CHANGJO POV

“what happened to the two of you”? I approached the two boys that kept on glaring at each other, sitting as far as possible one from another.

Niel dramatically sighed and finally broke the contact, murmuring the word: “nothing” so quietly, that I couldn't help but frown in confusion. It took me a while to decipher the meaning.

Just as I tried making eye-contact with Chanhee, he averted his glance on the other side so I could not do that. It made me frown even more.

Because of the bell, I had to give up on trying to find out what was happening, so I just sat on my place and did my best to focus on the class. Though with not much success, since I really hate classes.

Throughout the couple of next hours, they kept on avoiding each other. It was right then that I was completely pissed off. Has Niel found out? What the hell is happening?

When the lunch time came, the situation was even worse. Not only were the two of them ignoring each other, there was Byunghun too who kept on staring emotionlessly at his food, not even bothering with eating it.

Was I the only normal one here today?

Being the curious maknae I always was, I decided to investigate the situation. I couldn't ask Byunghun because he'd probably be talking in some crazy riddles of his and I don't want to spend my time uselessly. There's no use of questioning Chanhee either cause he'll just probably smile at me and say that everything's alright.

I have to talk to Niel then. He'll give me some answers for sure.

Pushing both Chanhee and Byunghun away after the school ended, I dragged only Niel with me. We ended up in the closest park, sitting on the swings.

“why did you bring me here”? Niel asked me, half confused, half curious. I took a deep sigh, glancing at him. “I'm wondering why Chanhee and you are fighting.”

“ah that...” Niel murmured, all of a sudden seemingly distracted. He kept on playing with the hem of his shirt, obviously nervous.

“yes, that. What happened”? I asked and Niel pouted. That was my sign that I would most definitely get my answer. He's ready to get it all off his chest.

“we had a fight yesterday... I know that he's hiding something from me and I just know that he's heartbroken, but what worries me is that he doesn't want to talk to me about it! It's like... he hates me once again. I can't go through that again... I can't take anymore of secrets... why? Why doesn't he want to tell me what's bothering him”!? He really did let it all out, didn't he?

I sighed, knowing that I could tell him everything myself. But wouldn't that be betraying Chanhee's feelings? Although, he never specifically asked me to hide it from Niel... it would be easier if Niel just knew everything.

But would that cause me losing Chanhee?

'stop being selfish, Changjo!' I warned myself. 'I want everyone happy.'

“he only wants to protect you.” I softly said and Niel suspiciously glanced at me. “so you know what that's all about”? I could only nod.

Niel seemed like he was about to snap at me, but then he sighed, track of realization flickering in his eyes. “I understand. You don't have to tell me.”

I unconsciously smiled, congratulating Niel for passing the test. If he tried to forcefully drag the answer out of me, I wouldn't tell him. But seeing that he still had respect for me, I decided to finally end it all.

“Chanhee is worried that you'd abandon him and hate him forever if you knew what was happening.” I started and Niel's eyes narrowed. He leaned onto the bench and looked in my eyes as if he was searching for some answers. “why would I ever hate him”? He murmured in confusion and I closed my eyes for a moment before opening them again. “Niel, try to guess. I can only tell you that Chanhee's not in love with me.” my voice was pained, I couldn't help it. I only want for Chanhee to be happy, but in the same time it hurts me so much that it's not me who can give him that happiness.

Niel looked more than just stunned. It seemed like his brain was working faster than ever, but in the same time he was still confused. But when a pained sigh escaped his lips, I knew that he got it all right.

“they had something.” he whispered, the look in his eyes so hopeful, like he only wanted to hear me say no. But I couldn't. No more lies.

“yes. Chanhee admitted that he fell for him from the very own start. Byunghun is still... avoiding the truth. He doesn't want to think it's the truth.” I explained and Niel closed his eyes, his lips slightly trembling.

I decided to continue. “ever since you came back, Chanhee's been trying to cling onto me for support. It seems like he's trying so hard to forget about Byunghun... he feels guilty.”

“guilty enough not to share that fact with me”? Niel spat out, gritting his teeth. He seemed like he was about to hit something, so I chose to step away from his as far as possible so I wouldn't become the victim.

