Chapter 30: REWIND 5 <<<<< [--:--am]

Six years later…

“Byunghee?” his mother called, her voice deceptively sweet and her intentions sounding falsely motherly. “Where are you going?”

“Just out,” Byunghee replied evasively. “To meet a few acquaintances.”

She frowned but said nothing.

“It’s nothing umma,” he forced a smile. “It’s just something I need to do…before I set plans in motion.”

Her face lit up with a bright smile at his words. Byunghee winced internally at the lie, hoping she would never find out who exactly he was meeting.

“Alright then,” she bade him goodbye. “Will you be home for dinner?”

Byunghee looked down at his shoes. “No umma,” he said slowly. “I don’t think so.”

***

“I’m leaving Changsun,” Ji-su stared down at her little brother. Over one shoulder was a small sling bag, filled with her meager possessions.

“Y-you…what?!” Changsun spluttered. “You’re leaving?!”

Ji-su smiled sadly. “You had to see this coming little brother,” she said softly. “I’m joining the enforcers.”

“What?!” Changsun’s eyes widened. “B-but after the purge, after umma’s death…and you would join them?!”

Ji-su simply nodded.

“Why?” was all Changsun could say. He hated the forlornness in his voice, the whiny tone at the thought of his sister – the last real person he could call family – leaving him behind.

Ji-su bit her lip. “Because the system needs to change. The government needs to change. Our world needs to break free of the system it’s embroiled itself in, and what better way to do it than from the inside out.”

“Noona!” Changsun’s cry was a plead.

“I’m going to become an enforcer. And then I’m going to change their way of thinking. I’m going to improve everyone’s lives, one step at a time.”

That’s wishful thinking, was what a small part of Changsun wanted to say but he didn’t because of the belief that shone in Ji-su’s eyes. She truly believed she could change things.

“But…you’re going to leave me alone? With father?” Without meaning to, Changsun turned around and stared angrily at his father who was sitting in a rocking chair with his back to his son. He barely noticed their heated discussion, so wrapped up in his own world, rocking back and forth and mumbling profanities and promises.

Ji-su knelt and pulled her little brother into a hug, bringing him back to her decision and away from the father they both tried to pretend hadn’t changed for the worse. “Changsun,” she whispered. “You’re not a child anymore. You’re big and you’re strong and you need to make choices in life. I can’t watch over you forever.”

“But…” he whispered thickly. “But…you don’t have to go!”

“But I do,” she said. “I’m dreaming of a bigger world, a better world. And dreams don’t come into realization from just dreaming about them. I’m sorry Changsun, but for you, for us, I’m doing this.”

“Don’t lie,” Changsun pulled away from her roughly. “Don’t say it’s for me. Don’t justify your desires like that.”

He tried not to look at her wounded expression. “I’m sorry little brother, I won’t.”

Ji-su stood up. “But I’m still doing this,” she said. She had already said goodbyes to their father; not that he had registered any of it. The real heartbreak was leaving her little brother. “So goodbye little brother. I’ll visit when I can.” And then she was gone.

***

It had been four years since they had seen each other properly. The purge had wrought damage on more than just the city; their families, their relationships, everything had changed.

Byunghee stared over the harbor at the chugging ships and the spill of grey smoke.  In his hand he held two small flowers. They had been hard to procure, but he thought the gesture would make them smile, wherever their souls were in this twisted world.

“Pretty,” commented a sober voice from behind him. Byunghee turned to see Changsun trudge across the grass, hands dug deeply into pockets. “Who are they for?”

“My sisters,” Byunghee replied and threw the flowers into the harbor where they floated away. “It’s been four years.”

“Who would’ve thought it would pass that fast,” Changsun said with a wry grimace. “It’s been a while Byunghee. How have you been?”

“I know Changsun,” Byunghee replied tiredly. He had dark circles under his eyes. “Home’s been tough and lately there’s not enough food to go around.”

Changsun made a murmur of agreement. “My sister joined the enforcers the other day,” he confessed. Something about being with Byunghee made him want to share everything, to spill all the dark and painful burdens that accosted his heart. It was just like old times.

But Byunghee’s reaction was the exact opposite of Changsun’s demeanour. “What?!” Byunghee roughly grabbed Changsun’s shoulders. “But you know what they do to them! The rumours! Whoever joins the enforcers never come back!”

