~Donghae~

As I marched angrily out of my house, I stopped myself just before exiting the driveway. A sudden animus idea popped into my mind. An idea that involved doing something reckless, but I was too blinded by anger to think of the consequences. It's not like I cared if my mom hated me even more.

I began to look around, searching for a stone, a large one. After finding one with a decent weight, I held it firmly in my right hand. The weight of it made me smile front the high of destructive intent, and before I knew it, I threw it. I threw it with all my might, at my mom’s car. It hit the car’s windshield and it shattered like thin ice – so fragile, I never knew.

The car alarm sounded. It blasted the whole neighborhood with its wailing sirens. I panicked for a moment and made a mad run for it. I ran and I didn't look back. A feeling of disbelief washed over me. I actually did it, I thought. I actually broke the car’s windshield and my mom was probably now discovering what had happened.

I kept on running, running until my lungs burned and legs ached. I felt alive and rebellious. The damage to the car wasn’t anything compared to how damaged I felt, but it was something – a message, a sign. It was my last straw. As the feeling of hysteria wore down, I realized that I was already a far distance away from my house. Far enough to where my mom wouldn't look for me – Not like she would even go out looking for me anyway. I wanted to get as far as possible. Despite letting off some steam, a resentful feeling still lingered in my stomach. I had no plans on apologizing to my mom. She probably wouldn’t forgive me anyway. Not after what I just did.

My relationship with my parents has already gotten to this point, and the worst part is that there’s nothing I could do to mend it back together. We couldn’t get along anymore even if we tried. To think that they once loved me with all their hearts and attention, once cared for me, once told me I could achieve anything. It all seemed surreal. It was like it was all a lie now. I couldn’t recall the last time I felt wanted around their presence. When was the last time we laughed together? When was the last time we felt happy to have each other? When was the last time we were a family?

I chuckled sourly when I answered my own thoughts. When Jason came.

The boy who made a better son than me. The boy who was more capable than me. The boy who could reach higher standards than me.

I bit down on my jaw. There I go again, being ridiculously childish and comparing myself with Jason. He did nothing wrong, yet there was this deep sense of jealousy I harbored towards him. The only reason they adopted him was because they wanted another child, but they were both very busy with work at that time, so they went through all the trouble to adopt, Jason – The brilliant boy who captured their hearts. At that moment, I never expected that their love for me was going to change. I had to accept it, but even after all these years, it was still hard. I really did wish it was a nightmare I could wake up from.

Just a nasty nightmare no one should ever dream of.

Still restlessly walking, I grabbed my cellphone out. I dialed the only number I would ever think of calling in times like these.

I waited patiently for that certain person to pick up.

“Hello?”

“Kibum, it’s me, Donghae.”

“Hyung? Hey, wassup?”

“Can I sleep over at your house tonight?”

“Of course you can.”

Usually when I asked Kibum about going or sleeping over at his house, he never questioned why. It never bothered him or his parents whenever I stayed with them or how long. 

“Thanks.”

“No problem, do you need a ride to my house?”

“No, I’m already here.”

“You are?”

Ding Dong~

I hung up the phone and waited at the doorstep. I began to feel nervous since I always ended up spilling my emotions out along with a story of arguments and fights with my parents when I was here. Kibum and his parents always listened and talked it out with me to sort my uncontrollable floods of frustration and violent tendencies. If it weren’t for them I’d end up destroying my entire house and getting us evicted from our home. I’ve already broken a few photo frames, glass cups, vases, and one window. The windshield wiper was the most destructive I’ve been so far and the first time in months.

Kibum, as expected, opened the door for me and welcomed me in. I smelt the fresh scent of dinner being made and it lured me into the kitchen.

“Good evening, Mrs. Kim.” I greeted his mom politely.

“Donghae! What a surprise, what are you doing here might I ask?” She said cheerfully as she stirred the chicken soup.

I released a sad sigh. “Things aren’t going well at home.” I told her.

“Again?” Mrs. Kim said, not sounding surprised. Kibum wasn’t so surprised about it either. I felt his hand rub my back.

“It’s pretty bad.” I said, my gaze dropping down with a pitiful smile.

“Oh sweetie,” Mrs. Kibum cooed. She placed the ladle she was holding down and came over to comfort me. “It must be hard for you.” Her soft, warm hands touched my cheeks and she spoke in a very motherly tone. One I have wanted to hear from my own mother. It was nostalgic. I felt my nose burn up. My cheeks grew hotter and a few tears escaped from my eyes.

Her gentle hands wiped them away. Kibum went and grabbed some tissues and Mrs. Kim used them to properly wipe my tears away. I placed my hand on top of hers.

“Thank you.” I managed to choke out.

