The days in America were hectic but not in the way I expected. I imagined doing as many things as possible to promote our single, with interviews, TV appearances, radio and fan meetings: to tell the truth I hadn’t looked at our schedule for the ten days we would spend in America because I was too focused on spending New Years with Kyung Ho filming Good Sister Season 2 and the radio program with Jonghyun.

The radio program went well. Surprisingly well, actually. He had looked a bit deep in thoughts during our live singing but after the performance he applauded and his soft DJ voice was talking about how impressive the song is. It felt forced at times, the way he shaped the words in the sentences, but on the flight afterwards I kept telling myself it was only my own imagination. Maybe I wanted it to be forced for him, that he had been struggling to be Jjong-DJ when I was there. The reaction from listeners was okay, a lot of fans commented that we were a bit awkward and then letting the awkwardness slide because our fans still found the whole hour cute. They commented online why the radio program turned out so cute with the three of us, but all reasons were just imaginations in the mind of fans – saying we looked at each other constantly and so on.

In America our schedule was not much about interview and appearances at all. Not a single talk show, just a few short interviews on music channels and radio programs. Then what did we do for ten days? Mostly we were practicing and taking pictures, filming for future footage, doing a photo shoot for ELLE American and our album jacket shoot, and practicing for our first international album. Every day has been busy.

A few days after coming to Los Angeles we attended the 41st People’s Choice Awards, where we even won an award named Favourite Breakout Artist ((I think we lost it a bit at that award show); and we got to meet movie star and singers, icons and celebrities, childhood crushes and people we have never even heard of but who apparently are popular in America. Just like last year when we attended two or three awards outside Asia, I think what struck us the most was the people that recognized us. We made fools of ourselves towards some of the cast in The Big Bang Theory when we were chatting about them attending the award show and Jim Parsons (who plays Sheldon Cooper) sneaked into the conversation to say the cast is really not that great, and we had screamed straight out as if he was a disgusting bug – but he was nice and took a picture with us anyway, somehow. His presence made Emelia’s day, that’s for sure. We even met Matt Bomer – by name I had no idea who he was so Maria had an outburst on me before we spotted him in the crowd and 5 Pieces fell in love in the hottest man in suit ever. In an interview afterwards we admitted we were like fans who had sneaked inside to take secretively glances at all the superstars, but the interviewer had attended the show and said it was caught by media when Chris Evans (you know, Captain America) excitedly communicated with fans at the red carpet to sing his favourite song these days; 5 Pieces’ [You Thought Wrong Of Me], but a little bit different because he doesn’t know the Korean words. I must say, it didn’t take long until Maria shared on SNS saying her life has been completed. Let’s just say it was a night of celebrity fever for us because all around us were faces we couldn’t imagine were in reach for our eyes to see (not through a TV screen but in reality) and we had Iggy Azalea and Ellen DeGeneres speaking warmly about us in their interviews.

It was the best night, actually, during the whole trip, yet I can’t remember all of is when thinking back – too overwhelmed. The celebrity fever must’ve hit me.

We met a lot of fans during the trip though, both in Los Angeles and in New York we had different events where we met fans and between our schedules we could meet on the street because wherever we went, fans came along. After six years and I still don’t understand how they cam know everything; which hotel we are at, our schedules that aren’t even public. They are crazy – in a good way.

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Headline 04th: Fans Welcome 5 Pieces To America At The Airport

Headline 04th: 5 Pieces Meet American Fans During Open Interview In Los Angeles Ahead Of New Single Release

Monday, Headline 05th: Music Video For 5 Pieces’ 6th International Single [Dear Diary] Is Revealed

Headline 05th: Hannah Releases Korean + Japanese Single [Bittersweet] Feature Carolina

Headline 05th: [Bittersweet] Debuts At TOP5 In Japan

Headline 06th: 5 Pieces Talk GIRLS POWER And New Single [Dear Diary] In English Interview

Headline 07th: [Oh] Music Video Released Along With Concert Tickets – Sold Out Under Fifteen Minutes!

