~Donghae~

I rang the doorbell to Kibum’s house. It only took a few seconds for Kibum to answer the door with a big, white smile on his face. I eyed his smile, it looked way too suspicious and happy for no apparent reason. It was plainly obvious that something had happened and he was probably waiting for me to ask about it. As I came in, I slipped my shoes off and ped my jacket. Kibum shoved his hands into his pants pockets and followed me into the living room where I had set my backpack down.

“Dude, I called you like eight times. Why didn’t you picked up any of my calls?” I asked him, a little annoyed as I fell back onto the sofa. Not that I didn’t enjoy the ride with Hyukjae and his parents, but the fact that he said he’d pick me up whenever if I just called. I didn’t like fake promises.

“My phone’s dead, but it’s charging right now.” He answered. He still had that toothy smile on his face and he sat down next to me, releasing a refreshed breath as he did. I decided to spend some of my time relaxing, so I the TV. I switched the channel to one of my favorite dramas and about half way into it, Kibum finally was ready to tell me about what happened since I didn’t bother to ask. I already knew he’d eventually tell me.

“Hyung,”

“Yeah?”

“I got scouted today.”

“…”

“Donghae?”

“YOU GOT SCOUTED?!” I shouted. The corners of my lips instantly rose and my heart was pounding from disbelief. I grabbed Kibum by the shoulders and started to vigorously shake him back and forth. All he could do was smile, but I knew he was feeling the same thing inside as I was.

“Yeah, scouted – today.” He laughed

“Congrats man!” I cried. “You freaking got scouted, that’s amazing!” I couldn’t contain my excitement. I could barely even sit still. This was huge and so sudden too. This was a big opportunity for him, my best friend – my brother. A scouting agent actually offered a gateway to join, all he has to do is see if he could pass it and BOOM, one step closer to achieving the dream we both dreamed of as kids. It kind of gave me hope that it was possible, that if Kibum could make it into the industry, I could too.

“Tell me everything! What happened? What were you doing? Where were you? What company was the agent from? When are the auditions?”

Kibum looked at me, his eyes glistening from joy. “I was in downtown Seoul, just walking casually, listening to music on my headphones and then before I knew it, a person tapped on my shoulders and offered me their card. It turned out that they were part of the scouting department from Pearl Entertainment–”

“Pearl Entertainment?!?!?!” I accidentally interrupted.

“Yeah, hold on dude, let me finish.”

“Sorry.”

“He said I gave off a good feeling and that he’d like me to audition for their company next Saturday!”

“THIS SATURDAY?!?! You are so going. I’ll kill you if you don’t go.” I threatened him.

“Of course I’m going! I wouldn’t miss this for anything!”

“You better not! Do your parents know about this?”

“Yeah, I called them right when I got scouted. They said ‘Hell yeah!’”

I cracked up. “You’ve got some awesome parents.”

“We’ve got some awesome parents.” He corrected me.

“We?”

“We’re brothers, Donghae. What’s mine is yours – including my parents. You come here so often, you practically live here. You’re like a second son to them – No, you are a second son to them."

“Your parents are… My parents…” For some reason, my voice sounded uneasy like it didn’t sound right.

“Donghae, do you honestly think you can still call ‘those people’ your parents?” Kibum looked at me intensely.

Those people, huh?

This conversation just got from cheerful to serious.

Could I? I did live 12 years with their affection and love. They took care of me until I was old enough to at least manage by myself at home. I still remembered the sacrifices they’ve made, the commitments they’ve held. Those were the years I had a family. Those were the years that were the most nostalgic. But despite all that, what kind of parents stopped loving their own child? Why should I still care about them when they’ve been so insensitive towards me? They don’t care about me. As long as I can meet their expectations – Which I don’t – that’s what they cared about. They exercised control, obedience, and strived for money. Now that I broke free from their order, they have done nothing but despise and discourage me. Yes, it was natural that I rebelled from time to time. Yes, I am sometimes defiant and violent. And yes, I am choosing to walk a different path from what they wanted. Away from the world they created. But I don’t think I ever did anything wrong. It wasn’t a crime to be pursuing my own happiness.

They’re just too ignorant to see the potential, to see the hope, to think optimistically about my future. They’re too narrow-minded. They have absolutely no support in my dreams, just their dreams they have for me. I knew they wanted me to have an occupation that would ensure me of a successful path of making money, but what was so hard for them to accept?

If I could still be successful and make money as an actor, wouldn’t they be happy? Will they give up on their imaginary Donghae they dreamed of having?  

So many things were going on in my head, I couldn’t think clearly. My head was fighting with my heart, but I couldn’t even figure out what it was my heart wanted. Maybe it was what everyone else had or maybe it was to let go of what I had. I just wanted it to stop hurting.

I leaned my head back, clearing my mind of everything. It was starting to hurt from all the confusion I was jamming into it. I still hadn’t answered the question. Yes or no? Were they still my parents? Should they still be my parents? Those questions were the most haunting.

“I guess I want to say they’re still my parents, but those are just my desires talking.”

Kibum placed a hand on my knee. He squeezed it a bit to tell me that everything was alright. “We love you very much, Donghae. Remember that we’ll always be there for you.”

I kept my head leaned back, staring at the ceiling. If only my parents could've said those same exact words... What should I do when I return home?

*Sigh* Donghae's parents have really hurt their son...

I know this chapter is short, but there's still more to come! Thank you~