CHANGJO POV   There was, perhaps, two weeks 'till Christmas.  I knew I had to make the gift-list soon, but was just too lazy to do so. I had no idea of what I'd buy for my friends this year. Though.. would it be strange if I gave a present to Chanhee? I mean, he's still my friend... the rest of it doesn't matter, right? Ricky had been even more cheerful lately, claiming that it was the Christmas time and that it was the time to be happy and laugh. It would seem like nobody, except of Chanhee, was sharing his enthusiasm, not even that Myunsoo guy who seemed to be so attached to Ricky. I glanced down at my unfinished biology homework and sighed, figuring I was completely out of concentration. So instead of bothering with sitting on that place and pretend to be studying, I decided to go out for a walk. As I slowly, but progressively, made my way to the centre of the town, I was greeted with the warm Christmas atmosphere that had managed to bring out a softest smile on my lips. “kyaah, I haven't expected to see you here”! Suddenly, Ricky's cheerful voice interrupted my train of thoughts and I turned towards him, only to chuckle upon noticing the Christmas hat on his head.  “oh and here I thought I was being stalked” I purposely tried sounding cute and he waved his right hand, rolling his eyes. “pabo... wanna go on a drink with me”? He asked and I shrugged, but soon smirked lightly. “as in... a date”? I , earning myself a punch in the shoulder which was soon followed with a blushing Ricky. “don't even joke about that”! “as if you're not affected already.” I purposely cooed, only a moment after laughing my off because of his cute glare. “fine! Be like that”! He tried to look angry and he even stormed away as if to prove his point, but I caught up with him soon enough. “come on, you can't deny that I'm handsome.” by the sudden blush on his cheeks, I could tell that he did think so. But obviously had his own pride. “just forget it... I'm heading home!” he seemed to be on the verge of tears by now, and that was when my worried mode . “Ricky.. you know I didn't mean to hurt you, right”? As I grabbed his hand, I let him think for a while about my question. “I know, I just... there's so much things on my mind lately...” he whispered weakly and I could only stare in confusion at this new Ricky I had in front of myself. The Ricky I know is never depressed.  It makes me wonder... just how exactly does he feel while he's hiding behind that constant smile? “does it have to do with Myungsoo”? I carefully asked him, expectantly staring at his face. When I saw that he didn't turn mad at me for asking him that, I sighed quietly in relief. “partly.” he answered and then glanced at me kinda insecurely, biting his lower lip in an adorable way. “why are you asking, anyway”? “just so.” I shrugged my shoulders. “I suppose I just... care for people a lot.” “I guess that's why Myungsoo actually likes you.” Ricky giggled on his own private joke  and I only furrowed my eyebrows without saying anything more. “so what about that drink”? He innocently asked me after a while and I only softly smiled at him, nodding instead of responding.   ~~    half an hour later, we were finally seated in a bar completely covered in red colours. It was Ricky's decision, of course. He was back to being his 'smiley' self and I was surprised at how fast his moods could actually shift from one to another. As I absently tapped my fingers against the table, my mind drifted off to an odd topic. What should I buy Ricky for Christmas? I frowned, wondering where that question came from all of a sudden. I thought my gift-list was put on a I'll-do-it-later list until I would no longer be able to prolong it. Then why was I so curious already now? After we got the drinks we had ordered, I let out a long sigh before cocking my head aside in curiosity. “so what about Myungsoo is actually bothering you”? I wasn't sure if I was allowed to ask him questions like that, but I was genuinely interested in finding out the answer.  “it's.... hard to explain.” he said, nervously playing with the cup in his hands as if it was the most important thing in the world. Though he didn't seem to be uncomfortable with me. “let me guess, then. Myungsoo is in love with you”? I asked him and his eyes only lightly twitched in surprise, but he quickly hid it. “how did you know”? A small smirk found its way down on my lips as I took a sip of the cappuccino in my hands. “it's quite obvious, don't you think”? “I guess...” he awkwardly answered and then let out one frustrated sigh. “nobody seems to understand me, though”! With a small pout on his lips, he crossed his arms over his chest but as his lover lip quivered, I knew that he was extremely worried about something. “try me out.” I bluntly spoke and Ricky sent me a short, curious glance before shaking his head at something only he knew the background to and then focused back on replying to me. “I've never been in love. And therefore... I don't know what love feels like, I guess.” he softly said, but it was obvious that the topic was still awkward for him. “for me, it was always about dancing, having a lot of friends, partying... simply having fun. For me love was a 'no way' thing. And when Myungsoo so abruptly confessed to me years ago...” he shook his head as if it was hard for him to explain himself through words in that moment. “it was like my whole world crashed, actually. I had tried considering the possibility of us being together, I had considered trying to fall for him, but... it didn't work out. And now everyone blames me”! His voice cracked a bit and it was in that moment that I'd felt as though we had known each other for years. It felt as though something was bounding us. Something like... love. But in such odd circumstances. “I actually do understand you.” I softly said and as he glanced at me with those cute puppy like eyes, a part of me easily melted at the sight. For what reason, I had no clue. “really”? He asked, his voice full of hope. I simply smiled at him and nodded my head. “I know how it feels like to love and not be loved in return. I've been through that. But I'd let go of him because I knew that I could never blame love for capturing my heart. Because, even though it hurt like hell, it was still one of the most beautiful feelings in the world for me. But his heart wasn't bounded to be captured by me. So that's why I understand you.” I told him, for the first time in a while not feeling burdened by talking about Chanhee. I felt... relief, actually.  “I guess I only now understand Chanhee... it's like, you've opened my eyes.” he abruptly said, shaking his head in disbelief. “whole this time I'd been wondering why the hell he never fell for you when... I never thought that someone could ask me the same. Why did I never feel anything for Myungsoo”? “yeah, why did you not”? I trick-questioned him and unconsciously leaned a bit closer to him. He didn't seem to notice it, as he puckered his lips while thinking about my question, obviously too lost in his own little world. “I don't know... I just never felt it.. the butterflies, you know? He is the sweetest person I know. But...” “your heart doesn't skip a bit every time he's around, you don't stare at him smiling for Lord knows how much until he notices you stare and you then blush, you don't think about him the first thing in the morning and don't fall asleep thinking about him... you..” I was about to continue until I had noticed that I wasn't even talking about his emotions. Instead, those were the ones deeply hidden inside of my own heart. The ones I'd kept hidden for all this time. But had easily let Ricky see them. Ricky seemed to notice the same as he sadly smiled at me. “do you think you'll ever be able to get over him”? He asked me and I smiled, brushing off the pessimism. “of course! Of course I will”! Then why did it still feel so false? When even Ricky could tell that I wasn't so sure in my words? “I guess... the two of us really understand each other then, right”? Ricky softly said, his hand somehow ending on mine. I glanced at our hands and smiled too, not having anything in my mind actually. I just felt so... relaxed.  “yeah.. yeah we do.” I answered back and then sighed. I was sure that love wouldn't let me go just yet. I was her prisoner, after all. But maybe this time, some things would change. Maybe, the kidnapper of my heart?     MYUNGSOO POV   “why are you smiling”? I questioned my mom suspiciously, not being able to read it off her face. She shrugged her shoulders and softly smiled at me, though it was obvious that it was a fake smile.  She was up to something. “nothing special, dear.” “the last time you said that was when we had to move here in Seoul.” without having a notice of it, my voice slightly trembled in anger. I'll be damned if I had to move once again. “Myungsoo, you know my job is important and tiring and therefore...” “I don't”! I yelled at her, not even trying to control myself. “your stupid job always comes before everything else! Even before your own son”! Those were my last words before I stormed off to my own room and locked the door behind me.  Despite her useless tries of calling me out, I didn't even flinch. I grew cold towards that. I used to understand it. But right now, I can't take it anymore! Just as I get accustomed to one place, I have to move to another. And it has been like that for the past two years. We were almost never at the same place for too long.   After a tiring night in which I'd barely gotten any sleep, I finally got ready for school and then drove there without even saying goodbye to my mother. Only after the tenth call on my phone, I had decided to answer it. “Myungsoo, you can't be behaving like this”! She warned me but I only hysterically laughed. “I'm soon to be in my legal age. So mom, you are the one that should be careful about your behaviour. I swear, one more thing.. one more thing and you'll lose me, mother.” my voice was softer by the end of the sentence. Despite my anger, I still had some respect for her. After all, she is the woman that gave me birth and I do cherish her a lot. But I don't need a life like this. I need freedom. “Myungsoo...” she tried using that hurt tone of hers, knowing how much it usually affects me. But not today. Not anymore. “I have nothing more to say to you.” I sternly replied and then hung up.  Parking my car in front of the school, I'd left the phone in my car just to avoid her calls and then headed towards the entrance. As I reached the classroom, I sat by the extremely hyper Chanhee. He seemed to have made everything out with Byunghun. Then why weren't they sitting together? Oh right... he's not even in the classroom... “let's skip classes.” someone whispered in my ear and it took me a while to realize that it was Ricky. Chanhee was too busy writing something in his notebook with a goofy smile never leaving his lips, that he didn't even notice me disappearing all of a sudden. “what's with the sudden wish to skip classes with me”? I teasingly asked him and he shrugged his shoulders, all along staring down at his feet. “this is what we used to do... you said you wanted us to be friends again.” friends... only that... “yeah... so are you willing to try it out”? I hid all the pain from my voice and Ricky shyly nodded. With a deep sigh, I pulled him towards my car and drove us to his studio. “I'm really interested in your dancing lessons.” I teasingly smiled at him and he chuckled, nodding his head as if approving my interest.  “I have some new super cool moves, you're gonna like them! I have to show you how I decorated everything and how awesome the speakers in the studio are... oh and..” as he continued rambling happily about everything, the smile on my lips never