Headline 07th: 5 Pieces Is Top Celebrities’ Favourite During The ‘41st People Choice Awards’

Headline 07th: 5 Pieces Attends The ‘41st People Choice Awards’ And Win Favourite Breakout Artist Award

Headline 08th: Watch The Many Celebrities That Praised 5 Pieces At The ‘41st People Choice Awards’ In Los Angeles Yesterday

Headline 08th: Rookies In America, 5 Pieces Show Everything Else But The Vibe Of A Rookie

Headline 08th: 6th International Single [Dear Diary] Released Worldwide

Headline 08th: The Ladies Of 5 Pieces Share An Acoustic Performance Of [Dear Diary]

Headline 08th: 5 Pieces’ Favourite Food, Recent Celebrity Crushes And More Talked About At Los Angeles Radio

Headline 09th: 5 Pieces’ Hannah Apparently Sent A Bouquet Of Flowers To Boyfriend Jonghyun’s Showcase Yesterday

Headline 10th: Maria Shares A Pretty New York Selfie With Hannah and Carolina On Instagram

Headline 11th: American Media Runs After 5 Pieces During Recent New York Trip

Headline 11th: [Bittersweet] Is The Most Favourite Song Played This Week

Monday, Headline 12th: 5 Pieces Say They Have Worked With People All Around The World For Their International Album

Headline 12th: 5 Pieces’ Single [Dear Dairy] Sells Well Worldwide, International Album Announced Next

Headline 14th: Emelia & Julia Seen Enjoying Some Shopping In New York

Headline 14th: 5 Pieces’ Maria Meets Her SM Town Seniors At The Opening Of ‘SMTOWN@COEXARTIUM’

Headline 15th: Carolina Accepts Three Awards On Behalf Of 5 Pieces At Golden Disk Awards + Musical Performance

Headline 16th: SNSD’s Tiffany Sends Love With 5 Pieces’ Carolina Leaving Beijing After Golden Disk Awards

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Coming back to Korea, I need to focus on one thing – prepare for my solo comeback. Julia and Emelia stayed in New York for an extra day, Carolina went to Beijing for Golden Disk Awards (though she went alone she has SNSD-TTS with her) and Maria went back to Korea with me, but to go home and lie in the sofa sleeping and giving love to our pets was Maria’s plan and not close to mine. While I was in the practice-room she kept sending pictures of how she was cuddling with Ace and how my kitten Tiger was sleeping next to her, Milo kept turning his towards her for each picture – he likes being patted on his back.

It’s now Friday, January 16. This month is passing by extremely fast, mostly because we have just spent ten days in America preparing for our international album and promoting the pre-single for it, and it feels like the days I could’ve spent preparing for my comeback has been spent at photo shoots in America. I have been at a book meeting for a few hours (it was long and I got to talk a lot, go through things and remember how I have written the third book in Joe as well as meet the crew who have been working on it with me) and after that it was practice, practice and more practice.

The red sweater has sleeves covering my hands as I look through the paper hung up on the wall. The set list for the concert we are practicing for. I know we should focus on practicing for [NEW ME] music video that is in a few days but we have practiced a lot for it and we need to prepare for the other songs as well. The set list isn’t even completed. We have changed it two times just today, switching places on songs and even removing songs or adding songs. Its sixteen days left for the first concert.

“I don’t like this,” I comment with a finger pointing at the paper. I glance up at my dance teacher, who is in charge of helping me make the set list along with a bunch of other people.

“Could we take it tomorrow?” my teacher asks and I pout at her because whenever I come up with something, I want to set that thought free before I loose it. “Let’s just practice the way we have it now. You’re going to meet Yong Hyun tomorrow about the outfits; I’m sure you will change your mind once you have done that.”

She is right. In preparations for the concert I have been going through segments and clothes for the concert as well as the album. Since the album has most things sorted out, we need to decide the clothes – which mean clothes I can dance and perform in, not just look good in for the album jacket. It’s exciting to be working on an album like this, to do it without 5 Pieces and yet being able to participate in so many decisions and planning. I am excited. Whenever we are practicing or going through things for the comeback, I get excited.

