50
Their Kingdom Panorama
After the quick breakfast Victoria had suggested to go for a walk. Indeed, there was no need to head back to the house. She had nothing to do there and for the first time, really, she didn’t want to go back there at all. For a moment she debated about whether she wanted to show Kyuhyun her grandmother’s house that she’d suddenly stopped remodeling.
The small breeze coming from the river beyond the jogging trail swept her hair aside and she turned to look at Kyuhyun as he walked around her to block her from the wind.
“What do you do when you’re sad?” Victoria asked.
Instead of asking her if she was sad he went, “Instead of listening to jumpy music like others do to cheer themselves up, I usually listen to sad songs. It usually helps deprive me of all sad emotions and afterwards I tend to feel better.”
“Really?” she said. “Way before when I was still with my grandmother, I would run out of the house and sit by myself. I didn’t know music could be so moving.”
Kyuhyun slightly pushed her head, “Silly.”
“Tsh…” Victoria muttered then asked, “have you seen your new office yet? You should show me sometime.”
“Not yet, they’re still clearing it out actually, so I won’t be able to see it till Monday.”
“That’s a shame. I was kind of thinking that it’d be a big one.”
Kyuhyun chuckled beside her.
“We should go snack on some donuts after this,” Victoria suggested.
“Why? What’s with you and food today?” he wondered.
“Oh…just because,” Victoria smiled.
Kyuhyun dropped her off back home late in the afternoon and she opened the gate door half stepping in. Turning around she waved at him and watched as his car disappeared into the distance before stepping back out onto the road. Still holding onto the bag of donuts she’d brought back, she started down the street.
/\_____/\
“Sorry for last night. I hope you got home safe,” Donghae frowned at his text and quickly deleted it.
Sighing he set his phone down and rubbed his forehead.
“I hope you didn’t get wet by the rain…” he frowned again at his text and deleted it.
“It’s so shabby,” he commented, “forget it!”
Tossing his phone aside he the TV and purposely blasted the volume in hopes that the noise would drag away his thoughts as well. When a minute passed by he reached for his phone again.
“She’s not one to stay angry, I hope,” he pressed his lips together and started another text before hopelessly deleting it again.
Throwing his head back he stared up into thin air and sighed.
/\_____/\
“No food…but sweets…” Eunhyuk stared at the bag of donuts in the middle of their ring.
“Well…it is something to eat.” Ryeowook helped.
“I want it!” Yesung reached a hand forward for the bag, but Eunhyuk grabbed his hand.
“Where’s the food?” Eunhyuk questioned.
“Sorry, this is all I have today.”
“What do you mean?” Eunhyuk’s face became a contorted frown.
“I’ll make it up to you tomorrow, alright?” Victoria asked.
Eunhyuk scowled at her before snatching the bag, “Only one person can have this.”
Victoria laughed, “Oh come on. I brought back 50 pieces not for just one person.”
Eunhyuk frowned at her again then replaced the bag in the middle of their circle.
“So what’s with you today? Did something happen?” Eunhyuk interrogated as Yesung moved for the donuts.
“Uh…that’s right. Do you know of any good sad songs?” Victoria asked glancing at each one of them.
“Music?” Eunhyuk asked.
“We hear a few on the streets,” Ryeowook added.
“Oh really?” Victoria said.
“But we don’t know their names,” Yesung told. “We just hear them.”
Victoria made a face at them.
“Why don’t you go to the stores and see for yourself,” Eunhyuk suggested.
A few minutes later Victoria found herself walking into a music shop. The air conditioner was really blasting down on her from above. Shaking the cold breeze off she headed toward the headphones in the back and randomly picked it up playing the CD that had been left inside.
The dreamy beat of the drums made her heart quiver before the singer’s voice took over. All that was around her began to fade away. It suddenly felt as if she’d been into a misty dream full of transcendental symbols. Victoria suddenly felt her heart come to a slow stop as her memory took its first trip down memory lane.
Sunday at 1 in the afternoon. The sun was glittering, blinding, and full of heat when she stepped outside.
“Thief!”
“Yah! You! Stop! You rascal!”
Lunging forward she wrapped her arms around him and tackled the stranger to the ground. He struggled uselessly underneath her and swiveled his head around.
She shot her hands forward to take the kimbap away but he hid it away and chewed away at what was in his mouth. Unsure of why he was being so stubborn Victoria grabbed his shoulders and forced him to turn over and sat on top of him.
“Give me that!” she demanded reaching for the kimbap but this time he stuck it in his shirt.
“Why…doesn’t this position turn you on?” he asked with a small smirk.
Victoria glanced down at him and quickly grabbed the collar of his white shirt. “You…” she began when a piercing scream made the birds in the trees fly away.
Donghae and Victoria’s eyes opened wide in shock when a gunshot echoed into the air.
Bang In Tak was murdered.
Then those men had come looking for her…
“We need to go! I need to talk to you!” Victoria suddenly told putting both hands on his frail shoulders.
“Where’d you come from?!” Donghae shouted struggling for his breath. “Why are we running?!”
“They’re…gonna kill us!”
Donghae laughed, “So? What can they do to us now that the necklace isn’t here?”
“Exactly!” Victoria yelped. “They want that necklace!”
“But…they’re only going to kill you, right?” Donghae asked. “I mean since you’re the only one they’ve seen so far.”
Then she’d returned home. Her heart had ached. She hated the cruel world. For a moment she resented the fact that her grandmother had died and left her to be alone. There was no one she knew. No one she could run to. No one to make her feel secure or safe. Practically she was on her own. Friendless. Helpless.
