"This is your apartment." Moa pointed out, walking me around a large space.

I left my suitcase by the door and walked around the space nervously. It was mainly wood and the bed was on the floor, compared to my usual bed. The kitchen was small, indicating not much use.

(Imagine a fridge in that open space at left)

The bathroom was small and the shower was also a bath.

Over all the apartment was small, but was decorated nicely.

It'll be a while before I get used to this.

I sighed and listened to her continue talking about how the apartment would  be nice once I got used to it.  But I could tell the moment I stepped in and smelled a clean smell, it was going to take a while.

"I'm going to take you to a restaurant, nothing too special." Moa smiled to me.

"Alright, thank you." I bowed a little.

She had me place my suitcase on the floor of my room and follow her and Suto downstairs. According to Moa, I was supposed to train with the boy groups in 2 days. The fact that being a girl to be kept secret. The boss wanted to make sure I could do either part. So I was requested to wear some male clothing and a beanie to cover my feminine head. As we headed out of the building, Luhan and Sehun from EXO walked in.

They were both in casual clothes, jeans, a jacket, and a hat. They bowed to us and spoke in Korean. Luhan stared at me like a deer caught in headlights and Sehun asked a question while looking at me. Moa chuckled and responded; the two boys looked at her and nodded.

"Ohhhhh...." They both smiled.

"Hello." Sehun bowed and tried to speak English.

I smiled, "Hello," and bowed back.

"Where America from you?" Luhan asked.

"What?" I was confused by his attempt at English, looking to Moa for help.

Luhan desperately spoke to Moa as if to clear up the situation.

"He asked where in America you are from." Moa explained.

"Oh!" I laughed nervously, "Michigan." I spoke slowly.

Luhan attempted to say it and it made me laugh. His attempt came out as 'Machigun.' Someone came rushing from behind me.

"Luhan! Sehun!" They yelled and started talking to them quickly in Korean.

"We got go, see you." Luhan smiled and waved.

"Bye." I waved back.

The three people rushed off in a hurry, leaving the three of us to be alone.

"Well, let's go." Suto smiled and placed his hand on the small of my back, ushering me outside.

The three of us went to a small restaurant and ordered a soy sauce meat stove dinner. We personally cooked the meat in a pan full of soy sauce, letting the sauce soak into the thin red strips. As I watched small bubbles boil around my strip and turn its sides brown, I felt myself zone out. The bubbles were just a small blur in my vision, their constant popping and moving not registering as my mind stopped. Soft mumbling became a buzz of conversation. Suddenly my name was mumbled into my ear and my eyes readjusted and slowly returned my mind to its original state.

"What?" I asked and turned to look at who was next to me.

Suto looked at me with concern, "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, sorry, I guess I zoned out for a moment." I smiled weakly.

"You're tired, aren't you?" He asked.

"A little." I chuckled.

"We'll take you home after this." He nodded and looked to Moa.

"Don't worry, we want you to get some sleep as well." Moa smiled.

"Thank you." I mumbled.

We finished our meal and went back to the company. Moa was called into the office and left Suto to walk me to my apartment. I felt my body being weighed down as I saw the dark sky clearly through the windows.

 "Almost there." Suto mumbled as we climbed the stairs.

My legs began getting heavier as we neared my floor. I sighed and opened the door that had a big 5 on it. My head was down, watching where my feet were going and I ran right into someone.

"Sorry." I bowed and looked up in a daze.

My breath caught in my chest as two more people from EXO stood before me in shock. One of them was the man I was in love with, Kyungsoo. Next to him was the other man I was attracted to, Kai.

They both looked at me for a moment. Suto came up from behind me and froze when he saw them. He said 'sorry' in Korean several times and then began pulling on me, directing me to my room.

"Wait." Kyungsoo asked as I opened my door.

Suto looked back and pushed me in slightly, "Just get inside."

"Why?" I stopped him and turned, glancing between him and Kyungsoo.

Kai and Kyungsoo jogged down the hallway and neared me with a smile.

"You don't want to talk to them this late, you're tired." Suto urged.

"Let me just see what he needs and then I can go, is that alright?" I asked.

The features Suto gave off were ones of evasion and hesitancy.

He doesn't seem to like them...

"Alright, I'll translate for you." He sighed and turned toward the boys.

"Hello." Kyungsoo smiled.

"Hi." I smiled back.

He asked Suto something in Korean and he nodded, turning to me to translate.

"He asked if you were going to be living here."