She pressed her lips together. “Feel free to stay as long as you like. You’re always welcomed here. I’m sure your parents will calm down soon, they can’t stay mad at you forever.”

“I’m not so sure about that.” I said, avoiding eye contact.

“Donghae,” Kibum said, catching on. “Tell us everything that happened.”

The next morning, I felt so much better. I didn’t care about my parents anymore or what I did to my mom’s car last night. I had confessed everything to Kibum and his family – his dad came home right in the middle of my explanation – and they still stayed on my side, although I got the back of my head smacked from Kibum along with a hard scolding for causing unnecessary commotion again with the car alarm and everything.

I felt grateful to have met Kibum and his parents. His parents were like my very own parents, but I really wished that they were my birth ones. Funny thing, I had my parents to thank for introducing me to Kibum. My parents are good friends with Kibum’s parents, so that’s how we met.

I slept in their guest room the entire night. It was smaller than my room at my house, but I liked it better. Unlike my room, it felt more secure and snug.

I quickly changed out of Kibum’s clothes that I had borrowed and switched back to my school uniform. Unfortunately, my backpack was still at my house. Hopefully it hadn’t been moved from where I placed it to spare me the time to look for it.

“Donghae? You coming to school?” Kibum asked me when he noticed I was walking a different direction.

“Yeah, I’ll be there, but I need to get something. You can go ahead without me.”

Kibum shrugged and proceeded to walk to school. I, on the other hand, began to sprint because I had 15 minutes until school started. I didn’t want to risk being late and have the school send a phone call to my parents about me failing to get to school on time. It would be horrible, and embarrassing.

With not that much time, I ran like how I ran yesterday. I ran for my life. I had finally reached my house and slowly approached the front entrance. Carefully, I turned the door handle.

Click.

Yes, it wasn’t locked.

I opened it, slowly, centimeter by centimeter, being as cautious as possible, but still quick because of time. I peeked in, scanning the proximity. I saw no one. Quietly, I tiptoed in, not bothering to take my shoes off when I walked into the living room. I spotted my backpack and picked it up. Careful to not make any sounds, I swung it over my shoulder.

I suddenly heard footsteps. I tensed up. I tried to find a place to hide, but it was too late. The footsteps didn’t stop. They were getting closer and closer. I felt a hand on my back.

“Hyung? Is that you?”

My body relaxed. It was just Jason.

“You didn’t –”

I turned around to silence him.

“Shhhhh. I know, I wasn’t home last night,” I whispered, just barely audible for him to hear. “Omma and I aren’t getting alone right now. Don’t let them know I stopped by.”

“Sure, but –”

“Jason! Where are you?” My mom called as she came down the stairs.

I froze. Jason and I looked at each other. He pointed at the couch and I quickly hid behind it.

“I’m here, Omma!” Jason answered back. He was aware that I didn’t get along with my parents, but he was oblivious that they used to love me. It would be too much of a burden for him to know that things changed after he became the new addition to our family. So I haven’t told him much about the past. It was all for his sake.

“Ah, there you are my little angel. What would you like for breakfast?” She crooned.

“Gee, Omma. I love everything you cook. You can cook anything you feel like cooking.”

I could hear my mom laugh, she sounded so pleased. “Ah, Jason, my sweet, sweet baby, Omma loves you very much~” She squealed and I assumed that she hugged him because Jason’s voice suddenly became muffled.

“I love you too, Omma. And I love Appa too.”

“Tsk.” Without realizing it, I made a sound. . I held my breath.

“What was that?” My mom said, curious. I heard footsteps coming closer towards the couch.

“O-Omma, I’m really hungry, you know. School is going to start soon. You should probably start making breakfast.”

I heard the footsteps stop. “You’re right, Honey. I’ll start right now.” The footsteps then became distant. I didn’t move from my position until Jason signaled me that it was okay to.

“Thanks, I really appreciate it.” I said to him, breathing again. I was about to leave when he grabbed my wrist.

“Hyung,” He whispered with a hint of worry in his voice. “Will you and Omma make up soon?”

I looked at him. I honestly couldn’t say if we were going to make up. I didn’t really care for forgiveness, but it was up to my mom if she would let it slide or hold a grudge. I found myself lost for words. I couldn’t answer him, I didn’t know how to properly. Instead I gave him a hug, one that felt as if I was saying goodbye for an eternity. When our hug broke apart, I took one last look at him. He looked up at me, with those sad, round eyes of his. I then was on my way to school. It was only a matter of time before the bell rang. With a deep breath, I took off.

I know a lot of you guys were probably expecting Donghae to go and be with Hyukjae, but it seemed unnatural for him to do so. So I tried to follow what would make sense, but that doesn't mean that there won't be a time where Donghae would want to be with Hyukkie. xD Thank you~