"There's a loneliness that happens only in one's mind.The loneliest moment in someone's life is when they are watching their whole world fall apart and all they can do is stare blankly."

11^th Spring.

MinKyeong was always so strong and brave.

As a father of two (almost), I found it so overwhelming that I was going to have a new addition to the family.

We walked down the streets with JunHyun fast asleep on my right shoulder, and my left arm carefully holding MinKyeong at the waist.

For a 37 weeks pregnant lady, she was certainly not in her best shape. Barely walking 200 meters through the park, she nudged me for the nth time that evening to find her a bench so that she could rest. I ushered her to the nearest bench we spotted and there we sat for a good 20 minutes as she massaged her already tired legs.

“I cannot believe we are going to be able to see our angel soon! Who do you think she looks like?”

I smiled at that thought but before I could say anything, Minkyeong answered her own question.

“I hope she looks like me but have your height. Tall girls are attractive. And those huge irresistible eyes. But I don’t think you would look good as a girl.” She teased, her voice tinged with bliss as she rubbed her belly.

I let out a chuckle.  “Oh please, don’t you know, Youngmin and I grew up being mistaken as girls.”

“I don’t think it is something to be proud of Mr. Jo Kwangmin.” She said between a laugh.

“We’ll see.”

“Just one more push!” The doctor’s voice echoed through the room and with clenched teeth, MinKyeong gave one more push and brought our angel into this world, Jo Mi Eun.

Relief and happiness instantly flooded the room and the previously felt pain disappeared from from her face as she cradled our baby in her arms.

I gently dabbed the perspiration off her head as I examined our baby in her arms.

The way her tiny body rests peacefully on Minkyeong’s, eyes shut tightly together. Maybe being a father of two isn’t that stressful after all.

“Looks like me.” I announced proudly as I smiled to myself, breaking the silence.

MinKyeong rolled her eyes at me. “No, she looks like me. Look at those adorable eyes and nice lips,” she cooed as she touched Mi Eun.

“Me. I have those traits too.”

“Oh no, please don’t say she looks like you. I want my daughter to … look like a daughter,” Minkyeong commented inviting explosions of laughter from everyone in the room.

“I’m sorry parents but I have to clean your baby up first and I will bring her back to you in a while. In the meantime, have a good rest, you did a great job. I will invite your family in now if that’s alright with you two.” The nurse said as she placed our Mi Eun in her bed and wheeled her out of the room.

Instantly, I heard squeals and cooing coming from outside the room and I shook my head in amusement.

“Believe it or not, in 3 seconds Young Min is going to barge into the room and say ‘How one earth did-‘,” but before I can continue Minkyeong interrupted me as she counted down.

“3, 2, 1.”

And on cue, Youngmin barged into the room with his son in his arms and exclaimed, “How on earth did such a guy like you have such an adorable baby?! Oh there’s MinKyeong that’s why.”

“Nailed it,” Minkyeong and I eyed each other and gave a small high five. “Told you she looks like me.”

Youngmin never fails to crack us up.

12^th Spring.

The spring I like to think of as the ‘perfect spring’.

Because firstly, my family is complete. I have 2 children and a loving wife.

Secondly, the new album Youngmin and I were working on for the past year finally hit the records.

And lastly, for the first time in the year, I finally had a date with Minkyeong without the kids.

The breeze past through the small space between our interlocked hands. Using my thumb, I grazed the skin of her once delicate hands. It has only been 1 year but somehow I feel like Minkyeong has aged. She was still the same woman I knew her to be but her hands were no longer that soft from all the washing and cleaning and her eyes more tired than usual.

For some reason, I felt a small ache in my heart.

MinKyeong has done so much for the family. But what have I done for her?

Lost in my thoughts, we finally came by the Han River where Minkyeong requested to sit by for a moment.

“Happy anniversary, here’s to many many many more years together,” she mentioned out of the blue, her eyes fixed on the waterworks before us.

A smile crept onto my face. It was probably the best thing I could ever hear, that Minkyeong wants to spend the rest of her life with me and the children. It was probably something many married couples take for granted but hearing it for myself struck me deeply. This is just the beginning of our relationship, of our love.

We are good. Life is good.

Little did I know then that in time to come this will be the very sentence that kills me each day. 

Minkyeong’s face was painted with a pale shade of grey, her eyes bloodshot and her hands clenched into fists as pain flowed through her spine. She opens her lips to say something but nothing but wincing comes out of it.

MinKyeong was a strong woman. She IS a strong woman. The girl who called a sprain ankle an ‘ant bite’ and a migraine a mere fatigue, let out a cry. Hearing her even making a small yelp at anything meant a great deal. She looked at me standing at the far end of the room watching the doctors save her life, a forceful smile pressed on her face as tears rolled down. Finally with determination, she mouthed “I’m okay” before her face scrounges into a picture of pure torture to watch. I couldn’t watch this any further.

I have never seen MinKyeong in this much pain since the birth of our children years ago. Now seeing her in such pain brought different feelings.

In the past, she was in pain but there was happiness that comes with it. There was nothing I could do about the pain but I knew she was going to be okay. I knew everything was going to be over, like nothing ever happened and we would feel nothing but pure bliss.

But right now, it is different. Every single ounce of pain she feels gets to her and destroys her physically.

Destroys me mentally.

Destroys our children emotionally.

And I couldn’t do anything about it.

The worst part was, I didn’t know if she was going to be okay.

A/N: Hey guys this is YooGeum back with another short flashbackchapter. Sorry for keeping you guys waiting. We were really busy but we finally got down to writing a few chapters which we will upload in the next few days. Thanks for being patient with us and for subscribing ! 

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YooGeum