Wow. It's been months. What the hell, I didn't plan to take this long to update. T__T

But life happens and life is the priority, so that's that. I'll be grateful if my dear readers still remembers this series lol.

Anyway, a most happy birthday to my sunshine child, iKONICs' president and iKON's ball of love, Donghyuk. As with the past 2 years, here is my birthday offering for him. The format is a bit different this time, but I hope everyone can enjoy reading this as well ^^.

Happy New Year to everyone!

(There's errors as usual, but please excuse them as always. ^^;;)

*Note: the sectional drabbles occur in a chronological order within a day, except #7

1.

The airconditioning wasn’t working well throughout the night and his head was filled with echoes of the previous day’s conversations, but Donghyuk still managed to get up on time. Jaeho manager had his eye on him by the door, as if making sure he’ll really get out of bed now, so he fakes an irritated sigh and sits up still cocooned in his blanket.

The cracks of dawn are evident from the living room windows. Donghyuk takes a moment to admire Seoul's morning skyline before getting interrupted with an intentional sleepy slurring of his name. Bobby sits on his usual chair at the dining table, cheeks pressed on the cold wood as he gives Donghyuk a glassy stare. Donghyuk already knew what the rapper wanted from him before Bobby even said it.

“Make me breakfast, Dong.”

Donghyuk's tempted to refuse, to retort about saving time and make breakfast only for himself.

But Bobby adds the magic word(s).

“Please. Hyung needs you.”

Donghyuk sighs.

He asks his hyung if he wants ramen or toasted bread with jam. Of course Bobby mumbles “both” like the pest and glutton that he is.

He grabs the bread bag at the counter and opens the cupboard to scan their ramen stash. Not much choices left. Maybe he can just cook everything together?

He turns around to ask his rapper hyung, but it seems he fell asleep. Shaking his head fondly, Donghyuk decides to spare the hyung and his other two housemates from experimental ramen.

2.

Donghyuk's the last one to shower this time. Thankfully there's still ample time to take his time choosing his airport fashion, though it's not like he didn't have a planned outfit already.

Junhwe is standing in the middle of his room, still wearing his standard sweatpants and white tee. A towel hangs around his neck to catch falling water drops from his still wet hair. His fellow 97-liner has his arms crossed, eyes concentrated on Donghyuk's widely opened closet.

“Your closet's in your room.”

“Yeah, but you have more clothes.”

Junhwe's borrowing his stuff again, huh.

Donghyuk goes straight to the closet to take out his planned outfit. Junhwe's attention turns to Donghyuk as he watches him place the jeans, shirt and jacket on his bed. They locked eyes for a moment, which Junhwe immediately breaks by averting his eyes sideways as if he'd been caught doing something he shouldn't. At that point, Donghyuk already knew Junhwe wants his help too rather than just letting him choose by himself.

Shaking his head, Donghyuk quickly wears his home tee and shorts before standing beside Junhwe, gesturing him to look at his closet again. He grabs the towel around Junhwe's neck and starts carefully wiping it over the other's dripping hair strands.

“How about you tell me first if you feel like layering clothes today or not?” he asks and Junhwe answers by saying he doesn’t really know. Donghyuk only gives out a long-suffering sigh.

Suffice to say, Donghyuk ends up spending his extra time on Junhwe. His chingu steps out of the dorm as very well-dressed, surely to generate a lot more camera clicks from fansites and the media at the airport. Donghyuk steps out wearing his usual sweater jacket, only because he gave his planned one for Junhwe to wear.

There wasn't a word of thanks from Koo Junhwe, but his fellow vocalist did give him two pieces of those free candies from the airport lounge.

At least they're coffee-flavored.

3.

Yunhyeong is his assigned plane seatmate today, which can be good or bad depending on how much Yunhyeong decides to take not-so-secret photos of him.

However, Yunhyeong is uncharacteristically not taking selcas. Instead, he has a small book opened. “Know the Japanese humor!” is emblazoned on the cover in bolded Hiragana characters. It's an odd picture to see Yunhyeong reading something like it, until Donghyuk remembers last week.

“You didn't have to go out of your way to buy and read a book like that, hyung.” He whispers as he leans closer. A stewardess walks by to offer warm towel, but Donghyuk politely refuses.

Yunhyeong shakes his head. “What are you talking about Donghyuk-ah? This is the least I can do.”

Last week, Yunhyeong was given a “friendly scolding” by sajangnim after he stuttered through three jokes in a Japanese concert and not getting any audience reactions for all three. The hyung was quick to show everyone he didn’t take the scolding to heart and promised he’d do better next time. Donghyuk didn’t realize the scolding’s enough to push the buttons for Yunhyeong’s self esteem.

