-recap-

And Gerald tucked Kim’s hair that was falling on her face and kissed her forehead.

Gerald: I love you Kimmy. Before, Now and Forever.

Right then, Gerald closed his eyes and fell soundly asleep.

On the floor, Gerald was sleeping in a sitting position with his back against a wall and with Kim soundly asleep on his lap.

It was definitely a night of memories, happiness and love but once they get back would they ever experience these again or would they stay as just memories.

-end of recap-

True to his promise when Kim woke up Gerald was still there. Gerald was still asleep when she woke up and there she looked at Gerald sleeping. She was memorising every curve and line on Gerald’s face. She looked at his foreheaed, his eyes that can make anyone melt from its stare, his gorgeous nose and his lips which are very soft.

Kim: (thinking) Would I still be able to look at your beautiful face after we get back? Will I ever see your eyes that seem like it can see right through me? Will I ever get to kiss those lips again?

With this she remembered the kiss and blushed. But she continued staring at Gerald, she began to trace his eyebrows, his nose and his lips when she felt that her fingers were being kissed she backed away and saw Gerald grinning from ear to ear.

Kim: G-good morning. Gising ka na pala.

Gerald: Good morning din. Yes, I am wide awake. But I’m wondering why you’re touching my lips early in the morning. Are you planning on doing something with them?

Kim: (>////<) o-of course not!

Gerald: Oh Kimmy, you are blushing again. You look so cute.

Gerald was about to pinch Kim’s cheeks but she avoided his touch which wiped the smile away from Gerald’s face.

Kim: Ge…

Gerald: What’s the problem Kimmy?

Kim: Ge, we can’t act like this anymore.

Gerald: Why? We still have time for ourselves.

Kim: Ge, if we prolong this it would only be harder for us.

Gerald: That would be better, it would mean you will not leave me. Then let’s not push through with your plan. Let’s just tell them that we love each other.

Kim: Gerald. You know very well that we can’t.

Gerald: I know, I know. But…

Kim: No more buts Gerald. We should get back.

Gerald: What would be of us once we get back? Will you talk to me? Will you avoid me?

Kim: I don’t know Gerald. I don’t have any plans. I will just go with the flow.

Gerald: It would be really hard Kimmy. I might not be able to ignore my feelings for you. Especially now that I know that you love me too.

Kim: Gerald, I know it will be hard for you but it is also hard on my part. That’s why we need to go back to reality sooner so that it would be less difficult.

Gerald: Kimmy. You know enough that it wouldn’t change anything. Our feelings for each other won’t change. It would still be hard no matter how soon we get back.

Kim: Gerald, please don’t be this difficult. It was the best night I have ever had and I’m more than happy to have spent it with you, to be your girlfriend, and to be able to let you know how I feel was the best feeling ever and I will never forget that feeling. I would always cherish it. But that’s all it could be. Memories.

Gerald: I don’t want that to happen Kimmy. I don’t want last night and today to be just memories. I want them to be reality. I want to relieve them everyday, every hour, every minute and every second of my life.

Kim: Gerald happy memories are better than relieving them but feeling sad because of it. Would you like that? Well I can’t live like that. I can’t live with that kind of guilt in me. If we get together, it would be inevitable that we break up because of the guilt that I feel. We would only be miserable and that is what I’m avoiding, for us to separate with bad memories.

Gerald: But we won’t break up if we do. I would make sure of that. I will do everything so that you won’t feel that guilt.

Kim: Yun na nga Gerald eh. “You”

Pointing a finger at Gerald.

Kim: Lahat ikaw ang gagawa. Lahat aakuin mo.

Gerald: Ano namang masama kung yun ang gagawin ko? Masama ban a gumawa ako ng paraan para magkasama tayo?

Kim: Oo Gerald. Masamang masama. Kasi alam kong mapapagod at mapapagod ka na gawin ang lahat ng yun.

Kim turned her gaze on the floor.