Then she’d woken up at midnight and had been ridiculously kidnapped.
“Yah! Open the door, you jerks!” she screamed pounding on the door with her fists. “I said open the door!”
Donghae just stared at her calmly.
“Why struggle? We’ll get out eventually.”
“Eventually? How long are you willing to wait? Because I want out NOW!” she went on. “Ugh! I can’t stand you. Even the sight of you! How dare you call yourself a man?!”
Then they’d escaped after digging a hole through the dirt underneath the floorboard and they’d escaped through a golden field with hungry stomachs. They finally made it back to the city the next morning.
“Then, Victoria, if you’re ever bored and you’re looking for trouble, I’m just down that way,” he pointed down to the left where the fenced shelter resided.
“My name is Bang So Rae.”
She’d met Donghae there at the company, and her father had discovered her. It’d all flown by so fast Victoria couldn’t get a grasp on reality. Then she’d been introduced to Kyuhyun.
“Cho Kyuhyun…who is he to you?”
His face had such a straight expression that she wasn’t sure how to interpret his question. Angry? Or was he jealous? The thought of it made her anxious and caused her heart to run wild.
“Why?” a silly smirk entered upon her silly face.
“You…don’t like him do you?”
He was definitely jealous. She was sure of it.
He ran his hand through his hair, “Every time I see her so frustrated, so angry…I feel so bad for you and yet you don’t understand a single bit of it? Victoria, I thought you were better than this!”
“What are you talking about?” a million of questioned popped up all over her brain.
“Whenever you pull off that stupid look on your face around Cho Kyuhyun it makes you look dumber each time,” he told.
“Cho Kyuhyun…he shouldn’t be your fiancé.”
A wave of shock infiltrated her.
“Isn’t he…unnie’s fiancé?”
“So Rae’s? Who told you that?” he questioned. “He was So Rae’s first love, her fiancé…before they made him yours.”
“Are you happy?” So Rae asked without looking at her. “That he’d still choose someone he doesn’t know over someone he’s known his entire life?”
“I don’t get it. Why everyone seems to favor you, who doesn’t even fit in.”
“It’s unfair that I’m suddenly pushed into the position of an outcast, which should belong to you.”
It was Donghae and it had been Donghae all over again afterward.
“At least she’s not as awful as you.”
Victoria felt her heart burn and choke up.
“Irritable, feisty, always angry, always shouting, no manners, and you’re never nice,” he pointed out, “So Rae, she needs someone to talk to more than you do. You aren’t even comparable to her.”
Victoria gritted her teeth, “You like her that much?”
“Yes.”
Then she’d confessed.
“Haven’t you noticed that I like you? You idiot.”
“What?”
“Yes, I like you. Is it so hard to believe that these dumb words are actually coming out of my mouth?” she asked.
She hadn’t had a chance to breathe there on after. The divorce, misunderstandings she couldn’t clear out, and the resentment from So Rae began filling her world.
“Who do you think you’re standing up for?” So Rae’s voice became deathly quiet. “I never lacked trust in them…they left me first. They stopped loving me first! You don’t understand family because you’ve never had one! You were an orphan since the beginning!! Who do you think you are to understand me?!!”
“There’s nothing you can do about how she feels toward you and you can’t help it that she feels that way,” Mi Sun said, “it’s best that you just deal with it. So Rae can’t think from another’s point of view, she’s a very narrow minded person. No matter how hurt she makes you feel, you can’t do anything against her. So Rae will be So Rae, so in the end you’re going to have to be the older sister.”
“It’s your birthday,” Victoria restated, “so here’s a gift.”
“Thank you, for the birthday present,” he thanked, “since it was a birthday gift, I’ll accept it. If there’s anything else from you, I don’t think I can accept it.”
“About your feelings, sorry,” he apologized, “I don’t like you that way.”
“Yah…” Victoria said unable to bring that smile onto her face, “I didn’t bring you here for that…”
“I know,” he told, “I just want to clarify with you…”
“Why? That you like unnie?” Victoria asked. “You’re going to tell me that you’re crazily in love with So Rae unnie?”
“Miss?”
Victoria finally turned stunned that she’d suddenly lost her grasp on reality.
“Yes?” Victoria asked.
“Are you ok? You’ve been standing here for a while now…”
She finally realized one of the employees had walked up to her.
“Ah…” Victoria took the headphones off, “sorry, I kind of…tuned out…”
She laughed awkwardly and almost walked away.
“Can I buy this song?”
“The CD?”
Victoria walked home in a daze. For the first time, she was having trouble dealing with the fact that she’d actually remembered so much. And all of it, most of it had to do with Donghae.
When she got home and took a shower she still felt so swept up. The reality she hadn’t been prepared for had come straight at her like a tornado and had sent her flying into the air. She still had no friend, no one to talk to, and she still felt helpless. Her world was slowly beginning to spin out of control and Victoria could no longer get used to it.
This lost feeling, this dissatisfying feeling of powerlessness against the forces coming at her made her feel so weak, vulnerable. So much had changed over time. Life had been so light, easy, cheerful, and almost fun.
Sinking into her bed she watched the glow coming from the window become dimmer and dimmer. For the first time in her life, Victoria had to admit she thought she was entering her first phase of depression.
***This might be one of my longest stories...ever. Defence was completed with a total of 408 pages minus the alternative ending I wrote for it. Their Kingdom Panorama is at page 402 as of right now and I've only reached the romantic flimsy scenes between HaeToria.
***I apologize for all the flashbacks. It was just what Vic was seeing as she heard the music.
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