"Yes." I spoke what little Korean words I knew.

"You know Korean?" Suto asked in shock.

"Not much." I indicated 'a little' with my index finger and thumb.

Kai looked at me intently then asked something.

"He's asking if you are in a group or solo." Suto spoke slowly.

"Solo for right now." I nodded.

I felt my body getting weaker by the minute. They both smiled at me.

"Tell them I'm going to sleep, if they need me for anything contact Moa and I'll see them at training." I nodded to Suto.

He nodded back and translated. They both spoke something to him, then bowed and left, looking back several times.

"They said they will support you at training and hope to learn many things from you." Suto smiled.

"Alright."

"Goodnight."

"Yes, goodnight." I bowed to him and slipped into my room, closing the door behind me.

I sighed and looked around,  something bright on my table caught my attention. I looked around as if someone else was there. I slowly put my purse down and took my shoes off, my eyes glued to the yellow box. I walked over to the table and looked at the card on top. I gently lifted it open and read the fine print.

"Hello, we don't know your name yet, but we asked SM to give this to you. We had to use Google Translate to write this, but as long as you get the message it's fine. We hope you can be talking with us and having fun at SM, we all support you! From, Luhan and Sehun from EXO."

I stared at the handwriting for a moment and read it several times over. The thought that either of those boys wrote this made my heart flutter. Luhan with his small and gentle features, his nickname being baby deer. Then there's Sehun, the mysterious lovely boy that has a smile that gives you goose bumps. I smiled and just touched the page, imagining them touching it. I looked at the yellow box and flipped it over, looking at the front. I smiled when I saw the title and what it was for. It was a Rossetta Stone for Korean.

"Thank you." I smiled and the box a little before setting it back down.

It was almost nine at night and I knew I was going to be doing things tomorrow. I got into my pajamas and I laid in bed for a while, hoping to fall asleep. My body was still used to Michigan time, and it felt like I was supposed to be waking up right now, not going to bed. I sighed and closed my eyes. I had read many things about how to fall asleep. One site even said that if you laid still for 15 minutes straight you would fall asleep. I tried out this theory and immediately fell asleep before it even hit 2 minutes.

     *  *  *   

"RACHEL!!! Wake up!" I heard Suto's voice echo through my apartment.

I groaned and sat up, my eyes trying to adjust to the bright lights outside. I looked at the small alarm clock they gave me; it was 9:30am. I yawned and rolled out of bed. I walked out of my room and looked at the fully dressed Suto and Moa.

"We are taking a relaxing day to go shopping today." Moa smiled to me.

"Alright." I yawned again.

"Can you get dressed for me?" Moa asked as she realized my tired state.

"Yeah, just give me a sec." I mumbled and went back into my room.

I went into my suitcase and took out a pair of skinny jeans and a grey sweater to go over them. I got dressed and placed a different beanie on. I put my neon orange converse on and left my room, coming out to use the bathroom. It took me several minutes, but I was ready in no time and fully awake. The three of us left the building and headed out shopping.

     *  *  *    

After several hours of buying male and female clothing we bought some dinner. We ate slowly and conversed happily. We headed back to SM and went to my room. Moa told me to get a lot of rest because I would be physically exhausted after tomorrow. I took out my new male pajamas and placed them on the sink in the bathroom. I took a quick shower and got into the extremely large pajamas. Moa told me to get big sizes to hide my chest and curves.

Not like I have anything anyways…

I kept thinking about tomorrow while I dried my hair. I left the bathroom as my hand slowly rubbed the towel across my scalp. I stared at the Rossetta Stone box, thinking back on yesterday. I smiled and heard an unfamiliar sound echo through my apartment.

Was that my doorbell?

I went to my door and slowly opened it. My breath catching as I saw Luhan, Sehun, and Kris standing on the other side.

Sehun gave a sigh of relief and Luhan waved. I smiled and hid my body behind the door, feeling exposed.

“Hi!” Luhan bowed.

“Hello.” I smiled and bowed back.

Luhan looked to Kris and nudged him.

“Hello my name is Kris.” He smiled and bowed to me.

“Hi Kris.” I smiled.

“They brought me to translate.” He sighed.

“Sorry to trouble you, I’ll learn Korean quickly so you won’t be bothered with such tasks.” I spoke seriously and stepped out from behind the door.

His eyes widened, “No, it’s alright.”

Sehun said something in Korean and Kris quietly listened.

“He asked if you got their present.” He looked at me in confusion.

I laughed a little, “Tell him I did and thank you.”