When their in-flight meal arrives, Yunhyeong held the book with one hand while he eats spoonfuls at a time from the other. He mumbles phrases in between swallowing food, and Donghyuk watches him from the corner of his eye in both amusement and awe of his hyung’s passion.

And like the affectionate dongsaeng that he loves to be, Donghyuk assists Yunhyeong by offering to feed him his own food so he can just concentrate on the book. It’s cheesily embarrassing but he’ll do it for Yunhyeong. Besides, Song Yunhyeong is the only one who’d tolerate it anyway. Yunhyeong noticeably has a more cheery hint in his voice as he practices the Japanese joke phrases after that.

That doesn’t stop the secret photo-taking when Donghyuk took a nap though.

4.

It’s the 5th time Jinhwan’s been stopped in the recording booth by Hanbin. Usually, it doesn’t take that fast for Hanbin to stop recording due to mistakes, but Hanbin is in a really bad mood today.

There’s that calamitous slap on the desk by a hand, a sign of growing anger and frustration from their leader. Their Japanese translator slinks back towards the wall and all manner of noise is suddenly halted.

“Step out for a bit, hyung. You’re totally out of it.”

Calm and very firm, Hanbin had spoken. No room for “no” or any pleading to try one more time.

Chanwoo is called to record his part for now, a rather calculative choice by Hanbin since Chanwoo is the maknae and therefore an easier target to let out some steam. Donghyuk saw Jinhwan mouth a “sorry” not to Hanbin but to Chanwoo before getting out of the room. Junhwe cracks an ill-timed joke, only spared by Bobby’s generous yet awkward laugh. There’s an unsaid order in the air not to follow Jinhwan out, but Donghyuk still risks it. He’d done with his part anyway being the first to record his usual falsetto lines.

It doesn’t take long for him to find where Jinhwan is. Opening the door to the meeting room nearest to the hallway vending machine, Donghyuk offers a smile towards the mat-hyung who’s nursing a can of warm barley tea.

“Hi hyung.”

Jinhwan snickers at him. “What a busy-body.”

“...Should I go back?”

“You should.”

But Donghyuk doesn’t want to, so he closes the door and sits beside Jinhwan. Jinhwan sighs and sips from his can.

It’s silent yet Donghyuk doesn’t start a conversation. He always knew Jinhwan prefers pondering over his emotions and problems by himself, and all Donghyuk wants is to provide company. Jinhwan seems contented with that too and continues sipping in small intervals, his eyes unmoving towards the clean whiteboard across them.

That’s why it’s quite a shock when Jinhwan suddenly tears up, sobs two times, and starts speaking.

It was a rant, of course. Kim Hanbin shouldn’t be taking his bad mood on them. Kim Hanbin should learn to be more patient. He should learn to be more patient. He put the maknae in a tight spot once again due to his mistake. He should have improved his singing more by now and yet, why can’t he please their leader?

Donghyuk still doesn’t answer. It’s quite obvious his hyung doesn’t need words of comfort and only needs to let out his own frustrations. What he can do, however, is to sing a song.

It’s odd and might also be out of place, but somehow Donghyuk knows it’s what needed instead of blatant words. A song about love with a soothing melody. Almost a lullaby. A reminder of the thing that brought them all together in the first place.

Jinhwan gives him a confused look with a hint of offense in his eyes, but Donghyuk continued singing. He gives Jinhwan his full attention, silently inviting him to sing too, and it doesn’t take long. Jinhwan relaxes beside him and sings. By the time they finished singing the song, the tensed lines on the hyung’s face is gone. He nods to Donghyuk as if to say he understands.

Donghyuk smiles widely. Jinhwan slings an arm around his shoulder, squeezing him for a moment, before gently pulling him to stand up.

“Let’s go back.”

When they entered the recording studio, they’re greeted by a much relaxed leader, offering a silent apology through a shy smile. Jinhwan smiles back, jokes about him and Donghyuk dating now, and immediately lifts everyone’s mood.

Along with the other members, Donghyuk laughs in relief.

5.

The late lunch they called a delivery for hasn’t arrived yet and they’re all too hungry to wait more. Jaeho manager said they can go get lunch on their own now, never mind the late food delivery, but everyone can’t go out at the same time. Bobby immediately volunteered to stay back. “I’m not that hungry yet” he said, but they all knew the rapper just wants to use the waiting time to take a nap. Hanbin follows that by saying he’ll stay back too since he needs to decide soon on the setlist and the more complicated arrangements for their upcoming special Japanese concert.

“Just don’t eat too much because we’re going straight to choreography practice soon.” Hanbin reminds, earning playful grunts of complaint.

Donghyuk follows the others out but the fact that Hanbin’s left behind doesn’t quite sit well with him. Deciding on their stage transitions has started to become an unofficial task of Donghyuk ever since he did some of the choreos of their Continue tour, and with Hanbin being left by himself to do the remaining decisions for the setlist, he’d need someone to help him decide better. Donghyuk knows he can do that role.

