A/N: Hi, guys! My keyboard still isn’t fixed. I bought a wireless keyboard, but my laptop can’t detect it :/ On the plus side, the wireless keyboard works on my phone, so I type the update there, put it in an email, open the email in my laptop, and copy it to Word for editing. It’s a long and tedious process, but it works for now. Please bear with me.

It’s my birthdays, though, and regardless of keyboard problems, I always updates on my birthday. So, as an apology and as my birthday treat to you guys, double update today!

Enjoy! :D

Book 3: The (Crazier) Toddler Years

Chapter 3: Dirty

There comes a time in a toddler's where he would just like to stay smelly and dirty and muddy and stinky.

And yell at his umma "NO! NO BAFS! NO!"

And Kyuhyun's "toddler speech" to "actual speech" translator would quickly pick up that "bafs" is actually "baths."

The little evil minion absolutely just refused to take a bath!

What on earth was his poor, evil maknae umma supposed to do?

Chase after the dirty toddler all over the house, that's what.

Well, that's all that the self-proclaimed genius could come up with, at least.

So, there was Kyuhyun, trying to catch his son after Minhyun thoroughly enjoyed his Uncle Hankyung's pie.

Hankyung had visited the mother-son duo (again), mainly due to his paranoia when it comes to Kyuhyun being able to keep Minhyun and himself alive. And when the Chinese man visited this time, he brought a pie with him.

And not just any pie. It was blueberry pie! It was his favorite (and only, really) nephew's most absolutely beloved kind of pie, after all. (Kyuhyun protested that he wanted cherry pie, but apparently, the evil maknae's wishes now just come as second priority; Minhyun's favorites are taken into account first now when Hankyung cooks. *cue pouting evil maknae*)

However, by "enjoying" the pie, it seemed as if Minhyun managed to get just as much pie on his face and on his shirt as much as he had actually gotten into his mouth.

Kyuhyun really wasn't looking forward to having to get all that blueberry stain off the shirt. But hey, his hyung was visiting, anyway, so the evil maknae could probably er his poor, kindly hyung to do the laundry for him.  Kyuhyun's bigger concern was how he was going to get his actual son cleaned up, given Minhyun's recent vendetta against baths.

"Minhyun, come on! It's almost bedtime, and you can't go to bed like that!"

"Minhyunnie can!" the little boy shouted as he skillfully dodged his mother's arms.

"No, you can't," the annoyed mother said flatly. "Ants will crawl all over you, with all those blueberries on your face. Now, do you want that?"

"Ants better than bafs, umma."

And with that the little boy went zooming off again, running away from his mother that was intent on hauling him off to the bathroom and straight into the bathtub.

As his son disappeared off into the other room, Kyuhyun let out an internal scream of hysteria and despair.

Internal, because he didn't want to give the watching Chinese man the satisfaction. Judging from the smirk on Hankyung's face, his no-good hyung was already enjoying Kyuhyun's suffering too much for the evil maknae's liking.

Kyuhyun couldn't help but pull at his hair with his fingers, though--an outward sign of his great distress manifesting itself.

"Not so easy dealing with such a little evil minion, is it?" Hankyung smiled happily from his place on the couch.

"You could help with trying to catch him, you know!" the evil maknae snapped.

"Why? He didn't become so evil because of me. He became an evil little minion because of you." As far as Hankyung was concerned, Kyuhyun's just getting what he deserved.

Kyuhyun growled lowly, then ran off after his son again.

It took another half an hour of running, planning, running, bribing, even more running, pushing his evil genius brain to be able to outwit such a young boy, and yet even more running. Finally, Kyuhyun ma