“you know, I would have understood if he told me himself. But why the hell did he choose to hide it from me”!? His anger was slowly boiling and I could only shrug, not knowing how to comfort him. I'm not so good with words, after all.

“God, I should have known!” he made a face of disgust and it was my time to frown now. “are you actually putting all the blame on them now”? I asked him carefully, disbelief obviously written all over my face. Niel scoffed and eagerly nodded, but didn't say anything.

As calmly as possible, I uttered the next words: “if my memory serves me right, Niel, you have abandoned all of us without even a word and haven't talked to us for years.” he flinched upon my words. “you came back, thinking that everything would be the same as you've left behind. But time changes things, if you haven't noticed that fact. And after all, tell me who CAP is? Are you willing to explain”? I folded my arms across my chest, having my face expressionless. Niel nervously shifted on his spot, now obviously embarrassed. Well, serves him right.

“how do you know about CAP”? He quietly asked.

“I saw the text messages the other day, don't you remember”? He only then gasped, suddenly remembering that day. But then his face saddened again.

“am I not allowed to text people”? He whispered and a smirk found its way on my lips. “are Byunghun and Chanhee not allowed to fall in love only because you say so”? I could tell, Niel was lost for words after my question. I knew that he wasn't actually mad at them. Hurt, of course. But mad? no.

“why are you with Chanhee then”? Niel then asked me and I deeply sighed. “do you really think Byunghun would accept Chanhee into his life just like that”? I asked him first and Niel deeply frowned, but patiently awaited for my explanation. “lets say that I kinda hooked them up. Chanhee has always been interesting, and has easily caught my eyes. So therefore, I knew a lot of things about him. I especially knew about his love for writing. He seemed... like a perfect person to make Byunghun love again.” Niel evidently frowned even deeper, seeing that I was the one who actually created that spark of love between them. “I suggested to Byunghun that he finds a writer to create a memory for him. In other words, to write him a story about you two. He was against my idea at first, but after a while of thinking he got interested in my idea and asked me to find him someone who'd be willing to write something like that. I suggested Chanhee.” I paused for a while to regain my breath and chuckled upon seeing Niel's shocked face.

“but everything was not going according to my plan. Neither of them seemed interested in love at first. Byunghun even laughed in my face after I told him he should date Chanhee. He was still crazily in love with you.” it was my time to frown, especially after seeing the spark of relief in Niel's eyes. Was he still hoping to get Byunghun back?

“as for Chanhee... you know how he is. You can never know about just what he's thinking about. He's a good actor. At first, I'd believed him when he told me he felt nothing for Byunghun. But then again, I noticed the way he sometimes glanced at him in school as if he was expecting something. He was falling for him. But Byunghun was still a tougher problem. So I bluntly asked Chanhee to date me, and tried as hard as possible to be all lovey dovey with him in front of Byunghun. My plan worked and Byunghun became jealous. Extremely jealous. Without having to even say it, I could tell that he was slowly growing fond of Chanhee too. But with Byunghun being the stubborn fool he is, I knew that the things could never go smoothly for them. So I decided to stay by Chanhee's side as his support, to comfort him whenever he needed comfort because I knew how much he'd be crying.”

“wait a minute”! Niel gasped, threateningly pointing his finger at me. “you knew how that would affect Chanhee, and you still made him go through all of that? Yet you still dare to say you like him!?”

“I never said I like him. Love him, yes. Like him would not be enough. And yes Niel, I dare to say I love him. Because there's a difference between you and me. When you didn't know what to do anymore and when the things became too painful, you immediately gave up and ran away. But I stayed with Chanhee from the very first day. I stayed with Byunghun even when you left him brokenhearted like that. I gave all of myself into making both of them happy, and you dare to question my love?” I slightly snarled at him, but it was enough to make him think about my words more clearly. And as he wrapped his arms around his shoulders, I knew that he understood my message.

“but now that you're back... you're making it even more difficult for all of us.” I sighed and Niel scoffed. “are you saying that it would be better if I never even came back at the first place”? His voice seemed confident, but the look in his eyes was utterly filled with pain. That was probably why my voice softened.

“that's not what I'm trying to say. Just on the contrary. Byunghun will be able to sort his fee