Changmin walks to his dorm room slowly.

What is my problem? Am I that scared of my parents that I've become a jerk? Joon didn't do anything wrong...ugh you changmin you can't do anything right.

He finally reaches his dorm room and puts his hand into his pocket for the keys, but he couldn't find them.

Oh no! God please no!

He puts his hand over his mouth wanting to die rather then go back there. they must have dropped out of his pocket in joon's room. he hits his head against his door. Then pulls himself up and walks back down the hallway to joons dorm. He stands in front of it, just looking at it. He reaches up his hand and wipes all of the tears from his eyes, taking a deep breath. Then he brings up a fist and knocks slowly.

"WHO IS IT?!" Came Joon's angry voice.

"It's.....it's changmin." He said quietly.

Oh I can't do this!

He starts to leave just as the door opens. "what do you want?" Joon asks.

"...I uh...forgot my keys..." Min looks at his hands.

Joon hold the door open and Min walks past quickly, averting his eyes from Joon. He walks over to the bed and runs his hands over the sheets looking for his keys moving pillows every which way.

Finally he sees the keys and grabs them, standing up. he looks at Joon and then quickly away again. " t-thanks..."

He walks to the door, but stops. his heart aching inside him not letting him leave. he slowly turns around.

He swallows. "Joon I..."

"You what?" he says softly.

"I..." changmin swallows again. "I...I was wrong...I didn't..I didn't mean what I said...I....I was just mad and confused and..." Min looks up at him. "you don't have to forgive me..." Then he looks back down at his hands clasped in front of him. "I can just stay away from you if that's what you want...it's probably best...I'm not good around people...I hurt them without trying"

Changmin blinks away tears. "...but.....I'm....I'm sorry..really sorry." his voice dies and he doesn't meet his eyes.

Suddenly he feels arms around him, pulling him into a hug.

"its fine. Just don't do that to me okay? It's scary." Joon says.

Changmin nods, tears choking him. he hugs back and starts sobbing despite himself.

This is the first person that's ever forgiven me like this. how can he be so kind to me? ......UGH, you Changmin! Why are you crying? You need to stop.

Joon holds him at arms length, wiping the tears from Changmin's face. "oh come on now." he playfully punches Min's cheek. "if you keep crying this much we might have to use you to water our lawn during droughts! There's no reason to cry minnie." Joon holds him in his arms for a few seconds longer before letting go. He gives off a smile.

Changmin takes in a final shuttering breath trying to calm himself, he brings his hand up to his face trying to hide his red eyes, wiping them with his sleeve. Then he looks over at joon and electricity shot through his heart.

Oh my God! Why am I feeling this? Do I...like him? 

Joon sits back on his bed. "do you feel better?"

Min nods not trusting his voice.

Joon smiles warmly. "good!" Changmin thought his heart was going to burst when he smiled. He looks away and swallows hard.

Why am I acting like this? It's like everything he does makes me feel...different. Am I falling for him?

Joon looks over at changmin. "What's wrong?"

"N-nothing!" Changmin looks at joon and then down at the ground.

Calm down Min. You're not falling for him...you can't fall for him. Just stay calm.

Joon nods slowly. "okay..Then."

Changmin smiles over at him. "So...what now?"

Joon shrugs then looks at the clock on the wall. "We're stuck in here for the night. The teachers are out now watching the hallway."

Min nods scratching his cheek, then he stands up. "Then I'll just-..." he starts walking over to the chair in the corner.

"You'll just... Go to sleep on the chair?" Joon laughs. "You should at least do your homework first."

‎Changmin's eyes go wide. "oh goodness I forgot!" he rushes over to his bag falling to his knees and pulls out the crumpled papers frantically. ‎he flattens the papers on the ground eyes quickly moving over the homework marking down answers.

Joon laughs, laying back on the bed. "You're something else."

"I'll try to take that as a complement." Changmin smiles to himself still working.

Joon laughs again and shuts his eyes humming to himself softly.

After a bit ‎Changmin finishes his work and smiles down at it. "This will just have to do..." He looks over at joon and walks toward him, leaning over him smiling. 

Joon continues to hum, not opening his eyes.

Then without thinking changmin leans down further and kisses Joon lightly on the lips.

Joon's eyes open widely in surprise. "YAH!! Changmin!" Starts blushing.

Min jumps back eyes flying open. "I-..I-..." He stutters touching his lips, going red.

WHY DID I JUST-?! OH GOD!! WHAT DID I-..?!?! WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?! THAT WAS STUPID. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY I WOULD DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT! DO I LIKE HIM?!

Joon shuffles to his feet his mouth agape. "why did you.."

"I-..I-..I don't know!" his hands start shaking still touching his lips.

PLEASE DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT! I'M SORRY! I DON'T KNOW WHAT CAME OVER ME!

Changmin looks at Joon his heart racing. "I-...I-..." He runs for the door.

"Stop!!! You can't leave. Plus. You shouldn't be ashamed..I liked it."

Changmin spins around slowly, his closed hand still over his lips trying to control his breathing. his heart was beating so hard in his chest he was sure joon could hear it. he just wanted to run away, he didn't know what he was thinking and even worse he didn't know what he was feeling. part of him wanted to run over and kiss joon again and that scared him. so he just stood there breathing hard emotions drowning him.

Joon shuts his eyes and sits back down on the bed. "Just relax. Everything is okay.."

"Is it!" Min says quickly, terror rising in his voice. "is it okay?" He chokes fear killing him.

"Of course it is. If its that bad to kiss me, no one will have to know."

Min tries to control breathing and looks over at joon."....it....it wasn't bad." he looks away turning red again.

Did I really just say that out loud?! I mean...I was thinking it but...

Joon smiles. "I'm sorry that you liked it then."

Changmin smiles despite himself and lets out a quick breath that some could say was a laugh. he looks at the wall trying to avoid joon's gaze. Then after a few seconds he looks back at Joon who was staring down at his hands. Suddenly a wash of emotions start fighting for his attention. he looks down at his hands again.

I really do like him don't I? 

He bites his lip, then walks over to Joon. Joon's eyes were shut now, and Min looked at him, hesitating.

Foolish min, this is foolish! Your parents would kill you if they knew!

Min swallows and forces the thoughts down. then he slowly he leans forward, kissing joon on the cheek slowly.

Joon's eyes open and he turns to face Min, starting to blush. "Hey there..." a playful smile creeps upon Joon's face. 

Changmin blushes a deep red and pulls away slightly looking down shyly.

"What's wrong?" Joon asks.

Min looks up at him, there eyes meeting."..nothing's wrong." Min hesitates then leans forward again kissing Joon's forehead softly.

 "Min..." Joon says slowly. "Do you want to be..with me?"

Changmin's lips part slightly as he pulls back from the kiss. "..I-.." He looks down slowly his breath catching in his throat.

Oh...what I would give to say yes. God why was this so complicated?! If he'd been a girl I wouldn't hesitate at all. I'd be more then happy to date someone like him!.......then.......what's stopping me?....my parents? They can't run my life forever can they? and....and is pleasing them more important then being happy? Would dating Joon make me happy?

Min looks into joon's eyes."...joon....I..."

Joon would make me happy...he really would. He was worth the risk.

Min looks at his hands then, slowly, he looks up and whispers."....yes."