Kim: At pag dumating ang araw na yun magkakasakitan lang tayo. Ayaw kong umabot tayo dun. Mas gusto kong maghiwalay tayo ng ganito.

Gerald: Kimmy…

Kim: Gerald, ito ang gusto ko at sana respetuhin mo na lang.

Kim turned her back on Gerald after what she said.

Gerald: Is that all we can get memories? If so, then those memories would always be in my heart too Kimmy. I would always remember how you told me you love me and the kiss that we shared. I want you to know that I will always love you and you alone.

Kim: Gerald, open your heart to others and I will do the same.

As she was saying this, tears are threathening to fall out of her eyes.

With her back facing Gerald, he tightly hugged her and now tears are falling from their eyes. Gerald broke off first and walked away.

Gerald: We’ll be leaving in a minute. Go down when you’re ready.

And he left leaving Kim standing alone crying.

When she felt like there are no more tears for her to shed, she fixed herself and went down.

When she was at the entrance where the car is she saw no sign of Gerald. She went inside the car and saw that Gerald was already inside.

Their ride back was very quiet. No one dared talk and only the radio was making a sound.

They reached Kim’s house and Kim was about to go down the car when Gerald took hold of her arm.

Kim did not dare turn around to look at him because she knew that she will not be able to hold her tears.

Kim: Gerald, I need to get out of the car.

Gerald: Don’t. Not yet.

Kim: What do you want Gerald? Say it now coz I really want to get some rest.

Gerald: Would this be the end? Just tell me that you want to be with me and I will do it. I will stay by your side to face whatever it is keeping you from being with me. Just say it Kimmy.

Kim: Gerald, let me go.

Gerald: No! I can’t do this Kimmy.

Kim: Gerald. It’s over. We need to let go off each other.

Gerald: Kimmy… Please I love you so much that it hurts not being with you. Please give us a chance. Please let me face the problem with you. Let’s face it together. Please let me love you.

Gerald is crying while begging.

Kim: I love you so much that it hurts. It hurts that I will leave you like this. But we can’t be together. This is for the best.

Finally Kim turned around to look at Gerald who is already crying and she herself is crying as well.

Kim: I’ll always have you in my heart Ge. Nothing and no one can change that. I will always remember the memories that we had. I’ll always remember that once in my life, I was loved by someone like you. Maybe I can’t love anyone the way I loved you but I’ll try. And you should too. You should try to love the person who is willing to fight for your love. Someone strong enough to stick by your side. Someone not like me, a coward. You deserve the best Ge. You deserve someone better than me.

Gerald: How can I do that Kim? How can I love someone else? How can I find someone better than you if you are already the best for me. I’m begging you Kim, don’t leave me. I don’t know what I will do if you’re not in my life. I love you.

Gerald hugged Kim not wanting to ever let her go. Kim took his arm off her.

Kim: I’m sorry if I’m hurting you in this way… Goodbye.

As she said the last word she kissed Gerald lightly and left the car.

Kim was running towards the house and up to her room. There she cried all that she has to cry thinking that it might lessen the pain of leaving Gerald, the one she loves.

She was wrong when she thought it would lessen the pain because nothing could ever take away the pain of leaving Gerald.

On the other hand, Gerald was left inside the car crying. Regreting his decision of letting her leave him again.

Mang Cardo: Gerald, tama na. Pabayaan mo na si Kim.

Gerald: Hindi Mang Cardo. Hindi ko po kayang pabayaan na lang si Kim. Paano na kami? Paano na ako?

Mang Cardo: Mahal mo siya hindi ba?

Gerald: Mahal na mahal Mang Cardo!

Mang Cardo: Yun naman pala eh. Kung mahal mo siya, sundin mo na lang ang gusto niyang mangyari. Tulad nga ng sabi nila sa English. “If you love her, set her free. If you meet again, you’re meant to be.” At sa tagalaog. “Kung kayo, kayo talaga”.