Kris spoke to them and they smiled. Luhan reached forward and grasped my hands in his, making them warm. Luhan said something and Kris nodded.

“He wants to know if you liked it.”

“Yes I did, it will be very helpful.” I smiled.

Kris relayed the message and something caught my attention down the hallway. Lay and Kai were talking and heading this way.

I’m already breaking the rules talking to them… I should go.

“Well I must go to sleep, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

I said quickly and pulled my hands out of Luhan’s. His features drooped as he watched me retreat into my apartment. I bowed and closed the door, locking it. I released a rush of air and slowly went into my room. I stood there a moment and grabbed my wet hair in a fist.

What am I thinking? I'm acting like a love struck teenager!

I laid down and let the soft piano radio lull me to sleep.

 

Suto came and woke me again the next morning.

"Wear your baggy male clothes!" He yelled on the other side of the door as I got dressed.

"I will!" I yelled back and balanced against the wall while I pulled on my pants.

"We have a meal out here once you're ready." Moa spoke mildly.

"Thank you!" I yelled as I slipped on a 'Legend of Zelda' shirt.

I put my new white Converse on and hurried out of my room. Moa was sitting at my table reading a magazine. Suto was pacing by the door. I rushed over to Moa and looked at my meal. A small bowl of rice was sitting in the middle of several bowls of eggs and vegetables. I grabbed the chopsticks and began eating calmly. It was my first time eating rice with my breakfast, but it was suprisingly pleasant. I finished it and felt full to the point of bursting.

"You ready?" Moa smiled.

"Yes ma'am." I saluted her as I grabbed my shoulder bag.

We went to a part of the building I didn't recognize. We entered the room and I saw several groups I knew and a few I didn't. Moa showed me where to put my things and she taught me a few Korean words. Moa and Suto weren't allowed to stay and had to leave me by myself.

Nooo... Come back!

My mind was spinning and my gut churning. I stood there and looked at my shoes, clicking them together in boredom. I looked up and sighed, looking around. I looked to my left and saw Chen from EXO standing next to me, a smile on his face.

"Hello."  I spoke in Korean, trying to remember what Moa taught me.

He laughed a little and looked over at the groups.

"Kris!" He yelled.

A tall head popped up in the groups of people and slowly made its way over to us. Kris saw me and smiled, approaching happily.

"Nice to see you again." He laughed.

"Nice to see you too." I smiled.

I'm surprised they don't ask my gender, I must sound like a girl... right?

"Are you excited to work with everyone today?" He asked.

"I'm more nervous than anything else." I mumbled.

"Don't be nervous, you have Luhan and Sehun to back you up, they are the chillest guys in here." Kris chuckled to himself.

"That's good." I nodded.

Chen said something to Kris and he began laughing. I stood there silently and felt like they were laughing about me.

"He asked if you were really a boy." Kris smiled.

"Oh... I see." I smiled.

"So... are you?" Kris cocked his head sideways and asked.

"Ummm... The boss says I am." I replied slowly, choosing my words carefully.

"So your gender is unknown to us?" Kris asked.

"Yes." I nodded.

Kris turned to Chen and explained it to him, and his face changed from curiosity to satisfaction. Chen placed his arm around my shoulders and held me closely. He spoke something and Kris smirked a little.

"His exact words were, 'What is your name Mr. Ma'am?'" Kris laughed as he said it.

I was shocked by the statement but it made me happy to still be in a conversation.

"I don't know what they're going to call me." I told him honestly.

"What was your name in America?" He asked, still trying to get an answer out of me.

"If I say it you will know what gender I am and the boss doesn't want that." I smirked to him.

"What is a name I can call you that won't give away your gender?" He probed.

I thought on it for moment, "How about the name my dog is?" I asked.

"Sure."

"Her name is Fawn, so go ahead and call me that. Her nickname was Fawnie, so you may call me either." I smiled.

"Fawnie... I like it." Kris smiled brightly and turned to Chen, explaining in Korean.

For several minutes we tried to show him how to say Fawnie and it took him a while, but he finally got it. Kai and Kyungsoo came over to our laughing group and smiled. I watched Kyungsoo stare at Chen's arm and slowly gain a scowl. He reached forward and removed his hand, making my shoulders open and bare. Chen asked him a question in an almost angry manner and Kyungsoo responded calmly. I stood there in confusion and listened to the gibberish.

"Need talk you." Kai whispered to me and pulled me away from the group.

No one noticed as Kai and I went to the fridge.

