner. He breathed slowly in and out, before rubbing the back of his neck. 

'I'm sorry for hitting you Sehan…'

The graduate sighed catching the waitress' attention. She was about to get off from her shift and let the waiter do his hours, but instead of heading out, she went straight to Jongsoo.

"Is…everything okay?" She asked with concern in her tone. Jongsoo wanted to shoo her off, but he decided to go against it.

"Yeah."

"Something is bothering you…right?"

Jongsoo didn't give an answer; instead he looked away, back to the window. The waitress understood and decided to leave the other alone. She bid him a goodnight and left the diner.

The graduate sighed, resting his hand on his cheek.

'Senior year was the worst huh?'

As he recollected the last year of his high school career, it was probably the worst. From sophomore year, the two people that he had with, in which he remembered their names to be twins Byeoungkeun and Guijin, transferred to his school. Of course the two thought Jongsoo was the same just like those years before.

Jongsoo was still doing his alcohol and smoking, but didn't have any ual activity with anyone else since those two. When they asked why he hasn't partaken any, he informed them that his on and off again boyfriend, Sehan, was the type to wait for the right moment and that he would like to do it with him.

The two thought that it was such a waste to perfect body. They were able to persuade Jongsoo to have another go of a act.

He thought about it, and thought, why not. He was off with Sehan at the moment, plus he didn't have to know.

The three went to an empty classroom where they did their . The two transferees gave Jongsoo absolute pleasure, one giving him lustful kisses while the other used his skilled tongue to lap against Jongsoo's manhood.

Jongsoo thought that he had everything all planned, however, his plan backfired when he heard the door open, revealing the only person that he didn't want to catch him in such an affair.

All he remembered was how hurt Sehan was; the papers and folders fell from his gentle and soft hands onto the floor. Jongsoo remembered how he wanted to call out, but instead, moans escaped from his lips.

Sehan did not hesitate; he sprinted away from the scene. Soon the two that were giving Jongsoo pleasure chuckled, telling the taller that he deserved someone or some people that were willing to give him satisfaction.

"That Sehan kid will never give you pleasure like how we do. He is such chaste person." Byeoungkeun said with a chuckle in his voice.

"Someone with this type of body," Guijin started to run his gentle hands up and down on Jongsoo's tone body, appreciating the abs against his fingers before resting on top of the other's manhood, gently it. "Should be shared with all…not just one." He looked at Jongsoo through his long eye lashes. "Right?"

Instead of answering them, Byeoungkeun placed a rough kiss against Jongsoo's lips.

That was the day that he lost Sehan.

As weeks passed since the incident, Jongsoo didn't bother apologizing to the other, thinking over on what the pleasure twins said. At that time, he thought that they were right. He was a boy with such a god's body and it should be shared with all.

He continued to have ual desires, sleeping here and there with other people, telling them that he and Sehan were no long an item, as well as do other things like drinking and smoking.

For him at the time, he thought that it was the best; he was the machine.

During the last 4 months until the seniors' graduation, he started to get bored with the partners that he had fulfilling his ual needs. Up until then, he and Sehan never even glanced at each other.

It started to bother Jongsoo a bit, unable to understand why. What bothered him the most is that Sehan would be hanging out with another, as if they were close. From time to time, he was see them holding hands, or laughing at each other's jokes.

He soon came to learn that the one pursuing Sehan, Minjun, was a year below them. Even though he was a year younger, he was tall and such a handsome boy. From what he heard, Minjun was in the student council as treasure for his year, a player of the soccer team, and also participating in a few after school clubs. He was practically a person that people admire, something that Jongsoo was not.

The graduate rested his head against his hands as he looked down at his black coffee. He bit his now abused lips. 'No matter what I do…I can't get rid of it.'

Jongsoo thought back at how he caught Sehan and Minjun kissing just beside Sehan's locker. Being that it was after school, the two started to get into it a bit more.

Anger is what filled his mind as he witness his once boyfriend kissing another.

He hated it.

The next thing Jongsoo knew was that he was punching Minjun's sweet face. The screams from Sehan alerted teachers that were still in their classroom. It took two to three educators to pull Jongsoo off.

He was about to yell at Minjun for kissing what was his, but instead, was slapped harshly by Sehan.

"What is your problem?!!" Sehan's voice echoed in his mind. "You were hurting my boyfriend!!"

Hearing that last sentence pierced Jongsoo right in the heart. He didn't know that it would hurt this much, thinking that he was over Sehan, but just hearing that one word, it changed everything.

--- (JONGSOO) --- (JSSH) --- (SEHAN) ---

Tears started to fall from his eyes, dripping on the onto the glass table.

'I messed up…I messed up…I messed up.'

He chanted as he wiped the tears away from his eyes, yet tears kept returning back. Jongsoo really thought that he was done being with one person, but seeing Sehan with another ticked him off.

Jongsoo hiccuped as he continued to let tears fall. 'I want Sehan back.' He hiccuped. 'I-I want Sehan…b-back.'

He didn't think that he would want Sehan back this much. After all, Sehan was always concerned, considerate towards him, and not to forget affectionate even if it was just simple kisses. Sehan is probably the best person anyone could have as a boyfriend; he had qualities that are just perfect.

And he just had to be one to drive that person away.

He started to miss Sehan, but no matter how he thought of a plan to get him back, it just wouldn't work. How would Sehan forgive him for the things that he did. He participated in such sinful and horrible activities that not he himself would take back.

As he sat in the booth, still glancing down at the table, he knew that he lost the most important person in his life.

"Are you done?"

Jongsoo blinked; knowing well whose voice that it belonged to. He looked up to see Sehan sitting right in front of him, leaning back against the seat.

"S-Sehan? H-how…how --"

"I saw you through the window." He said bluntly. "Your parents called my house…they were looking for you. Didn't you hear your cell?"