I put my focus on our mirror reflection, to practice the remixes of past solo songs and brand new songs. It is a quite impressive crew I am working with; the same people I work with for 5 Pieces’ promotions and albums. The dance crew is the same, they are the most positive and energetic crew I will ever meet and since most of them have worked with 5 Pieces for some time they know me and my style enough to come with their own ideas on how we can do better. I love the feedback and ideas, I love the breaks we have where we just talk about things and boll the words back and forth; I love that their minds are just as focused as mine to make this the best comeback we can manage to do. Our dance teachers and choreographers are hardworking, not as patient as the dancers but with effort they can make us move in synch to the beat of their clapping. That’s not even half of the crew I am working with for the album, concert and promotions.

According to the agency, this is a big solo project – [Bittersweet] single is the beginning, followed by the concert and album and everything that comes with it.

Ah, and I can’t forget Good Sister. Our maid and someone hired by the agency has helped out to fix our house as SBS this evening has set up cameras in the house for the weekend’s filming. Kyung Ho is sleeping over tonight and for the next two nights as well; the guest room on our second floor is where his room has been prepared. That’s where Maria’s brother and girlfriend slept over the holiday.

Though I know he is sleeping over tonight and that we have cameras set up, I stay practicing until after midnight.

We say goodnight and are in good moods when heading our own directions to get some sleep for tomorrow. In my leggings and sweater I feel warm in the chilly night air, the winter jacket wrapped around me as Manager Lee gives me a ride home. Everything is okay between us, maybe it is that he celebrated his birthday in New York with us and we threw him a surprise party that puts him in such a good mood, or just that I am in a good mood puts him in a better mood too as he can communicate with me. I don’t know. We get along well these days anyway.

“Don’t forget the cameras now,” he reminds me when dropping me off outside the house.

“Ah,” I remember and nod. “Drive safely, Oppa.”

“I will,” he promises and waits until I have come through the port before he drives away.

I am curious of how they have set up the cameras. During a meeting the SBS crew had gone through where to place the cameras and they even scanned our house to know where and where not to put cameras. Maria and Emelia’s rooms are off-limits, as are the bathrooms. Other than that, I don’t know. I don’t think they have camera in my room – they didn’t have it for the first season.

As soon as I step inside the hall, taking off my shoes, I look around after the first camera: spotted. The same as I did at the ski resort, I walk around the first floor looking at the cameras and greeting most of them. Just small cameras put up by the corner of a room, up in the ceiling. I left my bag by my room and walked towards the living-room to check the floor when Tiger came running out of my room to greet and follow me.

“Hello Tiger,” I whisper and squat down to pick her up before walking around the kitchen, checking the bathroom just in case – no camera there. The cameras are everywhere – not in every room but they are covering the space in the rooms they are in. “Have you greeted the cameras, Tiger?”

I am whispering and being as quiet as possible, but I cuddle with Tiger, smile and show a good mood for the cameras until I wonder how I will be in the morning – a zombie the first hour. With that thought I finish the greeting and wash up to go to bed, and I take a glance upstairs in the guestroom to find Kyung Ho sleeping.

Tiger goes to bed only when making sure I have lied down and that I am not going anywhere. There I spot it. Lying in my bed, cell phone in hand checking the alarm while the rest of the room is black and my room lightly closed with enough space for Tiger to come and go; I see a red light up at the corner of my bedroom.

“Hu,” I mutter and turn on the lamp on the bedside table, to see there is a camera filming in my room.

It’s a good thing I have cleaned up in here, or it would be a mess from when I came back from New York.

A little bit too aware of the camera in my bedroom I keep twisting and turning in bed, waking up a few times during the night.

In the morning I am woken up by voices. Emelia pokes her head inside my room to say the filming crew for Good Sister is here, but adding that I can sleep a bit longer. The crew has talked about it too; they will take their positions and film us, but we will pretend they aren’t there as it is a reality show. Though I should go up and greet them, my alarm is not supposed to ring until two hours; my eyes won’t open either, I am tired, and I stay in bed.

When Tiger jumps up on my bed to play