"I'm sorry, I don't speak Korean." I spoke slowly, hoping he would get it.

"That no matter." He nodded.

He's being so serious...

"Are you alright?" I asked noticing him shifting from foot to foot.

He nervously looked around then asked for my ear. I slowly approached him and turned my head. I felt the side of his hand touch my cheek.

"I know you girl." He whispered, his breath tickling my ear.

"How?" I mumbled.

He chuckled, "You too beautiful for guy."

My heart rate sped uncontrollably and my breath caught.

Did he really just call me beautiful?

I pulled back and looked at him. He smiled and looked over to our intended instructor. By some unseen sign, the instructor looked over at us and saw Kai beckon him over. The instructor looked to be in his mid 30's and had a head of curly black hair. His slim face hidden behind large glasses.

"Hello." He bowed and smiled to us.

Kai spoke to him in Korean for a moment and I stood there awkwardly, not wanting to move. I looked around for a moment and then felt Kai nudge me. I turned back and bowed to the instructor as he left.

"What did you tell him?" I asked.

"You train with EXO." He smiled awkwardly.

"What about my manager, does she know?" I asked.

"He call her."

"I see..." I thought on it for a moment, bowing to Kai, "Thank you for having me."

Kai patted my head and had me look up, "No problem."

We went back over to the group and Kyungsoo turned and looked at me, watching me approach everyone. This time EXO was heading into a different room. I watched them go and I looked back, confused where I was supposed to go.

"Follow." Kai mumbled and grabbed my hand, pulling me along.

I hurried behind him and followed them through a narrow hallway to another room. Kai's hand was ever so present in my fingers, its warmth making my heart flutter. We entered the room and his hand released mine and I looked down at it absently, waiting for it to become cold. Suddenly someone was standing before me, surprising me. I looked up and saw Luhan smiling at me.

"Hi."

"Hello." I smiled and waved to him.

"You dance with us?" He asked.

"That's what I was told."

"This be fun day." He laughed and patted my shoulder.

"Fawnie, come, follow." Chen smiled and beckoned me over.

I smiled to Luhan and gave a small bow before rushing over to him.

"Hello." I smiled to him.

"Kai and Lay dance teacher." He nodded to them.

I looked to the front of the room and saw Kai and Lay standing in front of everyone, talking.

"Alright."

"Kai want talk to you." Chen's English was on the shaky side but I could tell he was trying.

"Alright." I smiled and nodded to him gratefully.

I slowly approached Kai and Lay, trying not to make eye contact.

"Fawnie."  Kai mumbled and smiled, grabbing my hand and bringing me closer.

He placed me in front of Lay and spoke in Korean.

"Thank you being here, I am Lay from EXO." Lay bowed to me.

"Thank you for having me, my name is Fawnie." I bowed back.

"We going to teach you today." He nodded.

"Alright."

"But first introduce you to EXO." He smiled.

"Huh?" I felt my back straighten and my eyes widen.

Lay and Kai both held one of my shoulders and spun me to face everyone. Kai yelled something and I watched him get everyone's attention.

Do I really have to do this in front of my dream band?!

Everyone slowly gathered into a line and stood before us. I recognized everyone and watched them stare at me with curious or happy eyes. Kai spoke some things and pointed at me. A thought occurred to me and I leaned toward him.

"Don't tell them my gender please." I whispered to him.

He nodded and smiled to me then went on to continue his speech. He nudged me and nodded toward the group.

"H-Hello, my name is Fawnie and I am hoping to work with you." I bowed.

I straightened and saw everyone nodding in approval or smiling.

"Hello, my name is Kai." Kai bowed to me.

I bowed back.

"Hello my name is Lay." Lay smirked and bowed.

I returned the bow and turned back to look at the men. The first person on the left was Luhan and he smiled and stepped forward.

"Hi, my name is Luhan." He bowed happily.

"Hi." I smiled and bowed.

The next person was Chen and he was smirking to me and had his arms folded.

I feel like he will be trouble.

He introduced himself and bowed. Next was Sehun, who introduced himself plainly and bowed gently.

Kyungsoo bowed and gave me his stage name, D.O, I could've sworn I saw him give a small smile when he bent over.

Kris was next and instead of bending over he nodded his head.

After that was Xiumin, Tao, Suho, Chanyeol, and Beakhyun.

