I decided against showing Hanbyul the letter because it seemed like something personal and only intended for the addressee. If I showed it to her, no doubt she would discuss it with Sunggyu, who would in turn ask Woohyun about it. Which might convey a message to him that I was taking this whole situation lightly - which I wasn't - by discussing it freely with my friends like it was no big deal. And it might imply that I haven't accepted his forgiveness – which I hadn’t considered yet.
So I didn't tell her about it. But it kept bothering me the whole week. I got the impression that Byul was suspicious why I kept zoning out when she was talking to me because I was busy thinking about the letter.

“Sunggyu’s invited me to his football match tomorrow afternoon, and I said I might be busy but really I was waiting for him to invite me after we watched a movie together on Wednesday night. I really like him, Hana, and I think if I went to watch him play it might be a symbol of my love for him, or something. Do you think I should go? I don’t know if I should go. Does it look desperate if I went, though? Maybe if I turned up late. Or if I went just to watch the last ten minutes and pretend to be really busy. That would work, right?”

I have never once in my life received such a sincere, heartfelt letter that contained so much…emotion. It must've taken Woohyun ages to write it because there were numerous white outs on the page. Once I had gotten over my initial shock of reading it, I had to reread it about twenty times until the message sank in. He was sorry. He wanted me to forgive him.

But I wasn’t sure if he was the one I was angry at, if you know what I mean. Truthfully, I was angrier at myself than Woohyun. What had he done but tell me the truth in black and white? And now he was saying that I was beautiful because I cared about things, blah blah blah. I’m sure that’s just a way to charm me again because frankly, beautiful was one thing I was not. Maybe I was funny, caring and impatient, but beautiful? I could almost laugh. But then, why did he sound so sincere in the letter? I was an excellent reader of tone, and I could tell that he meant everything he said in the letter. But it wasn’t true.

I was truly shocked and to be honest a little scared. I would forgive him, in time, but then what would happen? That’s what I was scared of. Forgiving him would make it even more awkward between us. Would we become friends again after I said ok? Real life friends, or internet friends? It really depended on Woohyun. And I wasn’t sure what he would decide, but I didn’t really want to know because part of me knew he would lean toward just talking on the internet and not interacting with me in person because it would ruin his image.

“Should we go, Hana? Us? Maybe if we went together, it wouldn’t be so obvious that I liked Sunggyu that much. Because, you know, you have that thing with Woohyun?”

She looked at me, but I didn’t really notice because I was so deep in thought. There was a silence from her ramblings and I looked up.

“What?” I asked blankly, looking around.

“Have you even been listening to me, Hana?” Hanbyul asked irritably.
“Yes, I have!” I replied earnestly.
Why did Woohyun write me a letter, anyway? I wasn’t even worth much of his time, but he looked so beat up about the whole situation. Did I even help him that much, like he said in the letter? All I did was talk to him – nothing special at all. But I guess I sort of did understand where he was coming from, with the Nam Woohyun label and all the expectations and pressure that came with his status. But how was I to know that the person I was talking to was Nam Woohyun? Seriously, if I knew from day one that it was him, everything would have been different.

“HANA!” Byul screamed.
“WHAT!” I yelled back.
She sighed frustratedly. “WILL YOU COME WITH ME? I’ve been asking you for the past half an hour!”
“YES! I’ll come, gosh, calm your horses,” I replied quickly. Probably going to the mall to pick a new outfit for her date with Sunggyu, or something.
“Good! Meet at my house tomorrow at 10, and we’ll go together!”
“Fine,” I replied, trying to look excited.
“Yay!” Hanbyul exclaimed, her eyes gleaming. Then she launched into a description of Sunggyu’s perfection and I lay back on her bed and closed my eyes. All this Woohyun stuff was making me tired.

“Uh, Byul? Why are you dressed like that?” I arrived at Hanbyul’s house the next morning, ready to go shopping, only to see her dressed in a football jersey and shorts with zinc on her face.
She gave me the most weirdest look. “I’m trying to show my support for Sunggyu, duh.”
I scratched my head. “But aren’t we going shopping?”
“What? No? We’re going to Sunggyu’s football match!" She paused. "Aish, I knew you weren’t listening yesterday.”