Gerald continued crying so Mang Cardo decided to drive back to Gerald’s house.

Back at Kim’s side, after crying she has decided on something. Something that would change a lot of things.

Kim: I can’t do this here. Maybe it’s time to talk to my parents.

Kim got off her bed and went to their dining area where her parents are.

When Celine saw Kim she rushed to her and hugged her.

Celine: Anak! Oh my Goodness! Saan k aba nanggaling? Pinag alala mo kami ng daddy mo.

Frank: Kim kung may problema ka tell us and don’t run away like that. Paano na lang kung may nangyaring masama sayo? Buti na lang at nakita ka ni Gerald.

When Kim heard Gerald’s name she flinched, but recovered quikly and put on her poker face again.

Kim: Ma, Daddy I agree to lola’s plan.

Celine and Frank were both surprised with Kim’s decision.

Frank: Are you sure? You can say no to your lola if you want. Maiintindihan naman niya kung ayaw mo eh.

Celine: Anak, you need to think this through. This is not something that you can just decide on impulse.

Kim: I have made up my mind. I already thought this through and I am sure of my decision. I accept lola’s offer.

Celine: Bakit naman biglaan yang decision mo anak? Ano bang nangyari? Ano ba ang problema?

Kim: Ma, may mga bagay lang po talaga na mas magandang wag na nating pag-usapan.

Celine was surprised with Kim’s response. She never heard that tone from Kim before. With that, Celine just dropped the subject.

Frank: Kung yan ang gusto mo sige. Pero sasama kami.

Kim: Daddy, ok lang po kung ako lang. Ayaw ko naman pong maapektohan ng desisyon ko ang buhay niyo. Saka po paano na lang po yung business natin ditto.

Celine: Paano ka naman? Walang mag-aalaga sayo dun.

Kim: Lola’s there, I’m sure she would take care of me. And I’m seeing this as an opportunity to learn to live without depending on others. So you don’t need to worry about me.

Celine: Hindi mo naman maalis sa amin ang mag-alala. Pero mukhang desidido ka na at hindi na mababago pa ang isip mo.

Kim nodded.

Frank: If that’s what you want and if that would make you happy then we will support you. I’ll call your lola to tell her about your decision.

Celine: When do you plan on going?

Kim: As soon as possible po kung maari. Kung pwede nga po bukas mas maganda.

Again Celine and Frank were shocked not just because of Kim’s decision but with her expression, something new, something cold.

Celine: Pero anak… Paano ang graduation mo? Paano ang mga kaibigan mo?

Kim: pwede naman po sigurong hindi ako umattend. Kunin na lang po natin sa school yung diploma ko. Iiwanan ko na lang po sila ng message. Siguro magtatampo ang mga yun pero alam ko pong maiintindihan din nila ako.

Frank: Kim, matagal mo ng pinangarap ang grumaduate ng high school excited ka pa ngang umakyat ng stage bakit ngayon hindi ka na aattend?

Kim: Dad, I have my reasons. Now if you would excuse me, I’m going to sleep.

And Kim left for her room.

Celine: Frank, nag-aalala ako sa anak natin.

Frank: Ako rin. Mukhang malaki ang pinagdadaanan niya.

Celine: Oo nga. Bakit ayaw niyang pag-usapan natin ang problema? Bakit kailangan niyang sarilihin? Dati naman kahit na anong problema nasasabi niya sa atin pero ngayon.

Frank: Celine mukhang malaking pagbabago ang mangyayari sa anak natin at wala tayong magagawa kundi ang panoorin na mangyari yun. All we can do is to support her. Balang araw sasabihin niya din sa atin ang dahilan kung bakit niya gusting tanggapin yung offer ng lola niyang pumunta ng California.

…

another sad chapter... sorry guys pero we really need to experience sadness before there is pure happiness hahahaha XP tiwala lang po... :D

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