It's nights like these I'm glad he's by my side. It's nights like these I'm glad he can turn over to me and hold me tightly as the tears rush down his face. Tonight is one of the nights that I'm truly glad that he hasn't left me for the future. 

"Shhh." I tell him "It's ok I'm here." 

He doesn't say anything but he doesn't have to. The sounds that he makes that sound somewhere between soft screams and whimpers are enough. I hold him tightly and don't let go until he pushes back. But he never does. 

"Don't leave me Jungkook." He says after he's subdued a bit. 

"I would never." 

He holds me close and wraps his fingers into mine. I hold him as close to my chest as possible hoping that the sound of my heartbeat will lull him to sleep long enough that he can get at least a few hours. 

As for me I haven't slept since we were discharged from the hospital. It's not that I'm afraid of the nightmares, those I could handle. It's that I'm afraid of losing him one night. Even though I know that he hasn't left me in over a week I can't take a chance. I have to keep him close to me and make sure that he never leaves. 

"I don't want to leave. I want to stay here with you forever. I don't care what happens I just don't want to leave your arms." The last sentence is whimpered out and I feel throat tighten. 

"Don't let me go back..." He says and I hear the tears in his voice "Please." 

"I'm not letting go of you Tae." I say and hold him tightly until he falls asleep in my arms. 

Slowly things begin to return to normal. He remembers more and more and eventually he's back in school and in every class with me. I never leave his side for fear of him leaving, even in classes we don't have together I stay with him. Eventually our teachers get used to it. 

But it's not until one night that I remember what started this whole thing in the first place. 

It's my turn to wake up screaming loudly and  clinging on to him for dear life. At first I'm too freaked out to remember that he's really there and I haven't lost him to the future. 

"Kookie what is it?" 

"It's that dream again. The one where you just left me in a cloud of ashes." 

He holds me tightly and I realize just why he does this even on nights without his nightmares. It's incredibly calming and immediately makes me feel protected. I lay against his chest and listen to his heartbeat. 

"It's ok I'm here Jungkook." 

"Don't let go of me please." 

"I promise that I won't." 

I eventually fall back asleep against him and let his heartbeat be the thing that keeps the nightmares away from me. 

I wake up and slowly open my eyes. It takes me a minute to be fully aware that Taehyung is no longer next to me. I sit up quickly and look under the covers. Nothing. 

"Tae?" I yell out hoping for an answer. "Tae!" 

I run downstairs and through the house searching for him. He couldn't have left me last night. He promised he would stay. I tear throughout the house and even down the street a bit. 

I walk back in and slump into the couch in tears, my throat sore from screaming his name out. He actually left me again. He promised that he wouldn't leave me and I promised him he would never have to go back. We both were wrong. 

"Kookie what happened?" 

He stands in the doorway with a bag of groceries looking completel dumbfounded and concerned. 

"Where the hell did you go?" i said standing up in anger. 

"To the store to get food for breakfast. Are you ok?" 

I hit his arm "I thought you left me. Why didn't you leave a note?" 

"I didn't think I would be gone so long. I'm sorry baby." He sets the groceries down on the counter and hugs me tightly. 

"I brought you some flowers" He says and I chuckle a bit. 

He pulls them out and they're yellow roses with purple ribbon. 

"They're beautiful." I say and he kisses me gently. 

"glad you like them. Now come help me make breakfast before we get too carried away."