Sunggyu, football, match? Three words screamed in my head and connected to one; Woohyun. I turned around and started to walk away from Hanbyul. Sure, I loved her, but I wasn’t ready to see Woohyun yet.

“Where are you going?!” Byul grabbed onto my wrist.
I turned around. “I’m not going, Byul. Woohyun will be there.”
She sighed exasperatedly. “No one’s telling you to go talk to him, Hana. He’ll be too busy playing on the field to see you. You can disguise yourself if you want.”
I paused as I contemplated her words. That was true. He was probably too busy playing to see me. And I could borrow one of Byul’s beanies and sunglasses to hide my face. Plus, curiosity had gotten the better of me. I had never watched Woohyun play, and I could see whether all those times he complained to me of sore muscles paid off.

We arrived at the school oval and found a seat on the bleachers. I had a beanie on but no sunnies because Hanbyul’s face was small, unlike mine.
“I’m going to find Sunggyu, okay? DON’T run away. Or I’ll get you to pay me back for that movie ticket that time.”
I scoffed. “I’ll pay you back fifteen dollars right now, Byul,” I said, laughing and reaching into my bag.
“No! I was just joking,” she laughed. “But don’t go, okay?”
I nodded and stayed put.
Byul made her way down the steps toward the oval where the players were getting ready to play by warming up and stretching. I saw Sunggyu look up as soon as she was there, and his face was glowing. He smiled so wide that his eyes seemed to disappear completely into his face, and he seemed energized and motivated. I watched them exchange a few words before my eyes couldn’t help but wander. Where was Woohyun..?

I narrowed my eyes and tried to see into the player’s helmets, searching for Woohyun. Before I knew it, he was looking straight back up and me. I jolted back in my seat, shocked. How had he known I was sitting here? I was pretty far away. Then I saw Hanbyul pointing up at me and smiling to him. I took a deep breath. Girl was going to die when we got home. She started making gestures at me to come down and sit with her, apparently finding a seat closer to the players where she could watch Sunggyu more carefully. I shook my head and motioned that I would stay here. She crossed her arms and looked angry. I stuck out my tongue. Then, she tapped Woohyun on the shoulder and whispered something in his ear. Then, he started making his way up the bleachers. Toward me. I gulped and tried to look for somewhere to make a run for it. Why was he coming toward me?! Why were there so many people sitting beside me? Why was I sitting in the middle of the row?! My heart started beating quickly in my chest.

As he got closer, I could hear the sophomores and freshmen girls sitting around me catch their breath. I could feel their glares on my back as he approached me.
“Hana,” he breathed, a little out of breath from climbing the stairs. “Byul wants you to sit down there with her.”
I bit my lip and shook my head slightly. Where was my voice? Stuck in my throat like the lump that had formed there.
“I’ll just stay here, I think,” I managed to say.
“Excuse me, sorry, excuse me,” Woohyun said as he made his way closer to me, excusing himself by walking in front of the people sitting near me. “Come on, you don’t want Hanbyul to be a loner, do you?”
He gave me that crooked smile that made my heart flip in my chest. I couldn’t do anything now. He was standing above me, smiling cautiously at me. Everyone sitting around me was now looking at me like I was mad.

I stood up from my seat.
“Yay!” Woohyun clapped, taking my hand and leading me down the stairs.

I shook him off lightly, looking at his beautiful brown eyes plainly. He dropped my hand immediately and scratched his head in confusion. Did he seem to forget..?
“Sorry,” he said. “I didn’t mean to, well – um, you know, uh, did you – did you read my letter?”
I nodded. “Um, yeah, I did.”
He looked at me. I looked back at him. How long we were just staring like that, I didn’t know.
“Stop blocking the stairs, you love birds,” an old man growled at us.
I turned around and bowed apologetically. Then I made my way down the stairs quickly before Woohyun could say anything, my heart about to leap out of my chest.