A/N: First of all, I'm sorry. 

I suggest you read this chapter while listening to HYYH series a.k.a. I Need U + Run. Mainly I Need U though.

I promise it will get better.

tw: selfharm, suicide attempt

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Jimin sighed as he entered his room as he finished another dinner with his family. Another dinner means another lecture, which he probably already memorized it by now. It’s been such a habit that each dinner his parents decided to point out his flaws, and not to mention Minhyuk was home today, adding the tension between them more. He tried so much to be par on their level but everything just seems useless.

“Oppa,” a familiar voice came in, “It’s Junghwa,”

“Just come in, Jung-ie,”

His door was opened slightly and revealed a flock of raven-colored hair sticking out. Her eyes was showing concer on her, “Are you okay, oppa?”

If there’s one thing Jimin could be thankful for his life, it’s Junghwa. Even though he didn’t say anything, she always knew what’s wrong at what’s going on with him and she didn’t even pushed to ask. She just stood there, offering assurance and for once he felt like he really do have a good life.

“I’m alright, Junghwa,” he smiled as he patted the spot next to him, the girl complied as she steped in the room, “I’m the one who should be asking that to you—are you okay? With Mom and Dad’s decision?”

She nodded, “Yeah, I don’t mind—I don’t think I needed it anyway, going abroad,”

“But you have the luxury to be free secretly,” he frowned, “I feel like I’m grabbing that away from you if I fail,”

“Oppa,” Junghwa turned to him, cupping his cheeks in her hands, “The most important for Junghwa is oppa’s happiness. If you’re not happy with being in the council, then stop. I will be alright standing in for you,”

But Jimin shook his head, “No, I wouldn’t let you do that. Paris is your dream, Junghwa. You don’t get a lot of chances of mom and dad accepting what do you want to do!”

“But oppa—,”

“Hush, Junghwa, my thoughts are final—I can’t let you be in BH High. You will go to Paris, Junghwa. I will continue the school’s legacy,”

Junghwa sighed as she finally give up from arguing with him, “You know whatever happens I’ll always be on your side, right?”

“Right,” the red-haired boy nodded too, “Thank you, Jung-ie. You should go to bed now,”

“Yeah. Goodnight, oppa,”

“Goodnight, Junghwa,”

Min Yoongi was beyond desperate.

The scars on his wrists just keep multiplying to the point he doubt he can feel any kind of pain again. His legs has grew tired from running from his father—who’s strangely drunk in the morning.

He honestly can’t take this anymore—since he ran away from Jungkook that day, his father found out that he had been involved in a fight (he swears to god his dad must have some kind of spy for him at school) and he started spitting words that were like poison to his heart, even though Yoongi wondered why he never gotten used to it—he heard it everyday.

(But that’s perhaps because he secretly hopes that his father was still there inside of him).

He didn’t dare to say anything to his mother—she had been struggling with her new work and raising Jihoon, not to mention the threats that his father had still sending to her and how her old boyfirend that she used to trust just left her out in a middle of nowhere, he can’t just said to her that he had been used as a punching bag by his ex-husband. He’ll just make her worries added more.  

With what Namjoon said keep ringing inside his head, he feels like his being eaten alive by his demons. It’s torturing—to feel like everytime you wake up and voices inside your head confirming your worries, how it feels pathetic when you had tried your best but you can’t just win—Yoongi doesn’t really have the motivation to live anymore.

And he remembers how Jungkook sees him that day. Horrified was plastered in his eyes and Yoongi can’t help to just worry that the boy’ll see him differently—a freak, insane, or even a pathetic being. He can’t bear to have the younger look at him like that that he decided to just run away from him, despite Jungkook’s unconcious efforts that had made him feel a little much better about himself.

He bit his lips as he stepped in to the rooftop area as he wonders why he goes to school today. He had another bruised lips because of his drunk father that morning and the rumors of him being a part of a gang resurfaces, not to mention that he was involved in Namjoon’s little ourburst too. The whole school probably thought him as a fighter now.

The railings was inviting—as if it was calling him to come closer. The school’s building has three floor and he was right on the very top of it. Dropping a single glass would made it shatter straightly right to the ground.

The blonde-haired gulped as he gripped on the railing. What was he doing? He asked himself. Why is he climbing up the railing now?

Yoongi stared at the darkening sky above him. Grey clouds were gathering and small soft of thunders was heard. He predicted that it’s going to storm—probably going for some hours, even to morning.

He asked once again himself why were he standing on the railings right now. The metal wasn’t exactly that thick even though it was still stand-able, but it doesn’t mean that he had to jump on it. The blonde-haired boy turned his head down, staring below as it was so far away and hidden by the trees he even wondered if there is actually a ground beneath all of it.

Feeling lost, his thoughts keep asking him why is he doing this. He keep telling himself that it wouldn’t mean a thing—that he’ll just make more problems out of it, and he’ll just be a bother to everyone close to him.

But in the end, he’ll still do it anyways.

“I’m sorry, mom,” he whispered into nothingness, “I can’t do this anymore,”

Because he knows, deep inside, he just w