'M-my cell?' Jongsoo fished out his phone, pressing the home button, but realizing that it was dead. "B-battery. My battery died."

"Hm. Figures." Sehan crossed his arms over his stomach. "Does your parents even know that we are not together? It sounds like they think that we are together still."

"I-I…I --"

"I didn't say anything…to save sometime from talking to them, I just said 'yes'. They said that you were still at the parking lot at school? But when I was there, you were gone." He checked his watch. "And since it is almost midnight, and this this the only place open 24 hours…I figured that you were here and I was right. Saw you through the window."

It was silent between them. Jongsoo couldn't believe that he was Sehan was right in front of him. He for sure thought that Sehan would just say yes to his parents to find him, and not go, but instead, Sehan went out searching for him.

"You didn't have to go and search for me."

"Thats true. I didn't have too."

"B-but then…why did you?"

Sehan looked at him, tightening his lips before speaking. "Because that is not my personality to reject parents who are looking for their child."

'O-oh…thats true.'

"Look Jongsoo…go home. Why are you even here…huh? Why?"

"I…just wanted to reflect on some things."

"Reflect? On what?"

"On…o-on…erm…on us."

"Us?" Sehan said with a little anger in his voice. "Us? There is no us Jongsoo. I'm pretty sure there wasn't an 'us' since you and I started going out --"

"N-no! You're wrong! There was an 'us'. I --"

"Oh yeah…I'm sure that there was right…when you were drinking,..smoking…having some with other people. Yeah, we were together while you did all of those behind my back. Yeah, we were perfect. You were the perfect boyfriend."

"I wasn't --"

"What? No, no, you were a perfect boyfriend. Really!" He said with sarcasm in his tone. "You were my prince."

By then, tears started to fall from Jongsoo's eyes. "S-Sehan…I'm so sorry. I treated you so horribly…and I know…I know that I wouldn't be able to get you back i-immediately…but I would like to earn your trust again." Jongsoo truly wanted to work things out, fix them to make them better.

He came to realize that he truly loved Sehan and was blinded by the desires.

Sehan slowly smiled at the other, making Jongsoo's heart beat. He could win over Sehan again.

"No."

Or so Jongsoo thought.

"N-no?"

Sehan chuckled and shook his head. "No. Why would I give you another chance?"

"W-wha…b-but --"

"No, seriously Jongsoo." Sehan then narrowed his eyes at the other. "Please…tell me. I would like to hear the explanation. Give me a reason why I should take you…no, give you a second chance when you hurt me to much in the past?"

Jongsoo couldn't even think of a reason. All he could think about is how he messed up and how wished that he could take Sehan back.

"I…I --"

"Well?"

"I love you. I…I really love you."

"Love?" Sehan scoffed. "Yeah right. Those 3 and a half years were love right?"

"Freshman year I did love you."

"Yeah right. I actually thought that you did, but I guess not." Sehan leaned over the table, resting his elbow on the table. He was getting bored of the conversation already, and he wanted to go home and be with Minjun. "Look, Jongsoo. Go home. Your parents are waiting for you…and Minjun is waiting for me."

Jongsoo's lips tighten. "Minjun? You were with him?"

"Of course. But I had to end on what we were doing just so I can find you."

Many things raced in the graduate's mind. The two could have been doing various things and one in particular stuck out his mind. They could have been in the process of having .

"If you want to know…" Sehan stood up from his seat. "We were about to…if you catch my drift. At least Minjun is faithful, kind-hearted…things that you are not Jongsoo. You are not even a man."

Sehan was about to leave when Jongsoo quickly got up from his seat. He grabbed the smaller's wrist, preventing him from moving at more. "Sehan…please."

"No." He jerked his hands away from the other. "No Jongsoo…I'm done. Have fun with your and s and whatever you are going to do."

"Sehan, just please wait." Jongsoo once again grabbed Sehan's wrist and pulled him back in the seat. "Just wait…"

"Wait for what?" The smaller said with anger in his voice.

"Just…okay…okay we won't get back together. Bu-but what about being friends again?"

"Friends?" He shook his head. "I don't know Jongsoo…I just don't know."

It was silent between them; the waiter that was watching over the diner wanted to go and ask if everything was okay, but didn't want to interrupt a conversation.

"I'm sorry…Sehan…I'm just sorry for the things that I did."

Sehan could only shrug. "I can't  tell the future…who would have known that something like this would happen?"

"Hm…s-so…this is it then?"

"I think so."

Jongsoo bit his lips before answering. "Well then…I…I-I wish you the best then."

"Hm." Sehan stood up from his seat. "You too." Before he was about to leave, Jongsoo grabbed his wrist.

"T-tell Minjun…that…um, that he got himself a good…b-boyfriend." Instead of responding back, Sehan nodded. "I mean…I knew that…you were the greatest person to have as a boyfriend…I just ending up ing up the whole thing.'

Sehan let out a soft chuckle. "You sure did...and if you knew that I was such a catch...why do all those things." He tugged his hand away. "Have a good night Jongsoo…and go home."

Jongsoo slowly nodded as he watched Sehan exited the diner.

'This is probably the last time I'll ever see him again. Baekyeol already said that he would be leaving the country to study in Europe...while...I'm here.'

"Sir." The graduate looked up at the waiter. "Would you like anything?"

Jongsoo hesitated a bit before answering. "Y-yes."

"What would you like?" The waiter clicked his pen, waiting for the other to respond.

Soon tears started to roll from his eyes.

"To restart everything from the beginning…I-I want to have my boyfriend back."

--- (JONGSOO) --- (JSSH) --- (SEHAN) ---

comment if you like/mistakes = im sorry!!

*Names are just from a random generator.