“I think I’ll just go back there.” he announces as he, Yunhyeong, Chanwoo, Junhwe and Jinhwan walk further from the rehearsal hall. He grins sheepishly as s look at him. “Help out more, you know? And keep Bobby-hyung from sleeping too much.”

The others didn’t stop him by any means, even teasing him about being such a goody-two-shoes. Jinhwan slipped him a grateful look though, patting his back affectionately before ushering the dongsaengs out.

Hanbin raised an eyebrow at him as soon as he went back in the rehearsal hall. Bobby’s already sound asleep at the sofa by the drinking station, so Donghyuk ignores him and goes straight to his leader.

“Maybe you need some help with the stage transitions.” he smiles as he dances playfully to lighten up his hyung’s mood. Hanbin copies his stupid dance, showing his childish side as they both laugh at their antics.

“You don’t have to but I’ll accept your help.” he says as he wraps an arm around Donghyuk’s waist to lead him to where he decided to work on the setlist. Pieces of paper are scattered at the edge of the rehearsal hall’s laminated floor. “I knew I can always count on you.”

Donghyuk grins again, takes a pen from the pen holder beside the papers, and sits at the side.

“Of course, hyung. I’ll do whatever you need me to do.”

Hanbin cringes playfully at his sweet but admittedly cheesy statement before thanking him.

In a of luck, the expected lunch delivery arrives just about 3 minutes after that. They woke up Bobby so the three of them can eat lunch together as Donghyuk and Hanbin go through their song choices at the same time. Bobby offered to help too but Hanbin told him instead to avoid having too many mistakes at the choreography practice later, making Donghyuk laugh loudly and earning himself a smack on the head.

Donghyuk offers his opinions honestly, even clashing with Hanbin’s when he felt there’s a better choice. Hanbin listens to him attentively and even if such reliance and trust still feels awkward sometimes, Donghyuk is truly grateful and proud he’s come this far to be acknowledged by his leader.

They did finish up a whole setlist with a rough draft of their planned transitions, just by the two of them. The other four iKON members were quite late getting back but Hanbin didn’t scold them. Clearly, his mood had gotten even better.

“Donghyukie, can you explain our setlist?” Hanbin asks when everyone’s ready to go back to work. It surprised Donghyuk but it’s an honor to do the task, so he made sure he explained and demonstrated the transitions well.

Everyone complimented his and Hanbin’s work, showing obvious excitement in their faces. Hanbin’s proud smile to him is the cherry on top.

6.

Even with the smooth setlist and transitions arrangement, encountering hiccups during their choreography practice can’t be avoided. Chanwoo committed the bulk of the mistakes this time.

No one can really blame him too much, though. Not even Hanbin. It’s a completely new choreography. Done after some adjustments just a few days ago after Donghyuk and Hanbin learned it initially through the video sent by Kinjaz. iKON’s going to unveil it along with the new Japanese song they recorded in finality earlier in the day. Sajangnim has high expectations for the song and dance, even marketing it through YGEX as an exclusive special gift for the loyal Japanese fans who stood by them through thick and thin.

A member is bound to be caught in the pressure. It just happens that it’s Chanwoo, allowing him to make so many mistakes when he usually catches on fast.

No volunteering for Donghyuk now. He knew right away he needed to stay back to help Chanwoo. It’s his responsibility as the team’s dance-focused member, and Hanbin gave him strength by patting his head in a brotherly gesture. Dinner rolls in, they all ate together, and then the members left Donghyuk and Chanwoo alone.

“So,” Donghyuk takes a deep breath and nods encouragingly at the maknae. “Let’s start.”

Chanwoo has an uncharacteristic panic in his eyes as he silently goes into position.

The extra, one-on-one practice still didn’t go smoothly. Donghyuk did his best to be patient, swallowing in spikes of frustration and quickly reminding himself not to shout. There’s a time for that kind of discipline and it certainly won’t help Chanwoo’s mindset right now. Donghyuk knew it best after all. How many times did he have his own confidence and self-esteem shattered to pieces? He knows how to handle himself better now but Chanwoo, though always determined, is still learning.

It’s past midnight when they’re finally done. They sat by the benches, backs pressed on the cold walls as they monitored their recorded dance for the final time. Hanbin’s going to watch it later and they need to make it as perfect as they can. When they song ends and no errors are seen, they simultaneously sigh in relief.

“Finally.” Donghyuk allows himself to laugh. He pats Chanwoo’s head, similar to how Hanbin did before dinner. “You did well, Chanu-ya.”

Chanwoo hides a sob and laughs too. “Thanks Donghyuk-ah. Thank you for always helping me.”