The 12 boys bowed all together at the end. I looked at them and smiled out of not knowing what to do. Kai clapped his hands and made me jump; everyone getting into position of a dance. I recognized the dance as the one I performed at my High School's talent show. The song was called 'Wolf' and the dance involved two groups of six people and at the end they all conjoined to make twelve.

Lay directed me to stand behind the camera and video tape them dancing, that way they can see their mistakes and fix them.

I know this dance...

I stood behind the camera and gave them a cue when I hit record and started the song. As they began I didn't feel any shame dancing with them from behind the camera. The second group of six watched me as I hit all the moves perfectly. I looked over and saw Kyungsoo smiling at me. My heart fluttered and I looked away as I felt my face heat. I continued dancing and even began giggling when the first group looked at me with wide eyes as they started messing up their dance. After they all finished their dance they clapped and waited for my cue on the next dance. I hit play and I knew the dance to this song as well. During my Junior and Senior year in High School I learned all of their dances and practiced to be good at singing and dancing, like them. They were my inspiration and I somehow felt happy showing them what I've learned. By the time they had gone through every single dance it was 2pm. My body still wasn't used to the time change and in the U.S it would be midnight. I yawned and clapped when they finished.

"You good at dance." Luhan laughed.

"Why you know our dance?" Beakhyun asked skeptically.

"I learned it for a talent show and because you were my favorite band." I explained.

"That's very nice of you." Kris smiled.

"You tired?" Chen asked.

"A little, in the U.S it would be midnight right now, so I'm slightly tired." I chuckled nervously.

"Ahhhh..." They all nodded as if they got it.

"Why don't you join us dance?" Sehun offered.

"It's alright, I don't want to intrude." I shook my head.

"Please." Kyungsoo asked and gave his award winning smile.

When you ask...

I sighed, "Only for a little bit, if you are alright with it." I bowed my head sheepishly.

"We asking, dance with us." Tao smiled.

"Alright..."

"Let's do Wolf." Kris suggested.

"Alright." They all nodded.

"Who do you normally follow?" Kris asked.

"In the first half I follow Sehun, then in the second half I follow D.O." I laughed nervously.

"Why you follow them?" Luhan looked sad.

"Because my friends chose everyone else before I could." I explained.

"Boo." Luhan sighed.

He's acting very childish.

"Alright, D.O, Sehun, you two should sit out." Kris told them.

They both nodded and immediately went over and plopped onto the couch. The action made me giggle slightly.

"Fawnie, you will fill in for them." Kris smiled.

Everyone approved of the plan and began chatting merrily. Kai yelled something and everyone went into position for the beginning tree. I nervously took Sehun's spot in the front.

I practiced this dance for months, I know it by heart.

I took in a deep breath and lifted my arms to make the tree. The music began and I felt my mind go blank and my body join into the motion. The beat echoed in my ears and my arms swayed with the tree. I opened my eyes and found the boys in front of me smiling. I took in a deep breath and hummed along with everything, jumping into motion when it was supposed to be Sehun's solo. I did all the steps in sync and slid into place when needed. Within minutes the song was over and I stood, happy I could dance. I got several pats on the back and members telling me I did well. I smiled and bowed, turning to bow to everyone. My familiar ringtone began going off and I hurried to my phone. I felt everyone watching me as I looked to see who was calling.

It's Moa...

I answered and turned my back from everyone, "Hello?"

"Where are you? We came back to the room and I don't see you." She sounded almost in a panic.

"EXO asked to personally train with me, I'm in the next room over... was that alright? I didn't want to say no, but then again I didn't really get a choice..." I mumbled.

"That's fine, do any of them know your gender?" She asked skeptically.

"Kai does and they asked for my name, so I gave them a fake name."

"What is it?"

"My dogs name, Fawnie." I replied, slightly embarrassed.

"That's alright, a little girly, but I can figure something out." Moa sounded relieved.

"Do you want me to gather my things?" I asked.

"Yes, I'll be in your room in a sec." She hung up.

I felt my heart race as if I was doing something wrong. I hurried over to my bag and swung it over my shoulder. The moment I straightened the door opened and Moa came in slowly, immediately looking to me. I bowed my head to her and hurried over, turning to all the boys who had blank looks. Moa spoke to them in Korean and then looked around before turning to me.

"Let's go." She smiled and nodded toward the door.

I bowed to the boys and smiled before turning to head out.

"Wait." Kyungsoo spoke loudly, halting my actions.

I turned and Moa was also facing him, saying something in Korean to him. He came forward and spoke to her about something I felt like I would never know about. Moa nodded along and listened to his rapid words. I saw the boys behind him smiling a little and nodding along. After what seemed like forever he finished and Moa nodded, said a few short words and then ushered me out without another word.

