Blood, there is blood soaking my arm and the shirt of someone I am up against. My fingertips are cold, my body is getting colder and colder. The body against me is warm, but my blood is everywhere. My arm hurts, the pain is pulsing up my forearm. My body feels light, I want to let go of everything since everything I have ever cared about has let me go. But there is something that is ticking inside me telling otherwise. There's a light in all the darkness that has become what is my life now. I've ruined everything. I destroyed it all before it could destroy itself. Lights flashing above me, voices yelling. One bright light flashes in my eyes, making everything very unclear, almost dark. I see nothing anymore, I see nothing but my mind. I hear voices, talking as if there was something happening. They soon fade away and I feel my body lighten up and my mind is ripped away from me. No more pain, I feel nothing. I know nothing as if I am not myself anymore but just another thing floating around endlessly in time. Is this what comes next? Is there truly nothing after it all ends? Clouds and hallucinations occupy my questions, it all floats in front of me as if it were a strip of and empty canvas slowly being painted. The things I see are of a little girl, that little girl goes through many things. Not one good thing happening to her ever in the time that she grows. When everything seems as if it were getting better or coming close to what is considered normal. It eventually all falls apart shattering her mending heart. The strip cracks and shatters like glass but it just fades away in a ray of color. Is that who I am? Is that what has happened to me throughout the miserable life that I have lived? What has become of me, I have done nothing. I am nothing.

Waking up in a hospital room is never a good thing, I was saved once again. I never expected this to happen. There is nothing I can do but lay here looking around the room. My body is weak and my stomach is turning like I need to throw up but cringing as if I haven't eaten anything today.
“You're awake” a voice sounds from the door.
It's a male voice, a part of me wants more than anything than to look up at who's there but then again there is a part of me that wants to keep is a mystery just in case it isn't the person I thought it to be. I turn my head to the window as this person comes and sits at the edge of my bed. Pulling hair out of my face they sit there staring at me.
“Why would you do something like this to yourself....”

I refuse to say anything in return worried I may say the wrong thing. I feel a tear rolling out of my eye, I did this because there was no one else left for me to run to.
“Your dad doesn't know about this yet. Should I tell him?” He asks.
Gently I shake my head as I stare at the clouds outside. I don't know how long I have been in here it could have been hours it could have been days but I won't know that until I ask.
“Why won't you look at me?” he asks.
I don't want to look, because now I know it won't be the one I want it to be sitting there next to me. It really has come to this, Junhong left me and there isn't anyone left for me. He doesn't even know about what happened. It should have been him there...
“I'm just gonna go.”
He slowly gets up and I can't take it anymore, I turn my head and grab his wrist lightly. I look up to see Eric there. I knew it would be him.
“I guess I'll stay.” He sits back down.
I nod lightly.
“Alex isn't as mad at you as it seems.” He looks at me.
I just look at him wondering what he means by what he is saying.
“Not gonna talk to me?”
I don't respond.
“I wouldn't either after what happened.” He sighs.
I look down at his nose which looks to be bruised, and just now I noticed that he wasn't wearing his glasses...only because they were broke by a certain someone.
“It's not your fault.” He looks up at the wall. “It's my own for letting something like that happen”
It's not his fault...It's my fault for pushing myself onto him the way I did.
“I'd be lying if I didn't say that I didn't have feelings for you....” He looks down at his hands.
He has feelings for me?
“I would say had but its not that easy to throw away your feelings for someone, but the way I see it now after you