Donghyuk replies “No problem” in a sing-song manner, then calls up Jaeho-manager to inform him that they’re done.

When Jaeho finally arrives, Chanwoo had already fallen asleep. The maknae had evidently expended much more energy than Donghyuk and didn’t even wake up despite the noise from their manager’s footsteps.

“Chanu~” Donghyuk gently pats Chanwoo’s cheek to wake him, snickering when the maknae blinks and sleepily lifts his head from Donghyuk’s shoulder. Donghyuk can feel the soreness of shoulders now but he doesn’t pay heed to it.

Jaeho-manager helps Chanwoo up. Donghyuk giggles softly when Chanwoo mumbles a rather drunk-sounding “Thank you”, as if he hadn’t said it enough.

He pats Chanwoo’s head again. “Time to go now.”

A job well done to Chanwoo. To both of them. Now it’s time to rest for the next day.

7.

Donghyuk collapses on the bed as soon as he enters his hotel room for the past 3 days. The concert was a big success. They had a full house, everyone was on high spirits, sajangnim was there too and said they did well. The boss even treated them to a steak dinner and everyone made sure they had their fill.

Now, the after concert side-effect comes.

He hears the disembodied echoes of his beloved fans - the screams for him and for s, not leaving him even though he’s all alone in his room and it’s silent. Unlike the other times however, Donghyuk welcomes it, embraces it like a remedy instead of the curse that it can be.

Anything to distract himself. To pull himself together before making the expected call.

First his sister, then his mother. Both their calls are short, most probably because his family knows he’s tired from the concert. It was enough to dispel a part of his sadness and he’s thankful his mom and sis are always there to remind him that he’s loved and they’re proud.

That his dad is proud too. Exactly this day, his father left them for Heaven and Donghyuk still misses him dearly.

“Bros coming through!”

Suddenly, the door burst open and in came s in a single file. Donghyuk sits up in shock, eyes wide as he watches them take their own place in his room. Junhwe goes straight to his bed, sprawling himself on the sheets as much as he can without pushing him off. Jinhwan kicks Junhwe out however, only to lay down there himself and flirtily invite Donghyuk to lay beside him. Yunhyeong scolds Donghyuk for the messy organisation of his shoes, while Bobby places a box of pizza on the desk and tells Chanwoo to distribute the Asahi cans now. Hanbin opens the TV and did a celebratory dance when a replay of Kimi No Na Wa greets them on the screen.

“W-What…” Donghyuk still hasn’t fully recovered. “What’s going on?”

“A sleepover.” Junhwe answers as if it explains everything. He sits on the side of the bed, by the floor, and rests an arm on Donghyuk’s knees. “No complaining.”

Hanbin shushes their power vocal when the intro of the movie’s done. Everyone proceeds to focus on the beloved movie they already watched a dozen times. All except the owner of the room they invaded.

It takes more moments for Donghyuk to finally realize. So they remembered too. They didn’t have to, but they did. And they knew. They knew he still goes through the pain of his loss.

And they’re here for him. Will always be here for him.

“I love you guys.” he says out loud with a wide grin, not caring that there are tears dangling in his eyes.

Everyone averts their attention to him then. Bobby gives him the bro hand sign while chewing pizza, Yunhyeong fetches him a sweater because it’s cold, Chanwoo gives him two snacks, and Hanbin copies Bobby but with both hands. Junhwe gives him a not-so-welcomed pinch on his thigh, while Jinhwan gives him a most-welcomed back hug.

Of course, Donghyuk doesn’t need words to be assured, as s’ actions speak louder. It echoes throughout his room, powerful and clear enough to drown out not only the after-concert voices but also the loneliness of loss.

We’re here.

We love you.

.

.

.

Real life moments the drabbles are inspired by:

1. Dong's Real Life Vlive. Remember Bobby forcing Dong to grill meat for breakfast? Yeah, that one.

2. Random moments of Donghyuk being June's unofficial stylist (e.g. fixing his hair, fixing his socks, sharing clothes...)

3. Yunhyeong and his knack of taking photos of Dong's sleeping face - as revealed in Videostar. Please correct me if I'm wrong. not that it matters now

4. It was revealed by the members that Jinhwan once cried to Donghyuk while they were drinking. (in that Vlive promotional series, the name of which escapes me and I'm too lazy to check.)

5. Hanbin entrusting Donghyuk with dance-related duties. Also thanking him in their Idol Radio guesting for it T^T

6. Chanwoo has always said he's grateful to Donghyuk for helping him. The maknaes are adorable ♥

7. Yunhyeong said during iKON TV that Dong might be sad whenever their concert's done and their families go backstage. You all know why...

Also, I'm OK is about to be released in a few days! So excited! Let's support them as much as we can!