We arrived at my apartment and Moa sat me down at the kitchen table and sat across from me.

What's going on?

Suto stood next to her and she turned to him.

"Leave the room, Suto." Moa spoke forcefully.

"Yes ma'am." He reluctantly headed out into the hall.

I felt my spirits shrinking as Suto's presence disappeared. Moa turned to me with a determined and serious look.

"I have some news for you, it might be shocking and odd, but it is what boss has decided." She spoke gravely.

Are they sending me home?

I felt my throat and chest tighten as I waited for her next words.

"As a personal request, you will now have two roommates. These two roommates were chosen by boss and they are only going to be here to help teach you the makings of becoming an idol." She explained.

Two roommates?

"Alright... Who are they?" I asked.

She looked down and smiled a little.

"Kai and Kyungsoo from EXO were chosen after their personal requests." She explained.

"I don't know how that's going to work... I'm a girl, and they are two boys." I mumbled.

"I know..." She sighed, "I tried talking the boss out of it, but he thought it would prove to be a good experience."

"Then... did he tell them that I'm a girl?" I mumbled.

"I honestly don't know, but apparently they are moving in today." She sighed.

"Wow... is this why you asked Suto to leave the room?" I asked, knowing how he would've reacted.

"Yeah, he has a temper for other male performers." She pinched the bridge of her nose.

"Do you know why?" I asked quietly as if he could hear us.

"No, it must involve something we shouldn't ask about." She nodded to me sadly.

"Alright..." I looked down at my hands.

"I'm going to stay in here with you until they get here, in the meantime you should make sure your room and bathroom are clean."

"Right!" I stood and saluted her, before rushing off.

I began cleaning the small amount of a mess I made while I had been living there and I officially unpacked my suitcase and hung everything in the small closet. I placed my empty suitcase on the top shelf, my arms barely long enough.  I looked over at my desk and saw a picture of Kyung and Kai and a picture of Montana and I. I smiled faintly and left the room, heading to my bathroom. I cleaned up my toothbrush and cologne, making the counter open. I gave a heavy sigh and went into the kitchen, going to wait with Moa. I found her looking at something on her phone, not paying any attention to me moving around.

I'm hungry...

I went into the kitchen and opened the fridge, looking for something to eat or make. There were several vegetables and a jar of creamy sauce. I pulled the vegetables out and looked around for a cutting board. I looked next to the knife block and found a green recycled cutting board, brand new. I pulled it out and put the vegetables on it, placing a knife next to them. I looked over at Moa, seeing if any of the noise I made caught her attention. She still had her eyes glued to her phone. I sighed and chopped up the veggies, making them a comfortable size. After soaking them in soy sauce and the creamy sauce I felt even more hungry. The meal smelled delicious and I turned off the burner as the rice timer went off. I pulled out a bowl and plate, setting everything down to eat. I sat across from Moa and munched on my meal, watching her. She took in a deep breath and her finger stopped scrolling. Her whole being froze and she looked up at me.

"When did you make that?" She asked, surprised I was there.

"A couple minutes ago, would you like some?" I asked with a smirk.

"Sure... It smells delicious." She smiled as I stood to grab her a bowl.

I placed the meal in front of her and watched her inhale slowly and smile. I learned to cook from my mother and so it made me happy to hear Moa thinking it was good. My mother had always told me I needed to know how to cook in order to impress the guy I liked. I always ate ramen so my cooking skills were lacking. But the rare times I made an on the spot invented meal my mother praised me and said it was delicious. I sighed and finished my meal, feeling full. Once Moa had cleared her plate I took the dishes into the kitchen and cleaned them. As I was drying my hands the doorbell rang and I felt my heart beat increase.

Is this really happening?!

I took in a deep breath and went over to the door, Moa behind me. I looked to her and she nodded, her eyes being completely serious. I took in a deep breath and reached to the handle. It's gold handle was cold against my hand and I felt as though my senses were heightened in that moment. I twisted the door handle and slowly pulled the squeaking door open. I poked my head between the crack and tried to calm my shaky breath. Kyungsoo and Kai stood on the other side, their eyes immediately shifting to my head. Their hands were full with bags and Luhan and Sehun were behind them carrying two more bags.

"Hi." I mumbled.

"Were you told?" Kyungsoo asked.

"Yeah, come on in." I opened the door and moved my shoes to the corner of the shoe area.

