"Are you sure you want to come?" 
"Yes" I didn't even have to think, "I want to." I don't care if Sajangnim is going to hit the roof, but I want to be there for Seunghyun, no matter what happens.

Inside, we waited with the very expensive toys and figurines. Now I know why - and before I could finish my thoughts, the door opened again, and in came Sajangnim, "Oh, Seunghyun-ah! You're back early?" then he turned to me and nodded. He eyed us suspiciously because after all, I've never ever step foot into his office, "What is it?" He settled down on the couch opposite us, with a poker face and god knows what is he thinking about. 
I was waiting for Seunghyun to say it - she's pregnant, but he kept quiet. I waited for a while more and with each passing minute, I see Sajangnim getting a little bit more impatient. Frankly, he was already patient enough to sit through these couple of minutes in utter silence. 

"We're expecting a baby." 


There. He said it. The words are out and instead of the fearful feeling I was expecting, a sense of relief flushed through me, coupled with a hint of joy. I was waiting to hear him say, "She's pregnant", but instead, he said "We're expecting a baby." The two meant the same, but the latter spoke so much more volumes. We. I smiled inwardly. 

Sajangnim looked anywhere but us. His head rested on his hands - he looked like he is contemplating, hard. Seunghyun, on the other hand, kept his gaze straight, but his hands found mine, occasionally brushing my knuckles with his thumbs. 

The silence was growing unbearable. I felt suffocated in this great room. What is he thinking? And what is he thinking? 

"Seunghyun, call for a meeting. Now. Go." Sajangnim finally said. In that moment, I knew that Sajangnim wanted time alone with me. For some reasons, I did not fear as much as I was expecting to. His words on the day of our wedding drifted into my head - "You are a great girl, Jae. I'm glad it's you, because I can't say the same or give my blessings has it been for another girl." I know I'm a little too hopeful but I can't falter. 

As soon as Seunghyun went out of the office, Sajangnim stood up and took the few steps to me, and extended his hands, "Congratulations, Jae." 
My eyes widened, and my heart stopped beating momentarily. My jaw hung ajar, slightly, while my body refuses to move. I know I'm expected to return his wishes but of all possibilities I've in my head, none of them brought me to this. I snapped out of my surprise and immediately return his handshake, clumsily muttering a thank you. 
"Are you angry at us...?" 
He sighed, but lit the cigar on the table, "I am angry, but not at the two of you. I have already foresee this, but I didn't expect this soon. How many months now?" And before I could answer, his eyes widened as if he thought of something, then he immediately stub out the stick in his hands, "I'm sorry... I was too careless." 
And I can't help a smile. I've never seen Sajangnim fluster, and the fact that he is being cautious for the baby makes me really happy. "Just slightly over a month."

"Jae, I odd to tell you this. I congratulate you and am happy for you but I can't say the same to Seunghyun. I don't know what will be in line for him. The next few months will be the tough, maybe even the toughest time of your life. But since you've already made the decision to marry him, I do hope you'll commit to it. I know you will, I just had to warn and remind you what's about to come. Whenever you feel like giving up, remember why you held on for so long in the first place." Sajangnim wanted to talk some more but Seunghyun barged into the office with a whole bunch of people - some I know personally, some I recognized, and some I've never seen before. His eyes settled on me, and he scrutinized the situation. Was he worried all this time? 

"Come, Hyunjae" Sajangnim said and he led us to the long table. 


Discussions after discussions, none of us could come to a conclusion. The meeting revolved around 1 big question - To reveal it to the public or not. A table of pros and cons were charted out on the blackboard, along with scribbles of key words that would affect the next move we are about to make. I've kept quiet the entire time, just listening to the team argue back and forth. The argues were less than friendly but they centered around the idea of doing what is best for us. Of course, statistics and stock markets were brought into the discussion but I am more than surprised that our safety and even the baby's future is in their concerns. 

There were two sides of the team and Seunghyun is inclinced towards the smaller group - to not reveal it. "Jae and the baby don't deserve this. I chose this life, but not them. I don't want to put them through this. I'll fend for their safety as long as I can." His eyes were glued onto mine as he spoke. I understand how much he hated to be under the public's scrutinity, and how much he would much prefer to keep us (the baby and I) out of it. He made his stand clear. The others looked at him defeatedly as if his words were the verdict. 

Aside from me who had been keeping quiet, Sajangnim was toned down as well, only dismissing suggestions that would not work out. "What do you think, Jae?" Suddenly, all eyes were on me. The sudden shift of attention is making me extremely uncomfortable and I thought twice about the decision in my head. I know Seunghyun's intentions but I can't imagine my baby having to lie to the world about his dad. At this point, no matter what decision we are about to make, it will change the baby's life. I'm sorry, Seunghyun, I can't be on your side this time. But can you do this, I asked myself. I hate attention. If this amount of attention gets me flustered, I can't imagine withstanding the scrutinity of the public. 

"The commotion will pass. Their curiosity will fade away." Jiyong said, as if he already knew my unspoken decision. He's right. This too shall pass, right...? Ironic. I hated those words years ago, but they comforted me now. This too shall pass. 

I looked at Jiyong, then at Seunghyun, and finally at Sajangnim, "I'm with Jiyong. I think its best, if we reveal it now." I see the faces around me relaxed and some even smiled proudly at me for a beat, while a handful of them tensed, along with Seunghyun. He is clearly unhappy. He excused himself from the discussion and I ran after him. 

"Oppa..." 
"Don't" he said, "Don't use that on me now. I'm angry at you." 
Phew, thank god, he's talking to me. "Do you know what you are about to do? Do you have a hint at all, what's coming at you? I can protect you from harm, but I can't protect you from feeling the way you'll feel when they say nasty things - and we know, it will happen. You hate attention, Jae. You won't be able to do this. I don't care what happens in the long run, I need to protect you now. Urgh!" 
He's so angry... I could tell from his eyes he is holding back so much anger. 
"How long do you want to hide? It's perfectly fine with me if I don't ever get to walk down the streets, holding your hands, flaunting to the world the perfect husband that I have, but it is not okay for the baby. How can the baby comprehend the fact that his father can't bring him out or attend any of his parents-teacher meeting or his annual talent show? How can he even come close to understanding that he can never speak to anyone who his father is? Seungh