'I know you love and adore your brother, but it’s wrong to be IN LOVE with him. You're just upset that your comfort zone is being replaced.’

Key’s words echoed in his head. Sitting on his study chair, arms crossed, Karam grumbled. Each day he had been asking himself the same thing repeatedly. Was it wrong to love your own brother more than you should? Karam realized his kind of love toward his brother was that kind of love. It wasn't anything close to a family love. It’s really …a love. And this love was hurting him. And it hurt him like hell.

"Hyung!"

Karam flinched. 'Just go, baby, if you came here to tell me about that girl again,' he said in a whisper that no human would be able to catch.

"Hyung, I’ve been calling you five hundred times," Changmin said, leaning against the door frame.

Karam lifted his face, his expression neutral as though he were preparing himself for a death blow, and turned to his brother. "Sorry, hyung was so into this book. Almost finished. Just a few more pages.” He lifted the book in his hands.

“Hyung, I’m going out.. I’m seeing HaNa. Remember I told you I have a date with her tonight?”

“You really fell for HaNa, didn't you?" His lips quirked as he struggled to keep his neutral expression.

"Hyung, how many times do you have to ask me this question?" Changmin gave a small smirk at the jealousy in Karam's tone.

"Do you think she’s the one for you, baby?" Karam asked.

"I… I think she is, even if I don't really know for sure," Changmin replied, stuttering. His voice was kind of nervous. He walked into the room and slumped on the couch and crossed his legs.

Karam knew that Changmin always did that when he was nervous. Either he crossed his legs and slumped in his seat, or shoved his hands in his pockets if he was standing.

Karam's heart slammed into his chest harder. He stared at the boy in front of him and raised his brow.  Changmin had grown up. He no longer possessed the young boyish looks he had when he was ten -eleven years old. He grew up to be every bit the man everyone had highly expected of him.

‘Jung Changmin, why do you have to be so handsome... so y?' Karam cleared his throat. "What are you getting all nervous about? If you’re sure, then you should be happy about it."

Changmin just stared back at him not saying anything.

"If she's the one you want…" Karam said, because he had to say it, "then good. Because hyung wants you to be happy." 'I need you to be happy, though it's not with me.'  Karam turned back to his book, his finger and turned the pages of the book rapidly until he reached the last.

Changmin didn't know what to say. A part of him wanted to laugh, and a part of him was...angry? He shook his head. He had no reason to be angry, and laughing at his brother wasn't a good idea. ‘This is the best for us, hyung,’ his mind was telling him. Sometimes, most of the time, it was okay, he didn't think about it, and it was pretty easy to keep a lid on it. And then sometimes it wasn't.

“Hyung, what was with the face?” Changmin questioned, pretending to be clueless.

"Hmm..." Karam barely managed to grunt a response. He didn't even look up from his book.

Changmin walked over to Karam and kissed him softly on the head. When he pulled away, Karam looked up at him and he glanced down nervously into Karam's eyes. Even though it was probably just him thinking that way, his eyes seemed darker. When Karam looked at him like that he just…he couldn't breathe.

'I never thought you'd be the jealous type. There wasn't even a beginning.'  "I love you, hyung," he said, with a little smile on his lips.

Karam grinned. "Yeah." He rolled his eyes while he looked at his brother.

“So, I’ll see you later, Hyung," Changmin said, while walking to the door. He stopped then and pulled back, smiling innocently at Karam.  But for a brief moment as Changmin looked over, he saw Karam’s normally happy, peaceful expression darken with something akin to deep sorrow and…regret?

Karam looked at his brother broodingly a second before looking out the window instead of at his book.

Changmin sighed and he walked back to his brother, placing his palm on his cheek. Karam smiled sadly and rubbed Changmin’s arm as he flashed his brother a quick crooked grin. “Enjoy yourself, baby." He turned back to the window.

After Changmin left the room, Karam sighed heavily as he leaned back in his chair. He hadn't expected the day to go like this. Not at all. To have him so close and yet so far... It irritated him.  He stood up and went to the bathroom and splashed cold water over his face. He gazed up at his own reflection, only to see how pathetic he looked.  He quickly composed himself, and flashed himself a huge smile. But even his reflection in the mirror seemed fake, forced, artificial.

"Come on, Karam. Pull yourself together. For Changmin's sake…" he muttered wearily to himself. 'And for your own sake...' he added silently in his head.

Karam didn’t wait for his brother that night. He didn’t want to think of anything. After he had his dinner, he switched on the television, but after flipping through all the channels, nothing interested him. He went to lie on his bed. He clutched his stomach, clenched his teeth, squeezed his eyes shut tightly. He felt sad that his brother had found a replacement for the comfort that he had been giving to him. He sighed.

‘He’s my brother. He will always be my brother.’ 

It was almost midnight when Karam heard the sound of the next door being opened and closed. 'Changmin must be back from his date.'

The next morning Karam woke up early. He prepared breakfast for his brother. He put a forced smile on his face when Changmin walked into the kitchen.

“How was your date?” Karam asked.

“It was perfect, hyung.” Changmin smiled, clasping his hands together as he moved toward the dining table. He laid his palms on the table and smiled like a kid on Christmas morning. “I took her for dinner on a Han C