I nervously held the door open and watched them walk in, taking their shoes off neatly by the door. Once everyone was in I closed the door and sighed. They all looked to me, waiting for me to go inside.

"Oh..." I mumbled, hurrying into the kitchen.

Moa was sitting at the table on her phone again, not paying attention. I looked to the extra room they gave me and pointed unsurely.

"That our room?" Kyungsoo asked.

"Yeah, only if you want, I can always move if you like my room better." I hurried to suggest.

"No, it's fine." He smiled.

His pronunciation is perfect...

I watched their receding backs as the four of them headed into the room on the main floor. I turned to Moa and saw her looking to me.

"Boss has just called for me, I need to go." She stood and gathered her things.

"You're going to leave me alone with them?!" I whispered loudly as I grabbed her arm.

"I'm sorry, I must report to boss." She nodded and hurried out the door.

I whined a little, "Really?!"

I then proceeded to growl to myself.

"Everything okay?" Sehun asked from right behind me.

"Oh!" I jumped and fell over, "You scared me..." I mumbled and stood up, brushing my off.

He smiled and chuckled a little, "Then you ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." I smiled back and scratched behind my head.

"You happy?" He asked seriously.

The question took me by surprise, "Yeah, I'm happy, I met all of these wonderful people and am getting the chance of a lifetime..." I named off the first things I thought made me happy.

"No, you no answer question," He shook his head and placed a hand on my shoulder, "You happy?" He looked at me with a deep emotion in his eyes that made me feel comfortable and at home.

I felt my legs weaken and my eyes begin to water, my body began rocking back and forth. I looked down at my shaking hands and I've never seen them so red. I chuckled a little and gave a shaky laugh. I wiped my tears and buried my face in my hands. I felt a strong hand grasp my shoulder and start pulling me. I removed my hands and saw the door approaching quickly. I looked up and saw Sehun hurrying to get me outside. He opened the door and pointed to the shoes.

"Mine are over here..." I headed to my shoes.

"Just slip on." He pointed to the shoes I saw Kyungsoo take off earlier.

"But these are..." I sniffled, my tears coming even faster.

"Put on!" He whispered quickly.

I slipped my feet into Kyungsoo's shoes and still felt the warmth of his feet from earlier lingering in their soles. I hurried out the door, surprised that Kyungsoo and I had about the same foot size. Sehun yelled something into the apartment before closing the door and taking me by the wrist down the hallway. He was leading me somewhere I hadn't been before. Down this hallway was covered in signs saying to go the other way.

"I don't think we are supposed to-" I began looking at the signs with blurry eyes.

"No it ok." He kept pushing me.

The hallway led to a door that had the sign 'closed' on it. Sehun gave me the 'silent' sign by pressing a thin finger to his lips. He opened the door and slinked it, taking me with him. The soft sound of a waterfall echoed in the dark room. Sehun a light switch and everything was cast in a soft angel like glow. In the small room was a garden of bamboo and several flowers.

I slowly walked forward, feeling drawn to the tree's. The small group I neared was next to a waterfall on a rock. The water cascaded down the rock and softly pattered into the moss below.  The grey rock had become blackened from the water's constant trickle. I placed my fingers on the blackened and wet surface. The water was cold as it hit my fingers and the rock slippery. I softly glided my fingers down with the current as if the water was strong enough to push me away. I pulled away when my fingers fell from the rough stone. I looked to the tree's and felt a soft kindness radiating off of their soft leaves. I reached up and touched them, gently rubbing them between my fingers. I glided my hand up the bamboo's stalk, the texture rough and smooth at the same time. My tears welled and slide down my cheeks, feeling like acid as they burned. My knee's weakened and my head became heavy. I leaned and eventually sat on the stone bench that sat next to the tree's. I felt my shoulders shake as the tears came out in a coughing manner. I was openly sobbing and somehow I felt completely comfortable doing it in this room. I felt Sehun hovering over me, but I dared not look up.

He probably doesn't know what to do...

I sniffled and tried to hold it in. I wiped my tears and tried to dry my face as much as possible. Sehun took a seat next to me and sighed.

"Talk make feel better." He mumbled.

I looked over at him with glossy eyes, "A-Alright... I don't even know where to start."

"Beginning." He smiled to me.

"Well... when I was being recruited I was on vacation with my best friend, her name is Montana and the two of us have lived together for three years now. I was in my last year of college, about to get my degree in translation." I explained and then looked over at him to see if he understood.