“I know,” Changsun growled, prying off the fingers. “But…but…it was her choice. It’s been tough…ever since the purge-“ he stopped there, thinking unwillingly of his father and his addiction.

“I get it brother,” Byunghee held up one hand. “You don’t need to tell me. We’re all going through the same thing.”

“Thank you,” Changsun let out a sigh. “Putting it in words is like... admitting this nightmare is happening…”

“I get it. I’m the same,” Byunghee leaned against Changsun’s shoulder. “Promise me one thing brother.”

“Anything.”

“Promise that no matter what, we’ll have each other backs,” Byunghee whispered.

Changsun let out a small laugh and rested his head on top of Byunghee’s. “Pabo,” he said jokingly. “You don’t need to ask. It’s a given.”

They shared a silence for a moment, each wondering if they should say their darkest secrets. For Byunghee it was his mother and her insanity that seem to plague her ever since the day his sisters had died. That and the choices he was making for her, choices that were scaring him. For Changsun it was his father and the way he never seemed to notice his two children any more. That and the choices his sister had made, leaving him behind and trying to erect a better future despite the hopeless odds against her.

It was Byunghee who spoke first.  “Hey, Changsun,” he said slowly, eyes tracking Changsun. “I have something to tell you.”

 “You’ve decided then,” Changsun stared at him with sorrowful eyes. He knew what this was about. He’d heard the rumours, of the gangs, of their bloodthirsty desire for revenge, and of Byunghee’s desire to join them.

Byunghee nodded. “I have.”

“You’re going to join the pirates.” It wasn’t a question. It was a fact.

Byunghee gave a curt nod.

“Why?” Changsun leaned forwards, his eyes shiny with unshed tears. “You know what messing with the pirates causes.”

Byunghee chewed his bottom lip. “I just…have to…”

“Byunghee!”

“I can’t tell you!” Byunghee shouted. “I want to tell you…but it’s not something that involves you!”

Changsun took a step backwards, his eyes wide with shock. “It doesn’t involve me? Your brother?”

“Not by blood,” Byunghee said coldly.

“Isn’t bonds good enough? Didn’t we promise to share everything? The good times, the bad, the terrible…”

“Please understand Changsun,” Byunghee shook his head. “You’re my brother and you’re the closest thing I have left, but family comes first. And this is one family mess I don’t want you to get involved in.”
Changsun looked at his brother and let one tear slip out and run down his cheek. In the moonlight, it was cast silver and his black hair grey. There was a long stretch of silence and then Joon finally spoke, his voice hoarse. “Which gang did you join?”

Byunghee raised his head and stared at the moon. “The BlackBeards.”

Changsun froze. “Are you sure? They have a reputation for being the least moralistic-“

“They offered me the chance. I couldn’t say no.”

Changsun’s head lowered. He knew Byunghee’s stubbornness like the back of his hand. Badgering him any  further would result in nothing. “I get it brother, just…be careful okay?”

Byunghee shot him a grateful look. “I will. I promise. I won’t do anything bad. I can’t fail. It’s my…duty…”

Changsun frowned at that word. It was so reminiscent of Ji-su off on her duty. “Are you sure I can’t convince you out of this?”

Byunghee smiled at Changsun’s concern. “Certain. I have to do this.”

“I don’t like it,” Changsun muttered stubbornly.

“It’s nothing too dangerous. I have an initiation task, some easy transportation of goods. And once I’m in…I’ll have the chance to change everything. The government, the people…” a strange gleam came into his eyes, one that Changsun disliked immediately.

“Is this really what you want?” he probed. The Byunghee he used to know was never one for change. He accepted that this world had its miseries and that you had to work your way around them. He was never one to instigate change.

But this Byunghee’s eyes flashed. “It is,” he growled.

“Okay…” Changsun raised his hands in surrender. “I’m not trying to antagonize you brother…I’m just worried about you.”

Byunghee’s shoulders drop. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m just a little on edge.”

“I got that.”

“It’s just…I really need this.”

“I got it…” Changsun said softly. “But I still don’t like it. Not one bit.”

And if Byunghee wasn’t going to tell him the truth, then Lee Changsun was going to get to the bottom of it himself.

Like the brother he was meant to be.