"Translation?" He asked.

"Yeah, I was to be a Korean to English translator and a Chinese to English translator. All that was left was to learn the languages."

"I see, then you miss school?" He asked.

"Not really, my school was pretty boring, nothing fun ever happened and my teachers were all the type to almost put themselves to sleep while giving a lecture." I chuckled a little.

"I know people that way." He smiled along with me.

"Well after meeting Moa and finding out the day I was coming I basically told myself I had to be in a perfect mood, no crying if it got too tough, no complaining when I was too tired. I kept a shield of armor around my emotions, containing them." I sniffled.

"Then what make you sad now?" He asked.

"I miss my home, I love it here, it's great, but I miss my cat's and I miss Montana and I miss the occasional visits my mom would make to complain to me about how dirty my apartment was." I laughed to myself.

"You have pets?" He asked.

"Yeah, their names are Kai and Kyung, two Siamese cats." I smiled.

"Why not bring them?" He wondered.

"Didn't have enough time." I sighed.

"Next time." He patted my shoulder.

He knows just what to say to calm me down...

 I sighed and stood, taking in a deep breath of air, "We should probably head back." I smiled down to him.

"Right, you come here any time." He smiled kindly to me as he stood.

"Thank you." I bowed to him.

He stood there a moment and awkwardly patted my head. I knew affection was not a Korean strong suit, so I smiled to the kindness he had already given me. I followed him out of the room and back to my room.

"What you favorite drink?" He asked.

"For cold drinks I like Coca-Cola or Water, for hot drinks I like Chai Latte and Mocha Latte but I've always wanted to try Boba Tea." I smiled.

"I bring you some later." He smiled and patted my head again.

"Thank you." I smiled and bowed again.

He waved and headed off down the hall, leaving me outside my room. I sighed and took the key out of my pocket. I unlocked the door and slipped inside, not hearing a sound. I quietly slipped Kyungsoo's shoes off and placed them neatly where I had thought they were before. I looked at the time on my phone and saw that it had become 7pm. I didn't know their sleep schedules so I walked on the edge of my feet, trying to stay quiet. I made a squeak and it made my whole body freeze. I crinkled my nose, waiting for someone to make a noise. The  whole space was quiet and nothing else was heard. I looked around and saw no one. Even though I couldn't hear or sense anyone, I still crept up the stairs. I slid into my room and closed the door behind me. I slid to the floor and sat there a moment, listening to my breathing.

What am I doing? What happened to those promises you made yourself?

I sighed and banged my head against the door roughly.

"I'm such an idiot, I can't do this half assed." I growled to myself and immediately stood.

I went over to my desk and opened my laptop, opening its disc slot. I set the Rosetta Stone CD in and plugged my headphones in. As I listened and spoke along I grabbed a piece of paper and began writing down lyrics to a song I was silently humming. I felt my mind flowing into my pen and everything I had been thinking sketching onto the paper. I finished the first 30 minute course and realized I hadn't been paying much attention. I sighed and took my headphones out. I looked over the small song I just wrote. Words were sitting gently below some notes and the song seemed kind. I read through it several times and figured out that the song was about Sehun. I smiled down at it and gently scrawled his name in dark ink at the top. I slid the song in a empty slot on my desk. I turned off my computer and plugged my phone in for the night. I slowly slumped over and sat on my bed, placing my elbows between my knees. I stared at the pictures on my desk, wondering if they were as lonely as I was. A soft knock tapped on my door.

"Come in." I mumbled, still sitting on my bed.

The door slowly creaked open and I turned to see Luhan.

"Where Sehun?" He asked calmly.

"He already headed back to his room." I smiled to him and stood.

"Alright..." He lingered there a moment and looked around my clean room, taking in everything.

I looked with him to see if there was anything interesting. I looked back and saw that his eyes had settled on the pictures on my desk.

"From back home." I chuckled.

"They nice." He smiled.

"Well I'm going to retire for the evening. Thank you for everything Luhan." I smiled sweetly to him and got up to bow.

As I straightened I saw him smile and raise a soft hand to my face. I squinted out of habit and felt his warm hand gently pat my cheek.

"Sleep well." He smiled and waved to me before prancing away.

"You too..." I mumbled and placed a hand where his fingers just were.

I turned and went back into my room, closing the door behind me gently. I turned out the light and laid down in bed, taking in the warmth of the mattress.

They are so kind to me here, I can't be looking sad!

I nodded to myself in an encouraging way and closed my eyes, going to sleep.